The Life of Renesmee Cullen
by fantasyfanfic4life
Summary: When your life is in fast forward and the supernatural is all you know, growing up can get difficult. Renesmee's life since that fateful day in the clearing has been peaceful and perfect. That is, until know. What could disturb this farytail life? Puberty and hormones. Even when your a half vampire hybrid thats imprinted to a shapeshifting werewolf, you just cant escape being human
1. Chapter 1

I remembered my 4th birthday. I was physically around 14, and I had asked for no parties, just dinner with Jake and a day with my family.

I also remember for weeks before that, being emotional and moody. Dad and grandpa said that I was going through puberty, and we had to talk about what that meant. I also remember dodging that conversation for days. Finally, I was trapped, in my room, with mom and dad in the doorway. I knew I wouldn't be getting out of this one. I sighed and slumped onto my bed.

"If I really have to do this, can it just be mom." _Please daddy._ I thought. _Don't make me hear this from you._ He sighed, but nodded, kissing my forehead, and leaving the room. Momma had smiled sympathetically, sitting down on the bed next to me and leaning against the headboard.

"Renesmee hunny. I'll try to make this as painless as possible." She stuck to textbook talk, making things so much easier that way. She explained puberty, and how my body would mature more into a woman's. She said she wasn't sure for certain if I would get a monthly cycle, cause no one really knew before me. So I would have to wait and see. She told me what it meant, if I did get a period. How it worked, and that when that time came, it could be possible to conceive a baby. She cringed at that, saying how again, they didn't know for sure if it was possible, And that I had a very long time to find out.

She tried her best to explain the feelings that accompanied this next stage, and explained how it was important to learn how to control my temper and be grown up. Over all, it was pretty painless.

When I asked her how it was possible to have a baby, she said that conversation could wait a little longer. I didn't push it. I felt overwhelmed, so I nodded and that what was that.

I didn't think much more of it, till I woke up a couple weeks later. On my birthday, no less. And found my pajamas and sheets stained with blood. I knew what it meant, but I still wanted my mom.

"Mama, can you come here please." I called out, knowing she would hear me.A soft knock came from my door.

"Come in." I said quietly. She walked over to me, her eyes already knowing. Daddy must have heard me and told her. She put her hand out, taking mine.

"Come on hunny, lets get you cleaned up."

She walked with me to my bathroom, starting the big tub and filling it with bubbles. She turned around, and I stripped, getting in the water and relaxing into the heat. She turned the taps off, kissed my forehead and got up.

"I'm going to put these in the wash with your blankets. Will u be okay for a couple minutes?"

I nodded, and felt so grateful for my mom. I washed up in the warm water, and she came back a couple minutes later. A large towel in her hands, some clothes and a couple boxes. She put everything down on the sink, and explained both boxes. Tampons, and pads. She recommended I used the pads till I was more comfortable. I agreed, she handed me the towel, and stepped out to let me change.

I loved that she didn't baby me, and gave me what little privacy I was allowed. I followed her directions and changed into the clothes she gave me. Some comfortable yoga pants and a sweater. I left the bathroom, bouncing over to where she sat on the bed, and wrapping my arms around her.

"Thank you mama." There was a soft knock on the door and daddy's head stuck around the corner.

"How are my girls." He asked, and I smiled.

" Where good daddy." He walked over to us, sitting down and wrapping both of us in his arms. I was content, in my parents embrace. The rest of my day went on pretty normal, with birthday wishes and games and hugs. Jacob came over before dinner, wishing me a happy birthday and giving me a hug.

He disappeared with daddy for a couple minutes and when he came back he looked almost sad. I placed my hand on his warm face. _What's wrong Jacob?_ He just shook his head.

"Nothing Nessie, how about some dinner? I'm starved." he flashed me his best smile and I forgot about his sad face.

It wasn't until later that night, I was curled into my bed, thinking about my day, and my happy life that I understood Jacob's face. Jacob had imprinted on me the day I was born. He told me, a long time ago, that it meant we were connected. He would always belong to me, however I needed him. When I was younger, he was the best big brother. As I grew, and he became my best friend, he would tell me more about the imprint. How Emily and Sam were, but also Quil and Clair. He said it was different for everybody, and he never wanted me to think I had to be with him when I was older. It just meant that he would always be in my life. But I understood, that one day I would see him differently. The imprint meant he would be what I needed, so if I felt that way, he would to, wouldn't he?

I could only imagine how hard that could be. To watch me grow up so fast. Mama and dad were always telling me to enjoy my life the way it is. Every stage for me was so fleeting. So I learned to love it while it happened, and not rush the next one. That was what I would do. I would enjoy being young a little while longer.


	2. Chapter 2:Developing

A/N: Now that I have your attention, hello readers. This is the story I have been imaging in my head for the past couple years, and have finally decided to get it out. While I write what I see and think in my head I always welcome reviews and constructive cristism! I hope you all enjoy

Disclaimer: All are wonderful characters come from the talented stephanie Meyers and twisted to my will. Rated M for later chapters.

* * *

DEVELOPING:

The year between my 4th birthday and my 5th was one of the fasted years ever. So much had changed for me. As my mind developed at such a fast rate, I excelled at all my home school study's. I was very smart, mama said I got that from dad.

I followed mama's advice about my emotions. Taking them as they came, and learned to analyze them. I could usually understand pretty well why I was feeling a certain way, and I was getting good at controlling them.

I had the biggest problem with my temper, dad says that came from mom. It was usually directed at my uncle Emmett, who loved to torture people. He was always calling me kiddo, or squirt. My temper was always wired to my age. I was sensitive about me age, rightfully so. I was physically around 16, and hated to be called 4.

It was around this time mama decided it was time to finish are 'talk'. It was just me and her again, and she explained in further detail about what would happen to me. How certain hormones would cause me to feel things, and that those things weren't wrong, but I should never give into them unless I loved that person with all my heart. She tried to explain without making it personal that when two people loved each other very much, they wanted to be together in every way. She explained the concept of sex, and how you could become pregnant if you didn't use protection.

It was hard to hear from my mom, knowing what her and dad got up to. But it wasn't exactly new information. Uncle Emmett was always telling dirty jokes.

I was overwhelmed by how fast my body had matured. As the weeks passed, I seemed to get taller every day. My round face and soft, teen like features melted away to something more grown up. Defined cheekbones, and fuller lips. My waist curved inward, and my hips flared out. Aunt Rose told me I had an hourglass figure.

One morning, about five months after my 4th birthday, I was in my closet, picking out my clothes for the day. I didn't have anything planned, so I grabbed a pair of jeans, pulling them up my legs and-nope. They would not go over my butt. Frustrated, I sighed and replaced them with leggings. Pulling a tank top over my head, I yanked it in place and groaned. How was it possible, in less than a week I had managed to develop a full chest.

"MOM!"

I was so frustrated I had tears in my eyes. This was not fair. Why couldn't I just be normal? She hesitated in the door way, probably sensing my crankiness.

"What's wrong hunny?" Her voice was calm and soothing, she walked over and wrapped me in her arms.

"Nothing fits" I mumbled.

"What do you mean sweetheart?" I huffed and pointed at the Jean's on the floor. I scowled at the offensive piece of material.

"They won't go past my butt and I'm falling out of my top." I crossed my arms over my chest, or tried to.

"Ugh!" I think I actually stomped my foot.

"Renesme, calm down. You're growing up hunny, its natural, and im afraid it's gonna keep happening. I'm not busy today, ill take you to port Angeles and well get some clothes. Okay?" I breathed, trying to calm myself and nodded.

"Good, get some shoes, I'll be right back." She disappeared, and I riffled through my shoe closet, grabbing some boots. Mom came back a minute later, keys in one hand and a sweatshirt in the other.

"Here hunny. Its one of your fathers." I pulled it over my head, taking comfort in his scent. He and my uncle Jasper were out on a hunting trip. She pulled me out of the cottage, towards the main house

"With any luck, we sneak past Alice and make it out of town before she know's were gone." I giggled at my mom, scary vampire or not, she would hide from Alice and her shopping every time. We didn't make it. Aunt Alice was in the garage, waiting for us with a pout on her pale face.

"Dammit" mom whispered at me. I laughed.

"Alright, you can come. But I'm driving." Mom said. Aunt Alice looked like she was gonna protest for a moment, then clapped and jumped into the passenger seat of daddies Volvo. Me and mom followed.

It was a relatively harmless trip. Aunt Alice mostly shopped, I try'd on things, and mama was the deciding vote on what was appropriate. She let a couple things slid, winking and saying " Don't tell your father." I was standing in the dressing room, and aunt Alice flung a load over the door.

"Try on a couple sizes and tell me which one fits." In my hands, lay 4 different bras. I blushed, but did it. I tried on 3 with no success, and fit the 4th one. I glanced at the tag before sending it back over the top. 34C. I wasn't really sure what that meant. The bra disappeared and my moms voice floated over the door.

"Well, we know you didn't get your curves from me. Must be from your dads side." She laughed lightly and I blushed. She was right tho, i already had more curves than her, and still had two more years till I was done growing.

We finished shopping, stopping for food so I could eat. We made it home before dinner, mom and aunt Alice bringing in all the bags. Uncle Emmett was in the living room with Jacob, playing on the xbox. They loved playing video games.

Jacob paused and had me in a hug in seconds. I laughed, feeling better with him here. He had been busy the past couple days. Uncle Emmett, being the annoying one he was started poking around the bags, whistling to himself.

"Watchaa got there kiddo." I growled at his nickname, already getting worked up.

"None of your business nosy." I snapped at him, turning to Jake.

"Can u help me bring these to my room?"

"Sure Nessie." I turned, intending to grab some bags. Uncle Emmett was bent over the bags, a huge grin on his face.

Hanging of his finger, was a green lace bra. My bra. I blushed scarlet, from head to toe. Emmett's booming laughed echoed the whole house.

"Well well. I guess your'e no kiddo anymore. A c cup? Dam Ness." I snarled.

"Emmett, put that down now!" Aunt Rose's voice came from the stairs, firm and dangerous. He dropped it in the bag, turning to Aunt Rose and dropped his head.

"Get upstairs." She growled, and he was gone. I was mortified, I couldn't believe he did that. Jake was still standing besides me, but his body was stiff.

I panicked, froze, and bolted. Running at full speed to the cottage, slamming my bedroom door and throwing myself to my bed. Tears ran down my face, from what I wasn't sure. Humiliation, anger? I didn't know.

It was only a couple moments later there was a soft knock on my door, and it creaked open. Heavy footsteps approached me and a steady heart beat told me who it was. The bed sagged and a large warm hand rested on my head.

"Nessie hunny...are you okay?" I couldn't look at him, I was still embarrassed. I just shook my head. He stroked my hair, calming me. My tears slowed, and dried. I sniffled, pulling myself together. I shifted, so I could see him. Still hiding half in my blankets.

"There you are beautiful." He smiled, but I didn't.

" What are you so upset about?" I shrugged my shoulders, knowing he could feel it.

"Nessie sweetheart, I know you're embarrassed. But you don't have anything to be embarrassed about. Its completely normal, I know its hard. Growing up so fast, believe me. It's hard for me. I finally get use to something, and then it changes. You're growing so quick, it's hard to wrap my head around. But your'e so incredible, you take everything so easily and do it so well. I'm so proud of who your becoming. Don't let Emmett get to you too much." He smiled, and placed his palm on my cheek. I couldn't help it, I sat up and threw my arms around him. He hugged me back tightly.

"Better?" He asked. I nodded

" Thank you, Jacob. I love you." He grinned, kissed my forehead.

"I love you to hunny. Now, lets go get those bags."

We walked back to the house, collecting my bags. Before I got out Emmett came down the stairs, followed by Aunt Rosalie. Her arms crossed over her chest, and her face stern. Emmett looked back at her, and she nodded. I had to stifle my giggle, he looked like a tiny disciplined child. His head down, he mumbled.

"I'm sorry Nessie." Rose coughed.

" It was wrong of me to flaunt your personal belongings and ill never do it again." He ended his sentence with a pout.

"I forgive you." I said, and smiled at him. He went back to his game, and me and Jake brought the clothes to the cottage.

He laid on my bed and chatted about his day while I put my clothes away. I bagged my clothes that didn't fit, and put them aside to give to grandma Esme. She always made sure they went to goodwill. I sat down, and just hung out. It was always easy with Jake, he was my best friend.


	3. Chapter 3: Favorite

On my sixth birthday, aunt Alice and aunt Rose had decided they were going to throw me a sweet sixteen birthday party.

I was almost scared of what that would entitle, my aunts tended to over due everything, but daddy had told me he would over see everything and make sure they didn't go over the top.

He laughed, and said that I was so much like mama, with presents and party's. I knew my mom hated them. I didn't so much hate them, I just hated being the center of attention. Somehow, I knew I wasn't getting away from this one.

My whole life, has been charted very meticulously. Grandpa Carlisle has charted everything down since I was born. On my sixth birthday, grandpa estimated me to be physically 18, Mentally 22, and emotionally 16. I didn't understand what was different about mental and emotional, he explained to me that I was very smart, and could understand complex schooling. But I still let my emotions take over when I was frustrated or upset. I blushed when he said that, I knew that my temper, which everyone says is just like moms, took over sometimes.

" You're still very young in some ways Renesmee. Don't rush it hunny. You'll get there. Just enjoy your time" He kissed my forehead, and disappeared to his office.

I waited in the living room, for Jake to pick me up. He was taking me out for a birthday surprise, while my family set up are house for the party. Aunt Alice had laid out my outfit for me, claiming my sense of fashion was too much like mamas.

I didn't mind her dressing me, I was used to it. She always knew how to make me look good, but retain my own feel. The dark wash skinny jeans, went perfect with my forest green long knit sweater. A pair of dark heeled boots, and my hair pulled back finished the look. She was always trying to put makeup on me, which I put my foot down on that one.

A knock on the door sent me flying across the room, pulling it open and revealing my Jacob. He wrapped me in his arms, lifting me from the ground and twirling in a circle. I laughed, exuberant. Jacob always made me happy, from the day I was born. I guess it had to do with the imprint, but he had been my best friend for so long, he was just a permanent fixture in my life. I knew that one day things would be different, but for now, I was content with my Jacob the way he was.

"Put me down!" I squealed.

His deep laugh echoed around the house, and he set me on my feet. Placing his hands on my shoulders, and taking a step back. Looking me over from head to toe. His smile was grand, and I couldn't help but smile back. "Nessie, I swear you grow every time I look away. Happy birthday sweetheart!" His hug was gentler this time, and I laughed.

"Don't get soft on me Jake." I pulled back, and turned as I heard the footsteps approach from the kitchen. My mother smiling, had my dad in tow, who was frowning slightly. He glanced at Jacob, and nodded, infinitesimally. I looked between the two, curiously. But I knew I would never get it out of them, so I let it drop and went over to mom, hugging her to me.

"Have fun hunny, and Jacob. She needs to be at the cottage for 4. If she's late there won't be enough time to change for the party, and you know how Alice is." Daddy chuckled. "Yes bells" he said. I hugged daddy, while mama kissed Jacob on the cheek. Jacob had told me long ago, that he used to think he was in love with my mom, but that it was just the universe pulling him to me. I didn't fully understand, but I knew Jacob belonged to me, so I didn't let it bother me. We said goodbye, and he led me out of the house, walking me to his new baby.

It was a 1970 dodge challenger, that he restored with his bare hands. Jake, and a couple of the guys from the rez had pooled their resources together and opened their own garage. It started local and small, but quickly grew.

"Soo" I said, as he walked in front, and open my door. Always a gentleman. "What are we diong? " I smiled up at him, hoping to get something. He stuck out his tongue. "Not a chance Cullen." and closed my door. I couldn't help but laugh. " Very mature" I said, as he got in his own side. "What are you, 6? " I laughed loudly at my own joke. He cracked a smile, and started the engine, turning around and winding his way out the Cullen drive.

"What are we doing today?" I asked again. He reached over. Grabbing my hand in his. This was normal, he always held my hand. "Well" he started. "Since it's your birthday, is there something you would like to do?" I thought about that. I just wanted to spend time with him, it didn't matter to me what we were doing.

"Hmmm. Nope" I said. He grinned, and turned onto the highway, going the opposite way from forks. "Well then, I guess you'll have to wait to and see."

About half an hour later, we were making are way into port Angeles. I was excited, to be out. I didn't get to do that much in Forks, I was only allowed at grandpa Charlie's and la push. So I loved going out into the city when I could.

My smile was huge, and I was practically bouncing in my seat, as Jake pulled up to a parking spot on the side of a crowded street, and got out, coming over and opening my door. I climbed out, and smiling hugely, took in the surrounding scene.

People bustled around, going about their Thursday business. Jake grabbed my hand, and pulled me along, walking leisurely down the shop lined streets. I knew he intended to just walk, he knew I loved to look at everything I could. The people, the shops, there was always so much to look at.

He stopped in front of a window, with the oddest collection of antique and new things I had ever seen. Dolls, jewelry, Christmas ornaments, all hung around the picture window. He pulled us inside, being careful not to hit anything in the tight for him doorway, and to an old lady, at the back of the counter. She matched her shop, with an arrangement of things scattered, around her neck and in her hair. She glanced up, and noticed Jacob immediately. "Jacob Black" she said. Her voice was gravelly with age, but warm. I was confused. I smiled politely, as Jacob grasped this woman's hand, shaking it gently with both of his. "Miss Caddo, nice to see you again." He smiled, and placing his hand on my back, pulled me forward. " This is Ness, Nessie, this is Miss Caddo. She's a grandmother to one of are younger brothers on the rez. She also owns this shop." I wasn't sure why we were here, but my parents taught me to be polite, so I smiled, and waved.

"Hello. It's nice to meet you" I glanced at Jacob, who was watching me. He smiled, and turned to the lady, said. "Is everything ready? I might be a little early, I can come back i-" she waved her hand, dismissively. "Nonsense, its all ready. Have it wrapped up and everything" she reached under her counter, and produced a silver little box. Handing it to him, she smiled and looked at me. "You have a wonderful birthday hunny. You have a very special man right there." She winked, and turned, disappearing into another room.

I looked up at him, pink from her comment and raised my eyebrows. I pointed to his pocket, where he had stashed the box." Is that for me?" I tried to give him my best, innocent smile. He laughed, and steering me out of the shop, said "I don't know, I guess you'll have to wait." We continued down the street, heading towards a peer, and looking out over the ocean.

My hair blew around my face, past me and hit Jacob square in the face. I busted out laughing, doubled over with tears in my eyes. He just chuckled. "You know" I said, breathing past my laughter. "If you let me cut it, we wouldn't have that problem" but I pulled my hair from his face, tugging it around and to the other side, smoothing my curls out. " No way!" He tried to sound appalled, but he laughed. Reaching up, and tugging a curl around his finger. " Besides, im not the only one. I love your hair like this, its so wild." He leaned closer as he spoke, and his deep eyes held mine. I blushed.

Out of the corner of my eye, I noticed a group of 3 guys heading towards us. "Are you planning on feeding me anytime soon? Or do I have to bite you? I whispered the last part, so only he could hear. He laughed "You could try, might be interesting." I was about the stick my tongue out at him when the guys came closer, and the one in the middle stopped, looking me up and down, and let out a low long whistle.

"Hey there hunny...why don't you come with me and ill show you a good time."

His smile was creepy and I hated the way this man looked at me. Jake, still leaning towards me froze, and the humor in his eyes melted, turning black and fury replaced his features. I grabbed his arm, willing him to stay and looked into his face. " Jake, don't. Come on, im hungry." I grabbed his hand, and pulled with all my strength. He turned, staring at the guy, who began to cower behind his buddies. I yanked again.

"Jacob" I said forcefully. His hand held mine tighter, and he glared at the guy, before turning, wrapping his arm around my shoulders and pulling me forward. I breathed a sigh of relief.

We walked till I found a little dinner, nestled between to bigger shops and I pulled him in taking a seat and grabbing a menu. A waitress came around, eyeing Jacob with obvious interest, and I growled under my breath. His eyes met mine, and he gave me a confused look.

"What can I get for you hunny?" She looked at him, smiling fakely and leaning over. He waved a hand towards me.

"Nessie, do u know what u want?"

She reluctantly turned towards me, her face scowling and eyeing me. "I'll have a coke and the lunch special." She quickly turned back towards Jake, the smile plastered again. A strong wave of jealousy washed through me. I placed my hand on his arm. Mine, I growled in my head. He coughed, laughing and glancing at my hand on his arm. Oh shit.

"I'll have the same" he said, put the menu down and grabbed my hand, turning away from her. My face was hot, and probably red as a tomato. She left without another word. His face relaxed and he grinned. "Were a bit of a pair, aren't we?" I just nodded. " At least im not the only one." The waitress set are cokes down, and left. I grabbed mine, letting go of his hand and took a sip. " The only one what?" I asked. He smirked. " The only one who gets jealous." I grimaced. " Ya well.." I didn't have a response.

The waitress came out a couple minutes later, placed are plates on the table, turned to Jake and said " Is there Anything else I can get you hunny?" He didn't look at her, just said no then started digging into his food. She left again. I looked down, my lunch special consisted of fried fish, french fries and a pickle. I liked fish but I wasn't crazy about french fries. We ate in relative silence, and when I was done Jacob finished mine. He stood up, leaving money on the table and walking me out.

We walked in comfortable silence, back the way we had come. He grabbed my hand, pulling me closer. "Nessie honey...you know you don't have anything to be jealous about. I'm all yours. " His hand in mine was soothing, comfortable. " I know Jake." He smiled. We walked and talked some more. Goofing around, and wondering the shops till it was time to leave.

The ride was calm, and we made it home bye 4. Jake walked me around the big house, through the woods and towards the cottage.

"Do you know what she has planed? Is it going to be terrible?" I asked.

He laughed, and I couldn't help but smile. "No clue, hun. And yes, it's probably gonna be terrible. But ill be there, so it's okay." He kissed my forehead, and left me at door, jogging his way back.

I walked into the cottage, and into the arms of Aunt Rose and Alice. My mother was there, standing of to the side. "Where's daddy? " I asked her. "He's up at the house, helping the others getting ready." She smiled, but knew better than to get in the path of aunt Alice.

They pulled me into my bedroom, which had been renovated since my birth to accommodate my growth, and sat me in a low swivel chair. Not wasting time, she started on my hair, and despite my protest, applying makeup to my face.

In less than an hour, I was stood in front of a floor length mirror, looking at an elegant, young woman. With a start, I realized it was me. The woman stood tall, In 4 inch gold sparkle heels. The tulle of her pale pink skirt flowed out, swaying around her body. The bodice was stiff and fitted, matching the pale pink, but was dotted with the same gold sparkles. The sweetheart neckline showed just a hint of her curves. Her usually loose curly hair was pined back in the front, and tight curled ringlets lined her soft face. There wasn't a lot of makeup, just some mascara and eye shadow, simple, But dramatic.

I knew I had always been unique, and sure I was pretty. But compared to my family, I had always looked and felt plain. Standing her, at my reflection. I couldn't help but feel beautiful. I smiled and aunt Alice all but bounced out if her skin. Mom walked up from behind me, placing her hands on my shoulder and kissing my head.

"Were going to get dressed, and meet you at the big house. There's someone waiting for you." I listened, and could hear a heavy, sturdy heart beat, behind the door. She smiled, and all three of them ghosted out the door, leaving it open.

I heard his footsteps behind me, turning around, I opened my arms wide, and did a little twirl. His grin was enough to outshine the sun. He was my sun, my own, personal sun. He stepped forward, cupping my cheeks with both his big hands, and kissed my forehead.

"You look incredible hunny. So grown up." He stepped back, and I noticed for the first time what he was wearing. My Jacob, was dressed in a black tux, his white dress shirt underneath contrasted with his dark russet skin. His tie, matched the same pale pink of my dress. He laughed, stepping back and doing an imitation of my twirl. I couldn't help but giggle at him. "Jacob. You look so handsome." He bowed, and pulled me into his arms, hugging me tightly.

Stepping back, his hand produced a silver little box from his jacket pocket. "For you, madam." I grinned, grabbing the box, and pulled the delicately tied bow, unraveling it. I lifted the lid, and peered inside. Nestled between silk, was a delicate silver chain. Hanging from it was a circle pendent, with the outline of a red brown wolf. My hand reached out, of its own accord. I stroked the surface, my fingers moving over the raised wolf like it was jumping out of the pendent. I was awed, speechless.

His hand reached out, and flipped it over, showing me the backside. Forever, yours. Was engraved into the cold hard metal. I blinked furiously, trying to hold in the tears. He grabbed it from the box, and spun me toward the mirror. Lifting his arms over my head, the pendant settled on my skin, and he secured it. He gentle lifting my hair over the chain, and letting it drop. I smiled at his reflection. "Happy birthday." He said, and kissed my head.

He walked me to the big house, where I was dazzled bye the flowers, balloons, and streamers decorated around the house. All of my favorite people were there, from la push and forks. They all wished me happy birthday, and we danced, ate and partied the night away. It was my favorite birthday.


	4. Chapter 4: Leaving

The snow melted, and spring surfaced. It was early april, Grandpa said my growth had slowed down to almost a crawl, and in just a couple months id be fully matured. I was excited to be able to wake up not looking different. I was nervous, because I would look the same after wards for the rest of my life.

Daddy declared my home schooling over for the summer, saying he would need to read new material to teach me. I laughed at that.

I could feel the changes in me, not physical, but mentally. I was getting better at controlling my emotions, and I felt my childish tendencies start to fade. Most of my toys and stuffed animals got put away, I only kept one out. A stuffed wolf that jacob had given to me when I was 2.

Daddy suggested I picked up a hobby, so he started leaving books in my room for me to read. I loved reading them, but I finished them quickly, so I also studied art and grandma taught me how to paint. I excelled passed her quickly and fell in love with painting. My life was almost perfect, except for the whispered conversations that started behind closed doors.

One night me and jacob were having a horror movie marathon, eating pizza and laughing at the gore on tv. As one movie ended, mom and dad came in to the big house, after going 'hunting'. Ew. They turned off the tv, sitting down and facing me and jake. Uh oh. This can't be good.

"Whats going on?" Jacob sounded alarmed, and I could see he knew something was wrong.

Dad spoke first. "Renesmee, Jacob. The family has been discussing something and its time we talk about it..."he paused, And Jacob grabbed my hand. Mama looked sad.

He sighed. "Im afraid..the time has come when we need to move on." He paused, letting it sink in. "We've spent to much time here already, we didn't wanna move while you were growing so fast sweatheart. But if we stay here any longer, im afraid things might get dangerous." He said.

He looked at Jacob, who for the first time looked pale, and like someone had punched him. I understood, Jacob was part of me, he was my Jacob. I couldn't leave him. Dad nodded, he must have been listening to Jacob's thoughts.

"We decided on Montana, its not two far away, just two states. It has a decent amount of over cast days." Mama put her hand on dads, stopping him.

"Nessie baby, why don't you go to the cottage and process. We can finish this conversation tomorrow." Her voice was gentle, and I was greatful. I felt like everything was falling apart. Slipping away. Jacob. My Jacob, Not with me. I stood and left, mechanically. To over whelmed to think. I sat on my bed, in my pjs, for I don't know how long. Just stunned, what would I do? I couldnt imagine my life without Jacob.

I didn't hear him come into the cottage, or knock on my door, but suddenly he was there, sitting on my bed pulling me into his arms. Wiping the tears from my face, he kissed my forhead, And rocked me gently back and forth. I touched his cheek. What are we ganna do my Jacob? I was trying to stay calm, but the tears pooled again.

"Dont cry Nessie. Its okay. Shhh." He held me tighter. "Im not going anywhere hunny. You can't get ride of me that easily." He whisperd. But dad said? "I know what he said. But that doesn't matter, im not leaving you. Im coming with you guys. I already talked to Bella and Edward and its ganna be okay."

I pulled back, stunned. My hand fell. "But Jacob, I dont understand. You cant just leave everything. What about your work? And the pack, and Billy and Rachel. You cant leave your family for me."

I shook my head, the tears coming again. He caught my face, stopping me and looked into my eyes. "Renesmee, you are my family. You are my imprint. I cannot live without you, the rest ill deal with. Billy will understand and he has Rachel. Im sure Leah would love to be incharge of the pack and I won't be that far away. I'll check in and if they need me ill be half a day runs away. And as for work, we've talking about hiring a manager to deal with finances and ordering." He breathed loudly, soundng nervous.

"Instead, I think once we move. Im going to finish school online and look into some business courses at a local collage.." He said, sounding very unsure of himself.

"Jacob, that's amazing. You would do so good." I was so proud. I hugged him tightly, feeling grateful he was there. "are you sure?" I whisperd. " Absolutely hunny. Im not going anywhere." I felt so much better. I laid with him for a while, my head on his chest and fell asleep there.

I dreamed of jacob that night, we were out in the city, hanging out like we usually did. When he wrapped his arms around me and hugged me tight, I didn't wanna let go. Hed hugged me a million times in my life, but this felt diffrent.

I woke up the next morning, but I couldn't remember any dreams. I sat down to talk with mama and dad that day. They went over the details. We were moving to Kalispell Montana.

Grandma and grandpa had purchased a older built property that butted against the flathead national park, it was over two thousand miles of forest and touched parts of Canada. Grandma wanted to do some remodeling to the house first, so we had till the end of july till we moved.

That summer seemed to come so fast. I spent time with Jake, and when he wasn't there, diong pack things, I painted, or worked with grandma. She came to me a couple weeks after that first talk with mom and dad, explaining her project and wanted my help. She showed me the plans for our new house, explaining anything I didn't understand.

She wanted my help, with designing my room, and Jacob's guest house. Behind the big house, was an in ground pool, and off to the side of that, was a pool house. Grandma wanted Jacob to feel at home, so she planned him his own place. It was so pretty I was jealous. The outside matched the big white house, with big windows wrapping around his place. That was were the similarities ended. While grandma and my vampire family seemed to enjoy the white on cream scheme, grandma planned Jacob's to his style better.

She had me pick all the colors, warm browns, dark greens, and beige. We both decided on furniture, picking large sturdy peices. Jacob's home had two bedrooms. His master, and a guest room, each had there own bathroom. Off his bedroom was french doors, that lead to his own little private patteo, that was blocked from the big house.

I smiled so hugely when she told me that I was so grown up she had to rethink my whole bedroom scheme. I picked out colors, and furniture and was so excited it made leaveing forks almost bearable. Grandpa charlie was sad when we told him, but said he had never been to Montana and would have to visit.

Most things were set and it was the beginning of july. Forks had one of its rare heat waves, and me and Jake were outside. Hiding under a big oak tree, having a grandma aproved picnic. He was shirtless, wearing his cut off jeans and laying on the grass. His arms and legs spread out around him. I copied him, basking in the cool shade.

"It is so friken hot." I complained, pulling my tanktop from my sticky skin. I was in my shortest shorts, and lightest tank top, And I was sweating. I didn't even know I could sweat, thats how hot it was.

He laughed. "When did you learn big kid words?" I stuck my tongue out at him.

"You know Jacob, I am almost an adult."

I glanced at him. His tan russet skin always me jealous. It contrasted so well with his white teeth. I had began to understand some of the emotion's mama told me about. I always new Jacob was handsome, but so was the rest of the men in my family. It was a fact. But I had started to recognize certain parts of why he was so good looking.

First, were his eyes. They were so dark brown sometimes you would swear they were black. And so full of emotion. He has perfect control of his face most of the time, but his eyes. In those eyes I could see everything. Next was his smile. He had the ability to lighten my whole entire day, with one his famous smiles. Last, was his muscles. This man was wrapped, from head to toe in muscles. My eyes unfocused, and my heart seemed to beat louder, thinking of Jacob and his muscles. "Ahum." My eyes focused, and I realized I was staring. I blushed, and looked away.

"As I was saying, I do know swear words." He laughed, seeming unfazed bye my embarrassment. "oh ya, like what?" His voice was challenging. I turned back towards him, and his face was confident, a smirk on his lips. Well, he started it. I smiled innocently, turning onto my stomach and looking into his eyes. "Fuck." His eyes grew, there depths pulling me in. I couldn't help but laugh at his expression. He watched me for a second, his eyes darting from my face to, what? I looked down at myself, noticing how low my tank top was, had jacob really been looking at me? When I looked back up his eyes were at the sky. But it almost looked like he was blushing, under his tan skin.

"Were did you learn that from?" He asked, I couldnt help but laugh. "You should here yourself when u play xbox with Emmett, thats not the worst thing iv heard you say." He frowned, but before he could say anything more footsteps approached and mom and dad were making there way to us.

I sat up, pulling my top up alittle and willing my blush away. They paused infront of us, and dad glanced between Jake and I, raising his eyebrows at me but didn't comment.

"Whats up edward?" Jacob asked, Mom answered.

"We wanted to talk to Renesmee about something."

Oh no. Not again. Mom settled on the grass infront of me and Jake, but she didn't look upset or sad.

"Me and your father have been talking, and we understand how hard things have been for you, growing up the way you did. Your birthday is coming up soon, and you'll be full grown." Did Jacob see how dads eyes flashed to his?

"soo...we've decided, that if you want to, when we move. We could enroll you in highschool." She finished and smiled.

I sat still, processing this information. Wait, what? I looked at dad, asking him with my thoughts if she was serious. He nodded. The excitement bubbled up and I launched myself into moms arms. "Really? Oh my god, mom. This is ganna be awsome." I squealed, and she laughed at me. I stood, and wrapped my arms around dad, thanking him repeatedly in my head. "Your welcome." He said, chuckling, but stepped back and held me still. "Know Ness, I know your excited but there's alot of things you need to learn if you want to do this. Mom and I will take care of the paper work. You will start some lessons with grandpa Carlisle, on how to be fully human. He's already stopped working at the hospital, so he'll have plenty of time to teach you." I nodded, and they left.

I laid back down on the ground, thinking about what it would be like. I knew they probably wouldn't teach me anything I didn't already know. I wasn't going to school to be smart, I was going to be normal, and I loved my parents so much for letting me.

When I glanced at Jake, he looked lost in thought, frowning. I placed my hand on his arm, trying to ignore the way his warm skin felt on mine. Whats wrong jake? I could see my question make its way into his mind. He smiled, but it didn't seem genuine. "Nothing ness, why do u ask?" I put the image of his own frown into my touch. "Its nothing Ness, im happy for you. Your ganna love it." He moved his arm away from me, placing it under his head.

"Jake, whats it like?" I asked. "What? Highschool?" I nodded. " Its been a long time since iv been there, about 7 years." He smiled. I didn't. I didn't like thinking that Jake had put his whole life one hold for me. To help raise me, to care for me. I knew he imprinted on me, and that meant we couldn't live without eachother, we wouldn't want to. But he put aside everything for me. I frowned.

"Why Jake? I mean...I know the imprint makes you stay, but why put me before everything?" I just didnt understand. He sat up, leaning half over me to look at my eyes.

"First thing, Renesmee." I paid close attention, Jake only called me bye my real name when he was serious. "The imprint, does not make me stay. Yes I didn't have control over who I imprinted on, but I wouldn't have imprinted on anyone but you. Its complicated, and I'll tell you more when your ready." I meant to protest. To tell him im not a little girl anymore. He placed his palm on my cheek. " I know your not little anymore Ness, believe me I know that. Your almost an adult, but we have forever. Dont rush it hunny. But my point is, im here cause I want to be. These years have been nothing short of amazing. Watching you grow up, become this beautiful young woman, and conquer everything in your step. I wouldn't want to be anywere but here. Okay?" All i could do was nod.

"Secoundly, I didn't put you infront of everything. I became the alpha of both pacts, I helped build the garage and work there. But you were my priority. You grew so fast I didn't wanna miss anything. I guess part of me was just...waiting for you to catch up. Soon we can be adult's together." He chuckled.

I couldn't help but feel butterflies at his words. I knew he was right, we did have forever together, and I knew better then to indulge in my crush of him so soon. But part of me loved that he was waiting for me, to grow up and be an adult with him. I smiled and nodded.

"Okay Jacob."

He smiled and leaned down. Ever since I was born he had kissed my forehead. Before bed, when he saw me, or whenever I was sad. It was a natural thing for him. But this time, his warm touch landed on my cheek, causing them to burn. "Know, why dont we go to my dads house and start packing my things?"


	5. Chapter 5: Montana

The rest of july passed normally, the heat broke. We had all of Jacob's thing's packed and the couple things from me. Mom and dad had everything sent to the new place a day ahead of us, and we would be leaving in the morning.

Jake was staying the night on the couch so we could leave in the morning. After that day in the grass his kisses returned to my forehead, but dad was starting to get suspicious, he watched me whenever I was around Jake. But I knew that jake had been right. There was no reason to rush things, and I had alot to concentrate on lately. Grandpa was giving me lessons on human etiquette. It was kind of funny, some of the things he told me.

I was worried about moving, being so far away from everything I knew. I was in my dads old room at the big house, the cottage was already packed for storage. Laying in bed, I watched out the window at the stars. A faint heartbeat down stairs was keeping me awake.

As I listened, it seemed to move, growing, till it hoverd at my door. I knew it was Jake, hesitating. Why? "Come in jake." I whisperd, turning on my side and the door cracked open. His eyes peered around for me. "Hey." He whisperd, his eyes settling on my form.

"Hi" I whisperd back.

He smiled, stepped in and closed the door. Walking quitly to my bed, standing there. "What are you diong?" I asked him, keeping my voice down. I knew anybody in the house could here us, but most of my family had gone hunting. There was just grandma and grandpa and I knew they always preserved privacy, they wouldn't be listening.

"I couldn't sleep..." He sounded like a alittle boy waking up after a bad dream. I giggled, but moved over in the large bed, patting the space besides me. He hesitated, looking at my face, but sat down, laying his body across the bed and tucking his hands under his head.

I couldn't help but admire him, he was so handsome. "Whats wrong jake?" I asked quitly, hoping he would be able to talk to me. I wanted him to see me as a grown up, as his best freind, and not his sister.

"Iv never been many places Ness. Not in human form. I guess im just alittle nervous." He breathed, and smiled, alittle sheeplishy in my direction. His eyes were glued to the celing.

"Why would u be nervous jacob? Montana's ganna love you. Ill be fighting for your attention in no time." He flashed me a greatful smile, but it didn't stay on his face. "Theres no competition...I dont know, what if I cant do business school. What if im just meant to fix cars my whole life." This was a new side jake, one I wasnt familiar with. I was thrilled that he could talk about these things with me, but I wasnt sure how to proceed. He needed me, and that was totally new.

"Jacob..do you remember when I was 3, and dad was trying to teach me trigonometry. I was so mad cause I was having trouble, and usally I could learn everything so well. I was almost in tears that day. You took me for a walk, and we sat down on this fallen tree. I remember every word you said to me.

' know listen Ness. Not everything is going to come to you, somethings will be hard, somethings will feel impossible. The important thing to do, is breath, and try harder. Somethings you have to work really hard for, but when you finally do it, its all the more amazing. Well work extra hard, and ill help you. You always have me for help. Your never alone.' And I remember, working extra hard that whole week, and bye Friday I understood everything."

His eyes seemed to shine in the moonlight, watching my every word. "know listen Jacob." I started, and he cracked a big smile. "This isnt going to be easy my Jacob. It might feel impossible, but the important thing to do, is breath, and try harder. Well work extra hard and ill help you. And it will be so amazing my jacob. You will be amazing, and you are not alone."

I smiled, hoping he could feel how much I believed in him. I always new Jacob was an amazing person, but I was just starting to realize what an incredible man he was going to be. He turned over towards me, reaching out and pulling me into his warm embrace. He hugged me tightly to his chest, and I was beyond happy to be there. " I love you Ness." He whispered. I knew I said the right thing, and I was so happy I could comfort him. " I love you, my Jacob".

He slipped out of my bed, and retreated to his couch. But before he left, he leaned down and kissed my cheek. I dreamt of Jacob that night.

In the morning, we packed the small amount of posession left, and divied into cars. Me, Jacob, mom, and dad were taking his volvo. Aunt Alice and Jasper were taking her porche, Aunt Rose was driving her bmw, Uncle Emmett had his new jeep, and grandma and grandpa had the Mercedes, mom and jacobs vehicles were being shipped. I was in the back, with my stuffed wolf on my lap, and my Jacob at my side. I was thinking about inconsequential things, mostly cause dad was in the car. Picturing my new room, Jacobs house, and wondering what he would think about it.

The long ride from forks to Montana was anoyying to say the least. In almost no time I had leaned againt Jacob, his arm on the back of the seat and passed out. My brained to seemed to know he was there, and he was the main attraction. It played scenes, mostly from my growing up, his playing with me as a baby, while mama burned upstairs. His telling mama that he didn't have a choice about the imprint. Him gaurding me, from the bad vampires. Taking me hunting, trying to convince me to eat human food, restling, arguing over minuscule things, painting my room when I wanted purple instead of pink, And always knowing what I needed. A hug, or a lecture. A lesson or a scolding. And as I grew, he always became what i needed. A brother, a freind..then what? The image's playing in my head know weren't memories, they were a diffrent quality, just dreams. Us going out to the city, having fun and eating, But it seemed to speak a diffrent language. Laying on the couch in his living room, watching tv. But instead of the casual arm thrown across the back of the sofa, I was leaning into him, and he was wrapped around me. He smiled and as his face lowerd to mine, I jolted awake. Flying up from my position at his side and looking opened eyed around the car, trying to figure out were I was.

I looked towards Jake and miraculously he was sleeping, his face against the window and his mouth hanging slightly open. My face burned as I looked towards my parents in the front seat, my dads eyes, looked back from the rear view mirror, telling me he had definitely seen my dreams. "Ness, hunny. Are you okay?" My moms voice was just whisper, but I heard her clearly. Dad just looked, seemeing to think, but not to push. I nodded, and leaned againts the other door.

I knew my dad could hear me, but I figured I had to process this. If he didnt wanna hear it, it was his own fault. Why would I have those dreams? I had dreamt of Jacob many a time, but they mostly were innocent. I knew that I had started to see him differently, but did that mean I felt differently about him? I wasnt sure. It was quiet through most of Montana, when we reached kalispell I shook Jacob awake, saying we'd be there soon. None of my nervousness seemed to even touch his good mood.

Off the main highway, we turned onto what looked like a backroad. "This road circles the town, but it doesnt see much use." Dad said, following the twists and turns with ease. At least a good 10 minutes later we turned onto an unpaved road, posted with private property signs. Just a minute up the road was a tall, iron fence, going out in both sides with a iron gate. Standing about 10 feet from the gate was a pole, with a digital notepad on it.

"We decided to do things a little differently. Usually we try to be as inconspicuous as possible, but seeing as we have you guys know, we didn't wanna have to hide away. We can all be out at any time, and Jacob there's plenty of space for you to run without a leash." Dad smirked, and jacob just laughed.

"The fence goes around the whole entire property, and its all wired. Its not electric, your mother wouldn't let me." He shot a glance at mom, who just rolled her eyes. "But its wired so if it's damaged or someone tries to break in, we'll know. The code is 91106. There are four gates, one on each side, but this is the only one with road access." He punched the code into the pad, and the iron gates swung noiseless open, letting us pass. He drove passed the gates, and continued for almost 4 miles.

The trees around us started to thin and they broke apart to a wide, open feild. With freshly cut grass, and large mature oak trees. In the front corner of the lawn was a beautiful giant willow tree, its long billowy arms stretching out, and hanging low. I knew I would love it there. The drive opened into a large circle. I pulled Jake out of the car, looking forward to the house.

"Wow." Jake said, his face in awe.

A perfect restoration of a 1800 hundred colonial house. It was a grand three story white house, with a wrap around porch on the first floor, white circle columns spaced evenly around the banister supporting the secound story wrap around porch.

"know Renesmee, I know Esme has shown you the plans. But I want to make sure you know some key points. Around the house on the left hand side, is the entrance to the sunken garage. It has five garage doors, and plenty of space for vehicles. The first floor is the grand room, the kitchen and dining room, and Carlisle and esme's bedroom. Secound floor is Nessies, your's mothers and I, and Carlisle's studys. Third floor is Rose and Emmets and Alice and Jaspers rooms." I saw Jacob's face frown, wondering im sure were his room was. I smiled

"okay daddy. Come on Jake." I took his hand, pulling him up the front steps and to the large wide white oak door. Grandma had stuck to there favored white and creams throughout most of the house. We walked the first floor, heading upstairs and following the hallway.

"Mom and dads room, grandpas study, and my room."

I opened the door, walking into my new bedroom. The walls were painted forest green, with white borders. I had dark harwood floors, and a white throw rug took up the main spot. Grandma and I had picked out a beautiful white antique oak wooden bedroom set. My gueen sized bed was placed headboard first against the west wall with my door. My bathroom and closet were on the south wall, with my dresser placed between them. My jewelry box sitting on top. Large windows lined the east, around the corner and onto the north. Grandma had a beautiful window seat placed under the east window. In the corner facing the windows was my painting set up. Along the north wall was a white wooden desk, with a labtop. Beside that was a bookcase, filled from top to bottem with my favorite books. I was in awe how everything had come together so perfectly. My closet was already stocked, and my ensuite bathroom was breathtaking. It had a long row of counters, a large walk in shower and a sunken tub that could fit two.

"Grandma out did here self Jacob. Isnt this perfect?" He was quite, watching me take everything in. " Its great Ness, did u help her with it?" I smiled hugely, proud of myself. " I did, she let me pick out the colors and some of the furniture." "well, its amazing. Nice job." He said smiling.

I grabbed his hand, pulling him from the room. "Just wait till you see yours." I said. I was nervous as i pulled him along. I was fairly certain he would like it, but I could be wrong. We walked throught the glass back door that opened into the backyard.

"Theres a pool? Thats awesome." He sounded so excited.

"Yup, it gets pretty hot here in the summer."

We headed to the right, towards the 'pool house'. "Whats this for?" He asked. I laughed, opening the door and pulling him in.

It opened into the living room on the right, and his kitchen on the left. It wasn't grand like the big house, it was more cozy and warm, like jacob. There was a large leather couch, and a big flat screen tv. The kitchen was fully funtioning with his own fridge, oven, microwave and island. He had the same hardwood floors as me, and the walls were light brown. I pulled him down the hallway. "This is the spare room incase anybody from the rez wants to come up and stay." We peaked into the room, it had the same flooring and color, a door leading to a bathroom and a bed and dresser.

I glanced at jacob, his mouth was hanging open, and he was speachless. I pulled him to the other door, opening it and letting him in. The floor continued, but his walls were painted forest green, the same shade as mine. His bathroom door was on the north wall with the main door, the west held his dresser with his few possession ontop, and near the corner his desk, with a labtop sitting on top. Along the south wall was windows, opening his room to the lawn. The east wall had his bed, a kind size with dark wood and blue covers. He had a glass door leading out to a little patteo, with a tall white fence that wrapped around one corner, blocking it from the big house. Light wicker furniture dotted around the patteo.

He wondered around the room, picking up his trinkets. " This is mine?"

" Yes my Jacob, this is yours." I said, laughing alittle." Everybody decided that you deserved your own spot. You should be comfortable in your own home..and, I wanted to thank you. For coming with me. I knew if it wasnt for me you wouldn't leave your home, so thank you." He walked over, wrapping his big arms around my small waist, lifted me and hugged me tight.

"Your incredible, you know that?" I blushed and laughed. "It was mostly grandma, I just helped." He put me down, and continued exploring, walking into the bathroom.

"This bathroom is twice the size of my old room." Laughing I sat on his bed, looking out the window. "Hey jake, come here." I pointed to the secound story. "Thats my room, right there." From this angle you couldn't really see into the room, just the windows and ceiling. But I knew from mine I could see down into his. "Thats pretty cool. This is incredible Ness, thank you." He kissed my cheek. We spent the rest of the day exploring the property, and grandma made us a 'welcome home' dinner.


	6. Chapter 6: School

We settled into the new house, and Jacob started his online schooling. He said it was pretty easy so far, he had never been bad at school, but once he changed it just didnt matter to him.

I was proud, that he was finishing highschool. I myself was terrified to start. School started tomorrow, and my birthday was just over a week away. As excited as I was, I couldnt sleep.

Nerves ran through me, what if they saw I was different? What if no one liked me? What if I made no friends? I couldnt stay still, pacing my room. My school outfit was hanging on my closet door, a white button shirt, black skirt, black blazer, and black tie. I was to attend summit prepotory school. While it was classified as a public school, they required a school uniform.

I went back to pacing. There was heavy footsteps and a soft knock on my door. I sighed and slumped across my bed. "Come in jacob." The door opened and he stepped in, closing it behind him. His smile was gentle. "Hey." He said, sitting next to me on the bed. "Hi.." I whisperd. "You okay?" He stroked my hair. " I'm nervous Jacob. Maybe I shouldn't do this. Maybe I should just stay here."

"That doesn't sound like my Ness. You've never been afraid of anything. Its normal to be nervous, but you can't let that stop you. Your ganna go to school, and blow them all away. There going to love you, and your ganna love going. I promise." My Jacob always new how to make me feel better. I hugged him tightly.

"Now, you need to get some sleep." He stood up, pulling my covers down, and I crawled under them. He pulled the blanket up, and kissed my forehead. "I'll see you in the morning." He left, closing the door behind him.

I woke early in the morning,showering and drying my hair into neat curls, adding a headband. I changed into my uniform, put on my necklace from jacob and went through my school bag. I made my way downstairs, and grandma was in the kitchen, making breakfast. I sat at the island, and mom and dad joined us.

"Are you nervous?" Mom asked. " A little but im excited." "Well.." Dad said. "We figured since you were going out into the world without us you might need this." He smiled, and in his hand was a cell phone. " Its an iphone, and everybody's number is programmed in already." I took it from him, unlocking it and scrolling throught the phone. "Thank you daddy." I smiled.

Grandma placed two plates on the table, and just like he had been called Jacob strolled through the door, heading straight for his food. I laughed. "Perfect timing Jake, does your nose tell you when to get up?"

"Ha ha, im hungry."

He stuck his tongue out and started shoveling food into his mouth. I ate mine, talking with mom about school. She reminded me to call her Bella, and dad Edward in public, and grandpa and grandma were Mom and Dad. Jake was a family freind. They had gotten all my paperwork and schedule for me, along with a map of the school. I had already memorized my classes and route so i wouldn't have to look at it.

"Alright, who's driving me?" Jacob swallowed his last bite, taking are plates and putting them in the sink. "That would be me, are you ready?"

"Yup." I said, grabbing my bag and hugging everyone on my way out. They all wished me a good first day and we were off.

The school was almost an hour away, which gave me time to become nervous again. "Whats your schedule?" He asked, im sure to distract me. "History, algebra, health, biology, lunch, art, and foreign languages." I was being enrolled as a sophomore, because of my previous homeschooling. "Thats a pretty full schedule, im sure you'll school your teacher's." He winked and I blushed.

We pulled up to the school, and he parked. "You have your bag and your cell?" I nodded. "If you need me, you have my number. I'm just a txt away. You'll do great Nessie, I promise. I'll pick you up here after." He kissed my forehead and gave me an encouraging smile.

I stepped out, following my mental map to history. I was one of the first people in the room, and sat in the corner, waiting for class to start. You could tell everybody knew eachother, all around me I heard my classmates human voices, asking how was your summer? and we have to do this! and did you hear this?

The bell rang and the teacher stood up, calling everyone to attention. He introduced himself as Mr. White. Which was kind of ironic since he was so old his hair and beard where white. As he started his speech on history and are syllables a girl came hurdling throught the door, stopping short when she noticed the class had started and blushing. She was tall, with strawberry blonde hair, her glasses sliding down her nose and her clothes were a skew. She rushed over to the last seat, right next to me. The teacher started back up and passed out forms for us to fill out. I started mine, going through the questions.

"psst...pssttt." I glanced over, and the girl was leaning towards me. "Do you have a pencil?" She whisperd. I laughed and handed her one. She wasn't very organized. Class passed quickly and the bell rang. I gatherd my thing's, putting everything away.

"Hi, thanks for the pencil. Im Ally." She stuck her hand out, and I shook it. "Renesmee, but you can call me Ness.."

"Renesmee, I like that. Never seen you here before, you must be knew. I know everything about this school, so if u have any questions go ahead and ask. I'd say im not usally late but thats a lie. Whats your next class?" She reminded me of Aunt Alice, bouncing from one question to another.

I liked her, she was interesting. "Algebra I believe." I said, standing and heading towards the door. "Thats awsome! Me to. We can walk together."

We made are way to class, Ally talking at full speed the whole way. We sat together, her whispering, asking me questions. We had health together also, parting ways after and I headed toward biology. So far classes were easy, nothing new to learn, but it was fascinating watching the kids around me.

At the end of class I looked up to see a tall blonde pretty looking boy approach. "Hi there. Your Ness right? Im Brad." He smiled and I could tell this boy was use to getting his way.

"Hello." I said to be polite. I started toward to the door, and he followed. "Hey wait up, I'll walk with you to lunch." I didn't wanna be rude, so I let him. "Your new around here, arent ya?"

"Yes, I moved here with my family." I said. We walked towards the cafe, and I started to feel uncomfortable. "Soo, Ness. Do you have a boyfriend?" He asked.

I was about to say it was none of his business when something came running up to me. "Oh hell no you dont. Brad, stay away from her. I mean it." Ally practically growled at him and pulled me away, along side her into the lunch line. I sighed, relieved. "Thank you for that."

"Dont worry about it. All that boy wants is to get in your pants. Trust me, I fell for that one."

"Get in my pants?" I said, unfamiliar with the fraze.

"Ya, ya know? Sleep with you? Have sex." I blushed. "Ohh." I wasn't so use to the term being tossed around in normal conversation. "Oh sweet jesus. We have a blusher." She laughed, leading me over to an empty table.

" Iv just never heard that fraze before. I was home schooled soo..."

"Oh hunny, your to precious for this world. Stick with me."

We ate are lunch, and learned we had art and foriegn language togather. Like me, she was a lover of art, but favored drawing more then paint. We got along really well, and I loved her personality.

The rest of the day passed quickly, and I was happy with how it turned out. We were leaving the building, heading to the parking lot. "Omg, I almost forgot. Give me your phone." I handed it over, and she took a picture of herself, programming it to her number. "Here, know we can get ahold of eachother." I laughed, taking my phone back. "Send me something so I have yours." I laughed and took a picture of myself, sending it to her. "Nice, thats a keeper."

We rounded a corner, and she stopped. "Holy shit, who is that and how do I make him mine." I looked at who she was looking at, and smiled. Jacob was leaning against his car,wearing jeans and t shirt. "That. Is jacob. He moved with us, he's a family freind." I said, waving towards him.

"So are you guys like togather?" She asked. I wasnt really sure how to respond. Not yet but were destined to be. "Umm..not really." I said. She raised an eyebrow and gave me a ahuh look. "Alright then..ill see you tomorrow." She said, walking off." Dont be late." I called back. She laughed and I headed towards Jacob.

"How was your day?" He opened my door for me, closed it and sliding in his spot. "It was really good, I made a freind. Her name is Ally. She's...interesting." I laughed, that was an understatement.

We chatted about his day while he drove, and I listened. I loved when he talked, he always held this tone of importance. Like no matter what he said it was vital. We made it home and he followed me upstairs, lounging on my bed and I ducked into my bathroom, changing out of my uniform. I put on some shorts, and a black tshirt I had at some point stolen from Jacob. I giggled as I made my way out, and he glared playfully at the shirt.

He watched quietly while I painted at my easel, turning it away from him as a suprise. From the moment I walked out and he was sprawled across my bed he looked so peaceful, so Jacob. So I turned it from him and began painting. I concentrated hard on him, trying to paint the contours of his body. I blushed alittle, wondering if it was wrong, to admire his form so much. He was handsome, and there was frankly no way around it. His dark tan skin, his strong jaw. The painting centered on him, widening out to my bed, and faded around the edges the farther it got.

My eyes flashed to his, and they were dark, swimming with thoughts and emotions. I smiled, leaning around it. "Do you want to see it?" I asked.

He nodded slowly, clearing his throat. "Y-yes." His voice was low and gruff. He scooted off the bed, walking the couple feet to me and stopped bye my side. He was silent, staring at my portrait. I started to worry, maybe he didn't like it. Maybe it was to personal? He was fully clothed, even wearing a shirt this time so it wasn't inappropriate.

I was just going to ask him if he didn't like it, when he wrapped his strong arms around me and pulled me to him. I laughed alittle.

"So you like it?"

"Ya Ness, i love it." I grinned at that.

" I think its one of my favorites." I said, happily. "Come on. Lets go see if grandma's making dinner." I grabbed his hand, pulling him out of my room and down stairs.

Grandma was in the kitchen, making Italian food. One of the foods prefer. The older I got, the more food exposure I got. There was some foods that still repulsed me, most vegetables and i wasn't big on red meat. But I had a sweet tooth when it came to human food, and a love of spicy foods. I still hunted with my parents and Jacob, I went usally once a week. But I knew Jacob preferd human food, so I ate with him most days.

"Hello grandma." I greeted, sitting at the island. She smiled lovingly at us.

"Jacob, Ness dear. How was your day?"

"It was good, I did a new painting. Id like to hang it on my wall if that's alright?" I asked, to be polite. I knew she would never say no.

"Of course dear, ill do it while you eat."

My family began to wonder in as she spoke, mom and dad coming to stand bye me, Emmett and Rosalie sitting bye the table, and Alice and Jasper where near the door, talking to themselves. Grandpa came home and kissed grandmas cheek and stood bye her. We got are food and Jacob started inhaling it. I rolled my eyes, and started eating. They all wanted to know about my first day at school, so I went over it, skipping some small inappropriate details but they were pleased, so I was happy.

Dinner was finished and I declared myself tired. Jacob headed out to his own place, and I went upstairs. I was surprised, to see my painting hanging on the south wall, between my bathroom and closet doors over my dresser. Of course it was the perfect spot for it, I just hadn't seen grandma sneak off. There was a little sticky note on the corner, and in her elegent script it read _it's magnificent, good job Nessie_. I smiled hugely, peeling the note of the picture carefully and sticky it to my dresser. I crawled into bed, tired from my first day and fell asleep quickly.


	7. Chapter 7: His Point

A/N: Hello lovely readers. Were changing things up alittle here. Let me know what you think about this chapter. I wanted to grasp the deference between the way Renesmee sees things and the way Jacob does. I do plan on having some more of Jacob's pov throughout the story but will be mainly Ness. I would love to see what ya'll think, leave a review and make my day!

* * *

I stood, pacing the space between my living room and kitchen. Back, and forth. Back, and forth. Why was I pacing? I had no clue. But a part of me was nervous..no, not me. I relized it wasn't me who was nervous, it was the part of me that felt her. What she felt and what she needed, and right know she was nervous.

Before Ness, I would of never belived the imprint could be such an all powerful things. I felt her, all the time. Happy, sad, mad. I knew when she needed me, and instinctively I knew what to do. It was easy when she was young, to comfort her. When she got older and more mature, it was alittle more tricky.

I left, making my way across the lawn and towards the back door, up the stairs and to her room. I could hear her steady heart, and slow breathing, but I knew she was up. I knocked quietly, listening.

"Come in Jacob."

Her sweet voice came from the other side. I cracked the door, stepping in and finding her. She was sprawled on her bed, her hair tangled around her. She was wearing pjs, long pants and a t-shirt. Her uniform was hanging on her closet door. It made me uneasy, seeing it. Imagining her in school in it around all those guys. The jealousy poked it's nasty head out and I beat it back.

"Hey" I said, smiling at her, she looked so worried. I appraised her face, it's delicate features. She was beautiful, and I didn't want to let her out of my sight, ever. I knew how guys thought, hell I'd been having some trouble with it latly. Her birthday was in a little more then a week, and the closer it came the more anxious I got.

"Hi." She whisperd.

I sat next to her, laying my hand on her silky hair and running my fingers through it. "You okay?" I knew she wasn't, but I didn't want to push her.

"Im nervous Jacob. Maybe I shouldn't do this. Maybe I should just stay here." She sounded on the edge of a breakdown. My Ness was always strong, always taking everything so well.

"That doesn't sound like my Ness. You've never been afraid of anything. It's normal to be nervous, but you can't let that stop you. Your ganna go to school, and blow them all away. There ganna love you, and your ganna love going. I promise." I knew I was right, anybody who met Ness couldn't help but love her. She was a gravitational force, with me beside her. That was exactly my problem. My Ness was innocent and sweet. She saw the best in people and trusted with everything she was. She was also stunningly beautiful. Her big brown eyes froze you in place. Her soft curly bronze hair framed her perfect face, running wildly down her back. She was almost full grown, with the body of a woman. I stopped my thoughts their, now was not the time.

She smiled hugely, flashing her perfect white teeth. She leaned up, wrapping her slender arms around my neck and pressing into me. She was soft and warm and I held her tightly to me. "Know, you need to get some sleep." I said, pulling away from her and getting up. I pulled her covers down and she smiled, getting on her hands and knees and crawling to the top. Oh lord.

I pulled them up, covering her and kissed her forehead."Ill see you in the morning." I left, heading to my place. It was confusing, feeling this way. I had helped raise her, played with her as a toddler, sneaked her cookies when bella said no. That was, what? four years ago, and her she was. Grown up and almost an adult. She was turning 7, but she could pull of being 20.

I slumped onto my bed, glancing up at her window. I knew some part of it was different, turning into something else. But I was terrified, and not ready for that, so I would ignore it. I pulled my jeans off, tossing my shirt to the floor and laid in bed in my boxers. I was outcold in minutes.

I woke the next morning, the smell of bacon and eggs reaching me and my stomach grumbled. I changed, heading to the big house. I pulled the door open and my eyes fell directly on her. She looked incredible, I noticed Bella and Edward beside her. Dont think about her skirt, I told myself, and Edward eyed me. Dammit. I beelined for my food, peeling my eyes from her legs.

"Perfect timing Jake, does your nose tell you when to get up?" She asked, wasn't wrong.

"Ha ha, im hungry."

I stuck my tongue out and started shoveling food into my mouth. I listened while she talked with Bella, trying to keep my mind off of her. I knew Edward knew that I was starting to notice her, but thankfully he didnt seem too botherd bye it.

"Alright, whos driving me?" I swallowed my last bite, getting up and taking are plates and putting them in the sink. "That would be me, are you ready?" I said, facing her. She stood up, and grabbed her bag. "Yup." She said, turning and hugging everybody goodbye.

We headed outside, getting into my car and winding down the road. The school was almost an hour away, and I could feel her energy, getting tigher and tigher.

"Whats your schedule?" I asked, hoping to distract her.

"History, algebra, health, biology, lunch, art, and foreign languages." She said.

I knew my Ness was incredibly smart. She could walk circles around me when it comes to smarts. I also knew that she didn't need highschool, she was smarter then anyone there."Thats a pretty full schedule, I'm sure you'll school your teachers." I winked and she blushed.

We pulled up to the school, and I parked. "You have your bag and your cell?" She nodded. " If you need me, you have my number. Im just a txt away. You'll do great Nessie, I promis. Ill pick u up here after." I kissed her forehead and gave her an encouraging smile. It was hard for me to let her go, to not be there to protect her. But I knew that she needed this, she had to make her own experiences.

She stepped out, shutting the door and walking away. I watched her leave, until she reached the building and disappeared. I watched, as heads turned to her when she passed. She oblivious, to how incredible she was. I sighed, and pulled out. Heading back to the house. I needed to clear my head and concentrate, if I was ever going to get any work done.

I got home and headed to the woods, stripping and letting the heat roll through me. I landed, on four paws. It was quiet, in my mind, no one was changed. It was always easier to clear my head as a wolf, it was more animalistic, more instinctual. My wolf ran on simple desires, fundamental values. Hunger, sleep, love, want. It wasn't as complicated as my human form.

I worked on school later, sitting on the labtop and drowned through it. I knew it was neccessary, to finish. If I wanted to make a life for Ness one day I had to be able to proved for her, that meant getting my diploma. The shop was running fairly well, none of us had expected it to do so good, and we weren't prepared for how busy it had gotten. There was plenty of guys on the rez that needed the work, the problem was we weren't experienced enough to handle the business end of it. We talked about hiring someone, but it was such a pack place we were nervous to bring in an outsider. When Ness got older I started to think about the future, realizing that she was growing up, and somehow I wasn't. She started to pass me in so many ways, that was when it hit me. So I decided it was time to finish growing up, and I talked to the guys about going to business school. They thought it was a great idea and supported me. I looked into it, it would take two years to get a general business degree, after I finished highschool. I had alot of online courses I had to do if I wanted to finish within the year.

I left earlier then I needed too, to pick her up. I was getting anxious with her so far away, so I sat in the parking lot, stretching out my hearing trying to listen for her, but there were to many kids. The bell rang and I got out, leaning on the door and waiting. I picked up her heartbeat just as she walked around the corner, and a tall strawberry blonde girl at her side. My heart constricted in my chest, wanting to be closer to her. They stopped, and her warm eyes found me. Her face split into a wide grin, and I could hear her responce. "That. Is jacob. He moved with us, he's a family freind." She said, waving towards me. I was impatient, I wanted her close to me, but I didn't want to interrupt.

"So are you guys like togather?" The other girl asked her. I could see her eyes glance over to me. She looked confused, which I understood. How do you tell some one well, he imprinted on me so, one day we will. "Umm..not really." She said. "Alright then..ill see you tomorrow." The girl said, and walked off. "Dont be late." Ness called back, laughing. She turned back to me and I smiled.

"How was your day?" I asked, opening the door for her. I closed it and walked around to my side, getting in. "It was really good, I made a freind. Her name is Ally. She's...interesting." I was glad she met someone, I knew that she was worried she wouldn't make any freinds.

She asked me about my day, while i drove and she was quite, listening. It always amazed me how she always listening so well when i talked. I always had her undevided attention. We made it home and I followed her upstairs, after not seeing her all day i wasn't going to let her out of my sight. I lounging across her bed and she disapeared into the bathroom. I streched, laying my long legs out before me and tucking my arms behind my head. She stepped out, wearing cotton shorts a black tshirt, i narrowed my eyes at her, i recognize the shirt. I didn'tknow when, but she had definitely stolen it from me. She knew i wasnt mad, cause she laughed.

She took on long look at me and walked to her easel, swiveling it around and she stood behind it, facing me. She studied me quitly and I could see her thoughts racing bye on her face. I knew in that moment i was going to be her subject so i made myself comfortable and froze.

I watched quietly while she painted. She had her look of utter concentration, her chocolate brown eyes shone brightly, excited. She had the tinest smile on her lips, and gazed flicked back and forth, from me to canvas. I couldn't help myself as my eyes traveld the length of her. I knew she was grown up, almost an adult. Physically at least, and i knew that part of me was starting to notice that. She looked incredible, in my shirt. It was large, hanging slightly off her shoulder and i could see her white bra strap underneath. My eyes moved farther, down her slim waist. She had my shirt in a knot at her hip, keeping it from dangling down her thighs. There was inch of her creamy skin exposed of her hip before her shorts started. Down her long, glorious legs. She was barefoot, and had a dark green painted on her toes. My eyes fell on her face again, and she was staring at me. Her bottom lip was between her teeth, and her eyes seemed to be on my chest. Like i was diong to her moments ago, they traveled up my chest, and across my broad shoulders. She nodded slighly to herself, as if saying she had gotten it right and her eyes found mine. She blushed, but smiled pleased at something.

"Do you want to see it?" She asked. I tried to pull my thoughts together, pushing her body from my mind and cleared my throat. "Y-yes." My voice was low and cracked. I slid of the bed, walking to her side and turned to face her painting. I was shocked into silence.

There was a man, strong and proud, streched out comfortable on a bed. He had rich tan skin, muscles layerd one after another, covering his body. Even under the black tshirt he wore you could see his broad chest. His face was hard, but somehow soft. He had strong facial features, and a square jaw. The painting centered on him, widening out to around the bed, and faded around the edges the farther it got.

Was This me? I Recognized my face in the picture. My clothes, and my eyes. But this..this image was something completely diffrent. This man demanded respect, it screamed alpha and he wouldn't except anything less. This image of me, this was the way she perceived me. Strong and proud, but I could also see it in the face, the softness there that was only for her. The love and affection shone from his eyes. My eyes.

Overehelmed, i turned towards her pulled her to me, pressing her tightly into me. She gave a startled laughed.

"So you like it?"

"Ya Ness, i love it." I said. I couldn't fully express how very much this picture meant to me. I wish in that moment that I could have her gift, and show her.

"I think its one of my favorites." She said, happily. "Come on. Lets go see if grandma's making dinner." She grabbed my hand, pulling me out all the way downstairs. I dont think she relized that she sharing her happiness throught are touch.

Esme was in the kitchen, making Italian food. It was one of nessies favorites.

"Hello grandma." She said, sitting at the island. I joined her, scooting closer to feel her near me

"Jacob, Ness dear. How was your day?"

"It was good, I did a new painting. Id like to hang it on my wall if thats alright?" She asked, and i was instantly thrilled. She wanted me on her wall.

"Of course dear, ill do it while you eat."

Edward and Bella strolled in, standing next to ness and everybody followed suit. I cleared my head, pushing her and the picture out of focuse for know. Esme placed are food on the table and it smelled soo good i started inhaling it. Everybody asked Ness questions while we ate, about school and the freind she had made.

We finsihed eating and I parted ways, heading to my place. I laid in bed that night, thinking about her painting. Could she feel it to? This small change to are relationship? I wasn't sure how far it went on my end, sure i was noticing her physically, but was it more then that? I wasn't sure..


	8. Chapter 8: All Grown up

My first week of school passed with no incidents and I quickly learned that Ally was short of amazing. She was funny and completely inappropriate, and it made school that much better. Monday came and we were sitting at lunch, with a couple of her friends.

"Whats up Ness, your quiet today?" She said, turning towards me. I thought about how to say it. It was a tricky line, to walk, among human and supernatural. "Its my birthday tomorrow." I said, she looked confused. "That's awesome, why do u seem upset?"

"Well, in my family birthday's are a big thing. Its...important." It was my seventh birthday, I would be fully grown. After today I would never change. "Dont worry about it Ness, its just a birthday." She smiled and I nodded. Somethings she would never be able to understand.

I was eating dinner with Jake that night, my family surrounding us." Do you wanna stay home from school tomorrow?" Mom asked me. I knew she was just trying to make me happy, but that was the last thing I wanted. "No, I dont wanna make a big deal of it." She nodded and I could see dad's face, concerned.

I turned in early that night, to worked up to hang around with my family. I had never really thought about how I would feel when the time came, growing up I was always excited. To be an adult, to stop growing. Everytime I got use to one thing, something else changed. It all happened so fast, and know I was scared of what would happen.

I tried to keep myself busy, working on my painting, and homework. When I became to antsy I paced. I passed my closet, pulling the door open and revealing the full body mirror on the back. I stared at myself, nervous. Frozen forever as I was. My body had filled out more over the past year. I was tall and slender, but curvy. My hair long and curly. What would happen when I stopped aging? Would I be completely frozen, like mom? Would I stop getting a period? would I never be able to carry a baby? These questions flew through my head, never ending. What happend if one day in the future Jacob wanted kids, and I couldn't give him that. Would he resent me? Would I resent me?

I sat on my bed, I couldn't stand looking at my reflection anymore. I curled my legs up and wrapped my arms around them. Folding myself into a ball, and wallowing. I felt Jacob near me, felt the imprint telling me he was close. My door creaked, and his head peaked around the corner. One look at me and he shut the door, sitting on my bed and pulling me close to him.

"Whats wrong Nessie?" He asked quietly. I wasn't really sure what to say. I put my hand on his arm, letting my emotions flow into him. I kept the part about him wanting kids to myself, but let the fear of not being able to have them out. Thinking all my fears and sharing them with him did help some, make me feel a little less chaotic.

"Oh hunny." His voice was soothing. "This is it jacob, I'll never change." My voice was small, scared. "That doesn't matter Ness, none of it matters. We are soo lucky. We get to live forever. You get to keep your parents, and me and we never have to grow old and die. The other stuff we'll figure out later." His words did make me feel better. There wasn't anything I could do to change anything. It was unavoidable. "And beside's, I think your pretty perfect the way you are." He said, grinning his Jacoby grin. I laughed and hugged him to me. " Thank you my jacob." He kissed my forehead, and sat with me for while. I wasn't sure when but eventually I fell asleep.

I woke in the morning, alone. I followed my normal schedule, showering and getting ready for school, I put on my necklace from Jacob. I didn't feel any different, I didn't look any different from last night. I went downstairs, meeting grandma for breakfast. "Good morning sweetheart, and happy birthday." She said, kissing my forehead and handing me food. "Goodmorning grandma, and thank you." I felt better this morning, happier. The kitchen filled with my family members. Mom kissed my forehead and dad hugged me tightly. Everybody was happy, but a little sad.

Jacob came in, kissing the side of my head." Happy birthday." He whispered. Grandma handed him a plate of food taking a plate of food and he took it, devouring it. I glanced at him, and laughed. "Do you breathe when u eat?" I said. Everybody laughed, but he just shrugged. Aunt Rose walked in, took one look at Jacob and made a distuged face. "Dogs don't breathe Ness, they pant." Emmett came in behind her, laughing. "At least he's not humping anyone's leg." I snorted into my toast, and took a sip of milk. Jacob flipped off Emmett, but otherwise ignored him and continued eating. "Alright, I gatta go to school, are u driving me?" I asked him. "Ya, I'm coming." He grabbed are plates, handing them to grandma. "Thank you esme." She patted his cheek lovingly.

We left the house, winding are way down the street." How are you diong Nessie?" He asked. I felt a little embarrassed about my melt down. "Im better. I'm sorry I was such a mess last night."

"Dont be sorry, you have every right to freak out. Everybody has bad days Ness."

"I guess, everything just kinda...crashed down..thank you, bye the way. If u didn't come see me im not sure were that would of ended." He smiled and grabbed my hand.

"You don't have to thank me Ness. I knew you needed me. I always know...and about last night..Just because you stopped aging doesn't mean you won't have that one day, you'r still half human hunny, it could happen. But either way, it wouldn't change anything." I blushed when I relized what he was talking about. He always knew me so well, he could tell what I was really afraid of.

We pulled into the lot, parking. "Thank you Jacob..really." I leaned up and kissed his hot cheek. Grabbing my bag and opening the door, I started toward the building.

I was barly a foot away when Ally came crashing down on me, throwing me into a hug and saying in a singsong voice "Happyy birthdaayyyyy." I shushed her, planting my hand over her mouth. She laughed, pulling me toward's the school.

"Soooo, get a good a present from Jake yet?" She winked, causing me to blush. She was constantly making comments about him, and somehow she knew about my crush. "ha ha, no. Know shut up and lets get to class. " We made are way to history, taking are seats and the teacher started on his long boring lecture.

I was spacing, when my phone buzzed in my pocket. I glanced at the screen, and rolled my eyes when I saw Ally's face on it. **WHY WON'T YOU JUST ADMITE YOU LIKE HIM? WHO WOULDN'T, HES GORGEOUS!- ALLY.**

I glanced at the teacher, completely oblivious to the student's. **WHY WON'T YOU JUST LET IT GO? -NESS.**

 **BECAUSE WERE SUPPOSE TO BE FRIENDS :( I PROMISE I WON'T TELL.-ALLY** I sighed, wondering if it would make a difference.

 **FINE..ITS COMPLICATED.-NESS.**

 **COMPLICATED HOW?-ALLY.**

I tried to think of a natural way to word this, anti supernatural. **WELL...THERE'S SOMETHING THERE, BUT HE THINKS IM TO YOUNGE AND WANTS TO WAIT.-NESS**. There, that was pretty close to the truth. **THAT'S STUPID, SO U BASICALLY HAVE TO WAIT? WHAT IF YOU DONT WANT TO, THERE'S PLENTY OF FISH IN THE SEA ;) -ALLY.** I snorted, covering it with a cough. **I DONT WANT ANYBODY ELSE. JACOB AND I..WE HAVE A CONNECTION. I DONT REALLY MIND WAITING, I HAVE TIME.-NESS.**

 **WELL IN THE MEAN TIME HES GREAT EYE CANDY-ALLY.** I laughed, grabbing the attention of the teacher and blushing. **I ALMOST FORGOT. I GOT YOU A PRESENT!-ALLY.** I glanced at her, feeling apprehensive. **SHOULD I BE SCARED?-NESS.** She giggled next to me. **VERY-ALLY.**

Class ended and we made our way to health. Sitting in the corner, we still had a couple minutes till the bell rang. Ally turned her chair towards me, blocking the sight of the class. She had a Mischievous look on her face and I was very, very scared. She ducked her head, whispering to me. "I figured since you were home schooled it was time for you to learn about these things. Every woman should have this book." She glanced around, and pulled a book from her bag. It was hot pink and black, and the tittle read Sex Education for Woman.

I blushed deep red, ducking my head. "Dont we cover this in class?" I whisperd. She laughed. "Oh this isn't a..school appropriate book. Every woman has the right to learn about whats in this book. Your welcome." She shoved it in my hands, and I tried to protest. "Ness, im not taking it back. Just think of it like, preparing for later." She winked and the bell rang. I panicked, shoving the book into my bag and looking over my shoulder. She was grinning, clearly enjoying my torture.

We sat at the lunch table, talking about her gym class last period, mom had gotten me out of gym with a note from grandpa. My cell buzzed, and I looked at it **. HOWS YOUR DAY GOING?-JACOB.** I smiled, and texted back **. PRETTY GOOD ACTUALLY, YOURS?-NESS.** Ally looked over at me, noticing my phone and rolling her eyes. I just grinned back. **KINDA WEIRD ACTUALLY, WAS IN THE GARAGE WORKING ON MY BIKE AND ALICE CAME IN, TOLD ME TO TELL YOU TO ACCEPT THE GIFT? SAID IT WOULD COME IN HANDY?-JACOB.** My mouth dropped and my face flamed beat red.

Thank god Ally wasn't watching me anymore. My brain studdard, drawing a blank response. **WHAT GIFT IS SHE TALKING ABOUT?-JACOB**. I thought of something to tell him **. JUST SOMETHING ALLY GAVE ME, TRUST ME WHEN I SAY YOU DONT WANNA KNOW.-NESS.** I prayed he would let it go. **WELL KNOW I DEFINITELY WANNA KNOW, TELL ME-JACOB.** I was ganna kill aunt Alice **. JUST A BOOK, NOTHING SPECIAL.-NESS.**

 **YOU KNOW I CAN TELL WHEN YOUR LYING.-JACOB.**

 **GATTA GET TO CLASS, SEE YOU LATER.-NESS**

I was definitely a chicken, what was I ganna do? On the way to art I tried to talk Ally into taking it back. "look, I really appreciate it and all but I really do-" "Im not taking it back." " But All-" "Nope. You'll thank me one day." She sat down and I sighed. There was no getting ride of it.

School finished and we were heading to parking lot, Ally chattering about the stuck up girls in school. Jake was there, leaning against his car, looking to good for his own good. A group of the 'popular' girls stood a couple feet from him, staring and giggling. Jealousy flared up in me, and I stocked over towards him, Ally following close bye.

He noticed me right away, probably sensing my irritation. Pushing off from his car he took a couple steps toward me, wrapping me in a hug. He turned his back towards the group, setting me down and glancing at Ally. I blushed, forgetting she was there. "Oh. Jacob, this is Ally. Ally, Jacob." She smiled, sticking out her hand and shaking his. "So your Jacob. Iv heard alot about you, its nice to finally meet you." She turned towards me, ducking her head. "Your soo going to need that book." She whisperd, but I knew that Jacob could hear. I blushed, and bumped her shoulder,giving her a shut the hell up face. She just laughed. "Well i gatta go, see you tomorrow Ness, bye Jacob." She winked and went off in a different direction.

He was looking at me, his eyebrow raised with a you ganna tell me what that meant? Look on his face. I walked around him, climbing in the car. He followed, started the engine and pulled out. "So. You ganna tell me yet?" I persed my lips. "No, and I dont think dad should know so dont think about it." Miraculously, he let it drop. I cleared it from my mind, a technique aunt Alice had tough me to irritate dad. We made it home, and Jacob had work to do so I made my way up stairs, changing out of my school uniform and going towards my easel.

About an hour later mom had wondered into my room, watching me paint. "How was school sweetheart?" My mind flashed to Ally, and I tried to block it out. I listened, trying to hear who was in the house. She lifted a perfect arched brow. "Is dad home?" She smiled, knowingly. "Hes out with Jasper,said he wont be home till dinner." I relaxed, playing my day back in my head. I blushed, remembering it. I knew my mom would find it amusing. In so many ways she was much younger then everybody else in the house, not as...old fashioned. I placed my hand on her cheek, replaying my day. I was right, her windchime laugh filled the air and she looked toward my bag. I took the book out, handing it to her. "Im going to kill aunt Alice." I said mater a factly. She peered at it, flipping through some chapters. "You know, this is actually pretty good. Its not as bad as you would imagine, its not dirty, just informative. Its more...this century." She said, still going throught it. "Ya, and know Jacob wants to know. " she giggled, and I rolled my eyes. "All im saying, is it might be a good idea to flip through it." " oh ya, Im sure dad would love that." She smiled " I actually wanted to take to you about that, your dad told me he's been..hearing some things latly?" I blushed. " I'm not suprised, hes an incredible man. Your father and I relize how grown up you are, and we're letting you make decision's for yourself. So whatever happens, we won't stand in the way, we just want to remind you that you have a very long time ahead of you hunny, so dont rush things." She smiled, handing my book to me and winked, walking out.

I put it on my bookshelf with the rest, no one came into my room so they wouldn't see it. I went downstairs, asking grandma if she wanted help. She was teaching me slowly how to make some meals, and tonight was steak and potatoes. Jake came in early, sitting at the island and watching us. He teased me when I got potato on myself trying to mash them. "Why dont you make yourself useful and set the table." I stuck my tongue out, channelling my inner 7 year old.

He winked at me and started grabbing plates and silverware. I couldn't help but admire him. He was always so sure of himself. Full of confidence, in everything. The way he moved, talked. I was jealous, but also full of pride. He was my Jacob. I was suprised bye the territorial note in my thoughts.

Everybody showed up for dinner, even tho Jake and I were the only one's who ate. They wished me happy birthday again and asked how I felt. I blushed, when all there eyes landed on me."Ah...I Dont Know...the same." I ducked my head, hiding behind my hair. Jacob was on my left, he grabbed my hand, squezing it under the table reassuringly. I sent him a thank you, and finished my dinner.

About a month after my birthday I was at home, watching tv in the living room. It was saterday, and I was just having one of those bad days. I was cranky, and simply wanted to be left alone.

Jake was on the chair, staying on the other side of the room. He always knew my moods, he sensed then. He knew I wanted him with me, but far enough not to bug me. Uncle Emmett strolled into the room, standing infront of the tv. My eyes narrowed, suspicious. "Move." I said calmy. Don't get irritated. Don't get irritated. I tried to tell myself. Stay calm. He didn't move. "Im bored. Lets play video games. " He sounded like a toddler. I wasn't in the mood for it. "No, now move." I said again, getting irritated know. He sighed and flopped on the coach, a foot away. Not even a minute later he looked over at me, and poked me. I growled, but he did it again. "Stop!" I snapped.

He sulked, but quickly smiled, looking over towards Jacob. "Hey Jacob, what's the difference between a woman with PMS and a terrorist?" He asked, and my temper flared. Jacob glanced at me, gulped nervously and looked at the tv. Emmett was unfased. "You can negotiate with a terrorist." He finished his joke like everybody was waiting for the punchline. I snapped, taking the remote in my hand and hucking it at his head. It hit, shattering into million pieces and scattered around the floor. He looked, shocked at me and busted out laughing.

I huffed, getting up and going to my room. I layed across my bed, trying to calm myself. There was a knock and my door opened. Jake came in, copying me and smiling. I tried not to smile back, but failed. "Whats wrong Ness?" He asked. I didn't really have a reason, I was just anoyyed. I shrugged my shoulders. "Nice shot." He whisperd. I couldn't help but laugh. He laid with me for a while, but had a confrence call with the garage on the rez and had to leave. The house was fairly quite, mom and dad were out 'hunting', grandpa was at work and Alice and Rose were shopping.

I picked up my phone, texting Ally **. HEY ALLY, WHATS UP?-NESS.** I got up, walking around my room and tidying it up. My phone buzzed, and i grabbed it. **HEY NESS, STUCK AT HOME FOR SOME FAMILY THING. WHATS UP WITH YOU? YOU WITH JAKE?;) -ALLY**.

 **NO, HES BUSY. JUST HANGING AROUND.-NESS.**

 **HAVE YOU LOOKED AT YOUR PRESENT? LOL-ALLY.**

 **OH GOD, DONT REMIND ME ABOUT THAT. NO, I HAVEN'T. BUT MY SISTER THOUGHT IT WAS HYSTERICAL.-NESS**. I always felt weird calling mom my sister, but it was the story.

 **IM TELLING YOU JUST OPEN IT. ONE CHAPTER.-ALLY**. I rolled my eyes. I didn't understand her obsession. I wondered over to my bookshelf, sliding the book out and looking at the cover. I put it back, and slumped on my bed again.

I was irritated and uncomfortable. There wasn't many things that I was physically susceptible to. I didn't get sick, and I usually didn't get very hot or cold unless they were extreme temperatures. I did get aches and headaches tho, and right know, I had both. I walked into my bathroom, plugging the tub and turning on the hot water, then made my way downstairs, searching the fridge for my goal. Chocolate. There was a Hershey's bar stashed in the draw, were grandma hide them from Jacob for me. I went back up stairs, giving up and grabbing the book and made my way back to the bathroom.

I stripped, sliding into the hot water and sighing. Breaking off a piece of chocolate, I grabbed the book and opened it to the first page. Some things did make me blush, but mostly it was informational. Definitely less technical then school books, it concentrated more on physical pleasure. With a partner, or without. I was sucked in, reading. A knock on my door made me jump, and I realized my water was almost cool. I put it on the low table near my tub, pulling the drain. I stepped out, and wrapped a large towel around myself. Cracking my door, I peaked out into my room. It was Jacob, standing with his hands in his pockets. He looked startled to see me, and a little embarrassed. "Hey, I was just letting you know dinner's almost ready." I blushed, and nodded. He turned around, and left. I put on some comfy clothes and went downstairs, having dinner with Jacob and grandma.

I woke the next morning, and was never so happy to get my period. I was worrying ever since my birthday, that I might not get it anymore, and what that might mean. I showered, and dressed, skipping my way downstairs and into the kitchen. Grandma was there, cooking, Jacob was already eating. He grinned when he saw me, and I made my way over to him, kissing his cheek.

"Goodmorning Jacob, goodmorning grandma."

I smiled, sitting down and eating my food she placed infront of me. It was a warm and sunny day, and I wanted to go outside. Jake and I made are way out, laying in the sun, talking about his online classes, and my highschool.

"Your in a really good mood today." He commented, and I smiled. I was in a good mood. At least better then yesterday. " Is there a reason?" I know he was just curious, he cared about me, and worried. He loved to see me happy.

"Im sorry I was so cranky, I was just..." I shrugged. "Pmsing?" He said, snorting and dodging away from me. "Dont you start, your softer then Emmett." I threatened, but blushed. He put his hands up, plams out. "Okay okay. Im sorry... But in all seriousness, did everything..work out?" I knew what he was asking, and it made me happy that he cared enought to ask. Most men shy away from that topic as much as possible. Jacob wanted to make sure I was okay. I grinned, and nodded.

"Grandpas still not sure how long it will last, it could go on for as long as im alive. We're not really sure. He said if I ever want to test for..fertility that he has a few ideas. " I said, one blush blending into another. "Thats great Ness, really." He smiled, and I could tell he was happy. Happy because I was.


	9. Chapter 9:Not a little girl

A/N:This chapter is dedicated to my first reviewer. You made my day. Enjoy :)

* * *

As the days passed, her birthday grew closer. I become more anxious, taking in every tiny change. Her hair grew a courter inch longer. She was 1/8 th of an inch taller. I knew after tonight she would stop growing. She would be forever the same, as perfect and breathtaking as she was. What would happen after tonight? I could feel the subtle shift in me, the transformation from best freind to..what? Lover? Oh god.

I panicked, pacing my room. I knew the imprint could tell the difference in her. The imprint and my body. It sensed her...development. she was a woman, in every important sense of the word. She had those incredible curves, and my body reacted to them. But more then that I could feel the maturity in her, she had outgrown her childhood. The imprint had always told me what she needed. when she needed a best freind, more then she needed a brother. It was an instinct, to know when she needed comfort, or a smile. I felt her, in everypart of me. She was the most important thing, and I couldn't mess this up.

I couldnt stand it anymore, I was driving myself crazy. I just wanted to see her. I left, making my way to her room. I felt the rubber band around my heart tug me to her, responding to her. She needed me to. I heard her on the other side of the wall, her breathe was loud and harsh. Her heart, usually beating faster then mine, was rapid. I didn't knock, just pushed the door quietly and peaked in.

She was on her bed, curled up with her arms around her knees, folded into a ball. Her face met mine and I could see the panick in her eyes. She was terrified, on the verge of a breakdown. I moved quickly, taking the spot near her and pulling her tightly to me.

"Whats wrong Nessie?" I asked quietly. Her face so alarmed, I wasn't sure she would be able to talk. She placed her small warm palm on my arm, and her feeling and thoughts hit me so sure and fast it knocked the wind out of me. Im scared of what will happen when I stop aging. Would I be completely frozen, like mom? Would I stop getting a period? would I never be able to carry a baby? What if I couldn't, would I resent myself? Ill never change, always look the same. Her panic and anxiety mixed with my own. I knew I had to calm her, help her.

"Oh hunny." I said, my voice soothing. I rocked her gently. "This is it Jacob, I'll never change." Her voice was small, scared. "That doesn't matter Ness, none of it matters. We are soo lucky. We get to live forever. You get to keep your parents, and me and we never have to grow old and die. The other stuff we'll figure out later." I knew we were lucky, to have eachother forever. All i needed was her bye my side. She wasn't going to change, but I didn't want her to. She was incredible the way she was. I didn't now how I felt about her fear of having kids. Iv never really thought about it, but I knew if it wasn't possible then it wouldn't matter. I didn't need that.

"And beside's, I think your pretty perfect the way you are." I said, grinning at her. She laughed and tucked into my side wrapped herself around me." Thank you my Jacob." She said quietly, I kissed her forehead gently. I held her to me, thinking about her fears. I remembered her 4th birthday, going to the house after patrol and Edward pulling me aside. He told me that Ness had gotten her period, she was okay. Bella talked to her but he thought I should know. At the time I was sad. She was growing so fast, everytime I saw her something was different. It wasn't until recently I thought about what it could mean, what would be possible in the future for us.

Her breathing slowed, and I glanced down. She was outcold. Her head resting on my chest. She was peaceful, beautiful. I sighed, and slipped out from beneath her, laying her head softly on the pillow and kissing her forehead. " I love you hunny." I whispered, and slipped out, making my way out of the door. Down the stairs Bella and Edward were there, waiting for me.

"How is she?" Bella asked, she sounded worried, concerd for her daughter. Her hand clutched her husband's. "She's okay Bells, just a little nervous. This is a big deal, she'll be okay." I patted her arm. "We were just about to go up when I heard you coming, We thought you might have better luck." Edward said, a hint of reluctant in his voice. I knew he trusted me with his daughter, but just like any father he wasn't ready to give her up. I nodded and left, making my way to my room. I needed to clear to my head, get the image of her sleeping face out of my head before i got myself introuble.

I woke the next morning, dressing and heading to the big house, and I walked into the kitchen. Ness was sitting at the island, Edward and Bella on her left, Esme and Carlisle at the front, and Alice and Jasper sitting at the table. I walked over, kissing the side of her head.

"Happy birthday." I whispered. Esme handed me a plate of food, and my stomach growled. She was an incredible cook. I sat down next to ness, devouring my plate. I heard her sweet laugh and glanced over. "Do you breathe when u eat?" She asked. Everybody laughed, and I just shrugged. I heard blondie walk in, and she made a disgusted noise in the back of her throat. "Dogs don't breathe Ness, they pant." Emmett followed in behind her, laughing. "At least he's not humping anyone's leg." My sweet Nessie snorted, and try'd to cover it, taking a sip of her milk. I flipped off Emmett, but ignored him and continued eating.

"Alright, I gatta go to school, are u driving me?" She asked me. "Ya, I'm coming." I got up and grabbed are plates, handing them to Esme "Thank you Esme." She patted my cheek lovingly, and I couldn't help but feel gratitude for this woman. She reminded me so much of my gone mom.

We left the house, winding are way down the street." How are you diong Nessie?" I asked. She looked much better then last night, calmer. A pink blush colored her cheeks. "Im better. I'm sorry I was such a mess last night." She sounded embarrassed. "Dont be sorry, you have every right to freak out. Everybody has bad days Ness." I wanted to reassure her, I wanted her to know she could always come to me. "I guess, everything just kinda...crashed down..thank you, bye the way. If u didn't come see me im not sure were that would of ended." I smiled and grabbed her hand. "You don't have to thank me Ness. I knew you needed me. I always know...and about last night..Just because you stopped aging doesn't mean you won't have that one day, you'r still human hunny, it could happen. But either way, it wouldn't change anything." She blushed again, but I could see in her eyes she belived me.

We pulled into the school, and I parked. "Thank you Jacob..really." she leaned up and kissed my hot cheek. She got out, heading to the building. I watched as her friend caugh up towards her, throwing her arms around her. There voices were lost in the crowd.

I went home, heading towards the garage. I had recently acquired a 2006 triumph scrambler, in really bad condition. It was a labor of love, and I got lost in the engine in no time.

I was pulled from my concentration bye a tiny, anoyying little pixie. She danced into the garage, with a pout on her face. "Jacob." She sang. I laughed, sitting up on floor. "What is it Alice?" "Can you do me a favor?" She asked, sweetly. Last time I said yes to that I ended up hanging pink lanters from a ceiling for an hour. "Whats the favor?" She smiled.

"Tell Ness to accept the gift, it will come in handy." I was stumped, trying to figure out what she could be talking about. "Okay?" She grinned and danced out of the garage. I looked at the time, Ness would be on lunch right about know. I sat down, pulling my phone out.

 **HOWS YOUR DAY GOING?-JACOB.** I sent, and waited.

 **PRETTY GOOD ACTUALLY, YOURS?-NESS**. She responded right away, and I smiled.

 **KINDA WEIRD ACTUALLY, WAS IN THE GARAGE WORKING ON MY BIKE AND ALICE CAME IN, TOLD ME TO TELL YOU TO ACCEPT THE GIFT? SAID IT WOULD COME IN HANDY?-JACOB**. I was curious about what she meant, and if I was admitting it to myself a little jealous that there was a part of her life I wasn't in.

 **WHAT GIFT IS SHE TALKING ABOUT?-JACOB**. I sent, and waited.

 **JUST SOMETHING ALLY GAVE ME, TRUST ME WHEN I SAY YOU DONT WANNA KNOW.-NESS.** Something she didnt want to tell me?

 **WELL KNOW I DEFINITELY WANNA KNOW, TELL ME-JACOB.**

 **JUST A BOOK, NOTHING SPECIAL.-NESS.** She was avoiding the question, that meant it had to be something embarrassing.

 **YOU KNOW I CAN TELL WHEN YOUR LYING-JACOB.**

 **GATTA GET TO CLASS, SEE YOU LATER.-NESS.** Her text came through and I sighed. I still had about two hours till I could pick her up, so I went for a run.

A couple years ago, Emily got pregnant, so Sam decided it was time for him to settle down and stop phasing. I took over as alpha, with Leah in my second. Seth was still my third, and once the Cullen's left, we stop getting new brothers. We were still a pretty large pack, with 10 of us. We hadn't had any visitors since the volturi, but we still ran patrols. Seth and Embry were in charge of walking the rez a couple times a month. They were the friendly faces, they listened to the town and made sure everything was safe. We started this about two years ago, when rumours started to spread that a young boy on the rez was getting beatin bye his father. Sam took this hard, and called a meeting, even tho he didn't phase anymore. Said that it was important to care for are people, and watch out for them. We talked to Carlisle and Charlie about it, and the man was taken care of. So know we did town patrols to.

I could hear Quil, thinking about Claire. _How are things going on your end?_ I asked him. Claire was 10 now, and in middle school. He went on about how she loved school, but it meant she couldn't see him as much. They were in the bestfreind stage, and she relied on him _. What about you man? It's Nessie's birthday. She's full grown know, that's gatta be hard_. His thoughts were sympathetic. _You have no idea..I dont know. Its weird sometimes. I can feel the change ,but im not ready. She's still so young_. I thought it, but at the same time she appeared in my head. Grown up and beautiful. _Maybe, but she's not as young as you see her sometimes._ He thought, and I sighed. I phased back, dressing and heading towards the school.

I parked and got out, walking around to her side and leaning on the door. The bell rang, and kids started swarming the lawn. I noticed a group of girls walk toward me, stopping a couple feet away and giggling to themselves. I didn't pay them much attention. I found my Ness, walking with Ally towards me. My smile faded slightly when I noticed her face, she looked pissed. Her cheeks were red, and she had a possessive look in her fiery eyes. Ally followed behind her, glancing at the girls to my left worriedly, like they were about to die. I knew my Ness like I new myself, and I knew we both had a bit of jealousy rage in us. I acted fast, taking a couple steps in her direction, and scooping her in a big hug. Her warm small body fit to mine, and I turned us slightly, putting the group behind me.

I smiled hugely down at her, and glanced over to Ally. Nessie blushed, looking towards her friend. "Oh. Jacob, this is Ally. Ally, Jacob." She said. Ally looked at me, sticking out her hand formally to shake mine. "So your Jacob. Iv heard alot about you, it's nice to finally meet you." She smiled at me, and turned slightly, leaning toward Ness. "Your soo going to need that book." She whispered. Nessie's eyes flashed to mine and she blushed. Ally just laughed. "Well I gatta go, see you tomorrow Ness, bye Jacob." She said and went off in a different direction

I raised my eyebrow, giving her a questioning look. I knew she knew I heard it, but her face soured and she walked around me, climbing in the car. I got in, started the engine and pulled out. "So. You ganna tell me yet?" I looked at her, she persed her lips, and deliberated. "No, and I dont think dad should know so don't think about it." The cureosity burned but I couldn't deny her. If she didn't want to tell me she didn't have to, so I put it from my mind.

We made it home, and I had to finish some school work, so I went back to my place. I tried concentrating on my work, I knew it was important. To graduate and make something of myself. If not for me, then for my Ness. She deserved a real man, someone who could care for her. I was diong better at it then I thought I would, and I was right on track.

When it became to much, I got up, heading for the big house. I could hear her in the kitchen, with Esme. I walked in, sitting at the island. Esme was teaching Ness how to cook some meals, and tonight was steak and potatoes, my favorite. I watched her, as she went about. Today was it, she would forever look this way. She was stunning, in tight yoga pants and a tanktop. She had a splatter of pink on her top, she must of been painting. Her black pants seemed to stretch down her long legs, loose at the bottom but tight around her thighs and hips. Her waist was small, and delicate. It trailed up, longer then I thought possible, to her full round b-No. Don't do it Jake. I shook my head, pulling my thoughts off of her.

I looked up, watching as she mashed the potatoes. She smiled at me, and splatterd herself with them, blushing. I laughed, teasing her. "Why dont you make yourself useful and set the table." She said, sticking her tongue out at me.

I winked and got up, walking over to the cabinets and started grabbing plates and silverware. I felt her eyes on me as I worked, setting the table for two. I didn't have to look to know she was abserving me. I felt it, in ever part of me. I peaked at her from the corner of my eye, and her eyes were intense on me, some strong emotion swimming in there depths.

The family joined us, Edward getting home with Jasper after a hunting trip. They usually joined us for dinner, after whatever activity they were diong during the day was done. With Ness so busy with school, and wanting her own space most of them didn't get to see her much. We ate and everybody wished her happy birthday again. Blondie asked her how she felt, and she blushed."Ah...I Dont Know...the same." She bent her head, hiding behind her curtain of hair. I knew she felt embarrassed, I reached over grabbing her hand, and squezing it reassuringly. I felt her mind open to me, and a quiet thank you passed into my thoughts. She went back to her dinner, and I finished mine.

The weeks passed quickly, and we fell into a routine. Breakfest, driving Ness. School, picking her up, either homework or hanging out, then dinner. It was a Saturday, about a month after her birthday. We were in the livingroom, watching some show of her choice. She was on the couch, and I was in a chair, far far away from her. My Ness was usually a sweet, loving girl. Today however, she was a cranky mean little girl. I wanted to spend time with her, to just be close to her. But I kept my distant, afraid to irritate her more. She woke up, grumpy. Turned down every suggestion I had for the day and said she wanted to stay inside. Sensing her moodyness, I quickly agreed to whatever she wanted.

It was calm, watching the show when Emmett strolled into the room, standing infront of the tv. Oh no. This is bad. Emmett was one of the only people who could really get Ness going. I glanced at her, and she had a dangerous look on her face. "Move." She said, trying to keep calm. Emmett didn't move. "Im bored. Lets play video games. " He wined. "No, now move." She said again, and I could hear the irritation growing in her voice. He sighed and flopped on the coach, a foot away from her. I sighed, there was no way this was going to end well. He leaned towards her, poking her. She growled, but he did it again. "Stop!" She snapped. Her eyes flashing menacingly.

He sulked, but quickly smiled, looking over towards me. "Hey Jacob, what's the difference between a woman with PMS and a terrorist?" He asked, and my eyes flashed to Ness. I could see her temper snap, unfolding in her eyes like a coiled snake. I gulped and went back to the tv. Emmett contined, unperturbed. "You can negotiate with a terrorist." He finished, cracking at his own joke. Ness snapped, and with her half vampire reflexes she wiped the remote at his head. It hit, shattering into million pieces and scattered around the floor. His face was shocked for a half second, then his loud ruckus laugher echoed through the house.

She huffed, getting up and leaving the room. I sighed, looking at him rolling on the couch. "What? is it something I said?" He asked, and I got up, following her. I knocked on her door, cracking it open and looked towards her bed. She was there, slumped across it. I smiled, and joined her, copying her. She fought the smile, but it flashed across her face unwillingly. "Whats wrong Ness?" I asked. I could see her face, deliberating, She shrugged her shoulders. I could tell she didn't wanna talk about it, whatever was bothering her. "Nice shot." I whisperd. She laughed, giving in to my charm. I stayed with her for a while, but had a confrence call with the garage on the rez and had to leave. I kissed her cheek, saying id see her for dinner and left.

I walked into the kitchen before dinner, sitting as Esme cooked. Emmet was in the living room, watching some football. Alice and Jasper were hunting, and blondie was in the garage. I could hear Edward and Bella somewhere in the house, talking about vacations and a second honeymoon. I quickly blocked them out. "Jacob dear, would u go get Renesmee and let her know dinners almost ready." She smiled lovingly and I nodded. Esme was always caring, always mothering us. Even when it was me and the guys she never got tired of taking care of us. I headed upstairs, knocking lightly on her door. Nothing, I cracked it open, peaking my head in. Her bathroom door was closed, and the light on. I made my way over, knocking on the door. I expected her response to come. I listened, a wet sloshing sound started, and low glug. The sink maybe? The knob turned and the door cracked, she stood in the light, a towel wrapped around her damp body. I gulped, trying to keep my eyes on her face. I shoved my hands in my jean pockets, looking anywhere but her.

"Hey, I was just letting you know dinner's almost ready." I said, and she nodded. I turned quickly, fleeing from the room. She came down about 5 minutes later, dressed in comfy clothes and we ate dinner.

I was at breakfast the next morning, eating the huge plate of food Esme had sat down infront of me. She came down a few moments later, skipping her way into the kitchen. She looked much happier then she had yesterday. I grinned at her, happy she was better. She walked over to me, kissing my cheek.

"Goodmorning Jacob, goodmorning grandma." She said, giving Esme her best smile. She sat down, and started eating her breakfest. She looked gorgeous, in her shorts and tshirt. She smiled warmly today, happy. Esme took are dishes, and dismissed us. I turned to her, smiling. "What would u like to do today?" I asked, wondering if it would be a repeat of yesterday. Her grin lite up her face and she looked out the window. " Its so beautiful out Jacob. Can we go outside?" I agreed quickly, and we made are way outside. Lounging next to the big willow tree in the front yard.

"Your in a really good mood today." I said, hoping my observation didn't upset her. She just smiled. I wondered why she had been so upset, I thought back to yesterday and the previous months. There was a trend, I knew that if things continued like they had been she would get her period soon. But I didn't want to ask, incase it wasn't that. I didn't want to open those flood gates. " Is there a reason?" I asked, cautiously. I was curios tho, if there was something different.

"Im sorry I was so cranky, I was just..." she shrugged, trailing off. My mind flashed back to Emmett's comment yesterday. "Pmsing?" I said, snorting and bolted away from her. "Dont you start, your softer then Emmett." She threatened, but her cheeks flamed. I put my hands up, in defeat. "Okay okay. Im sorry... But in all seriousness, did everything..work out?" I said. I wanted to make sure she was okay. Maybe I was a little out of depth with the whole woman cycle thing but Ness was the most important thing in my life. There was nothing that would keep me from checking on her. Girly stuff or not. She nodded, smiling and I felt strangely relieved. I knew that no matter what happened, I wouldn't trade her for the world, but I was glad the possibility was still there.

"Grandpas still not sure how long it will last, it could go on for as long as im alive. We're not really sure. He said if I ever want to test for..fertility that he has a few ideas. " she said, and blush bright red. "Thats great Ness, really." I said, and smiled. I could tell that this made her happy. The possibility that one day she might have that. I was happy, for her, but I wasn't sure if it was something I cared about. That future seemed so far off I couldn't think about it know.


	10. Chapter 10: A pet?

The first year in Montana seemed to symaltanisly fly bye and crawl. School passed quickly, and I came to the realization that although the human interaction entertained me, school bored me to no end. If it wasn't for ally I would of begged mom and dad to let me drop it. Ally had fast become one of my best freinds, even tho I had to edit my words around her, I knew she cared for me. A couple month's after meeting her I convinced mom and dad to let me go over her house, dad insisted on meeting her and her family first. So here I was, in the back seat of the Volvo getting dropped off.

" You know, daddy " I said, using his favorite term to soften him up. " If you taught me how to drive you wouldn't have to shofer me around." I said sweetly, leaning towards him and giving him my best smile.

He smirked, and sighed. " Just like your mom, using those eyes against me. Im not falling for it." I pouted, slumping back into my seat. Mom laughed, looking over to me and winked.

"We'll discuss it later." She said, smiling at dad. You could see him literally melt in his seat, Dad was putty in moms hands.

The teenager in me rolled her eyes at being dropped off bye her parents, but I knew that they were just making sure I was safe. It was...difficult, to ignore and overcome those natural human teenage instincts, I didn't always succeeded. There where times when I let it get the best of me, either my anger would bubble at something small or my lack of privacy would cause me to get even more frustrated.

We pulled up to the house, getting out and the door opened before I made it on the first step. Ally came bounding out the house, throwing her arms around me. I could see the front door swing, and in the frame was a little boy, maybe around 10. His hair was darker then allys, almost black but just like her his glasses were sliding down his narrow nose. She smiled hugely, stepping back.

"Ally, this is Rdward and Bella, my..brother and sister." I didn't think she would notice the slight delay in my speach, getting caught on my own words.

" This, is Ally." I said, gesturing to her.

She laughed, and waved. She looked alittle shy, which was quite unusual for my loud and rambunctious freind.

"Hello Ally, its nice to meet you." Mom said, smiling kindly. She had a welcoming way about her, u couldn't be nervous when mom smiled like that.

"Ally, is your mother home?" Dad asked.

"Oh!" she squeaked. I had to stifle a giggle. " ah..y-yes. She is." She turned, facing the little boy.

"Jonah, can u get mom for me?" He smiled, nodded enthusiastically and ran off. "That's my little brother Jonah, he's 10." Her voice trailed off as the little boy came rushing back, his hand grasped firmly in a womans. She was probably in her 40's. With long dark straight hair and pretty blue eyes. She patted the boys hand gently, and he smiled hugely, proud of his work.

"Hello dear, im so sorry, I was in the kitchen." She stepped outside, placing her hand on Allys hair and stroking it affectionately. She looked like a gentle woman, the love in her eyes shone for her kids.

"Mom, this is Ness, my freind from school. This is her brother, Edward and his.." she trailed off slightly, trying to remember the human version of family history I told her. Mom laughed gently.

"Im his wife, Bella. Its nice to meet you." She didn't step forward to shake hands, instead stepped closer to me, placing her hands on my shoulders.

"Its nice to finally meet you Ness dear, iv heard so much about you. Edward, Bella hello. My name is Lily. I was just getting ready to make some lunch if you would like to stay?" She asked.

I couldn't help but groan alittle in my head, don't you dare dad. I saw his lip twitch just the slightest, but it was mom who responded. "Thats so kind of you but were just dropping of Renesmee, we can't stay " she smiled.

"Renesmee? Is that your full name? Oh thats lovely!" Lily said, and she sounded genuine."Thank you." I said. Mom smiled but didn't say anything. She couldn't claim the name without them knowing she was my mom.

"It was nice meeting you lily, and Ness call when your ready for me to get you." Dad said, taking mom's hand. I waved as they drove off, and turned towards Ally.

She grined, and led me inside. Her house wasn't small, but very cozy. You could see signs of life everywhere. The shoes bye the door, the pictures on every wall. Every room had a diffrent color but they blended perfectly. Sweaters hung on the banister to the stairs, and mail lined the steps. It was very diffrent from my home, but you could see the happiness in this house.

We sat and talked while her mom made sandwiches, her little brother shadowed her, peaking at us every so often. I tried to smile when I caught him, but he would hide quickly behind his mom. She placed the sandwiches on the table, sitting down and helping Jonah. I started to wonder if there was more to him then being shy. I had never dealt much with younger kids, I had played with Clair when I was younger, but that was all.

After we ate I followed her upstairs, making our way to a door that had large purple letters on it spelling out Allison. She rolled her eyes and pulled me inside. My first impression was that it was very cluttered. Posters and pictures coverd every light lilac wall, clothes were strewn on the white carpet. Curled up on her bed was an orange fluff. It moved, stretching and showing its cute face.

"You have a kitty?" I asked, excited I walked to the bed, and stroked its back.

"Her name is ginger, she's my brothers but she sleeps in my room usually. Haven't you got any pets?"she asked.

I stiffled a laugh. I sometimes had a pet dog? "No, im not really aloud animals in the big house." It wouldn't exactly work, trying to have a pet in a house of vampires. I frowned, picking up the tabby cat and cuddling her.

"She adorable." I said. "Ask Jake, im sure he would get you one, you know he can't say no. " she laughed, closed her door and sat on the bed.

I contemplated it, I probably could get away with it, but I wasn't sure if Jake would really want one. "How are things with you two?" she asked, winking and leaning back. I rolled my eyes, she would never get over her obsessions with Jake and me.

"Where just freinds Ally. You know that."

"Ya, and. You still have the hots for him." I blushed, but knew I couldn't deny it. I did have a crush on him, but I was trying to ignore it. It didn't mean anything.

"So your moms really nice, and your brother seems sweet " I said. Steering the conversation of me.

"Ya, they are.." she trailed off, her eyes floating off to a picture on her wall. There was a man, strong and standing proud, in a uniform. I wasn't much familiar with the branches of military but this man looked important.

"Is that your father?" I asked gently. I had a feeling he wasn't around anymore.

She startled, glancing at me and sniffing slighlty. "Ya, he was...he died about a year killed in a car crash." I wasn't very use to heartache, but I could see the pain on Allys face.

"Is Ally. He is your father. Just because he's not here doesn't mean he isn't." She smiled, grateful and nodded. I was happy I could help her.

"Your brother's pretty quite.." I commented. "He hasn't talked much since the accident..the doctors say hes fine, just...non verbal."

"Doctors?"

"Ya..mom took him to see a doctor a couple weeks after he stopped talking. He goes to see a child psychiatrist but doesn't really help much." She frowned alittle, but smiled after.

" So, how are you liking highschool?" I laughed, and fell into easy talk with her. I enjoyed my day of normal teenage problems, and she talked about the kids she had grown up with.

" I was at this freshman party with everybody and back then I wasn't exactly...very nice. You know how it is, growing up with a big family, it gets..crowded and I wasn't always so humble. I have two big brothers, there twins, one moved to California and got married. The other goes to collage in washinton. So I kinda rebeld, and I was drinking at the party. I made some bad decisions, one of them being brad." She rolled her eyes and grimaced.

" I called my dad that night to pick me up, and on the way...he got hit." She paused, taking a breath. "After that, I got my act togather, and stopped hanging with those people. Its terrible..what happend. But it helped me realise I was throwing my life away."

I was struck, in that moment how very young I was. Not the age sense, but I had only lived for 7 years, I hadn't truly seen much of this world, experience these emotions. Sure I could remember being scared when the volturi were coming. Frightend for myself, but also for the people who had stood with my family. But I had never had to loose anybody, had never felt that heartache of loss. "Im glad I met you." she smiled, and I leaned forward and hugged her to me.

"Me to ally." The rest of my day passed, hanging out with Ally and after dinner dad picked me up.

I walked out to the car, Getting in and turning to face him. " How was your day sweetheart?" He asked, pulling out smoothly and accelerating down the street. " It was really great." I grinned. "I must say, that you seem to have found the one person in this town with the most genuine mind iv ever heard. Your freind Allison is very kind, and me and your mother approve. " he said happily.

"She is, she's had such a hard life tho." I frowned, remembering her story. Dad listening to my thoughts, and smiled hugely at something. " That was very compassionate of you, what you said about her father." I blushed alittle, but shrugged. " I never relized sometimes how much I take my family for granted. There's so many things iv never had to experience." I frowned. Great full for my life but sad over how much loss there is in the world.

We made it home, and I made the effort to round everybody up for a family movie night. Half way throught Emmett's movie pick, The Dark Knight Rises and a thought wandered into my head. Everybody froze when dad unexpectedly started laughing. I giggled, realizing he was laughing at my thoughts. They all looked at us oddly, use to the silent conversations but confused. I looked towards Jake, smiling sweetly and blinking slowly, pouting slightly. You could see his eyes crumble, he didn't even know what I wanted, but knew immediately he would give it to me. "My Jacob.." I said, giving him my best pleading impression. He touched my face, trying to place a smile on it.

"What is it Nessie, what do u want?" He smiled, happy as always to give me anything I wanted. I smiled and touched his cheek, placing the image in his head. Dad laughed again, and Jacob groaned. I pouted.

"Pleasssseee my Jacob, I cant have one in this house. I promise ill take care of him." I could hear mom asked dad what I was talking about, I ignored it.

" Really Nessie, a cat? How about something cool. Like a reptile.?" I pushed my bottom lip out, widing my eyes and pleaded with my face. I heard mom's soft giggle, and Emmett snorted, turning back to the movie.

He sighed, shaking his head slowly. "Your dangerous. You know that...fine. you can keep it in my place, but it's your responsibility!" I clapped happily, hugging him tightly. " Can we go tomorrow?" I asked excitedly.

"Sure sure." He said, turning back to the tv before I could guilt him into anything else. I smiled the rest of the night, thinking about my kitty.

I woke up the next day, showerd and changed. Wearing my uniform all week meant that on the weekends I got dress up alittle more. It was fall in montana, but still pretty warm. I found a pair of nice light jeans, and they hugged my figure perfectly. I picked one of my favorite tops, a white boho looking loose tanktop, that scrunched at the bottom tight to my skin. I walked out, securing my necklace and a knock sounded.

"Come in." I knew it was Jacob, I could hear him on the other side of the door. He walked in, happy as always and plopped on my bed. His eyes glanced to my wall, were my favorite painting of him sat. I grabbed a pair of ankle socks, pulling them on.

"Are you almost ready?" He asked. He looked great, in his normal jeans and tshirt. He had boots on, his light tan ones. I nodded, and impulsively walked over hugging him to me. He laughed, but hugged me back.

"What was that for?" I shrugged, blushing alittle.

"Because I wanted to. Let me grab some shoes and ill be ready." I walked to my closet, scanning my shoes for the ones I wanted and finding them. I turned to my sweaters, pulling the tan knited cardigan of the hanger and pulling it on. I sat on the bed, lacing up my boots. They were a girls version of Jake's work boots, the same shade with a small heel. I stood, Glancing in the mirror and cheeking my hair. It was partly dry, curling into a large mass. I turned to him, opening my arms.

"How do I look?" I asked. He was quite for a moment, then stood, took one large step to me and placed his palms on my cheeks. They flushed, heating under his strong hands.

"You look beautiful." He said, sincerely. I gulped, trapped in his gaze. He smiled, and released me.

"Lets go get you a cat." I grinned, and followed him down the stairs, finding mom and dad on the couch. They were cuddled into eachother, and I rolled my eyes. "Me and Jacob are going out. We'll be back later." I said, starting passed them. "Hold on young lady, be home before 9, its a school night. Do you need my card?" He asked, looking at me.

"No, I got it." Jake said, grabbing my hand.

"Alright, we probably won't be here when you get home, but well see you in the morning. " he said, pulling mom closer to him.

"Ew. Come on jake." I pulled him into the garage, towards his dodge challenger and climbed in. I had a grimace on my face as he pulled out and he laughed.

"What?"

"Your face, you look grossed out."

"I am, do they have to be soo..." I trailed off. "All of them, I mean do you know how hard it is, to be the only one who sleeps in a house full of married vampires? Not something I like to hear."

He busted out laughing, his voice reverberating throught the car. "You hear them?"he asked.

"Sometimes, usually its just Rose or Emmett. Once I heard mom. Grossed me out so much. Thats why they usually leave now." I shook my head, trying to wipe the mental image.

"Wow im so sorry. If its ever to much you can come sleep with me." He said, then his face flooded under his dark skin with blood. "I-uh. Meant y-you can sleep in the other room." I laughed, placing my palm on his hotter then usual face. "I know what you meant Jake, relax." His face was embarrassed, but it didn't bother me.

We made are way into town, searching. It took us a while but we found an animal shelter. Mom said if I wanted a pet to look at the shelters first, she said those animals needed someone to love them. I agreed, so we made are way inside, following the signs to the cat area. I squealed when I saw the large room full of them, sprinting my way inside.

I couldn't even remember how long I stayed in that room, petting every kitty. They were all so cute, and I simply couldn't choose one. I had a pretty Ragdoll breed in my lap, she had bright blue eyes and varying colours and patterns swirling along her coat. She was large, with a semi-longhair soft and silky coat, she was about 3 years old. She was the biggest cuddler ever, and her name was hazel. I held her in my arms, turning toward jake and smiled. He looked happy, sitting on the floor with a small maine coon kitten in his lap. He had bright yellow eyes, and his coat was long and fluffy. Stripes of brown, black and white throughout his coat and he was feisty. Biting jakes finger and flicking his tail.

"What's his name?" I asked him.

"Gatsby." He said, smiling at the little kitten. I could see in his eyes, he was hooked.

"Is he fixed?"

"His chart says he is, why?"

I smiled at him, walked over and sat near him. " This is hazel, and there both coming home with us." He grinned at hazel, petting her soft head. "Hazel and Gatsby." He said.

"Hold him and ill go to the counter about paperwork." He said, handing me the kitten. Hazel seemed to tolerate Gatsby, but she looked midly annoyed bye the rambunctious kitten.

A woman walked in, heading towards me. "Are you guys adopting these two?" She asked kindly.

"Yes, my-uh. Jacob just went out to do the paper work." I said, stumbling slightly on what Jake was to me.

"Thats wonderful, hazel has been here for some time. Ill just need to take them to the vet while you fill out the paper work so we can get the okay for them to go. "She held her hands out and I stood, handing them to her and holding the door open for her. I followed her out, going to Jake, and helped him with the information. It took a while, to fill out all the papers and then we had to wait for the information to be checked and approved. Jake was annoyed by the long process, but I told him there just trying to make sure they go to a good home. Finally, the woman came back out with two carriers.

"All your paperwork has been cleared, and you guys are approved. I have a packet here of all there health info, there history and the food there currently on. If you guys have any problems please contact us and well help any way we can. And I must say it's so nice to see such a young couple adopting from a shelter." She smiled, and I blushed at her implications.

She handed the carriers to Jakeband the packet to me."Have a wonderful day." She said happily and turned back to the counter. I smiled at him, excited. We left, heading towards home.

"Jake!" I exclaimed, remembering. "We have to go to the pet store."

He laughed at me. "I know, I was just dropping them off at home first." I blushed, I should of relized that. "Oh..I knew that." He chuckled, making his way up the drive. He ran around the big house, putting them in his place, and then came back.

"Did u let them out?"

"No, they were sleeping so I left them."

Within half an hour we were at a large pet store in town, making are way through the isles. We got the same food they had at the shelter, and picked up everything we could think of. Bowls, toys, litter box, and picked a large cat tree that would start from the floor the ceiling. With the cart full, Jake paid and we left.

We spent the rest of the day setting up his house, around five he left to get us pizza, and we ate on the floor playing with our kittys.

He was on the couch, and I was curled up to his side, resting my head on his chest. Hazel was curled up in my lap, and Gatsby was laying across his stomach, sprawled out. I laughed quietly at are little group, peeking up at him. He smiled, and leaned down kissing my forehead. My heart flutterd, and my pulse quickened, but I tried to ignore it.

I was confused when I woke up a couple hours later, it was dark but the tv was shining light into the living room. I looked around, my head foggy. Hazel and Gatsby had found beds on the cat tree near the entertainment center. I was still on the couch, curled up to Jake. His arm was around me, holding me to him. I looked for a clock, craning my neck towards the kitchen. The oven said 1am. Shit. Im in trouble. I glanced up, he was out cold, snoring like a train. I slipped carefully from his arms, tip toeing out of his house. I barely had time to hope my parents weren't home yet when I opened the back door and found mom waiting for me in the big room.

"Im sorry, really iv been home since like 3. We were playing with the cats and we fell asleep in the living room. I didn't mean to." I said quickly, whispering for some reason.

"Relax Renesmee, I know what happend. Your dad could hear your thoughts. Were not mad. I just wanted to talk real quick."

"Okay.." I said, alittle confused. "About what?"

"Well, one of the things you need to be cautious of is the way things look sweety. You had the advantage of dad knowing nothing was happening. But as a young woman, you have to be conscious of your actions. For example falling asleep with a man in his place past your curfew."she said, raising her eyebrows. "Isnt the best way to start of being an adult. Do you understand, what im saying?" She asked. I nodded, I did understand. Even if that man was Jacob, and even if his place was 10 feet away from this house. I had to be responsible.

"Yes mama, I understand."she smiled, pulled me to her for a hug. "Good, know get to bed."

"Goodnight." I said, and headed upstairs. I pulled my top and pants off, crawling into bed and passing out.


	11. Chapter 11: Attraction

My first school year passed, and I aced all my classes. They were easy, most thing's I had already learned from dad before I even started school. While I did well, I never went out of my way to prove how smart I was. I wanted to blend in enough not to draw notice of myself.

Most nights I helped Jacob with his school work also. He was diong really well, and I was proud of him. He had a couple more weeks till he was finished, but after that he would start his business classes at the local collage in September.

It was june first and the last day of school. Everybody was raving about the end of school party that was happening at Brad's house. I had been invited several times, but turned it down everytime.

Instead I had permission to have a sleepover at my house, with Ally. Jasper, Emmett, Grandpa and Dad were being kicked out for a guys hunting trip and the girls had free rein of the house. Tonight would be a girl filled slumber party and tomorrow, Aunt Alice was taking us shopping. The high from summer had me beyond excited for the next couple days. I hadn't stopped smiling all day, and when the bell rang Ally and I bolted outside, joining in with the cheer of the school.

Waiting in Jake's normal spot was my mom, with dads Volvo. I grinned, throwing my arms around her, she laughed.

"Are you excited?" She asked.

"Yes!" I exclaimed. She smiled at Ally.

"Nice to see you again Ally." Mom said. We climbed into the car, and made are way home. When we pulled up to the gate Ally's mouth popped open, watching them open and then close behind us. She looked at me with wide eyes and I laughed.

"Geez Ness, you never told me you were friken rich" she said, as we pulled up to the circle driveway. I laughed at her articulate vocabulary. "My dads a doctor." I shrugged, referring to grandpa.

I pulled her out of the car, up the porch and into the house. Again, her mouth popped open as she took in her surroundings, looking through the big light grand room, the whole right side of the first floor was one room, houseing the living room, and big screen tv, all of the gaming units and massive amounts of movies and games. Towards the back was dad's piano, with a quiet sitting area, and the large glass doors going to outside. On the left was a wide opening to the kitchen and dinning room. On the other side of the large curved staircase was grandpa and grandma's room.

Grandma was waiting near the stairs, smiling gently. "Ally." I said, grabbing her attention. " This is Esme."

She waved at Ally. "Hello Dear. Its lovely to meet you." Ally was struck, staring like a deer in headlights." Y-you to..your house is beautiful." I laughed, pulling her overnight bag from her shoulders.

"Come on Ally, ill show you to my room." I dragged her upstairs and down the hall, opening my room and leading her in. I dumped her bag on my bed and she wondered around my room, peeking throught some of my paintings stacked in the corner, looking through my bookcase. She smirked back at me, and tapped the cover of the book she had given me. She walked towards my dresser, lightly touching my necklace.

"You have a thing for wolves huh?" She asked, I laughed.

"What makes you think that?"

"Some of your paintings, and your necklace." She shrugged.

"Your kind of nosy, huh?" I shot back. She laughed, stopping in place to look at the painting on my wall.

"Holy shit, did you do that?" She pointed to my favorite painting. "Um, ya. I did."

"Ness. Thats serously good. Dam. You really captured him. I could never do that good." I blushed. "We have different styles, thats all. It doesn't mean im any better." She rolled her eyes at me. "Alright, im changing." I said, grabbing some shorts and my favorite stolen shirt, and making my way into the bathroom. I walked out a couple minutes later, and she walked in with her clothes.

I wondered to my windows, glancing down into Jacob's home. I could see the reflection of his tv in the living room, and I could see him streched out on his long leather sofa, Hazel curled up on his chest and Gatsby biting his foot. I laughed to myself, I missed him.

"What are you looking at?" I jumped, having been too distracted to hear her come back. She looked over my shoulder, down at what I had been watching.

"Ahh..I see know. That's a pretty nice view, I still can't belive you talked him into two cats." She shook her head, laughing.

" I already told you, I didn't talk him into too, he got attached to that certifiably crazy one. That thing goes spastic when hes bored." I said laughing, remembering a time he had jumped from the top step of his cat tree onto Jacob on the coach, landing painfully on his..manhood. I had been rolling on the floor with tears in my eyes laughing so hard. I felt bad afterwards, offering him an icepack trying to keep the smile from my face, his eyes bulged and he jumped back from me. I cracked again, dropping the icepack and leaning onto the wall.

"Your mean, do you even realize what ice would do to a man!" He huffed. I couldn't speak through my laughter, so I just nodded. He growled playfully and scooped me up, I couldn't even stop him, I was still laughing so hard. He walked outside and with no warning threw me straight into the pool. I came up, spluttering and glared at him.

"What was that for!?"

"For laughing at my pain!" He said. I swam to the edge, looking up at him innocently. "Can you help me up?" I put my hand out, waiting for him to grasp it and pulled him in. He surfaced, laughing. "Im sorry I laughed at your hurt..pride." I said, swiming towards him. " I forgive you."

My brain swam back to the present, focusing on my surrondings.

" Ness..Ness..earth to Ness.."she said, my eyes focused and I realized Jake had leaned over, and was looking directly at me. I blushed, beat red and turned to face her. "Huh?"

"Wow, you got it bad." She laughed.

"Come on, im hungry." I followed her out of my room and downstairs. The living room had been transformed into a slumber paradise. Alice's diong im sure. The large L sofa was coverd with balnkets and pillows of all sizes. The coffee table held every snack imaginable to man kind. From popcorn to chocolate, candy, chips, twizzlers. Mom, Aunt Rose and Alice were already in 'pajamas' situated around the space. Thankfully Ally already met them, so it wasn't a shock on her.

We sat down, and grandma walked in. "Alright lady's, do we want to cook dinner or order out?" She looked at me, knowing the rest of my family wouldn't be eating. "Pizza?" I asked the room, Ally smiled and nodded. Grandma smiled, and grabbed her keys. "Ill be back with it soon." We snacked and started are line up of movies. The Great Gatsby, Bridesmaids, About last Night, and Dirty Dancing. Grandma came home about 30 minutes later, with two pizzas. Ally and I ate while everybody else pretended to eat.

"Im Gonna go make sure Jake ate something, ill be right back." I ignored Ally's smirk and picked up the second pizza box, walking outside and into his place. I laughed when I saw him in the same position as earlier, outcold on the sofa. I put the box down on the counter, kneeling infront of him. I placed my palm on his face, sending a picture of myself into him. Wake up, I thought.

"Ness.." It was just a whisper, a word mumbled in his sleep. My heart raced, and I sighed. My attraction to him had just seem to grow stronger and stronger. Not only did I feel the attraction, but I was feeling the emotions even more lately. When he hugged me, I didn't want to let go. When he kissed my cheek, I wanted to simply turn my head and feel those lips on mine.

"Jacob.." I said quietly. He seemed pretty outcold, so I stood up and walked to his room, grabbing his sticky pad and a pen.

 _Didn't want to wake you, brought you pizza. Eat something. Ill see you tomorrow. Love, your Ness._

I left it on the coffee table infront of him, and made my way back to the living room. Half the food on the table had been replaced with a wide variety of nail polishes. I laughed as Alice painted Ally's toenails a bright yellow. We continued are movies and she moved on to me, making mine a deep green.

Ally was passed out bye the end of About last Night. Mom scooted closer to me, and I cuddled myself against her stone side. "How was Jake?" She whisperd. "Asleep. I left him a note." I said back. She eyed me for a minute, and I had a feeling she wanted to say more, but she looked over my head towards the rest of the my family and didn't say anything else. I feel asleep soon after, dreaming of Jacob and pools.

I woke the next morning, to the smell of pancakes and bacon. I was comfortable, and I could hear Ally's heartbeat close by, her breathing slow and steady. I could tell she was still sleeping. A sound caught my ears, a hushed conversation.

"What are you going to do about it?" My moms voice was quite, and soft.

"I dont know yet.." Jake responded. I froze, keeping my breathing even. I knew I shouldn't listen, it was wrong. But my curiosity got the best of me.

"What ever you decide, we support your decision. Edward and I have already talked about it." She responded and then it got silent.

I decided not to push my luck, and rolled over, streching. I sat up, and glanced at Ally, she looked peaceful. I walked towards the kitchen, mom was at the stove, making breakfast and Jacob was sitting on a stool at the island. I walked towards him, still groggy and wedged my way between him and the other stool, laying my head on his shoulder. He chuckled, wrapping one arm around me.

"Well goodmorning."

"Hmmm." I groaned. The amount of suger I had consumed last night made me feel sluggish. His arm tightened around me and I breathed in his musky scent. I was content in his arms, but I could hear Ally stirring. I sighed, and pulled free, sitting on the stool near him and grabbing a plate with two pancakes. She walked in, pulling her straight hair back into a bun and slumping onto a stool.

"Goodmorning." Mom said. I yawned, smothering syrup on my pancakes.

"Mmmmm." Was Ally's only reply. Jake laughed, and looked at me.

"Wow, you guys really can't handle staying up late can you. Its like night of the living dead around here. I dont know Bells, maybe they should nap instead of shop." He teased. Mom placed food infront of Ally and grabbed the juice out the fridge, putting it on the table.

"Don't say that Jake, you'll give Alice a heart attack." She said laughing. I ate my pancakes, enjoying the sweet maple syrup.

"Im going to change, Ness can I use your shower?" Ally asked. "Ya of course." She finished her meal and disappeared upstairs. Mom cleaned up, and Jacob turned his chair, facing me and I leaned into him. "Thank you for the pizza." He said quietly, his voice brushing over my ear and I shiverd. " Your welcome." My voice wavered, and I blushed. I stayed in his arms, relaxed. At some point mom disappeared, and let us alone. I wanted to ask about there conversation, but I had a feeling it was about us, and if it was then I had clearly heard him say he didnt know what to do. I wondered how thing would play out from here. Did he feel this change? Or was it just me? I sighed and leaned forward. " I need to go shower and change."

"Alright, ill see you when u get back?" I nodded and hugged him. Pulling back I kissed his cheek, lingering a second longer and left.

Ally was coming out as I made my way into my room, drying her hair and dressed in jeans and a tanktop. I went into the bathroom, stripping and showering quickly. I got out and dried off, pulling on a robe and brushing through my hair. I walked out, laughing at Ally sprawled across my bed. There was a pile of folded clothes on the corner. "Alice said to put those on." She said. I grabbed the pile and went back to the bathroom, dressing. Aunt Alice had picked out a cotton summer dress, grey and white with a stripped design and blue faux buttons on the front of the bodice. I went to my closet, picking a pair of grey flats to match.

"That's really cute." Ally said. I put my necklace on. "Thank's, Alice is something of an expert when it comes to clothes. You'll see today." I laughed.

An hour later we were in Aunt Alice's porche, heading to the largest mall Montana had to offer. I had warned Ally about Alice and her shopping habits, but it wasn't until we were in the big stores that she belived me. "Oh my god she's like a shopping god!" she said laughing, within hours we had bags on bags. I had practically a whole new wardrobe for summer, and Alice had to start bringing the bags to the car. We stopped for lunch, eating in the large cafeteria.

"Are we going into Victoria secret?" Ally asked.

"No." I said quickly. "Definitely." Was Alice's louder reply.

"Come on Ness, maybe you'll need it soon." She said laughing and winked.

I spluttered, blushing." I dont know what your talking about." They both laughed at me. "Oh Come on, We all see it. Jake can barely keep his eyes off you." Aunt Alice said. I blanched, hearing that come from my aunt's mouth. Ally laughed, enjoying this to much. "She's right, give him a little peak and he wont be able to stay away." I ignored them, getting up and dumping my tray. "Are we continuing or are you guys going to discuss my sad love life some more?" They both laughed but followed me out.

We splurged alot, getting new shoes and tops, dresses and I got a couple bathing suits. It was never warm enought in washinton and know we had a pool so I could get them. I did get pulled into vs, following them around while they shopped. I could tell Alice was shopping for me, I knew she didn't wear those sizes so I was wondering with Ally.

"What about one of these?" I blushed when she lifted up a pair of..panties? "What is that suppose to be?" I asked.

"Its a thong Ness, haven't you ever worn one?" She sounded sceptical."Umm, no. And it does not look comfortable." She flung it at me, laughing as Alice came around the corner. "Its not at first, but you get use to it."

"Why would you want to?" I couldn't fathom why someone would willingly wear this. "No Panty lines, there genius really. Iv already picked some up for you. Your old enought to get them know. Your mom said it was fine." Alice's voice chirped from my elbow. I knew it was pointless to argue with her, so I didn't.

Finally we were on are way home, Alice had droppped off Ally and I was exhausted. We pulled up and Alice brought all my bags upstairs. I followed her, leaving them on the floor and changing into shorts and a tank top. I enjoyed my day out shopping, but right know there was only one person I wanted to see.

I made my way outside, across the lawn and into Jacob's house. I smelled fresh dirt, and noticed the dirty floor prints, I followed them into his room and they trailed into his bathroom. I listened and heard the shower running. He must of gone for a run, and came home to clean off. I laid on his big bed, burrowing into his warm sheets and inhaling his scent. I tried hard not to think about him 20 feet away from me, in his shower. I closed my eyes, relaxing. It was no use, I just kept coming back to him.

Okay, so maybe I did feel differently about him. Was that such a bad thing? He was my imprint, so wasn't this the way it was suppose to be? It wasn't wrong to feel these things, we were suppose to be together. I heard the shower cut off and waited. I was just wondering if maybe laying in his bed was considered inappropriate when the door opened and he stepped out.

I froze, my breath coming out in a gasp. He stood, a towel wrapped loosely around his hips. Water was slowly trailing down his chest, rolling over his muscled stomach. My eyes flashed to his, that were looking directly at me.

"Ness, what are you diong!" He asked, suprised coated his voice. I blushed, embarrassment coursing throught me.

"I-uh..I was just waiting.. Uh, I-Im ganna go." I said quickly, and in true vampire nature bolted from his room, running straight up to mine and slaming the door. I threw myself onto my bed, wallowing in my self stupidity. I heard the heavy steps coming up the stairs, down the hallways and stopped at my door.

"Ness.." His voice called me, gentle. I ignored it. A heavy sigh sounded."Renesmee, can I come in?" I didn't respond, hoping he would give up. He ignored my lack of response and came in aways, stepping in and shutting the door. "Holy shit." He said under his breath, im sure from seeing all the bags.

My bed sagged, and my body tensed. "Im sorry, I didn't know you were in my room. I didn't mean to make you feel..uncomfortable." He said, he sounded upset. What was I supposed to say? You didn't make me uncomfortable, I find you incredibly attractive? I shook my head, I couldn't let him feel responsible for this one.

I sat up and took his hand, but kept my gaze downwards. _This isn't your fault Jacob , I should of known better then to wait in your room with you in the shower. You didn't make me feel uncomfortable._ His hand gripped mine, and his other reached for my face, titling it up to face his. My eyes flickered around, avoiding his. "If you weren't uncomfortable then why did you run?" He asked, his voice was low. I felt my blood boil under the surface, turning my whole body pink. I shrugged, _I dont know..I guess I was just embarrassed.._

"Ness, look at me." His tone pulled me in, forcing my eyes to his. "Why?"

I had a flash of his bare chest, the drops of water gliding down his body. A strong feeling flowed throught me. Not all together new, I felt it around him before. It was a need, to be close to him, to feel his arms around me. I felt it flow out of me and into his palm. His eyes widened, reading my emotions. His hand was still on my face, I was silent, waiting.

My heart hammerd, and time slowed. His dark eyes seemed to melt, giving way to the emotions in them. In that moment I was almost sure he felt the same way. Unconsciously I leaned forward, his face inches from mine.

"Nessie.." He sighed and dropped my face, leaning away and rejection washed throught me. I tried to stop the tears from welling but it was no use. I looked away quickly, and got up, heading to my bathroom. "Goodnight Jacob." I closed the door and sat on the floor. Letting my tears run silently down my face.


	12. Chapter 12: Stupid

A/N:Hello my lovely readers. Hope you enjoy this next bit. I have most of this story mapped out in my head, so i promise there's a reason to the madness. As always read and review! Your reviews fuel this story!

* * *

Stupid. Stupid. Stupid. What's wrong with you Jake. Why are you soo stupid. Why did you do that. God, im such an ass. Two weeks, its been two weeks and she's barely spoken to me. It was killing me. She could hardly look at me.

I yelled at myself everyday for what I did to her. Of course she didn't understand. She didn't realize that I wanted nothing more that night then to crush her lips to mine and never let her go. The intense feeling that had coursed through me had terrified me. What was I doing? I couldn't do this, not yet. She was only seven! Had barely been alive. She had so many things she could do and here I was trying to kiss her. I wanted to tell her, make her understand.

The look on her face, before she walked away haunted my dreams. Her beautiful chocolate eyes swam with tears, and I could feel her pain in my depths. She had shown me her inner thoughts. Her desire to be close to me, had shown me that she liked my body, and to her I had rejected her. I didn't know what to do, I had to make it right somehow. I couldn't stand this distance, this pain.

I thought about what I would say for days. What could possible make this right. I had to explain that it wasn't that I didn't want her, I just couldn't do this yet. I wasn't ready to take on that role, she wasn't ready. Even as I told myself that I felt a part of me fight back. I didn't know which, was it the imprint? or the wolf? Something wanted her. Wanted to be there for her, and kiss her. Make her mine before somebody else tried. That part of myself scared me, but I wouldn't let the wolf in me mess this up. I refused to be reckless with her for my own wants. I sat down, trying to relax. Within minutes I was pulled back to that night.

I sat on her bed, frozen. Not sure what to do. Should I go to her? Or would I just make thing's worse? The sound of her heartbeat pounding filled my ears, and the scent of salt reached my nose. She was crying? My chest constricted, painfully. I had to do something, anything to help her. I stood, walking numbly out her door and following a familiar scent till I found Bella in the living room with a book on her lap.

"You have to go to Ness." I said, grabbing the book from her. She inspected my face, and immediately worry carved its way into her stone features.

"What's wrong Jake, are you alright?" I hung my head, shame filling me.

"Dont worry about me, just go to Nessie please." She was silent for one second but nodded and left. I could hear her knock on the bathroom door. "Ness baby. Can I come in?" I heard footsteps and the door swing open. "Oh baby what happend.. Shhh, its okay. Don't cry, talk to me." I sat on the couch, burying my face in my hands. "Ness im sure that's not it. You dont know if that's why. Dont assume anything hunny." I was greatfull for Bellas dialogue, giving me some insite into my imprint's mind. "Renesmee that's not true, there's nothing wrong with you."

I felt the heat roll down my spin, anger. Pure rage at myself, for causing her so much pain. My hands shook, and I trembled. I bolted out the front door, making it off the porch as I erupted into my wolf form. The pain was easier this way, more manageable, and that disgusted me more for trying to ease my pain when I couldn't ease hers. My head flew back, howling into the night. The sound ripped its way into the blackness and I ran. Ran until I was miles into the forest. I circled the gate, not wanting to go outside incase they needed to find me. I ran until it was light outside, the sun rising above the forest. At some point I had simply collapsed on the ground, succumbing to the pain.

I surfaced sometime later, when it was dark again and there was a white stone figure in eyesight. Edward stood, five feet from me, his face was hard. Angry but I knew I deserved it.

"Why don't you show me your side of thing's before I make any judgement calls." Yep, definitely pissed. I ran it over in my head, cringing internally. He was quite for a while, and his face relaxed alittle. He walked closer, gracefully sitting down near me.

"Of course im very mad that you hurt my little girl, and im not going to lie, I wish you didn't feel this way so soon. Fortunately for you Bella and I have decided to trust your judgement when it comes your relationship with Ness."

 _Ya, look how that turned out. I thought. I messed it up. I let myself get carried away and I hurt her. I don't know what to do._

"Jacob, if you want my opinion. Tell her the truth. She'll understand your reasoning if you just tell her."

 _Easier said then done._

"Can I ask why your not pursuing that relationship with her?" He asked. I was shocked, I would of thought he would be please.

"Don't get me wrong, I am pleased. She's my little girl, of course im not ready to loose her. But ill always think that, ill never be ready to give her up."

 _I...she's just so young. She's not ready_.

He raised one eyebrow, standing. " I don't think its her who's not ready." And with that he was gone.

I came back to the present, slumping back on my bed and looking up at Nessie's window. I had tried a couple times to get her to talk to me, she always made an excuse and would rush out of the room, off to her freinds house or driving lessons with Edward.

My ears picked up the sound of a door, and a heartbeat. I went out to the living room, peering out the window. Ness was halfway across the lawn, wearing shorts and a long sleeve shirt. She had her arms wrapped around herself, and looking right at my house. She looked like she was waiting for something. I walked to the door, opening it and leaning on the jam. She watched me for a moment and turned, strolling towards the woods. I Recognized my cue, quickly catching up to her and following. My chest loosend just being near her, the pain receding slightly. We walked for miles, and I was sure she wanted to be out of Edward's hearing range.

We reached a small opening, and she sat in the dry grass. I followed suit, giving her some space.

"Nes-" I started.

"No Jacob. Let me speak." She cut me off. I shut up.

"First, I want to apologize for acting so childish. I was upset and I shouldn't of taken it out on you."

"Ness you weren't-"

"Im not done. That being said, I don't want this..incident to come between us. I just want to forget it and move on."

She finished, and looked up at me. I had missed her face, her eyes, her everything. In the moment I just wanted her back. I would give anything to have her in my arms again, but what kind of man would I be if I let her accept the fault.

"Can I talk now?" I asked her. She nodded. " You weren't being childish, I hurt your feelings and you had every right to be upset...That being said..Im sorry I hurt your feelings Ness, that wasn't my intention...I wasn't expecting you to show me..that, and I didnt..I wa-" I stumbled over words, I didn't know how to say this. Her small palm landed on my arm. Comforting.

 _What is it jacob?_

I faced her, squaring my shoulders and grabbed her hands. "Renesmee, I don't want you to think in any way that I dont want you, that's not why I pulled away."

 _Then why?_ Her small voice made its way into my head. I sighed. "Nessie I just don't think were ready..for that..yet." I could read the disappointment in her eyes.

 _Okay...can I ask you something?_

"You can always ask me anything." She hesitated, watching my face.

 _Well...I was just wondering if you felt that way at all...about me_.

I laughed, one short humorless laugh. Could she not see how very much I was absorbed by her. My hand came up, to caress her cheek.

"Yes. I feel that way hunny."

She smiled, placing her hand ontop of mine. "So it's not just me?"

"No Ness, its not just you." She knelt up, bringing herself closer and wrapped her slender arms around my neck. I held her tight, burying my face in her hair.

"I missed you."

"I missed you my Jacob."

"Are we okay?" I asked her. She leaned back, taking my hand and smiled at me.

"Ya, were okay. I know it's not just me anymore. That's enough.. for now." She got up, pulling me to my feet and we headed towards the house.

The following weeks were better, and in some ways worse. I had my Ness back, and thing's were mostly back to normal. There was a difference from knowing the other felt that way. I started questioning things I did, before I would hold her hand simply because I wanted to, know I thought about every action, weighing the consequences. I decided the best way to handle the situation was to stay far away from temptations. Not physically, cause I could never stay away from her. But theoretically, stay away from situations that might test my will.

It was worse because it seemed like that was exactly what Ness what trying to do. If she wasn't out she was with me. That part I didn't mind, oh no. It was the short shorts and the tanktops and..Bikinis that were torture. She would stroll around me all day, wearing the smallest clothes she owned. I tried to control my thoughts and actions. But everytime she caught me staring, she would smirk, like she knew exactly what she was diong.

I remembered one day last week, wakeing up to a Ness hovering above me. She smiled, happy and excited.

"Im making breakfast!" She exclaimed. I blinked, pushing the dreams from my head and stretched. When I looked back to her she was focused on my bare chest, her cheeks pinks. I coughed, raising one eyebrow. Her face got redder, but she just turned, skipping out of my room. True to form she had a pair of jean shorts on, making her long legs look incredible, and my stolen shirt. She didn't realize what that did to me, seeing her in my clothes. I layed in bed, trying to calm my over worked hormones, when that failed I got up and changed, putting on basketball shorts and a tshirt.

I made my way down the hall, turning the corner and stopped dead.

"Oh my god, what did you do?" She grinned sheepishly.

"I made breakfast!" It looked like a hurricane tore its way through my kitchen. Bowls and pans filled the sink, there was flour dusted on the countertop, and a pancake was stuck to the cealing. Gatsby was on the floor, playing with an empty egg shell. I stood frozen, shocked. Her face looked so proud, I couldn't even be mad.

"Don't move." I said, digging into my pocket and taking out my phone. I stepped back, getting the perfect shot as the pancake fell to the counter with a splat. She frowned, and I tried hard not to laugh. I walked up, placing my hands on her face.

"Thank you for making breakfast." She smiled again, turning to the stove and makeing me a plate. We ate in the living room, avoiding the mess. I put my plate down, leaning back and peering at the kitchen.

"You know we have to clean that, right?"

She grimaced, eyeing the sink.

"Ill start the dishes if you clean the flour?" I laughed at her plan, leaving me with the worst job. "Deal."

I grabbed are plates, adding them to the sink and pulling the trash over to the island. I heard the water turn on and grabbed the pancake, tossing it in the trash. I made my way around the kitchen, picking up the egg shells and wiping the counters. I picked up the bag of flour, turning to look back at Ness. I could never keep my eyes from her to long. She was concentrating, scrubbing a pan. Her hair was pulled back, piled high on her head. I made my way behind her, walking quietly. I momenterraly contemplated my actions, deciding it was worth it.

"Hey Ness?" I placed my palm on her hip, urging her to turn. She did, twisting her upper body to me, I raised my other hand, opening my palm and blew a big breath towards her.

The white flour settled over her shocked face, falling in her hair. I was one second ahead of her, but she had her half vampire reflexes on her side. I stepped back, preparing to beeline for the front door. Her hand was raised, a silver nozzle in her palm. I froze, weighing my options. They weren't good, and as if seeing my thoughts I was hit square in the face with a stream of cold water. I heard her laughter through the shock, surging forward and I tried to pry to nozzle from her hands. Water flew everywere, soaking us and the surrounding floor. I restled it from her, turning it downwards and over her head. She tried to shield herself, failing and gave up. I saw the thoughts swirling in her eyes, and unprepared, went down when she tackled me. The nozzle fell from my hand, and without pressure it shut off, stopping the flow of water.

I found myself laying on my floor in a big puddle, my back against the hardwood. My hands had reflexively reached towards her as we went down, securing her waist so she didn't get jostled. We were laughing, but I quickly stopped when I took in are situation. She was over me, her legs on either side of my hips. Her hands were braced on the floor near my head, her soft body pressed to mine. I didn't realize my grip had tightened, holding her to me. I was positive this moment would star in my dreams till I got to relive it.

She smiled, unphased by my stillness. The water fight had washed the flour from her, and her hair dripped on my face. Laughing, she pushed the loose strands behind her ear. She leaned forward, her lips inches away from my neck.

"I win." She whisperd, and kissed my cheek. She sat up, swinging her leg over me and stood up. She opened the front door, letting the hot air swirl around the house.

"Well were already wet, lets go for a swim?" She wrung her shirt out, stepping outside.

I followed her, tossing my phone on the coach and yanking of my shirt on the way out. I dropped it, and ran, flinging myself of the edge and canning balling into the pool. I came up, looking around. She was standing bye the edge, a fresh wave of moisture rolling down her face. She looked anoyyed, pushing the strands back from her face again. I gave her my best smile, and she grinned back, a spark in her eyes.

She reached infront of her, unbuttoning her jean shorts and ran her hands to the sides, pushing them down her wide hips. I gulped, and mentally scolded myself.

 _Just look away, Jake. Turn around_.

But I was rooted to the spot, my eyes on her. She had that small smirk on her lips that told me she was diong it on purpose.

They dropped to the ground, and she stepped out of them. Gripping her shirt bye the hem, she pulled up, slowly. Exposing inch bye inch of her creamy slender stomach. Images filled my head, my hands, following those curves. My lips, trailing across the smooth skin.

I was helpless, watching as her shirt-my shirt, was pulled up further, exposing her bikini top. Over her head it went, landing with her shorts. The image of her was imprinted in my brain. She was stunning, with the sun beating on her. She glowed subtly, her skin pale, but flushed. She wore a dark green two piece, only turtoring me further. I had a weakness for her in green, it was by far my favorite. Her bathing suit hugged her, covering but willing you too just imagine what was underneath.

I thanked the stars and universe that Edward wasn't home, out with Bella 'hunting'. I tried desperately to control my body's physical reaction to her, succeeding for the most part.

With one little satisfied smile she jumped in.

I was right when I thought that image of her hovering above me would star in my dreams. My dreams, my fantasies. I caught Edward's livid looks sometimes when it popped up randomly, but he didn't say anything. He knew it was more then my atttaction to her. He knew he could trust me with her life, doesn't mean he didn't get anoyyed as hell when I had dirty thoughts about his daughter.


	13. Chapter 13:Fight

A/N: read and review my lovely readers. Your reviews help this story flourish.

* * *

The summer passed slowly, most of my time being spent with Jacob and Ally. My driving lessons with Dad went good, and he decided to let me get my license. Well, he was going to acquire my license.

Most things with Jake and I had remained the same, there was some thing's I noticed after are talk. Like how his eyes would follow me around, or when dad's face would get angry seemingly for no reason, I had a hint Jake was behind those ones.

I felt lighthearted every time I thought of him, knowing that I wasn't the only one who felt this way. I knew when the time came for us it would be alittle tricky. It was bound to be, being so close for so many years.

I understood what Jake said, about not thinking we were ready. I wasn't sure if I agreed with his reasoning, I think I was more ready then he was, but I would be patient and give him time. At first it seemed like an easy enough thing to agree with. The more weeks that passed the more I felt the pull to him, at first I followed it. Wanting to be closer to him, we spent the summer together, swimming and watching movies and hanging out at his little home.

I found it increasingly difficult to keep a distance between us. When I was far away, I wanted to be closer. When I was closer, I wanted to feel him near me and press my lips to his. I had a feeling he was trying to talk him self out of his feelings for me. He was always careful, not holding my hand the way he use to, not hugging me as much, like he was always internally scolding himself.

Once he told me he felt that way I started to see some of it. The way his eyes traveled me when I was close bye, or the way they blateninly avoided me whenever I was wearing a bathing suit. It always gave me chills, to see the emotions flint across his face before he could control it.

School started again, and things settled. Me and Ally were in most classes again, and were barley inseparable. I was amazed how well she took to my family, she accepted each and every one of them, without a single question. She came over most days after school, studying or just hanging out. Jacob started his collage courses, so he usually didn't get home till around dinner time.

My 8th birthday passed, and Mom and Dad got me a brandnew car. It was a Tesla model S in a shiny cherry red. I was beyond excited, even tho I had denied birthday presents for the last two years. When I got older I simply said it was unnecessary, there was no need for so many presents. Instead I usually got one present from everybody.

I convinced Mom to let us take it and visit back home for the weekend, as long as I didn't sleep in the same room as Jake, I rolled my eyes at that. He was to much of a gentleman. Jacob was in love with my new car, and I let him take it for the test run that weekend, driving out of state and into washington. We made it to the rez, and staying with Billy. I had always loved visiting Billy, he accepted me and the imprint bond without hesitation, he was so excited to see us. He had dinner cooking and the coach made up already. Jake insisted I take his room and he would stay on the coach, I told him there was really no need, it wasn't a big deal if we shared a room. His dark tan turned pink and studderd, saying Edward would kill him.

I layed down that night, listening to his loud heartbeat on the other side of the wall. Jake had started updating his fathers house once the garage took off. Nothing to grand, Billy would never allow it. Just upgrading some of the appliances and expanding his bedroom, so he was atleast able to fit a queen size bed.

That saterday we visited Charlie and Jake decided I was old enought to attend the pack bonefire. I was excited to see everybody again, and I was eager for them to see me, I was finally grown up. I showerd that afternoon, wrapping my hair in a towel and a robe around my body. I headed to Jake's room, peaking my head into the living room and telling him the shower was free. He looked anywear but me, saying thank you and I frowned.

Latly I had started to wonder if maybe he didn't feel the same way, he seemed to have no problem around me anymore. Not noticing me the way he use to, there was a time when seeing me in just a robe would of had him practically drueling. Maybe he wasn't falling harder for him like i was. The idea had me worried. I dried my hair into perfect ringlets, flipping them around till I liked them just right. I searched through my clothes, finding the perfect outfit. I picked out a pair of light low rise skinny jeans, putting them on, and pulling on a short white tank top. It was alittle tight, hugging me and stopping short so about an inch of skin showed around my body. I added my dark brown leather boots, and shrugged on a red flannel shirt, folding the sleeves and leaving the front open. I added my favorite necklace, stroking the engraving on the back. I even added alittle mascara, making my eyes look bigger and some light lip gloss. Half an hour later we were in my car heading to the beach. Jake had been quiet, not saying much on the ride.

"Do i look okay?" I asked. I hated feeling this way, insecure. He didn't look at me, just smiled and said.

"You look great Ness, well be there soon."

We showed up and I was assaulted by the sheer mass of people who showed up. Every one of my Quileute family members was there. Emily and Sam were there with there two kids, and Paul and Rachel even had their four year old year. Everybody gushed on how grown and beautiful I looked. I blushed alot that night, once it got dark all the little kids and grown ups called it quites, but most of the brother's stayed. Everybody ate, teasing one brother or another. I was really excited about seeing leah, she was pretty rough when I was growing up. But over time she came to like me, and I thought of us as freinds.

Jacob mostly wanderd around, talking to everybody and he was just like his old self. Relaxed and boisterous. I frowned at him, and leah walked up.

"What's with the face?" I blushed, and looked away.

"Nothing." She looked around us, then put her arm around me, steering me away. "Lets go for a walk." We walked down the beach, finding a sand dune far away from the party.

"Know..what's with the face?" I sighed, and thought about trying to ignore it again. But it could be nice, to talk about it with someone that could understand fully.

"Its...complicated.." I said. She laughed.

"Isn't it always, is it you and Jake? I assume from the look on your face it is." Leah was always good at reading people, I sighed.

"Ya, well during spring we talked about..us. He said that...he liked me that way, but he wasn't ready..and its just that, well...I am." She nodded seriously, as if getting it. That makes one of us.

"And it's not that...I dont know, I know it can't be easy, and I understand..but hes just soo..good at controlling himself. It's like I dont even affect him...it just makes me think that maybe he doesnt feel the same way.." I sighed, looking behind my shoulder at him. He was laughing with Jared and his wife Kim.

"Ness I can't begin to understand everything, but I do know one thing. You don't share his thoughts like the rest of us do, he can't think about anything but you. That being said, I haven't seen him take his eyes of you for more then one minute all night. But he's a man, and they can be stupid. Hes probably scared, to make that transition." She put her arm around me again, patting my shoulder. "Just give him some time, he'll come around." I nodded, but it was the same responce. Be patient. I was always being patient.

We walked back, rejoining the party. Seth came forward, throwing his arm around my waist. I laughed, he had always been one of my favorite people.

"What's going on in your world kid?" I growled at him, shoving my elbow into his side.

"Ouch aright, dam. Your not a kid, I get it." He laughed, rubbing his side. I smiled. "Really tho, Ness you look incredible, so grown up. Hell if Jake didn't imprint on you I might try to steal you myself." He winked, stage whispering as if every male here couldn't hear him.

"And what makes you think you could succeed?" I said, laughing.

"Well I mean, look at me? Who would resist this?" He pointed to his face, giving me a big grin.

"I don't know, I don't think your my type." We walked around the fire, finding Jake standing with his hands in his pockets and staring at the flames.

"Why? Cause im not freakishly huge like this one?" He asked, looking at Jake. He looked down at us, taking one look at Seth with his arm wrapped around my waist and his face morphed into one of anger. He folded his huge arms against his chest and glared down at Seth. Seth recoiled immediately and I glared back at Jake. He couldn't hold me back with a ten foot stick and be mad at Seth at the same time. I turned my back on him, trying to ignore my anger bubbling up.

"You know Seth, I think you would really like my freind Ally. Definitely your type."

"Is she hot?" He asked and I couldn't help but laugh. " I guess you could say that, I wouldn't really know. She's strawberry blonde tho, very beautiful and classy."

He grinned, smiling. I felt Jake's hand land on my shoulder, and irritation swelled up, I shrugged it off.

"Ill have to come visit you guys soon." He said, and glanced at Jake. He must have seen something on Jake's face, cause he quickly excused himself. I tried to control my emotions, but they were simmering at the surface. He grasped my wrist, turning me towards him.

"Whats wrong?" He asked.

"Nothing."

"Bullshit, talk to me." He said, stepping closer. I breathed, balling my hands. His hand didn't release me arm, he just towed me away from the group, up towards the car.

"What's the problem Ness, and don't say nothing cause that's a load and you know it. " The anger bubbled, spilling over the surface.

"What's your problem Jacob. You say all this about not being ready and then almost bite Seth's head off for touching me." I snapped back.

"He had no reason to put his hands on you."

"Oh would you give it a rest, he's a freind. He's your freind for christ sake. And just so were clear I am my own person, and I will say who dam well touches me or not. I may be your imprint but your the one the one who didn't want to go there." I was so angry my hands shook, and I stepped back, needing some air.

"That's not what I meant and you know it. This has nothing to do with that, we both agreed-" I laughed harshly, cutting him off.

"This has everything to do with that. Your jealous for not dam reason. And no, WE did not agree on anything. YOU decided that YOU wanted to wait for some reason."

"Ness your to young, your not ready." He said, nearly spitting the words out. I growled, and adrenaline coursed through me.

"This is because of my age, are you fucking kidding me Jacob. Do I look like im 8! No, im a grown fucking woman and can make my own dam decisions. And just so were clear, im not the one who's not ready, thats clearly you." I practically growled the words at him, and turned around, heading towards my car.

"Were do you think your going?!" He asked angrily. I opend the drivers door, turning around to look at him. "Back to Billys house, im walking away before I say something I regret. Walk home." I snapped and got in, slamming the door.

I made it back in minutes, heading to Jake's room quietly. Billy was already fast asleep, so I changed and crawled into bed, trying to keep calm. I don't know how things had gone so wrong so quick. A couple tears escaped and I wiped them away. I laid in bed, tired but I knew I couldn't fall asleep till he was home safe.

It took longer then it should have, it was almost an hour and a half till I heard the soft crunch of footsteps coming across the ground. They were slow as he made his way into the house, hesitating as he crossed the hall way and knocked softly on my door. As much as I wanted him home safe, I knew I didnt want to talk to him. I stayed silent, with my head buried in his pillow and the blanket pulled up over my head.

"Renesmee..are you awake hunny?" His voice was muffled, coming from the other side of the door. "Im sorry." He whisperd, then walked to the living room. I heard the springs creak from the sofa and I settled in to sleep.

I woke the next morning, dressing in comfortable clothes and pulling on a hoody. I packed up my things and stalled as much as possible till I had to leave the bedroom. Billy was at the table with Jake, finishing their breakfest.

"Do you want some food darling?" Billy asked me. Jake didn't look up, just kept his head down.

"No thank you billy, we have to head out soon. Is your bag packed?" He nodded his head, and I walked to the sofa, grabbing the bag and walked outside, tossing them in the trunk. I lingered by the car enjoying the fresh fall air, and avoiding his presence. I heard plates clattering and running water, so I headed inside to say goodbye, passing the keys to Jake without looking at him, and hugging billy.

I waited in the car while Jake said goodbye, I was nervous to be in the vehicle with him for so long, the normal distance between are old home and are new home was around 11 hours, but with my family or jake driving it took about 7 hours. He got in, starting it up and pulled out. We were quite while we drove out of forks, and I leaned againts the window. Thirty minutes, an hour..an hour and a half, the tension was building.

"Are we ganna talk about what happend?" His voice broke the silence and I breathed, relived.

"What do you want to talk about?" I asked. I wasnt giving in so easy tho, I was still mad.

"Ness.." he sighed. " Look..your right, I was jealous last night, and you were also right that I didn't have a reason to be. I know that, and im sorry." He said. I nodded.

"And?"

"And I would never dream of telling you what to do and who could...touch you." He sounded pained when he finshed, and I understood.

"And?"

"And...im sorry that I assumed you agreed with how I felt about us..I didn't relize that you could feel differently, I thought it was just...hormones."

I laughed, without humor. " I forgive you for being jealous, I can't say that I never do so that wouldn't be fair. And your right, you can't tell me what to do, but just so were clear, there is no one on this planet who would be able to ever put there hands on me besides you." I said confidently. " and it's not just your fault, I should of told you how I felt about are...arrangment. At the time I didn't really mind, but I don't understand it now. You say im to young but you know that's not true, not physically and not mentally. You say im not ready but Jacob I i think we both know that's not true either. If your not ready then your not, but don't use me as an excuse." I said, finishing my dialogue. He nodded and thinks were mostly quite for the rest of the ride.


	14. Chapter 14: New Normal

A/N: My patient lovely readers, i Promise the time is coming. Were right around the corner from the big show.

* * *

After are first real fight thing's were a little tense between us. It was hard sometimes to be so near him, so I retreated. I spent more and more time in my room, or with Ally. I hated to see the rejection everytime I slipped up, to know that he simply didn't want me the same way I wanted him. That was the only real conclusion I could reach, cause it would be impossible, if he felt the way I did, to stay away from me so much.

My daily visits turned to once a week visits, I stopped in to check on my babys, but it was usually while he was away at school. I spent more time with my parents, playing piano with Dad and reading with Mom, but they were busy alot. They were a happily married couple who couldn't stay away from eachother, thankfully they usually left before I heard to much.

School was normal, it was starting to bore me, the excitement I once felt about being emerged in human interaction turned to anoyyence with the hormone riddled adolescents. The only class that ever held my interest was art, and Ally had a blast turtoring me in health because we were studying sex ed this year. You would think normal school's have health once in the four years, with sex ed being a couple weeks course. Oh no, we had health every year and the courses took months.

I tried finding thing's to accommodate my time with, grandma installed another book case in my room, holding my expanding collection. She suprised me with plans for a medium size shed she was planning on building in the backyard. It would sit in the far left side of the property, and would be a special spot for me to store my paintings and I could set my easel there. She laughed when she told me, looking at the expanding pile of paintings in the corner of my room.

She had it built and finished in less then a week. I really loved it, it was a pretty big size, probably around the size of Jacob's living room. It had special storage racks on one side, and my easel on the other, it was made from a light natural wood, with the inside painted white and large windows, the casings and cabinets painted a pale pink. There was a plush love seat in the front corner, and wide double doors opened to outside. It was peaceful and bright, and the perfect spot.

So I spent the following months painting, reading and generally avoiding. The more time went on the more upset I grew. I was upset about the way thing's had gone, how far apart I felt from Jake these days. I had let my feelings for him get in the way of are freindship. So I decided one day I was done, I missed my best freind. It was early spring, and summer was around the corner.

I got home from school and changed, made my way to his home and laid on the coach, waiting for him to get home. I must of fell asleep, cause next thing I knew I opened to my eyes to his face, just a foot away from mine. Emotion immediately bubbled in me, rushing over the edge and I sat up, hugging him tightly. My eyes welled and spilled over.

"Nessie what's wrong? Shhh, its okay. Dont cry hunny. Its alright." He sat down, pulling me to him and holding me tightly. He stroked my hair, rocking us slightly.

"Please tell me what's wrong hunny." His voice was hard, worried. I sniffed, trying rein myself in. I knew I must of been freaking him out. I opened my palm, trying to find the right words.

 _Iv missed you._ I thought. I didn't think I could get more then that out.

He laughed once, holding me tigher. " Iv missed you two hunny, im so sorry I let this happen." I shook my head, but held him closer.

 _No jacob. This wasn't just you, I let..other things get in the way of are freindship. Thats wasn't fair. Iv missed you so much. Im so sorry_.

He held me for a while, and I tried to ignore my racing heart, and the feeling of his body pressed to mine.

I pulled back after a while, feeling overwhelmed. I stayed with him that afternoon, making dinner in his house and we stayed up watching movies. I remembered sitting on the coach near him, my arm brushing his. I felt so relaxed being near him again, I woke up sometime later, in Jake's arms being carried. He brought me to my room, laying me on the bed and pulling my covers up.

"Jacob, My Jacob." I mumbled.

"Shh, go to sleep hunny." He said calmly, stroking my hair. I felt his lips brush my cheek, I couldn't remember when the last time he did that was, and I was pulled back under.

Thing's went mostly back to normal, at least pre fight normal. It was still frustrating being with him and not being able to really be with him the way I wanted. But atleast I had my bestfreind back, and that was the most important thing.

We were studying one night, for finals. He got out of school a week before I did, so his finals started tomorrow. We were sprawled around the living room, a pizza box on the coffee table.

"You know, I think next year I might take some of my required classes online. I don't really like having to drive back and forth everyday."

"As long you think you'll have the time for that. It seemed to work out last time." I smiled at him, happy for his accomplishments. He grinned back, and my heart flutterd. He smiled bigger and I blushed.

"Well if I do that ill have time in the morning's to drive you again."

"You just wanna drive my Tesla." I teased. He grabbed another slice of pizza, standing up and stretching. I watched him, watched the way his muscles moved over his body. I sighed, looking down at my home work. He sat on the coach, watching me go over my notes. I felt his eyes on me, and I glanced up.

"What?" I asked self conscious. He just smiled, serenely.

"Your kinda incredible." I blushed, looking down. I should of known better then to push my luck, but I was just a glutton for punishment.

"Hey Jake...have you..uh, thought anymore about..you know?" His face fell and my insides dropped. I immediately regretted bringing it up.

"I just..don't understand it. Why?" I hurried, trying to salvage are night.

"Ness, its just..what we have is so important. That bond we shared, the imprint its sacred, and its the most important part of me, and I have to take care of it, protect it. Which means we need to wait till things are right, I have to make sure I do it right." His words made sense, but somehow they didn't seem to fit right. I understood what he meant about are bond, it was a huge part of me, and if thing's somehow got messed up I would be devastated, but his words didn't seem like they were meant to protect, more like they were there to avoid. I nodded, keeping myself calm and relaxed. I had to be grown about this, if I broke down everytime I thought about it I would get no were.

"I think your wrong tho." I said calmly. "Not about the imprint, I fully agree on that one. You might have imprinted on me, but I feel that, I can't live without you the same way you can't live without me. But I think your using it as a crutch, the bond is there to tell us what we need, not to come between us." His eyes stared into mine, watching me talk. He seemed speechless, just looking at me even after I was done talking.

"I just..need alittle more time." I was expecting the awnser, so it didn't sting as much. But it still hurt. I nodded, getting up and gathering my thing's. I smiled, trying to show him I wasn't that upset.

"Im ganna head to bed, ill see you tomorrow Jacob." I walked over, and kissed his hot cheek, trailing my hand down his arm and stepped away, making my way outside.

I laid in bed with Jacob on my mind. I knew I had made the right decision to go to him when I felt him slipping away, I knew that even if it killed me I wouldn't ever let him go. If he decided that he would never be ready for us I would have to accept that awnser no matter what. I agreed about are bond, it was the most important thing to me, it was my foundation, without him I would shake and collapse. But to me that was the reason I didn't understand him. He says he needs to protect it, and wait till..what? But he doesn't understand that's exactly why it will work, are connection runs so deep, its so engraved in the very core of me how would things ever not work out? We were made for eachother, mind, body and soul. Isnt that what the imprint is for? To find your other half?

I rolled over, trying to fall asleep. I sighed and got up, making my way over to the window seat, and looking down into his room, he was outcold. Sprawled across his bed, his broad chest bare and the blanket pulled around his hips. I battled with myself, but lost, getting up and grabbing a sketch pad from my desk and sitting back down.

I new sleep was distant so I concentrated on my sketch. Starting with his outline, he truly was huge. It amazed me how many bands of muscles wrapped themselves around his body. Maybe if he wasn't so tall it wouldn't be so drastic. I moved to his face, drawing the line of his strong jaw, his straight nose. His eyes were closed, his face peacefull. I loved watching him sleep, his carefully controlled features melted away and gave way to his almost childlike innocence. I was thankful for my extended eye sight from the vampire part of me, it allowed me to see the long eyelashes resting on his cheeks, the soft form of his lips. They were parted slighlty, for once not hanging wide open with a snore coming out. I traveled down his neck, across his shoulers and down each arm. His hands, like the rest of him were large, rough from years of working with them, but I knew for a fact how gentle those hands could be, how soft they were on my cheek, or how gently they engulfed one of my own. I worked back down his chest, carefully drawing out every abdominal muscle, the slight slope of his waist. My heart started to beat faster, pumping through my body and I tried to ignore it. I sketched his lower abdomen, following the dark trail of hair that started from his bellybutton and disappeared under his covers, I moved on to the deep V, tracing that till it to disappeared. Alittle frustrated, I moved on to the covers drapped over his lower body, finding the outline of him under the sheet. I stared at the sketch, trying to find any anomalies. When I was satisfied there were none I got up, feeling the tiredness creeping its way into me. I crawled into bed, putting the sketch pad under my pillow and pulling the blankets over my head. I was out in minutes.


	15. Chapter 15: Realization

A/N: This one's for all you patient people. Reminder that this story is rated M for a reason. You have been warned. Enjoy!

* * *

I was driving myself utterly insane. It was torture, but as long as it was just me, I could deal. I didn't care how much pain and frustration I had to go throught, if it kept her safe I would do anything.

That's what I told myself, every morning, afternoon and night. The thing was I could feel myself cracking, I could feel the wolf in me winning out. I worked so hard, to fight back the beast. Two years, I had denied him any form of her. But my will was crumbling, slowly my defense's were thinning.

The longer I tried to fight my attraction, my feelings the stronger they grew. The sight of her made my whole body ache to be near her, to touch her and pull her close. But more then that I hated knowing I was upseting her. No matter how justified I felt in my choices I was hurting her. I could tell, when she would struggle internally with being close to me, I knew she was trying to control herself.

I felt like I was constantly in a state of frustration. My body constantly battled with my mind, it always wanted her. I had given up trying to ignore it, taking any chance I got to allow my eyes to roam her body. She starred in my dreams ever night, leaveing me more frustrated then before.

One particular intense night I woke up in the middle night, over heated from the hot summer air and laid in bed, trying to calm my body. The image of her was stained behind my lids tho, my imagination had run wild with a scene I imagined many times. That particular morning she had made breakfast, sometime last summer. I rememberd the water fight, her tackling me and landing on my back with her above me. That's were my imagination took control.

I reached up, holding her face in my hands and pulled her gently to me, pressing my lips firmly to hers. She responded enthusiastically, lowering herself down onto me, laying her soft body ontop of mine. I groaned, kissing her harder and wrapped my arms around her waist. She pulled back, standing up and grabbing my hand, she pulled me to the couch, grabbing my shirt with her little hands and pulled up, yanking the wet fabric of, then put her hand to my chest, pushing me down on the couch and straddled my thighs, pressing against me and kissing me hard.

A small moan escaped her mouth and I lost it, one hand tangled in her thick hair, gripping her to me and the other slid around to her back, under her shirt and pressed against her warm skin. I pulled her flush against me, her curves molding to me and she slid farther up my lap, bringing her body closer everywhere and I knew she had to feel my excitement, cause I felt her. The amazing pressure her body brought to mine had me nearly panting. She pulled her face away, gasping for air and tilted her head back. My lips locked to her delicate neck, trailing kisses up and down, she shiverd when I reached a tender spot behind her ear, and I sucked lightly. She moaned again, louder this time, it only spurred me on. Both hands were know under her top, running up her back. I felt the small string and tie, she must be wearing a bathing suit. I leaned back, looking into her warm chocolate eyes. She was breathless, her hands on my chest and she had never looked more stunning.

Her eyes held mine, but her hands moved, grasping her shirt and slowly pulled it up, over her head. She sat back on my thights, giving me a view of her perfect body, she had a dark green bikini top on, that hugged her breast and left me wanting it off. I pulled her back to me, kissing her again and are tongue's tangled, fighting for dominance. My body craved more pressure, more of her, but the angle of the couch didn't allow for much wiggle room. My hands slid down her back, over her firm ass and gripped her, I stood quickly, supporting her and she wrapped her legs around my waist. I walked quickly to my room, depositing her on the bed and climbed over, laying my body ontop of hers. Her legs opened to cradle me between them, and she moaned, wrapping her arms around me. My hands roamed her body, stroking her skin and listening to the breathy noises. She whimpered once, and wrapped her legs around me again, pulling herself up and grinding into me.

That was when I woke up, panting heavily and trying to calm my painful erection. Usually I just had to think of other thing's, and eventually it would go away. My body was so worked up nothing would work, not even thinking about Edward. I got up, making my way to my bathroom and stepping in the shower, letting the water run down my body.

I breathed, and closed my eyes, but all I could see was Ness, laying infront of me, her body begging me to touch it. Her moans filled my ears, the feeling of her body pressed to mine even in a dream. This was getting me no where, frustrated I growled, smacking my palm on the tile. It cracked under my hand, and I sighed.

I knew what I needed, I was to pent up, wound to tight. My body needed some form of release, I didn't know I felt, about diong it to thoughts of her. It wasn't the first time, but I didn't do it often. I let my hand fall down to my body, making quick work of the tension and frustration. I cleaned up after, making my way back to bed, and falling asleep quickly.

I continued to fight with myself, denying the fact that I was loosing the battle. Every day, every glance of her was a blow to my thin self control, I didn't know how much more I could hold out. I started my second year of college, but opted for a mostly online course. I had to go to campus once a week, other then that my courses were online. I did have a feeling of pride whenever I thought of how far id come with my plan. I had a good knack for this buisness thing, and we were already making improvements to the shop back home. It was running so smooth, everytime I looked at my bank account I was shocked. I had more money then I had ever seen, and I didn't even know what to do with it. I kept it in the bank, letting it build up.

The morning of Nessie's 9th birthday I woke up, and after shaking of another dream about her I got dressed, making my way into my kitchen and searching for some food. I had left over pizza, eating it cold and grabbing my keys. I headed to the garage, pulling out my dodge and waited in the front for Ness. I was happy she still let me drive her, it was the only real alone time I had with her.

The front door opened, and she stepped onto the porch and closing it behind her. She was always gorgeous, her school uniform not diong much to hide her curves. Her long coppery hair was a wild curly mass, and her face, still lit up when she saw me despit what I was putting her through. She bounded down the steps and towards me, I couldn't help myself, my arms opened wide and she fit herself into my arms perfectly. I hugged her tightly, burying my face in her hair. I missed feeling her so close, missed when everything was right in the world. Her heart beat furiously against me and I didn't want to let go.

"Happy birthday."

She sighed, and stepped back, distangled herself. I frowned, hurt that she so clearly didn't want to be in my arms. Of course she doesn't want to be in your arms stupid. Your hurting her. I opened her door, waiting till she got in and went around to my side. I slid in, turning the engine on and pulling out of the drive way. I drove for about ten minutes, when I felt her small hand on my arm.

 _Whats wrong Jacob? Your not usually quite_. Her voice made its way in my head, questioning. I was suprised she had noticed but I told her the truth.

"Im making you unhappy, and I dont know how to fix it." Her hand disappeared, cutting of my connection from her thoughts. She sighed, sounding exasperated.

"Jacob, your not making me unhappy, what your diong is makeing me unhappy. I don't understand why your still diong this. I got it before, what you said, but your wrong and all its diong is making us both unhappy. Why?" I wanted to tell her, make her see. But I wasn't even sure if I did anymore. Did I truly belive she was to young? No, I relized. She's not. She's a grown woman, she has been for a while. So its not that. Then why? Why couldn't I just end this pain and make thing how they should be?

" Nessie..." I sounded frustrated, even to my own ears. Her face contorted, into one of anger. I pulled into the school, parking and turning to face her. I saw her hand come up and wipe a single tear from her cheek, my heart broke. I could deal with my own pain, if it meant protecting her, but this? This I couldn't do.

I reached out, catching her hand in mine. Her emotions flowed throught are touch, and it was like a punch to the gut. Knocking the wind from me, love, desire, pain, rejection, depression. The feelings burned there way into me, causeing me physical pain, my imprint was feeling this, and it was because of me.

She yanked her hand back, her cheeks turning pink and grabbed the handle, stepping of the car.

"Renesmee." My voice cracked, the pain showing throught.

"Have a good day Jacob." She said, and closed the door. I watched her leave, heading into the building. I couldn't move yet, trying to control the anger flowing through me. I knew I needed to get home before I lost all sense. I managed to start the car, peeling out of the parking lot and racing towards home.

I made it in record time, leaving the car in the drive way and taking off into the woods. I phased mid stride, leaving scrapes behind and ran into the forest.

I felt something deep in me, cracking and splintering. How could I be diong the right thing if it was hurting us so much, what would happen, if one day she decided it was to much, she had a choice, she could leave if she truly wanted to. Would it come to that, the longer I kept up this notion that I was diong this for her? I couldnt keep this up, this..what, this lie? No, it wasn't a lie. I belived that what I was diong was for the best, but what if i was wrong. What if all I was diong was causeing more pain, driving a wedge between us that couldn't be repaired.

I had to accept the fact that I wasn't diong this for her, it was clear to me I was wrong, she might have been only alive for 9 years, but we all know that didn't matter, for what ever reason it was clear to me that she was ready for this, for us.

So why was I so afraid? Why was I the one who didn't know how to do this? I knew I wanted her, not just physically. It was so much more then that, I wanted her by my side everyday, I wanted to wake up with her in my arms, I wanted to watch her walk down the isle, with her father on her arm.

I headed back towards the house, slowing down at the forest line. The scrapes were cleaned up and in there place was a pair of shorts, and my cell phone resting on top. I phased, pulling on the shorts and picking up my phone. I clicked the home button, pulling up a message.

IM GOING TO PICK UP RENESMEE TODAY. -EDWARD.

Alright, I thought, heading to my place and starting my schoolwork. Everybody had a week off from school next week, do to some historical festival thing they have every five years. Fortunately for me online classes didn't count.

I heard the sound of tires on the gravel, and listened for her heartbeat.

"Alright grandma" I heard her call out, and her footsteps disappeared into the house. I stared at my computer screen, trying to listen for her. I leaned back, glancing out the window into hers. She stood there, her hair tied up on her head looking right down at me. She smiled slightly and walked away, out of my view. I finished my lesson, and made my way to the big house, walking into the kitchen, and sitting at the island.

"That smells amazing Esme." She smiled, taking the chicken out of the pan.

"Thank you, would you go get Renesmee for dinner?" I nodded, and headed upstairs, knocking on her door.

"Come in." Her soft voice called

I opened the door, stepping in and she turned around, a suprised look on her face. My eyes fell to her painting, it was me and her, on her 6th birthday. She was twirling in her dress, me standing next to her. It always amazed me to see her paintings of me. To see they way she saw me, throught her own eyes. I walked over, and couldn't resist resting my hand on her hip, pulling her into my side.

"I remember that day." I said, she rested her head on my chest, and the pain eased. I just didn't have it in me to keep her away.

"That was my favorite birthday." She said, melting into me. I sighed, and put my other arm around her, holding her to me.

"Esme says dinner's ready." I said quitly. She just nodded.

"Jacob, im sorry about this morning." She started, but I was shaking my head before she finished her sentance. There was no way in hell she was being blamed for this.

"Don't be sorry Ness, your right. I am diong this, its my fault." I said.

She pulled away from me, grabbing my hand and ignoring my comment.

" Come on lets eat." She said, pulling me downstairs, into the kitchen and dinning room. The table held all of her favorite things. Her family was sorted around the table and she made her way inbetween her parents, I sat across from her, piling my plate with food and started eating.

"What's all this grandma?" Ness asked.

"I figured since we weren't going be here for a week I'd make your favorites, beside its still your birthday." I was a little confused about what she meant, they were going somewhere? I looked at Edward, and he nodded quickly but smiled, so I knew nothing was wrong, probably just an extended hunting trip. He nodded again.

"Thank you very much." My Ness said, she was always polite, perfect manners. One of us had to. I ate my food, savoring the taste.

"So Renesmee, how was school? " Edward asked, I listened but kept eating.

"It was pretty normal, nothing special. I have an exam in history after break and im working on a art project." She said, her voice getting excited when she mentioned art.

"What happend at lunch?" Edward asked. I looked up, catching my attention know. Something happened?

"Just the usual." She said, to calmly. I noticed the lie from a mile away, she was never one to lie.

"Then why were you so anoyyed by this brad?" I froze, my fork halfway to mouth.

"Oh...um, its just this guy that asked me out...again." she mumbled, getting embarrassed and looking down.

"Again? How many times has this happend Renesmee?" Bella asked, worry in her tone. I was greatful for there questions, because my mouth was frozen shut. I put my fork down, looking down also but listening intently.

"Uh...oh just once or twice...a week." She said. I swallowed the lump in my throat. A week? How had she never told me this?

"And what about other...boys.?" Edward asked, I cringed. Of course there were others. How could there not be, just look at her. What had I done?

"Well...ya, there's been a couple." She said, reluctantly.

" 8? " Edward asked. How could I have let this happen, this whole time.

"Y-yes..so what" she said, her voice cracking. She was irritated, that much I could tell. But why? Was it because she didn't want me to know?

"And what do you say to these...admirer's?" Edward asked.

"I politely decline there invitation. Why does it matter!?" She snapped, looking away.

"Well is because you've never been on a date or is it because you don't like them in a romantic way? " Edward asked. I felt the anger start to boil, was he trying to kill me? Or did he just get off on watching me suffer? I kept my head down but glanced up at her.

"Umm..the second I guess." She said, sounding unsure.

"So, say someone from school asked you on a date, and you did like them. Would you say yes?" Pain rippled through me, how had I never thought of this before? I waited, with my heart in my throat, for the final blow.

"If...if someone I cared about, and I was intrested in asked me out, then yes. I would go." She said, a note of finality in her tone and she picked her fork, eating her food. I couldn't move yet, it wasn't exactly the awnser I was expecting. She didn't say she would go out with who ever, she didn't even say they would be from school, just that she would have to care for him. The thought of anybody taking her out, anybody but me getting any part of her beautiful heart sickened me. I had to leave, before I would either throw up or phase. I stood abruptly, walking to the back door and jumping of the deck. I phased midair, leaving a set of shredded clothes behind for the secound time that day. I ran to clear my head, till night fell and made my way back to my room, pulling on some shorts and quickly fell asleep.

I woke up shortly after, at first I was confused, not understanding what had woken me up. I turned instinctively, glancing up at my imprint's window. She sat on her window seat, curled up in Bella's arms. My heart clenched, sensing her pain but I didn't understand what for. I watched as she leaned back, the moonlight hitting her face and she wiped tears from her eyes. I felt her pain double mine, I knew I had caused this. Somehow, i had to fix this.


	16. Chapter 16: The Beginning

I stared into the mirror, taking in my form. Physically, I was an adult. Had been for two years. I had stopped aging on my 7th birthday. Grampa Carlisle estimated my physical age to be around 20. Depending on how I dressed, I could get away with 17, or 22.

I had inherited my father's height, at almost 5 feet 9 inches, I was tall for a woman. But compared to the men in my family, especially Jake. I was tiny. He towered over everybody with his 6'7 height. I smoothed the button down shirt over my torso, part of my school uniform, and contemplated skipping. It was my birthday, after all, and today was the last day before seasonal break. If I asked Jake, he would take me somewear. Part of this imprint thing meant he had to give me what I wanted, right?

I sighed, and grabed my bag, banishing that thought. It was selfish, and I knew it wasn't fair. Besides, if that was how it worked things would be different between us.

"Happy birthday to me" I mutterd to myself. Thinking about how complicated thing's had gotten with Jake and I. I had been alive 9 years, today. Jake had been there, almost everyday since then. But the past couple years had proved to be difficult, still he was there when it counted.

I walked over towards the big picture window and sat on my window seat, looking down into his home. Often when I was overwhelmed I would sit by the window and watch Jake. It use to be so easy, like breathing around him. He was such an amazing big brother when I was younger, giveing me candy when mom said no, and laughing when we got caught. When I got older he was my best freind, I could tell him anything, and he helped me with so much.

But a couple years ago my feelings started to change, and it got harder. That was around my 7th birthday, but I didn't tell him right away, im sure he knew alittle, he knows me so well. After I realized I didn't now what to do, did I act differently, or did I ignore it. I tryd to ignore it for a while, and when it didn't go away I decided to analyze it. I think I got that from dad, I was always trying to analyze things. The most it did was keep me busy for a couple months. I didn't get much from it tho, it was simple. It's just Jacob.

I didn't see him in his place, so I grabbed my phone and left my room, making my way downstairs. Mom and Dad were in the big room, sitting on the sofa talking quitly to themselves. They got up when I made it down the stairs, mom pulled me into a hug.

"Happy birthday Renesmee." She passed me to dad. "Thanks " I knew my voice was quite and emotionless. It had been getting harder to be happy about mundane things. I use to love going to school, and having birthdays. Know I wanted school to be over, and birthdays were just another day. "Ill see you guys later." I tried to give them a genuine smile, but my mom's face was worried so I dont know if I managed.

I opened the front door, stepping onto the porch and closing it behind me. Jake was there, leaning against the side of his car waiting to drive me to school, like most morning. I had gotten my license last year, but i knew he loved diong it, so I let him. His smile was breathtaking, and one of the only thing's to make me feel better. I bounded down the steps and towards him. He was wearing a white v neck tshirt, and dark wash jeans. His arms opened wide and I couldn't help but fit myself into them. Everything was right in those arms. I breathed lighter, and smiled easier. I buried my face against his hot collar bone, and his arms wrapped tightly against me. His breath was heavy against my hair and his heart pounded almost to the same rythem of my own. It had been a long time since hed hugged me like this. I still didn't understand why we were fighting it so hard. No, not we. He.

"Happy Birthday." He said quietly.

I sighed, and distangled myself. The longer now, the more pain later. He frowned slighlty but opened my door for me. I slid in, settling myself in for the long ride to school. He got in the driver's side, turning on the car and following the path to the rode. We were quite, and that wasn't usally something he knew how to do.

I placed my hand on his arm, opening my mind to him. _What's wrong Jacob? Your not usually quiet._

He frowned but glanced at me. "Im making you unhappy, and I dont know how to fix it." I took my hand back, nothing good could come of that. I sighed.

"Jacob, your not making me unhappy, what your diong is makeing me unhappy. I dont understand why your still diong this. I got it before, what you said, but your wrong and all its diong is making us both unhappy. Why?" I didn't really except a response, iv asked him this before after my 8th birthday and I never got anywhere. I sighed, turning away from him and looking out the window.

"Nessie..." he sounded frustrated. I didn't care, I was mad, and tired. Growing up everybody told me how young I was. Not to rush things, be patient. I did, I always listened and was a good girl. When I started to like Jake I behaved myself and acted like a mature lady. When I started noticing jake, notice me in that way, I was thrilled. But I behaved and didn't push things. After he told me he wasn't ready I understood. I didn't like it, cause I didn't think that was it. It wasn't that Jake didn't want to be with me, it was that he didnt know how to let go of the little girl and embrace the woman. He said that the bond we shared was sacred, and he had to take care of it, which meant waiting till things were right. But I was tired of waiting and being good. I spent my whole life being good, I just wanted to be with the man I loved. Sometime between relizing I liked him as more then a freind, and him saying we had to wait, I had fallen for him. I always loved Jacob, but I was falling in love with him. Why was that so wrong?

We pulled into the parking lot of the school, and I tried to calm myself, wiping a single tear from my cheek. His hand caught mine, and I felt my emotions flow into him. Love, want, pain, rejection, hurt, depression. I snatched my hand back, embarresed that he felt those. I grabbed the handle, opening the door and standing.

"Renesmee." His voice was low and filled with pain.

"Have a good day Jacob." I said, and closed the door.

Walking quickly through the parking lot and into the school building. I found my target. A tall, strawberry blond haired girl. Her glasses falling down her nose and clothes always a mess. Ally O'Hare. My best friend from school. She was a wild spirit, and I loved her. I caught up to her, and she took one look at my face and wrapped her arm's around me. Besides Jacob, who was the cause of most my problems, she always knew how to make me feel better.

"There there, don't ruin mascara over a guy. Jacob again?" I nodded.

"Iv told you hun, just kiss him and shock him, then when hes stund." She wagged her eye brows and I laughed. She pulled me towards our first class.

"Just show him what he's missing, once he sees you in bed he won't be able to leave you be." Ally was always inappropriate, making dirty jokes. She taught me so many things over the two years, some things id rather not know.

We took are seats and started class. School went bye, and we were seated at lunch, with a couple of Ally's other freinds. I wasn't close with anybody but her, but I knew everybody's name. People were naturally gravitated towards me, I was freindly, and the guy's were usually attracted to me.

"Incoming." Ally whisperd, and I looked up to see Brad. A tall blonde pretty faced boy making his way to are table. I so wasn't in the mood for this. He took the chair on my other side, placing himself to close to me.

"Good afternoon Ness, I heard a little bird say it's your birthday..would u like to have dinner with me? A birthday treat for you?" I sighed, but tryd to smile.

"No thank you, I have plans." I said. Ally always says im to nice to him, but it's how I was raised.

"Oh, come on hunny. Just ditch them." He smiled, and im sure it was suppose to be alluring but it wasn't.

"She said no, know leave."Ally said, giving him a dirty look. I gave her a thankful look as he left.

After lunch was art, my favorite class. I had fallen in love with art, mostly painting and drawing but all forms. It always helped me relax, to reel myself together and process. At the end of the day it was dad's car, not Jacob's that was waiting for me. I got in, and smiled.

"Hey Daddy, what's up?" He smiled, he loved when I called him that.

"Of course I do. And I just wanted to pick up my girl." I rolled my eyes, ya suree. I thought. Just say it. "Renesmee hunny, we know you've been having a hard time, and your mother and I have been trying to keep out of it. Your a grown woman know and you can make your own decisions. But...between me and you. I think your right. He's going about this the wrong way, and you need to make him see it. Just be mature about it." I was stunned and alittle embarrassed but was glad my parents understood me so well.

"That being said, the family has been talking about taking an extended hunting trip. Were going up into alaska and were going to see your cousins."

When?

"Where leaving tomorrow, and we'll be gone for about a week. Your mother and I are trusting you to be an adult, it will only be you and Jacob."

I snorted, ya, like I could even get him in the same room as me after this morning. A week out of school and a week of nobody in the house. Pointless, its never going to matter.

"I know you don't wanna hear this hunny, but be patient. This is hard for Jacob. " He finished as we pulled up the drive way. I know daddy.

"Esme says dinner is at 6." Dad said

"Alright grandma" I called, and made my way to my room, pulling off my school uniform and throwing it in my basket, pulling on some leggings and an old sweater that use to be dad's. I pulled my hair up, and peaked out my window towards Jake. He was in his room, sitting at his computer desk staring at the labtop. He musted of sensed my eyes on him, cause he glanced up, right into my window and caught me. I just smiled slightly and walked away, over to my second easel and starting my new project. It had been festering for a couple day's, the image. My 6th birthday, my party. The happiest one so far. I was lost, in the colors. A knock pulled me from my concentration, but I didn't move, trying to get his eyes perfect.

"Come in." I called, it was probably dad, getting me for dinner.

The door opened and his scent creeped into the room. Warm and musky. I turned, and Jake stood there, watching my scene. He walked over, and without seeming to think rested his hand on my hip, pulling me towards him.

"I remember that day." he said, I rested my head on his chest, taking comfort in his presence.

"That was my favorite birthday." I was content here. Just near him. My heart responded to him and the blood pumped faster in my body, sending my pulse haywire. He sighed, put his other arm around me, holding me closer.

"Esme says dinner's ready." He said quitly. I nodded.

"Jacob, im sorry about this morning." He was shaking his head before I even finished.

"Don't be sorry Ness, your right. I am doing this, its my fault."

I pulled away, grabbing his hand. "Come on lets eat."

We made are way downstairs, into the dinning room and grandma had a feast for two. All my favriote things. Mac and cheese, mash potatos, fried chicken. My family was spread around the table, with a seat open between mom and dad and one across from me. I sat down, with Jacob apposite from me.

"What's all this grandma?" I asked, and started making my plate. Jacob had heap fulls on his.

"I figured since we weren't going to be here for a week I'd make your favorites, beside's its still your birthday." She smiled at me and I couldn't help but smile back.

"Thank you very much." I said, to be polite. And started eating.

"So Renesmee, how was school." Dad asked.

"It was pretty normal, nothing special. I have an exam in history after break and im working on a art project. " I tried to think of anything else to tell them. Hm, Ally's inappropriate comments? Nope. Ugh, brad at lunch? Nope.

"What happend at lunch?" dad asked. Dam.

"Just the usual." I said, hoping he would drop it.

"Then why were you so anoyyed by Brad?" Everyone's eyes fell on me, including Jake's and his hand froze midair.

"Oh...um. It's just this guy that asked me out...again." I mumbled.

"Again? How many times has this happend Renesmee?" My mom said, worry in her tone.

"Uh...oh just once or twice...A week." I said, a blush creepying into my face.

"And what about other...boys.?" Dad said. Just let it go, please.

"Well...ya, there's been a couple." I tried to remember how many, 3? 6? No, 8.

" 8? " dad said, and I cringed, no dam privacy.

"Y-yes..so what" I said, I was getting annoyed by the conversation. I glanced a peek at Jake. His fork was on the table and he staring down. Concentrating hard on something.

"And what do you say to these...admirer's?" Dad asked. Ugh!

"I politely decline there invitation. Why does it matter!?" Dad looked like he was coming up with something. I didn't wanna have this conversation with Jake in the room.

"Well is because you've never been on a date or is it because you don't like them in a romantic way? "He asked. I looked at mom, but her face gave nothing away. I glanced at Jake again, and his head was still down, but I could see his eyes peering up at me.

"Umm..The second I guess." It sounded like a question.

"So, say someone from school asked you on a date, and you did like them. Would you say yes?" I was quite for a minute. It was a good question, of course Jacob was there, and supposedly I was suppose to be with him, I did want to be with him. But I couldn't, cause for some twisted reason he's convinced himself im not ready, or he's not. I didn't even know anymore. So would it be wrong of me, to go on a date. When he so clearly didnt? If he wanted to be with me, he wouldn't let something get in the way..so maybe he didn't want to..maybe he's just prolonging the inevitable so he didn't have hurt me. But he was. Everyday..I glanced at him again, but looked at dad.

"If...if someone I cared about, and I was interested in asked me out, then yes. I would go." I didn't see the point of this, so I started back down on my food, hoping it would end. It was quiet while I ate, after a couple minutes I relized Jake wasn't eating. He was sitting stiffly, staring at his plate.

Dad, is he okay? I thought, glancing at my dad but he just smirked a tiny bit and shook his head. So he was diong this on purpose? I was startled when Jake stood up, walking quickly to the door and sprinted down the yard. I watched in the window as he exploded from human to wolf, and felt the silent breeze up my spin that told me my wolf was hurting.

"Can I be excused?" I said, hanging my head.

" Ya baby." Mom said, and I stood getting ready to hide in my room.

"Thank you grandma, it was delicious " I told her, and walked to my room, settling my self into bed, laying there. It was clear that Jacob was upset, but I wasn't sure why. Did he feel betrayed, that I would go on a date? I didn't want to go out with anybody but him! Couldn't he see that already? I was so fustrated, and confused. A tear ran down my face, and I left it. Closing my eyes and praying no dreams came.

I wasn't that lucky, I dreamed that night, so vividly. I was running through the woods, following a familiar scent. I laughed, happy. I could tell I was getting closer, and as I broke throught the tree's to a clearing, I looked around, for my wolf, but he wasn't there.

"Jaacoob." I called sweetly.

"Yes?" A husky deep voice said from behind, as a warm pair of stong arms wrapped around my waist. I twisted, and using my momentum pushed back. We landed in a heap on the forest floor, me laying over him, across his chest. His loud deep laugh bellowed out, filling the tree's, and I laughed with him. His arms encased me again, holding me to his broad, naked chest. He was just in his shorts, and my eyes raked over what I could see, when they returned to his there was something I'd never seen in them, an intense hunger. I was shocked, and he so effortlessly leaned up, his lips a mear inch from mine.

My eyes flew open, and my heart raced, pounding throught my veins. I sat up, pushing the blankets of me, it was boiling in here. I pulled the sweater over my head, leaving my tank top and grabbing my stuffed wolf. I walked over to the window seat, leaning my head against the glass and finding Jacob in his room, asleep on his bed, his face toward me. It was still dark, but I could see the sun starting to peak over the landscape. I had to do something, this middle ground wasn't working. I couldn't, and wouldn't live my life like this. A soft knock came from my door, and I knew that scent.

"Come in Mama" I called quietly. She peeked throught a crack, smiling gently. I always loved her smiles, they were so gentle and loving.

"What are you diong up baby?" she said, coming in and sitting on the bench, facing me.

"Couldn't stay a sleep. Dreams." I sighed.

"Bad ones?" she asked. I shook my head. "That use to happen to me, I would always dream about thing's that felt impossible." She sounded whistful, like recalling a foggy memory. I glanced back down at the Jake's window, he was sound asleep.

"I don't know what to do mama." My throat tightened, and my eyes started to swim with moisture. She moved forward, holding me to her. My emotions came spilling out, along with my tears. My heart ached for my Jacob, like he was soo far away. She stroked my hair, letting me be overcome.

"Shh, now listen hunny. Im ganna tell you something important...men are human, and they make mistake's. There stupid sometimes, and its are job to make sure they know it. So here's what your ganna do baby. Take some time, go out with Ally. Make sure what your doing is mature, or it will only prove him right. Then tell him he's wrong and stop being stupid. If you wanna go out hunny, ask him. There's no rule that says you can't make the move." She finished and I couldnt help but feel alittle better. I nodded, paced my breathes, pulling myself together. She wiped my tears away.

"Make sure he sees that your ready for an adult reltionship. I know some part of him knows it, I know that man and he would never be attracted to you if you weren't ready. He needs to trust the imprint, its the human in him getting in the way." She kissed my forhead, and stood up.

"Were heading out know, everybody wanted to say bye but I told them you needed your space. We love you, and be safe. " She disappeared from the room, and I looked back out the window. I was startled to see his bed empty, hadn't he been there 5 minutes ago? I scanned the windows I could see, and the yard around his place. Just in the line of woods I could see him, standing with dad, having a conversation. I knew I was to awake to sleep, so I went to my easel, working on my painting some.


	17. Chapter 17: Finally

A/N: This is it, the moment you've all been waiting for. Enjoy!

* * *

When morning came I grabbed my phone, texting Ally, and went to shower. Pluging my ipod into the dock I set some music, and went about. The hot water felt so nice, I took a while. One perk about being me, my body didn't produce normal hair, which meant never having to shave my legs.

I got out, wrapped a large white fluffy towel around myself, and humming to the music opened the door between my ensuite bathroom and bedroom, and strolling out. I was laughing to myself, over my silly dance when a gasp stopped me short.

I spun, whirling and clutched my towel. Jake was sitting on my bed, wearing a black t shirt and jeans. I put my hand to my racing heart.

"Jacob, you scared me. " I said, trying to keep calm. So he was in my room with me in a towel. Who cares. Be grown up, don't freak out. I strolled to my dresser, pulling open the drawers and grabbing a black bra and panty set.

"What's up Jake?" I asked, turning around and placing them on the bed near him. I stiffled a gigle at his expression, and walked to my closet.

"Jacob?" I asked, waiting for him to awnser me.

"W-what? Oh! Umm...I was just wondering what you were diong today?"

I grabbed some light skinny jeans and a black tshirt, walking back to the bed and placed them near the undergarments. I grabbed my phone, clicking on my message from Ally.

"Looks like im going out with Ally for a while. Why? " I put it down, and grabbed my clothes, walking to the bathroom and pushing the door till it was cracked.

"Why?" I called again, Laughing to myself. Well I guess I got his attention.

"Uhh..just wondering. Will you be home for dinner?" He asked. I pulled my shirt over my head, and grabbed my brush, opening the door and sitting next to him on my bed.

"Ya, I will. What would you like? Grandma taught me a couple thing's." I started brushing out my tangles, stopping when his hand coverd mine and took the brush, much more gentle then I was. I closed my eyes, and savoured his presence.

"I was thinking I could make something?" He asked, and continued to brush through my curls.

"S-sure." My voice cracked and a blush spread its way onto my face.

I was having a hard time concentrating with him so close, he was so warm. He laughed alittle, put the brush down and wrapped one arm around my waist, pulling me to lean into him. My back against his chest, I breathed in his scent and relaxed. I put my hand on the arm against my stomach. Letting him feel how I was feeling. His touch calming me, and enjoying being in his arm, safe, cared for. His chin rested on my shoulder and his arm tightened around me.

" I know hunny, me to." He whispered.

"What were you doing this morning...I woke up and I could see you on the window seat, with Bella.." I hesitated, not sure what to tell him.

" I..I woke up after having a dream and I...was hot, so I sat near the window and mom came to check on me.." I hoped that would suffice.

"A dream? A bad dream?" He asked.

"No..Not a bad dream.." I blushed.

"You were crying...that's why I woke up. Somehow I knew you were in pain" He said.

" Y-yes..I was upset, but mom helped me."

"Why were you upset?" I sighed.

"I..I don't know if I should tell you.." I whispered. He buried his face in my shoulder, my hair tangling around him.

"Please tell me." His voice was rough, pleading.

"I dreamed about us, we were running, playing in the woods. There was this clearing, and you were ganna k-...well, I woke up before...and I just..wanted to see you, so I sat near the window. I was thinking when mom came in to talk."

My face was red, I couldn't belive I almost told him that I dreamt of him kissing me. But hadn't mom told me to be mature, to show him I was an adult? Surely that meant I could tell him I wanted him to kiss me, if I was honest I wanted more then a kiss. His breath was heavy and hot against my neck, he was quiet, and it worried me.

"Does that upset you? That I dream of you kissing me?" I asked, swallowing my embarrassment. He shook his head and I was relieved.

"What were you upset about tho?" He whispered, his breath rushed over me and a shiver ran up my spin.

"I was upset because it was a dream...because I want to kiss you Jacob, and go out on a date, I want to..to feel your arms around me and...and.." I couldn't continue, because I couldn't have those things, and it hurt to think about..I breathed, trying to calm myself. I didn't want to get emotional, but it was hard.

"What did Bella say?" He whisperd. I couldn't help but laugh.

"You'll love this. She told me to be patient with you. That men are stupid and it's are job to tell them there wrong... She told me to tell you your wrong and your being stupid..." I wasn't sure if I should tell him everything, but really it couldn't hurt.

"Jake...She said to trust the imprint, its telling you what you need, what I need and your fighting it. Your letting the human get in the way. You wouldn't feel what you do if I didn't feel the same way, you know what's next Jacob. You know its time for us..I want it. I want you." My voice was just a whisper by the end, but I knew he heard every word. I was quiet, waiting. He lifted his head just slightly, his breath fanning over my ear.

"That's about what Edward said to me this morning, except he wasn't so nice." He whispered. I couldn't take it anymore, I raised myself on my knees, turning to face him. He was startled for a second, but his hands rested on my waist, lightly. I placed my palms on his cheeks, opening my connection.

"Jacob." It was just a whisper. I started with my need to be close to him, the pull I always felt, my feelings, the butterflies, the pounding heart, his touch sending shivers down my body, the happyness he brings, then moved to how my body new he was there, how I wanted to be in his arms, feel him next to me, his touch, his face, his body. I didn't put any image's, just the emotions into him.

"Ness." My name from his lips was a groan, and it sent my body into shivers. He leaned down, his eyes boring into mine. The depths of his dark eyes held me to him. They flickered, from my eyes, to my lips, and back up. I couldn't move, waiting. His large hand cupped my face, and he leaned closer, his lips an inch away from mine. My eyes slid shut, and the loud obnoxious sound of my cell phone blared into the quite room, making me jump and Jacob looked towards the phone on the bed. He picked it up, handing me my phone and kissed my cheek.

"Ill see you for dinner." He said, and got up and left. I sighed, and picked up.

"You have, the worst timing on the planet." I told her.

We agreed I would pick her up, and head to the mall. The minute I showed up in my Tesla she wanted to know everything. So I told her, editing out the the supernatural and she was soo mad at her self for interrupting. We spent the morning shopping and talking, mostly about me and Jake. She was a little to excited that I had a week alone with him. We were walking into Victoria's Secret when my phone buzzed.

 **LET ME KNOW WHEN YOUR ON YOUR WAY.-JACOB.**

I smiled. "What are you giggling at? Ohhh, is it Jake?" she laughed.

"Your terrible, really. Yes, he's making me dinner."

 **HEADING TO VS, SHOULD BE ABOUT ANOTHER HOUR.-NESS.**

I hit send then made my way towards the racks. I had about three selections when it buzzed again.

 **THANKS FOR THAT IMAGE, NOT LIKE IM TRYING TO CONCENTRATE OR ANYTHING.-JACOB.**

I laughed out loud at that one, blushing and handing Ally my phone so she could read the message.

"Ohhhhh, he's flirting! Ness this is awesome!" She said, handing it back to me.

"I know, I think he's coming around." I said, smiling.

"Good! Now flirt back! " she said, I thought a moment and texted him back.

 **WELL IF THAT'S THE CASE MAYBE I SHOULDN'T TELL YOU WHAT IM BUYING. ON A DIFFRENT NOTE. WHITE, BLACK, BLUE, OR GREEN?-NESS**

I hit send and almost felt giddy. This wasn't usually the type of thing Jake allowed. I was really hoping I got to him this morning. My phone buzzed and I had the text open before it ended.

 **GREEN. ALWAYS GREEN, AND WHITE.-JACOB.**

I picked the green and white bra and panty set I had in my pile and moved over to the pjs.

 **GOOD TO KNOW-NESS**.

I picked up a pair of silk pajamas, a shorts and cami top combo in a pale pink and a white. They had a white silk robe that went with the pajamas perfectly. I made my way to the registers, with Ally behind me, her arms full. Checking out my phone buzzed, and I glanced at it.

 **ALRIGHT WOMAN, YOU'V TORTURED ME ENOUGH.-JACOB.**

We grabbed are bags, and left, making my way to the garage. I put my bags in the trunk, and slid in the driver's seat, opening my phone and answering him.

 **BE HOME IN 40.-NESS**.

I dropped Ally off, and she waged her eyes at me, winking.

"Text me with the details."

I laughed and left. Speeding towards home. I was excited to spend time with Jake, but nervous. What if this was just a fluke? What if he still says were not ready? Could I handle that? I tried to relax. It was just dinner with Jake. Nothing special. I pulled into the circle driveway, and shut off the the car. Jake was making his way down the steps, and popped the trunk. I walked around the back, and was met with his smile.

"Im proud of you, you only have like five bags " I laughed "and no shoes." I said, I always had a weakness for shoes. He grabbed my bags, in one hand and bounded up the stairs, opening the door for me. The house was filled with the smell of tomatoes and oregano.

"Mmm, what are you making?" I smiled sweetly at him, he laughed.

"Oh no, you go put away your thing's and ill finish dinner."

He handed my bags to me, and turned me around, facing me to the stairs. I made my way to my room, putting the bags down for later and heading over to my closet, I pulled of my tshirt, and put on a white silk tanktop. I pulled my hair up into a bun, pulled of my tennis shoes and socks and went barefoot. Looking in the mirror I was satisfied. Cute but casual. I made my way downstairs and towards the kitchen, finding Jake leaning over the stove.

"Do you need any help?" I asked. He peered over his shoulder, smiling hugely.

"Nope. Tables set, you can sit your pretty little butt down over there and wait." I laughed but listened, sitting in the chair and watching him.

"So it's pretty is it?" I asked, suppressing my giggles. He laughed, and turned, a plate in each hand and walked over, setting one infront of me and one in the seat by me. He leaned down and kissed my forehead.

"Yes it is. Now, what do you want to drink?" He walked over to the fridge, leaning in and grabbing a coke.

"Ill take one of those." He grabbed another and made his way back. He looked so cute, and confident. Like he didn't have a care in the world. Cracking the can and putting it infront of me, he sat down.

"Dad swears this is a Black family secret recipe, But its just spaghetti." He laughed and I looked down, noticing my food for the first time. It looked pretty good and I was hungry.

"Jake this look's amazing. Thank you. I didn't know you could cook."

"Not much, but the basics." He sounded embarrassed, and I leaned over, kissing his hot cheek.

"Thank you." I said sincerly. I forked some spaghetti and took a bite full. We ate in relative silence, enjoying my food. It was relaxed, a calm atmosphere. He seemed happier, more serene then he had in a long time. As I finished my plate, he was already done.

"So, how was your day?" He asked.

"It was good, I picked up Ally and we went to the mall. You know her, alot of inappropriate comments and shopping and here we are." I laughed. Jake met Ally on several occassions, and he knew what I meant. He laughed and nodded.

"What did you do today?" I asked. I was curious about how he spent his day after this morning. He leaned back, rubbing his flat muscled stomach.

"Well, I did some school work this morning...cleaned my place some." He grabbed my hand. "And did a whole lot of thinking..." I was instantly nervous..I felt my body freeze.

"Come on hunny." Jacob pulled me up, walking over to the living room and sitting on the couch. I sat near him, but turned and faced him. I could see he was thinking hard, he stood up and started pacing. He was nervous too, I relized.

"Jacob, just say it." I wanted to know what he was thinking, the Suspense was painful. He stopped and looked at me, taking me in.

"Ness..your right."...What?

"What?" I said, stunned. He sat down, holding both my hands.

"Your right hunny. I do know what you need, what I need. Iv known it for a while, and I was fighting it. I wasn't prepared for it before, I didn't know how to make that transition. And now im just terrified of messing it up. Nessie baby, you are the most important thing to me. I can't afford to make mistakes with you. But I can see im making one know, pushing you back like this. It's not working and it's only going to cause more damage. I know how grown up you are, and if you say your ready, then ill trust you." It didn't escape me that he called me baby. He'd never done that before. I sat for a moment, processing.

"Sooo, your saying?"I asked, I wasn't really sure what he was saying.

"Im saying..That if your sure your ready for this, then I can't deny it any more. I want to be with you Nessie." A smile stretched across my face and I launched myself at him, wrapping my arms around his neck and pressing my face into his hot skin. He chuckled, holding me tightly to him, his hands firm around my waist. He leaned back, pulling me with him. I pressed my palms to the back of his neck, opening my mind to him.

 _really? Jacob. You mean it?_ I felt his mouth curve up in a smile.

"Ya baby, I mean it. You don't know how hard its been to stay away from you." His lips pressed on my shoulder, and my heart raced. I stayed in his arms, happy and content.

"Come on, lets get you to bed." He said, slipping an arm under my knees and standing with me in his arms. He walked up the stairs effortlessly, into my room and placed me on my bed. I didn't want him to go, afraid if he left he would change his mind.

"Jacob?" He sat next to me, slipping an arm around my back.

"Ya?" I hesitated, not sure how he would respond.

"Will..will you stay with me?" I asked, looking down.

"Im not sure if tha-" " Ill be good, I promise. I just don't want you to go.." I waited. His hand came up, pulling my face towards his and his eyes held mine, searching

" ..Sure, just let me go change.." he said, getting up.

"Okay." He smiled and walked out. I headed to my closet, deciding to not push him and picking out some long pj pants and a tshirt, I changed, tossing my pants and bra in the laundry and hung up my top. It wasn't really dirty. There was a knock on my door, and I practically ran to it, pulling it open. He had long pants on, like me. A tank top coverd his chest but left his arm's bare.

"You look beautiful.." he said, smiling and stepping in, closing the door behind him. I laughed.

"Im in pjs." I said, taking his hand and pulling him to my bed.

"I know." I Rolled my eyes

I pulled my white cover's down, thankful I had a queen size bed, flipping the light off and crawled in. I turned, facing him. He was standing near the open side, his arms stiff at his side, he looked conflicted.

"Really Jake, ill behave. I won't even touch you..." I sighed.

"You don't have to..if you don't want to.." I looked down, feeling rejected, my cheeks flamed. I felt the bed sag slightly and he was by my side, settling himself in, leaning back and pulling the blanket over us. His arm wrapped around me, pulling me against his side.

"Its not you im worried about hunny, and believe me, I want to be here more then I should." I turned slightly, laying on my side pressed againts him, my head on his muscled chest. I looked up towards his face, it was dark but I could still see him.

"What do you mean?"

"Not tonight, we'll talk more tomorrow. Alright?" he asked. I nodded, happy to just be in his arms.

"You know, I never did ask you what you got?" He said, nodding to the bags in the corner of my room.

"Not to much. I got a new shirt, some leggings, two bra sets and some new pjs." I said.

"How come you didn't wear your new ones?" he asked, picking at my shirt sleeve. I laughed.

"Because I promised to behave." His hand ran slowly up and down my back.

"Oh..." his face was priceless, shocked and intrigued. I couldn't help but laugh.

"There not that bad, I promise. Although you made a good choice in colors on the other ones." I smiled teasingly, winking at him. His eyes flickered back to the bags, curiosity lightning his eyes.

"Green?" He asked.

"And white." I said. His eyes fell on me, and they were intense.

"I love you in green." He whisperd, his voice husky. I blushed.

" I thought so.." I whisperd back. My heart beat faster, and I shiverd.

"Are you cold?" He asked, pulling me closer to him and wrapping both arms around me. I tried to ignore his body against mine, hot even through are layers. His side pressed to my front, I layed my arm across him, my hand falling on his chest. I could feel his strong heartbeat under my hand.

"No, im not cold." I whisperd. I yawned, and buried my face in his shirt. Inhaling his woody's scent. My body relaxed and I started drifting.

"Goodnight my love." The words whispered into my head, but I wasn't sure if they were real.


	18. Chapter 18: Boyfriend

A/N: What does everybody think about the last chapter? So I didn't really realize that everything was leading up to this till know, most of the story so far has been like a catch up to this point. But let me tell you this story is far from over, its just really starting. I hope you all enjoy what's here so far and leave reviews on your thoughts. To all who have reviewed already, your my favorite people! You make me wanna write more!

* * *

The bright morning light was shining into my room when I woke. I was warm and comfortable, I was just debating closing my eyes and going back to bed when I relized I was backed against something firm and warm.

Jacob.

Last night came flooding back and I smiled so big, happyness overtaking me. I was on my side, facing my room and was pressed tightly to his chest. One arm was under my head, stretched out on the bed, his other was around me, his hand resting on my stomach. I snuggled in farther, wiggling myself closer to him. His hand jumped to my hip, holding me still.

"Don't do that." He groaned.

I laughed quitly, keeping myself close to him but stopped moving.

"S'not funny. " His voice was low and gravelly, and sexy as hell.

"Well goodmorning to you to." I said, smiling. Nothing could dampen my good mood.

"Morning" he grumbled.

"Someone's cranky in the mornings " I commented. His hand slid back up my waist and around my stomach, holding me tightly.

"M'not cranky." He said, and buried his head in my neck, hiding from the sun. I poked his arm.

"Time to get up Jacob, we both know your starving." I laughed.

"Five more minutes." He whined.

"Come on hunny, we both need shower's and ill make breakfest." I said.

"Mmm, is that an invitation?" I laughed.

"Don't tease me." I said. We both knew he wouldn't take that invitation now. He grumbled, and groaned. Falling onto his back and stretching. I rolled over, giggling at him. He smiled his Jacoby smile, winking at me.

"Goodmorning beautiful." He said, leaning forward and pressing a kiss to my forehead.

"How'd you sleep?" I asked. He grinned.

"Best night of my life, slept like a baby." I blushed.

"It looks like it's going to be beautiful outside, let's shower and have breakfest, and we can figure out what we wanna do." I said, looking out at the sun.

"Sure sure. You go ahead, I'll get up in a minute." He said, lifting his arms over his head. His shirt was dishevelled, lifting on his torso and peaking at his muscled stomach. His biceps flexed and my stomach clenched, he was so handsome. I got up before getting caught oogling, making my way around my room.

I grabbed my bags from yesterday, putting everything away. Passing my bed Jacob was still there, watching me. I opened the window, checking the temperature outside. In the 70s, perfect. I grabbed a pair of light denim shorts, and a white tanktop, walked over to my dressers and picked out a white laced semi push up bra and a matching white laced thong. It had taken me a while to get use to the type, but Ally sweared bye them. Needless to say I started diong my own laundry. I grabbed a pair of white ankle socks and skipped to my bed. I leaned forward, hovering inches above his face. His eyes were intent on mine.

"If your still here when I get out, your introuble." I whisperd, and turned, walking into my bathroom and pushing the door till it was cracked. I turned the water on, and stripped, tossing the clothes into my basket and stepping under the stream. I was replaying last night in my head, thinking about how this seemed to work out finally.

I washed and conditioned, basking in my own happyness. I turned the water off and dried myself, soaking the moisture from my hair and dressed. I glanced in the mirror, I looked cute.

I put my socks on and walked out to my room. My bed was messy but empty. I laughed to myself. I brushed my hair, pulling it up and twisting it into a bun. I slid my tennis shoes on and walked over to my jewelry box on my dresser, taking out the necklace Jacob gave me for my sixth birthday. The pendent hugged my chest and I stroked it.

I went down to the kitchen, pulling ingredients out of the fridge. Eggs, bacon, and potatoes. I went about, cutting the potatoes into chunks and frying them. My mind wondered, to last night. So were we, official? Was Jacob my..what? Boyfreind? It didn't seem like the term did him justice. He was so much more then that. Would we go out on dates? Would he kiss me? When? What about more then a kiss? How would we ever get privacy in this house? Large warm hands settled on my hips and I jumped.

"Holy shit Jacob!" My face flushed, afraid somehow he would know what I was thinking. His deep laugh echoed throught the empty room.

"I called your name, this one's not my fault!" He laughed again. His hands slid forward, wrapping around me and his face lowered towards mine, his mouth inches from my ear.

"What were you thinking about. That had you so..distracted?" He asked, and a shudder ran down my body.

"You." I said, simply. I turned down the burner's and turned in his arms, stretching up and putting my arms around his neck. His hair was still damp, and he smelled amazing.

"Mmm, what about me?" He asked. His face lowerd to mine and he pressed a kiss to my jaw.

"Well...I was wondering.." I said, alittle breathless. He smiled, and pressed another one to my cheek.

"Yes?" He said, moving to my forehead. I wasn't sure how to say it, so I pressed my palm to the back of his neck.

 _Are we like..officially together?_ He chuckled and pulled back. Smiling widely, he was beautiful.

"Well I guess that depends." I frowned.

 _On?_ I thought. He chuckled and lifted one hand to stroke my cheek.

"Renesmee Cullen. Will you be my girlfriend?" A smile broke across my face and I hugged him.

"Seems like an odd choice of words for us, but yes. I would love to." I said. He hugged me back, and set me gently on my feet.

"Now, that's settled. Im hungry." He said, smiling sweetly and reached around me, stealing a peace of bacon. I swatted at him.

"So sit your pretty little butt down and wait." I said, repeating his words from last night. He laughed and sat down at the island a few feet from me.

"What do you wanna do today?" He asked around the stolen bacon he was eating.

"Do you have anything you have to do?" I turned off the stove, grabbing two plates and making his, then mine. His plate was about three times mine. I put it infront of him, placing mine next to his and grabbed two cups, and the milk from the fridge.

"Nope, im all yours till tomorrow. Tomorrow I have a course online and a video call with the guys from the shop. I would love to go for a run later." He said, and started eating, scarfing down the hot food. I knew he didn't mean a normal run.

"Alright, so let's hang out here for a while, and for a late lunch ill pack us some food and we can go for a run and find a spot to picnic?" I asked, eating my food at a human rate. He nodded, chugging some milk and continuing onto his food. I just laughed, my caveman.

We finished are breakfast and he helped me clean up the kitchen, and do the dishes. I wasn't use to seeing this domestic side of him, I liked it. We made are way to the big plush L shaped couch and he sat in the corner , stretching his long legs out and throwing his arms over the back of the couch. I picked three moves, and put them on the table, decided witch one first. We always loved having movie marathons.

I put the dvd in and walked back to the kitchen, grabbing a soda for jake and a water for me. I sat on the couch, putting the drinks down and kicking my shoes off, pressed play and leaned back. The opening credits started and Jake leaned over, wrapping his arms around me and pulling me over. I laughed. He tucked me into his side, his arm over me and his hand on my waist. We started with teen wolf the 1985 version. Then to one of Jacob's favorites, the karate kid with Jackie chan. We finished with my favorite, the princess bride.

After I switched to the last movie I layed on the couch, placing my head in his lap and looked up toward his face. He was frowning.

"What?" I asked.

"Your hairs tied up" He said, pouting. I couldn't help but laugh at his expression, he looked like a little kid.

"Yes it is." I waited.

"Can you take it out?" He asked. I was confused, but I reached up, twisting the elastic around and pulling it out. My long thick hair unravelled and fell in a damp curly mass on him. His smile was instantaneous. His left hand ran throught my hair, from root to tip. I gave him a questioning look. He shrugged.

"I like your hair down." He said, confident as always. His right hand rested on my stomach, and I could feel his heat throught my tank top. I tried to concentrate on the movie, but his hand in my hair felt amazing and he was distracting. About halfway through the movie his stomach started rumbling. I glanced at him, laughing quietly. He just grinned back, shameless. I could feel his eyes on me, for most of the movie. Id made him watch it about a hundred times, so he was probably bored.

"Why are you staring?" I whisperd.

I glanced at him and was right. His eyes were locked to my face, some strong emotion I couldn't understand swimming in them.

"Your beautiful and im trying to figure out how I got so lucky." He whispered back. I could see in his face he was serious, he meant every word. I blushed and he raised his hand from my stomach, stroking my cheek.

"I love that." He said and I blushed deeper. He chuckled, returning his hand and his thumb moved in slow soft circles. We finished the movie in silence, and I sighed peacefully.

"Are you ready?" He said quietly. I nodded, sitting up and pulling my shoes on. I made my way into the kitchen, pulling out stuff for sandwiches, he followed me in.

"Im ganna go change and grab a bag." He said, kissing my cheek and bolting out the door. I made four sandwiches for Jake, and one for myself. Grabbed three cokes and some snacks from the cabinet. He came back, in just his cut off sweatpants. A black backpack over his shoulder.

"Hey, is this big enought?" he sat on the stool, placing it on the island.

"Yup, let me just pack this and we can go." I grabbed the bag from him, packing the food and drinks.

"Ready." I smiled. He took the bag, slinging it over his shoulder. We headed out the back door, walking across the lawn, into the forest. He stopped, handing me the bag. I turned my back to him and heard him take a couple steps back. A soft thud, his shorts. The invisible current rippled through the air, and I knew my wolf was there.

I turned, smiling at the giant wolf. His mouth opened and his tongue fell out. I laughed, grabbing his shorts and putting them in the bag. He layed down, and I climbed on his back. I was definitely faster then a normal human, but I wasn't fast enought to keep up with Jake running full speed. He sprinted throught the woods, dodging trees and rocks. We skidded to a stop at the gate, and I jumped down, punching in the code and pulling the gates open. We passed and I closed them, climbing back on Jake and taking off into the national forest.

He ran for almost an hour, no real destination. Just running, the wind flowing throught his coat and wiping my hair around. We slowed, breaking throught a small round clearing. Déjà vu hit me, it was just like my dream. I hoped down, pulling his sweats from the bag and placing them infront of him. I patted his head.

" Good boy." I said laughing. I turned and went to find a good spot in the field. I felt him change back, some part of me was always aware of my connection with Jacob. I put the bag down, and before I could sit was lifted into the air.

"Ahh! Jacob! Put me down." He flung me around and into his arms, againts his bare chest.

"Good boy?" He raised an eyebrow at me. I busted out laughing. He grinned wickedly, shifted and threw me over his shoulder.

"JACOB! If you drop me I swear to god I'll neuter you." His laugh echoed through the forest. He bent over, pulling something from the bag and shaking it out.

"Put me down" I tried to sound firm, but I knew it was lost on him.

"If you insist." He leaned down, dropping me to the ground. My hands braced my fall, but I felt soft thread under my palms. A blanket was placed on the grass. He grinned at me, sitting infront and started pulling out the food. He handed me my sandwich and I stuck my tongue out at him.

We ate are meal, listening to the surrounding forest. It was beautiful here. The light filterd from the trees around us, turning everything green. It was warm, and a cool breeze swirled around the little clearing. I finshed my sandwich and laid down, grabbing the baggie of grapes and tossing them into the air, catching them in my mouth. He joined me on the ground, laughing when I missed one. I stretched my arms over my head, soaking in the sun. I looked towards him, his russet skin looked amazing.

"Im so jealous. I can never tan." I turned on my side, propping my head up and laid my arm over his muscled stomach. I was white and pale compared to him. His arm wrapped around me, holding me to his side.

" I love your complexion. Especially when I do this." His other hand stroked my cheek, sliding into my hair and pulling me to him, he kissed my cheek and I blushed red.

"Ya ya. Tease the pale one." I murmured. He laughed, letting me go and taking just my hand. It was quite and calm, and I didn't wanna leave, I wanted to stay here in this moment forever.I started to wonder about tonight. Would he stay with me again? What about his comment last night, should I ask, he said he would explain today, didn't he?

He chuckled suddenly, turning his head to look at me. He raised are hands, and smirked. Fuck. I really had to stop diong that.

"Nice language, wonder were you learned that from." He said. Dammit. I blushed, and tryd to pull my hand back.

"No, don't do that. I wasn't teasing you. Ask me anything." He sounded genuine. I thought about it, and came back to his comment last night.

"Why did you say it wasn't me you were worried about?" He was quite, thinking.

"..Well hun, I don't think you realize how...attractive you are." I thought about that.

" I don't understand." Of course I knew that other men found me attractive. I'd seen the looks and whispers at school, and my Jacob had always told me I was beautiful, but could it be more then that? Could he be physically attracted to me the way I was to him?

"Ness baby, of course I think your beautiful. But it's more then that, im not like the boys at your school. I was raised to be a gentleman. If I was anything less Edward would kill me. That being said." He stroked my cheek and smiled.

"I am a man, who is crazy about a woman. A very attractive woman. So to answer your question, yes. I am very physically attracted to you." I smiled, stupidly happy.

"So will you stay with me tonight?" I asked. He turned towards me, holding himself up bye his elbow and letting go of my hand. His face turned serious.

"I think we need to talk about that." Uh oh.

" ..okay.." I wasn't sure what to think, did I do something wrong?

"Don't worry hunny, there's nothing wrong." He sighed, working himself up.

"Im ganna asume that you've had..The talk with Bella?" His face looked so serious. I couldn't help it, I busted out laughing. Minutes passed and I wiped the tears from my eyes, trying to control myself. His face was not amused.

"Is that what your getting at? Oh god." I breathed heavily, trying to pull myself together.

"You had me worried. Wow. Okay. Yes, Jacob. I know what sex is." He let out a breath. Relieved. " I do go to high school, and you should hear some of the thing's Ally says." I raised my hand, laying it on his neck. "Why?" I asked.

"I just wanted to make sure you understood..where together now, but I don't want to...rush things." I nodded, understanding.

"Like we could even get up to anything once they come home. It'll be torture." He laughed.

"Yes it will." It made me curious tho, Jacob had a whole life before me. He was technically 25. It would be naive of me to think he was innocent. His hand stroked my face.

"What? I can see the thoughts in your face." I persed my lips. Thinking of a way to ask him. I opened my palm, pressing it to his hot skin.

 _Well, I know your older. Did you ever..before me?_ I closed the connection, looking at his face. He shook his head slowly.

"No baby, nothing like that. I already told you what I thought I felt for Bella. That was it." I nodded and smiled. Happy that he would be mine in everyway some day. I leaned closer to him, stroking the hair on his neck.

"Now when you say rush thing's...?" He chuckled.

"I mean, go slowly. We have forever Nessie, I don't wanna mess thing's up by doing something were not ready for. Your too important."

His hand rested on my cheek, and his dark eyes held mine. My heart thudded loudly in my chest, and butterflies swam in my stomach. His skin was hot where it touched mine, and I leaned into him, wanting to feel him close. My eyes searched his face, settling on his soft lips. How many times had I dreamt of those lips? The anticipation was painful.

"Jacob."

I whisperd, tugging softly on his neck were my hand rested. He hesitated an inch away. I glanced up, into his eyes, and his lips finally met mine. Warm and soft and amazing. It was gentle, and lasted just a moment. He pulled back, and his smile was brighter then the whole universe, I knew mine had to match his. His thumb stroked my cheek, tenderly, and he kissed me again, holding my face to his.

"You don't know how long iv wanted to do that." He whisperd when he pulled back again, letting me breathe. Wrong, I thought. I knew how long iv wanted him to do that.

We packed up are picnic, tossing everything into the backpack, adding his shorts when he changed. We made are way back through the woods, stopping at the gate and punching in the code. I walked along side him back to the house, turning around and handing him his shorts.

"Im ganna go shower, I'll meet you inside." He said, and kissed my forehead. I headed inside, up stairs to my room, put my necklace back in it's spot and grabbed a set of my new pjs, the white silk ones, and headed into my bathroom.

The hot water felt amazing, washing the dirt from are trip. I got out and dried off, slipping on the shorts and cami, and brushing throught my hair. I looked in the mirror, noticing the smile plasterd to my face. He kissed me. My Jacob, had finally kissed me. I opened the door, flipping off the light and walking into my bedroom.

He was there, stretched out on my bed. Wearing pj pants, his arms behind his head and his chest bare. I leaned againts the wall, taking him in. He grinned at me, his eyes roaming my body.

"That's not fair." I said, nodding towards his chest. He laughed.

"Look who's talking. You look incredible. Come here."

He opened his arm's, and I grinned, climbing onto the bed and into them. I layed on my side, half pressed to his chest with my head cradled on his shoulder, he held me tightly, and I breathed in his unique scent, made stronger bye his shower.

"I had an amazing day my Jacob." I said quietly, snuggling myself closer, one of my legs tangled between his, my thigh resting on his own. His hand rubbed my back, soothingly.

"I did to sweetheart." He rested his head atop mine, and layed his other hand on my exposed leg, right above my knee. His hot palm distracted me, pulling my attention to his body under mine. I breathed, trying to distract myself. His hand lifted slighlty, his finger tips brushing my skin and started to slowly creep up my leg, lightly following some invisible line to the edge of my shorts, and back down, around my knee and back up.

I shifted, trying to ignore the way his touch lit up my body. I didn't have control tho, I felt my heart accelerate, sending my pulse hammering againts my chest. I squirmed again, pressing closer to him and pressed my face to his hot neck.

"Something the matter?" He asked, his voice teasing.

"N-no." My voice cracked, and I blushed. He chuckled, low and entertained. He knew what he was diong, knew he was teasing me. Well, two could play at that game.

I ran my hand down his chest, letting my fingers trail across every muscle in its path, and turned my head slightly, pressing my lips to his neck. He exhaled heavily and his hand froze. I continued, trailing my lips slowly up, and my hand trailed down, stroking over his abs softly. I felt the muscles tense, tightening under my palm. I pressed a firm kiss to the soft skin under his ear, and my hand slid over his navel, encountering that thin trail of hair that I knew disappeared from sight.

I didn't make it more then an inch before his hand firmly grasped mine, pulling it up to lay on his chest again.

"Something the matter?" I asked innocently.

"Point taken." His voice was gravelly and strained. I opened my palm, pressing it firmly to him.

 _Ill behave if you do._ I rested my head back on his shoulder, giggling to myself. I closed my eyes, relaxing my tense body and his hand held mine.

"Get some sleep sweetheart." He kissed my forehead, and I drifted off in his arms.


	19. Chapter 19: Dreams

A/N: I hope you guys are as excited about these two as I am!

* * *

The dream started just like before.

Bursting into the large sunny clearing, Jacob behind me. Laughing on the florest floor, tangled above him. When he leaned forward, his lips an inch away from mine. I waited. His hot breath blew across my face, and his lips pressed, so glorious and firm against my own. Hot, and soft. He kissed me carefully, controlled. But I wasn't having it. I'd been waiting to long. I pressed back, tangling my hands in his hair and sitting up, allowing my legs to fall on either side of his hips. He followed me, leaning forward till I sat in his lap and his hands slid down my sides, resting on my hips. My lips parted and I ran my tounge over his bottom lip, asking for permission. He didn't hesitate, opening his mouth and his tounge tangled with my own. His hands slid, slowly up my back, then down, my waist, hips, and down to my thighs. Squeezeing them gentle I couldn't help the moan that fell from my lips. He pulled back, breathing heavily.

"Ness." His voice said, restraining.

"Mmmm." Was all I could say.

"Nessie." It said again, Louder.

"Jacob."

"Renesmee..Wake up."

I frowned. No, I didn't want to..My eyes opened, blinking the dreams from my mind, I was faced with my Jacob. He was on his side facing me, his arms wrapped tightly around me, holding me to his chest. One hand was on his chest, and the other was pressing to his back, holding me to him.

"Mm, what..what time is it?" I said, groggy still. It didn't look light outside.I looked up, and his face looked almost pained. His eyes were dark, and his breath was heavy.

"Jacob, whats wrong? " I whisperd, panicking slightly, he looked hurt.

"N-nothing...I just need a minute." His arms were hard around me, frozen. His breath was still heavy, and his words were rought, husky. I didn't understand what was happening. I shook my head, trying to get the last image of my dreams from my head. My hand slid down his back, his skin hot and I froze. No. I didn't, did I?

"Yes, you did." His voice was alittle more controlled, but he was still breathing heavily.

I pulled my hands from him, pressing them to my chest and a flaming blush spread across my face. I buried my face in his chest, embarrassed. I couldn't belive I had sent my dreams to him. Of course I knew I could, mom and dad use to watch my dreams when I was a little girl. His hand rubbed soothing cirles on my back but his touch alone sent a shiver down my body. It was still on edge, from my dream. He stopped, and sighed. His fingers brushed the hair from my face, tucking under my chin and pulling gently. I knew I couldn't resist him. I lifted my face but didn't look at him, staring anywere else.

"Renesmee...look at me baby." His voice was soft but demanding. My eyes fell to his and the emotions swiming there held me.

"Im sorry " I whisperd. I didn't know what else to say. He shook his head slowly.

"No, you have absolutely nothing to be sorry for, or embarrassed. There's nothing wrong with what you were dreaming hunny. It just suprised me, I wasn't prepared for it." I nodded, but was still embarrassed. He sighed.

"Ness..Im sorry iv done this to us. I thought I was diong the right thing, keeping us apart. I didn't relize how it would feel to you...I don't want you to think that what you feel is..wrong, its not baby. I have those dreams to." He said. I smiled, feeling a little better.

"Really?" I stretched my arms up, over his neck, pressing myself to him.

"Yes really, mine are alittle...different. but I still have them." Grinning I lifted myseld up to his face

"Different how?" He chuckled, his hands on my back holding me to him.

"Well..let's just say there not usually that...innocent." he smirked, and I blushed.

"Well...lets just say mine aren't usually that...innocent." I said, smiling back at him. He moved forward, lightly pressing his warm lips to my own. My dream flashed in my head, but I controlled myself, I knew that wouldn't do me any good. It was still early so I rolled over, snuggling myself to him and closing my eyes. His arms around me held me firmly to him, but I noticed he kept his hips pulled away from me. Smiling to myself I fell back asleep.

Next time I woke up I was alone. I got out of bed, sleepy despite my long rest. I wondered down stairs, in search of my Jacob. As I made my way through his front door I heard his voice, coming from his room. I peaked my head in, and he was there infront of his labtop. In the screen was Jared, Embry, and Seth. I missed those guy's so much. Jacobs freinds had always been part of my family. They were talking numbers, and when he saw me he smiled, putting a hand up and reaching towards me. I walked in, hesitantly.

"I didn't mean to disturb." I said quietly.

"Your not, come here and say hi." He said normally, cutting of Embry's words. He grabbed my hand, pulling me into view and onto his lap. My face was pink when I looked towards the guys, smiling and I waved.

"Ness! Look at you!"

"Nice pjs!"

"Hey!"

They talked over eachother, pushing into the main view. I laughed, missing there ruckus behavior. Jacob's arm rested on my back, his hand on my waist, I leaned back into him.

"Hey, how is everybody?" I i said, placing my left hand on Jacob's leg. A loud chorus of good, and we miss you sounded and I laughed.

"You guys will have to come visit soon. I miss you all to."

"We will!"

"Definitely!"

"Alright, ill let you guys get back to work." I laughed, getting up and turning around towards Jake. I leaned down, putting my mouth towards his ear.

"Im ganna make us some breakfast, ill be in your kitchen." He smiled hugely, and I turned, taking a step away. His hand grasped mine, tugging me back and his face was expectant. I glanced at the screen and the guys were staring, watching us. I flipped my hair over my shoulder, creating a curtain and leaned down. It was the first time I initiated the kiss, and I pressed my lips to his. I was acutely aware of the errupt of outburst coming from the speaker.

"FINALLY!" and "GET A ROOM!"

I pulled back blushing and he winked. I left heading toward the kitchen. I laughed to myself, giddy from this strange high. Everything was falling into place, I had my Jacob, and we were together. I cooked eggs and bacon, listening to the sounds from his room. They guys were distracted after are public show, and he couldn't pull them back in. When I heard embry say "Its about time, Jake's finally getting some." I heard the sound of someone smacking him in the head throught the speaker and Jake said that was it, im leaving.

His footsteps were light across the hardwood floor and his big strong arms wrapped around me. He buried his face against my neck, his hot lips landing lightly on my skin. I shivered, trying to ignore my body's reaction to him. He chuckled, kissing my neck again.

"J-Jake. Im trying to concentrate.."

"Mhmm, don't let me stop you.." His breathe was hot on me.

I caved, shutting the burner off and turning. My arms wrapped tightly around his neck, and I stretched up on my toes, pressing my lips to his. He reached down, grasping me and lifted me onto the counter besides the oven. I was much closer to his height this way. His hands rested on my waist, and his kiss was still light and gentle, but my control was slipping just alittle.

He pulled back, smiling, but I wanted more. My palm pressed to his neck, opening my mind to his. _Kiss me Jacob_. His smile faded slightly, becoming background to the burning in his eyes. Desire and conflict were the main emotions on his face, not one taking over the other. I knew he battled with being a gentleman, but it didn't bother me. I smiled encouragingly, tugging gently on him. He didn't deny me, leaning in and pressing his lips to mine.

I internally sighed at his soft hesitant kiss, but I decided not to push him, and enjoyed what I got. He kissed me for a while, forgetting the world. It was when I heard a loud growling noise coming from him, that I laughed. Pulling back and looking at his stomach. He smiled, almost sheepishly and stepped back, allowing me space to jump down. I finished making are breakfast and sat down to eat.

"What are you going to do today?" He asked, around a mouthfull of bacon. I contemplated my options. Iv had a couple very wonderful days, and I think alittle me time should be in order.

"I think im ganna hangout here. Have a little relaxing time." He smiled, nodding his head.

"That sounds great. Its been kinda busy, huh?" He said. He finished his food, stealing my last peice of bacon.

"I have a good couple hours of schoolwork. This whole collage online thing is so much better then going to class everyday." He glanced at the clock, calculating.

"Its almost ten now, so I should be done around four?"

"Alright. Sounds good."

I got up, taking are dishes to the sink and started cleaning up, I heard him retreat to the bedroom, and I wondered around, tidying up his home. Once everything was cleaned up and the cats were fed and loved, I made my way to his room. He paused a video lecture, taking off his headphone.

"Im ganna head to my room and take a bath I think. ." His eyes narrowed slightly, I walked over to him, leaning down and kissing him, he grinned mid kiss, causeing me to laugh. I held his face, pulling back an inch.

"Stop smiling, im trying to kiss you." He laughed but fought his smile. He wrapped an arm around me, pulling me down onto his lap. I kissed him for a couple minutes, getting lost in his embrace.

"No no, you have school work." I pulled away, struggling to stand, his arms still pining me down. He grinned, leaning forward and kissing me again. I couldn't help it, I caved pressing my self as close as I could in the limited angle and kissing him back. He pulled back this time, frowning.

"Ill see you later." I said, giving him one more kiss and standing.

I went to the big house, making my way to the kitchen and getting my favorite treat, a Hershey chocolate bar, and a cold coke. Up in my room I turned on the tub, setting everything on the low table close bye and wondering to my bookshelves, scrolling throught the options. I selected a work of short storys, grabbing my phone and walking back to the tub. I turned off the tap, stripping and sliding into the hot water.

I relaxed, leaning back againts the headrest and took a bite of chocolate. It was so perfect I refilled the hot water twice, eating my chocolate and sipping at my coke. I read a couple of my favorite story's, eventually putting the book down and just closing my eyes.

A low buzz got my attention and I picked up my phone.

WHAT ARE YOU DOING? -JACOB. I rolled my eyes, the clock only said 1:36.

TAKING A BATH. YOU ARE SUPPOSE TO BE DOING SCHOOL WORK.-NESS.

I KNOW, BUT I CAN'T CONCENTRATE. -JACOB.

WHY IS THAT? - NESS

BECAUSE YOUR TAKING A BATH. -JACOB

I laughed, blushing to myself, he was a tease. I vaguely wondered what type of 'take thing's slow' timeline he was thinking. It took me two years for a kiss, that thought made me groan internally, I would be lucky if I got him to sleep with me within a year.

WHY DON'T YOU COME JOIN ME? -NESS

DON'T TEASE ME.-JACOB

IT WASN'T A TEASE. -NESS

I rolled my eyes, expecting his refusal. At least for know we had privacy, but what would happen when everybody came home? When dad came home? I groaned.

THAT DOESN'T HELP MY SELF CONTROL.- JACOB

WHY DO YOU NEED SELF CONTROL? - NESS

SO I DON'T GO UP THERE RIGHT KNOW AND HAVE MY WAY WITH YOU.-JACOB.

I turned beat red, my imagination running wild. I saw him walking into the bathroom, wearing just his normal cut of jeans. He leaned forward, kissing me deeply and his hand stroked my face, following my neck, dipping into the now cool water.

I TOLD YOU NOT TO TEASE ME. -JACOB

ON THE CONTRARY, I THINK I ENJOY TEASING YOU, MY IMAGINATION JUST GOT AWAY FROM ME. -NESS

ONE DAY BABY.- JACOB.

FINISH YOUR SCHOOL WORK, IM GETTING OUT NOW. -NESS.

I pulled the drain, getting out and drying off. In my room I opened my dresser, pulling out panties and decided against a bra. I pulled on some loose sweatpants, tieing the drawstring at my hips and picked out a tank top.

I turned on some music, low and sat on my window seat with my sketch pad. I went from memory, drawing out the little clearing from yesterday. The sun shining down, and Jacob, laying on the blanket his face turned to me. I drew the long length of his body, relaxed and somehow still calling to me. No matter how glorious his body was it was always the eyes that got me. His eyes were my favorite, they told a whole story. I floated on my little happy cloud, drawing out small details till I was done and wanted nothing more then to see him.

I tossed my book on the bed, pulling on some moccasins and heading down to Jacob. I went straight for his room, he was still on the computer, concentrating on the screen but he held his hand out for me, inviting. I walked over to him, kissed his cheek but went over to his bed, laying in the middle spread out.

"Give me five more minutes." He said, typing.

"Take your time." I closed my eyes, listening to his heartbeat. I streched, raising my arms above my head and fanning my hair above me. I waited for him to finish, kicking of my shoes. 3,2,1.

"There, all fini-" I heard his chair spin while he spoke, and looked at him when he stopped. He was standing near the desk, watching me.

"What?" I asked, self conscious. I was mostly appropriate, my tank top was alittle short, but my sweatpants coverd down to my toes. He still didn't respond.

"What! Why are you staring?" My hand fell to my top, pulling it down and making sure I wasn't exposed. He smirked alittle, shaking his head slowly. He walked forward, to the edge of the bed and wrapped his large hands around my ankles, yanking me down the bed. My top rod up farther, bunching just under my chest.

"You look incredible." He whisperd, leaning over me.

I was baffled, I didn't understand men at all. He kissed me, sweetly. I couldn't help but laugh.

"Your so weird." He shook his head, smiling again.

"This is you, right here. No fancy clothes or make up. Just my Ness." I wrapped my arms around his neck, lifting my head up and kissing him. I don't think I would ever tire of kissing him.

"Im always your Ness." I said confidently. He kissed me again, and the rest of are day went on just like his kisses, perfect.


	20. Chapter 20: Alone Time

A/N: How are all my wonderful Readers? I love seeing the followers and stats grow everyday. I hope your all enjoying this story, and as always read and review! Your reviews are the favorite part of my day, even if you have something to critique!

* * *

Are days togather passed slowly, spending almost all day with him. The couple hours he spent on school I found something to do, either painting or studying.

On tuesday I called Ally, telling her the news and she talked for a straight hour, not letting me get a single word in. Then questioned me for another two hours. She was beyond happy for me tho, and that's all that really matterd.

On wensday I was making breakfest, in the big house. Jake had gone to his room to shower and change. I was making his plate, wondering what was taking him so long, as I sat down I heard the back door open, and his footsteps approach. I turned, he was standing in the doorway, one hand behind his back. I was immediately suspicious.

"...What are you doing..?"

He smiled, slowly stepping forward. He kissed me once, and produced a small bundle of wild flowers from behind his back.

"What are those for?" I carefully took the flowers from him, a smile making its way onto my face.

"For you, as..incentive." he grinned.

"Incentive for what?" I eyed him, still a little suspicious but I melted over the flowers.

"Incentive to go on a date with me, tonight. I have to go into school and hand in some papers for class, and I have a video call with the garage but I think its time I take you on a proper date." He flashed me his best smile.

"Really?" My smile turned into a wide grin.

"Yes really, say around..5?" I nodded enthusiastically and he laughed, sitting down and starting on his breakfest. I grabbed a vase from the cabinet, filling it with water and putting my flowers inside. Then I joined him, taking a forkfull of eggs and dipping it into my ketchup.

"That's gross, I don't know how you can do that." He make a disgusted face. I laughed and scooped another bite into my mouth.

"Because it's delicious." I took another, and added a piece of bacon, chewing and swallowing.

"Eggs and ketchup do not mix." I grinned and took my last scoop of eggs, dipping it in my ketchup and turned towards him. I slowly brought the fork to my lips, keeping my eyes on his. I pulled it back, trapping the food in my mouth, my tounge darted out, licking a tiny drop of ketchup that had escaped from my lip. I saw him shift in his seat, his eyes on my mouth.

I smirked, and slid down from my stool, taking my plate to the sink and began washing my dishes. He was quiet behind me, and I started to feel a little bad, but I heard him get down and approach. His hand appeared to my right, placing his plate in the sink and his other hand rested on my back. He slid over alittle, settling himself behind me. His hands know rested on my hips, curling around and my heart took off, pumping painfully threw my body. His thumbs slipped under the hem of my tshirt, and my skin tingled were his touched. His grip was firm, holding me close against him. He leaned forward, pressing his lips to my neck. I sighed, and they trailed up, finding a tender spot near my ear.

A low breathy moan escaped my mouth and I snapped it close, a deep blush spreading across my body. His hands gripped me tigher, and his body froze behind mine. His hot breath fanned across my sensitive skin, and my body shudderd. Quick as a vampire he spun me, leaning forward till I was backed against the cabinet and his lips were on mine. His skin was hot under my lips and hands, they wrapped around his strong neck, sliding threw his silky hair. His kisses were still controlled but less gentle, pressing more firmly against mine. His hands were insistent, one running up and down my back, the other sliding into my hair, holding my face to his. I kissed him back, all sense of responsibility flying out the window and I molded myself to him, one hand falling to his lower back and pulling him as close as I could.

He slowly retreated, leaving an inch of space beween are body's and he rested his forehead against mine, his breath heavy and his eyes held mine. I smiled, alittle sheepishly and he laughed. He pressed a light kiss to my lips once and stepped back.

"Ill see you at five."

"Where are we going?" He smirked, and started backing up.

"Don't worry, just wear something nice but comfortable." He winked and disappeared.

I stood in the middle of the kitchen, calming my heart and pulse. When it was mostly back to normal I finished the dishes and then grabbed my flowers, going up to my room.

At three thirty I got in the shower, washing and conditioning. I got out and moisturized, then slipped on a robe. I carefully dried my hair into neat curls, running my fingers threw it and adding some volume. I walked over to my closet, sorting through some clothes. Nice but comfortable. What did that mean? Well we were going at five, which meant at some point we would be getting food. So something cute, but not to fancy.

I considered a dress but I wasn't sure what else we would be diong so I decided against that. I picked out my best pair of jeans, some designer brand from Aunt Alice that were dark wash and searched throught my tops. I found a light floral loose one, long sleeved but flared out. It was white with tan and light pink flowers. I picked out a pair of tan boots, with a three inch block heel. I placed them on my bed, and headed into the bathroom, over to my makeup vanity. I kept it minimal, darkening my lashes with mascara and putting on some lip gloss.

I checked the clock on my way out 4:40. I sorted through my dresser, picking out a white bra and pantie set. I slipped off my robe, pulling on my jeans and top. I grabbed some socks, and slid on my boots, zippering them up. I peaked in the mirror hanging on my closet door, satisfied with my look.

The light pale shirt and shoes went well with my skin tone, and my dark jeans contrasted. I secured my necklace, and rifled through my jackets, finding my dark tan leather one and pulling it on, I grabbed my purse and closed the closet door, and just a moment later a knock sounded. My pulse went haywire, sending my heartbeat fluttering faster then normal.

I pulled open the door, reveling my Jacob. He was beyond handsome, wearing his own dark jeans, and a deep blue v neck shirt. He had on a black leather jacket and black boots. My eyes traveled the length of him, taking in his strong structure and up to his face. He had a wide grin on his lips, his teeth bright white and his eyes were on me.

A strong feeling of love and passion overwhelmed me, rooting me to the spot. How did people deal with this all the time? I never wanted to leave his side. He laughed softly, and I somehow knew he felt it to, he understood perfectly. He stepped forward, placing his large hands on my cheeks tenderly and leaned forward. His lips touched mine, molding together. I felt my pulse react to him, jumping around. He pulled back a couple inches, not letting me go.

"You look, so gorgeous." A blush spread across my cheeks.

"Thank you, you look so handsome." I smiled at him, leaning up and catching his lips to mine. He allowed my kisses for a couple moments, but laughed and pulled back.

"Are you ready?"

"Are you going to tell me where were going?" He smiled and took my hand, towing me from my room and throught the house.

We were in the car, following the roads into town. He had a smile plasterd on his face, and his lips stayed close.

"Jacob, what are we doing?" He ignored me. "Jake?" Silence. I scooted closer to his side, leaning over the console and laying my hand on his leg. I saw his eyes flash over to mine, and I stuck out my lower lip, pouting. We paused at a red light and he turned his head, kissing my lower lip. His hand grabbed mine, moving them over to rest in my lap. I held his hand with both of mine, complacent as he turned back to the road and continued driving.

We pulled up to a grill and steakhouse a couple minutes later. The smell wafting around outside had my stomach growling, it smelled amazing.

"Is this okay? I didn't think you would want something to fancy."

"This is perfect." I smiled.

He opened his door, getting out and quickly walking around to my side, opening my door for me. We walked up to the entrance, and he held the door open for me. I laughed alittle, walking to the podium.

There was a tall man standing behind it, maybe in his mid twenties, wearing a black dress pants and dress shirt combo. He smiled at me, looking me up and down appreciatively. Jake stepped up next to me, winding his arm around me alittle territorially.

"Reservation for black." He said smoothly, pulling me closer to him. The guys eyes immediately came off me, and looked down, avoiding Jake's gaze.

"Right this way sir." He showed us throught a crowded restaurant, over to a quieter corner with less booths and less people.

"You're waiter will be here shortly." He placed two menus down and quickly left. I sighed and rolled my eyes at Jake.

"What?" He asked, too innocently.

"You're such a boy." He schoffed, pointing to himself.

"Im a man, thank you very much."

I ignored his comments, and looked down at my menu. We ordered and talked, mostly about unimportant thing's, and about his school. He was really enjoying his business classes, and it turned out he had a knack for it. They had already started making some changes at the garage back home. We talked alittle about going down there this summer, and staying for a couple weeks. I thought it was a great idea, but I wasn't sure how mom and dad would take it. Which reminded me that I had yet to tell them about Jake and I. They called a couple times to check up on us, but I was waiting till they got home.

He paid, without letting me see the bill, and we left, making are way down the street rather then to the car. The restaurant was in one of the most popular parts of town. It wasn't very busy, considering it was a wensday night in September, but the shops were lined with Halloween decorations and the bright orange and yellow leaves scattered the ground. We sat on a bench near a small park, enjoying the serenity of it all. Around seven we headed back to the car, making are way home. I changed in the bathroom, while he pulled on his pjs pants he had left here. We laid down and he pulled me into his arms, holding me tight as I fell asleep.

I woke to the sound of Jake's voice. It was dark in my room, no light shining from outside. I tried to clear my head, trying to concentrate on what he was saying.

"Ness, wake up hunny."

"Mm, Jake? What time is it?" I mumbled. I was still in his arms, my head on his chest.

"Its only two baby." I shifted, trying to sit up.

"Why.." I started, but I was groggy. Confused on why he would wake me so dam early. I became aware of an ache in my lower back, trying to strech it.

" I didn't want to wake you sweetheart but you should go use the bathroom." He said quietly, stroking my cheek.

"I dont understand." I was getting alittle erritated, being so tired and uncomfortable.

"Just trust me baby. Go." I groaned. Getting up gingerly, my body was stiff, and I rubbed my back. I headed into the bathroom, confused but the sooner I listened the sooner I could sleep.

It didn't take me long to realize why I was so achy, and I groaned. Great. Perfect timing mother nature. I pulled my hair up, stripping and jumped in the shower. I washed quickly, getting out and taking care of it. I wrapped a towel around myself, getting ready to walk out. A soft knock on the door sounded.

"Ness baby, I got you some new pjs. You okay?" I tried to fight the blush back as I opened the door, taking the pile.

"Im fine, thank you. Can u check the sheets?"

"I already did, there fine."

I closed the door, unravelling the clothes. A pair of soft cotton sleep pants, a matching long sleeved shirt, and cotton boyshort panties. I blushed again, imagining him going through my underwear draw but I wasn't mad, quite the opposite, I was touched he went through so much. I changed, tossed my old clothes in the hamper and walking into the bedroom. He was sitting on the edge of the bed, waiting for me. I walked into his arms, wrapping mine around him and resting against his bare chest.

"Thank you." His arms engulfed me, resting on the sore spot on my back. "How did you know?"

"I didn't at first, I just kinda woke up. Then I noticed you cringing in your sleep and you were holding your stomach. I thought maybe it was just upset but I...well I smelled the blood. It's not like a normal wound, I could tell the difference." My face probably resembled a tomato, but aside from the embarrassment was greatfullness, my man was extraordinary.

"How come you never told me you could tell?"

"I can't usually, I mean besides the crankyness, I don't usually smell it, but you were so close this time and iv always paid attention to when you got it, so I knew when not to piss you off." He chuckled.

"It's been a while tho hasn't it?" He asked timidly

"Yes, it's slowing. I only get it once every two month's now, grandpa think's at some point ill stop, just like normal human's. Even tho im fully grown I can still regenerate and heal." I hesitated, wondering if I should tell him the rest.

"He also thinks that it could be possible, in the future to have..to conceive. He want's to do some tests, to give me an anwser before.." I let my voice fade away. He leaned back, catching my chin in his big gentle hands, and looking into my eyes.

"Is that something you want?"

"Im...not sure.." I told him honestly. I hadn't really thought of it to much. He nodded, seriously.

"What about you?"

He was quiet for a moment, thinking. "I think..if it was possible I might, but it's not something I need. All I really need is you baby, the rest we can figure out later." He smiled gently, leaning down and kissing me.

"Come on, lets lay down." He slid up the bed, moving the blankets back and pulling me up with him. He kissed me again, wrapping his arms around me and fell back asleep quickly.

I woke on thursday, my bed empty and my mood sour. My body ached, and I had so little time left with my Jacob, everyone was probably coming home tomorrow. I went downstairs, in search of my Jacob. He was in the kitchen, making breakfest, Well, almost lunch. I was shocked at the time, I usally was up around 9.

"Goodmorning sleeping beauty." He smiled pleasantly.

"Mhmm." I sat down, wincing alittle at the movement. He frowned.

"Why didn't you wake me?" He chuckled.

"I tried, you all but bite my head off." I scowled at him.

"I did not." He studied me for a moment, and then smiled.

"Yes Dear." I rolled my eyes, and leaned against the counter, resting my head on my arms. It was throbbing.

"You okay baby?" He asked me, walking around the island.

"Everything hurts." I complained. It was always this way at first. Grandpa says while my body can change and adapt, it doesn't do so easily. The first day was always the hardest, but after that I was fine.

"Can you take anything for it?" I closed my eyes against the bright lights.

"No, they don't work with my system. Its always this way at first, ill be fine tomorrow. " I sighed. I felt his hot hand on my back, soothing the sore muscles snd he kissed my head.

"Are you hungry?" I thought about it, and nodded. I kept my eyes closed while he worked, trying to soothe my head.

"Here you go baby, what do u want to drink?" I opened my eyes, blinking againts the brightness. "Juice?" He nodded, going to the fridge and pulling out the apple juice, he passed the doorway and flipped the switches, miraculously lowering the brightness till just the sun shone in from the window. I ate, hungrier then I thought I was, and finished my cup of juice. I felt alittle better, but not much.

"What do u wanna do today? Im all yours." He grinned.

"Nothing." I tried to sit up, stretching my sore muscles. My abdomen contracted, sending cramps up my stomach. I groaned.

"Nothing it is." He said happily, putting the dishes in the sink and coming towards me. Before I could blink he had me in his arms, walking to the living room. He set me on the couch, and wandered around the big room, closing all the curtains till it was dark. He flipped on the tv, turning it down to a human whisper, but we could hear just fine. He joined me, pulling me up till I was almost sprawled on his chest, and tugging the throw blanket ontop of me. His heat felt amazing, even tho I was only a couple degrees cooler then him, and relaxed my body in no time. We watched tv, and at some point I fell asleep on him.

I was suprised when I woke up to hear a whisperd conversation. I listened, trying to distinguish the voices. Was that...mom and dad?

"Renesmee?" Dad asked. I opened my eyes, seeing him and mom standing bye the kitchen entrance. I was horizontal on the coach, very warm.

"Dad? Mom?" I was confused, trying to remember what had happend? I was watching tv with Jake...Jake? I realized then that I was indeed on the coach, still wrapped up tightly on his chest, his arms around me. Uh oh. A blush started creeping its way up my face, and I attempted to untangle myself from him.

"What are you guys diong home?" I asked in hopes of distracting them from my pillow. I tried crawling around him, but he didn't want to let me go.

"Well, your father and I decided to head back a little early...everybody else is coming home tomorrow.." mom said, her tone questioning. I finally managed to stand up, freeing myself from him, I looked at her and she looked amused, dad..not so much.

"Why don't we go talk in the kitchen?" He raised an eyebrow, and I nodded, following him inside. We sat at the island, and they were quiet, watching me.

"Soo..how was your trip?" Dad snorted, and mom just smiled alittle.

"Not a chance in hell little girl, wanna tell us how your week was?" Dad said. I fought to keep my thoughts to myself, but was relived when dad frowned.

"Bella." He said annoyed.

"She deserves to tell us what she wants, not what you hear." I sighed, relizing my thoughts were my own. It took mom a while to practice that one, but she could usually sheild anothers mind pretty well from dad when she wanted to.

"Well..my week was pleasant." Dad gave me an anoyyed look. "Fine, it was great. I don't know what you want me to say, clearly you saw us." I said, gesturing to the living room. Mom put her hand on dads shoulder, stopping him from responding.

"Were not interrogating you hunny, we were just asking. Did you and Jake work things out?" She asked me calmly. I smiled, nodding. Mom always had a better approach to things. She said me and dad were to alike, and she was the referee. She smiled also, and dad looked relieved.

"That's great baby, how long ago? You didn't mention anything on the phone." I felt alittle guilty, for not telling them sooner.

"Well, I didn't really know how to, or what to say..but it was saterday." Her happy expression didn't waver, but I saw the sadness in her golden eyes.

"We were going to tell you all when you guys came home, we were just...working things out." She nodded, not saying what I knew she felt. I would have to pull her aside later and tell her more.

"So how was your week?" She asked.

"Well on saterday I went out with Ally, then Jake made dinner and he said he couldn't fight it anymore, then on sunday he asked me out, and on monday I had some me time, on tuesday I talked to Ally most of the day, on wensday we went on a date, and here we are." I spread my arms out, motioning around us. I heard him shift in the other room, and prayed he would control his brain.

"Ness?" He called.

"In the kitchen." I said back, worrying. I glanced at mom who looked genuinely happy again, but dad was frowning, picking through Jake's thoughts im sure. He walking into the kitchen, rubbing his eyes, wearing the same pjs from this morning with no shirt. I vaguely wondered what time it was. He looked up, stopping in his tracks.

"Bells! Edward! W-what are you diong home so soon.." His eyes flickerd between my parents and me. I tried to give him a look, but he didn't hold my gaze.

"Whatever do you mean, Jacob. We live here, do we not?" Dad asked, toying with him. Jake gulped and glanced at me again.

"They know, they walked in to us asleep on the couch." I said. His eyes widened alittle, and he gulped. "And then I told them." He glanced between mom and dad.

"No Jacob, were not angry. " Dad said, he seemed to relax, walking over to me and rubbing my back. "We knew when we left that the possibility was there." He finished.

"More like we hoped bye leaving you would see sense." Mom said, laughing. Jake looked sheepish, but just sat down next to me.

We talked some more, about everybody's week, thankfully Jake seemed to be controlling his thoughts. Mom cooked us dinner, and they sat with us while we ate. I was thankfully feeling better, and I ate all my food.

I was finishing up when dad stiffened, turning to glare daggers at Jake. I swallowed, immediately worried, and mom just looked back and forth between the two.

"What did you just think?" Dad asked, angry know. Jake looked up, seeming to understand what he had done. I didn't understand, cause there was nothing to be angry over, we hadn't even done anything. Dad looked at me, still angry.

"You slept with him?" My face turned beat red, but I was instantly anoyyed.

"Literally, yes I did. I slept in the same bed as him, if that's what you mean, father." I snapped. He looked skeptical, but mom had her hand on his shoulder.

"That's not what I meant Edward, you know I wouldn't do that. Honestly." Jake said quickly, anoyyed also. Dad relaxed alittle, but not fully.

"That being true, it's still not proper." I sighed, but gave up that arguement for the night. I lost my last night with Jake alone, and I wanted nothing more then to curl up in his arms.

Annoyed, I finished eating and walked Jake to his place. He pulled me inside, wrapping his arms around me. I knew they could still hear us, but I didn't care.

"This sucks." I pouted.

"I know hunny, but it's okay. We knew they were coming home soon. " I sighed, pulling away and leaning up on my toes. He kissed me, tenderly, controlling himself.

I made my way upstairs a little while later, climbing into bed. It felt cold without him here, and I was sad. I fell into un uneasy sleep, dreaming of my Jacob.


	21. Chapter 21: Love and Passion

A/N: This scene just flowed so well in my brain i couldn't not write it right away. Im trying to decided which direction i want this story to go, so your reviews would be appreciated right know. Tell me what ya'll think.

* * *

It was an uncommon thing know a day's to get any alone time with Jake. Both of us had school, and Jacob had his pack responsibilities. It was a beautiful saterday and I finally got to get out of the house with just Jake.

We ran, finding are little spot in the meadow were he had first kissed me. Like last time I had a bag with a blanket and food. I packed extra, planning on staying all day. I laid out the blanket while Jake phased. I felt the invisible current run throught my body, and heard a slight shift of fabric.

I unpacked the food, placing it on one end of the blanket. His large hand grasped my arm, pulling me around to him. I was immediately in his arms, pressed tightly to his body. My arms, wrapped around his strong neck, and his around my back. I buried my face in his naked chest, breathing in his musky scent. He kissed my forehead, lingering on my skin. " I missed you soo much baby."

I understood exactly what he meant. Even if we were alone in a room, there was a minimum of three vampires in the house at all times that could hear everything. I never got more then a gentle kiss. Two months into are relationship, and I was losing my patience. I knew he wanted to take thing's slow, but a girl could only take so much.

"I know Jake. Me to."

I pulled back, leaning up on my toes and streching to his face. He smiled, and pressed his warm lips to mine. Once, twice. I sighed, happy to have him this close. He pulled back, sitting on the blanket. I pouted slightly eyeing him, as he started throught the food. He chuckled, watching me.

"Im hungry, come join me." I couldn't resist his plea, and sat down next to him, taking the sandwich from his hand. I started eating, it tasted pretty good.

One thing I had realized these past two month's, is that I was constantly desperate to touch him. Not in a sexual manner, but it was like no matter how far or close he was my hand was always on him. Either in his hand, or on some part of him. I wasn't sure if it was the imprint pull, or simply my desire to feel him beside me, to make sure that my beautiful jacob was there and real. He would tease me sometimes, like the time he was in the garage, and I came all the from my room, walked in, sat down a foot away and placed my hand on his bicep.

"Did you come all the way in here just to touch me?"

He had asked, chuckling under the hood. I rememberd my face heating up almostly painfully. Truthly, I hadn't even thought about what I was diong, it was like I was thinking of him, then he was there.

"Maybe." He laughed, and rolled out from the bottom, laying on a mat. He held his filthy hands up, winking.

"Come here, I can't touch you."

His smirk was sexy as hell and I leaned forward, takeing advantage of his dirty hands and pressing my lips firmly to his, my upper body hovering over his own. I knew if he had control he would have pulled away bye know, but I was in control. He was on the ground, with me above him. He was trapped.

I faintly heard the sound of my dad clearing his throught up stairs, and I sighed. No dam privacy. I leaned back, shooting an anoyyed look at the ceiling, but Jacob was grinning wide, his eyes shining with intrest. "I should get dirty more often." I giggled, and blushed. Kissed him once more and left.

My eyes focused back, and without thinking I layed my hand on his leg, taking another bite of food. He glanced at it, and chuckled, but didn't comment. We finished are food, and he leaned back on his hands, watching me.

"Why do you do that?" He asked, his voice full of curiosity. I raised my eyebrow.

"That." He clarified, eyeing my hand.

"Oh, im not sure. I don't really think about it most the time. I just like touching you." I said honestly, and then blushed. I pulled my hand away, embarrassed.

"Does it bother you?" I hadn't thought to ask him if he minded.

"Not at all, I love your hands on me." He said smiling and reaching for me, he pulled me between his legs, resting his back on a tree trunk and I leaned back into his chest.

His hands slowly slid up and down my arms, his fingers lightly stroking my skin. A shudder ran throught my body, and my head fell back againts his collarbone. My hands fell to his thights on either side of me, and I allowed my emotions to flow through me. My utter happiness at having him here with me, finally alone. His arms wrapped around my waist, and I felt his cheek rest on my head. My heart swelled, filling with love for my Jacob. Everything was right with him near me, and I sighed contentedly. It amazed me, how long it took everything to fall into place, and when it did, it was perfect. Everday spent with him, made me the happiest woman on earth. Growing up, I always knew I loved my Jacob. From the first time I saw him, I somehow knew he was mine. Made for me, and me for him. That love was developing into something stronger, more permanent. I was inlove with my Jacob, I knew it in every part of me. I only wondered if he felt it to.

His arms tightened, holding me firmly to him and he leaned over my shoulder, borrowing his face into my neck. His breath was hot on my skin, and his voice was a deep rumble, against my ear.

"I am soo in love with you." He whisperd.

I froze, checking but my palm's weren't touching his skin, they rested on his cutoff jeans.

"D-did you hear me?" I asked, confused. His word's hadn't quite registered yet. He shook his head, his lips running along my neck.

"I didn't hear anything, I just couldn't not say it."

His words trickled into my brain, breaking down my confusion and filling me with utter joy. I laughed, exuberant and channeled my inner vampirism, turning so fast I could make out the startled expression on his face. I landed in his lap, my legs on either side of him and I pressed my palms to his cheeks, running over my inner dialogue and showing how his words landed so perfectly. He grinned, wrapping his arms back around me and pulling me in for a kiss. I kissed him back, but I needed to say it, out loud to him. I broke free, pressing my forhead to his, and catching his eyes.

" I love you, my Jacob. So much." I saw his eyes, ignite with emotions, and his huge grin light up my world. He kissed me tenderly, his big hands on my waist

I couldn't help myself, I slid closer on his lap, pressing myself againts his hard chest and my hands slid to the back of his head, gently scratching his sculp. He hummed in appreciation, his hands tightening on my waist. Pleased with his responce, my mouth parted, and I breathed in his musky scent. Hesitantly, I ran my tongue over his bottom lip. His reaction was immediate, his body stiffened against mine and he pulled back.

"Nes-" I coverd his mouth with my hand, stopping him.

"No Jacob, I don't want to hear it. Im your girlfriend and I want you to kiss me." I huffed, getting annoyyed.

His hand reached up to grasp mine, tangling are finger's togather. "I dont know baby." He said calmly.

I sighed " Jacob, it's just a kiss. Im not asking you to sleep with me. " I said, exasperated at his unwillingness. His eyes faded slightly, concentrating on something in his head. I waited, looking at his face.

"Jacob." His eyes focused on me, and his dark russet skin held a pink undertone. Was my Jacob blushing?

"Huh?" He said, blinking.

"Did your imagination go wild there babe?" I laughed, and his face darkened. Yep, definitely blushing.

"Uhh...no" he mumbled, but I could tell he was lying. I just laughed again, I honestly didn't care what he had been imagining. I leaned closer, pressing a kiss to his neck and hovering near his ear.

"Jacob, I just want you to really kiss me, that's all. Nothing more. Please?" I said quietly. Lifting my head and looking into his dark brown eyes.

I smiled sweetly, and took advantage of his conflicted thoughts. I kissed him gently, running my fingers through his short hair. Slowly he seemed to come to life, his big hands running up my back, and tangled in my thick hair. I didn't want to push him to much, so I waited.

His hesitant lips pressed firmly to mine, and his hot breath mingled with my own. My mouth parted, taking in his scent and his warm tongue ran over my bottom lip. An electric tingle ran down my spine and I sighed happily. He groaned, deep in his chest and slowly explored my mouth. I couldn't keep from tangling myself around him. I slid closer to him, pressing myself against him and running my hands from his neck to his shoulders, holding him to me.

I couldn't even tell how long we stayed like that, tangled up in the clearing, are lips locked together. At one point I broke free for air, and his lips immediately landed on my neck, leaving hot open mouth kisses down and across my collarbone. I concentrated on keeping the sounds from escaping my mouth, but that was history when his lips landed on the tender spot below my ear, and he sucked lightly. One of his big hot hands ran down my waist, gliding over my hip, his long fingers brushing my ass, and continued down, running his palm over my jean coverd leg and back, gripping my upper thigh. His lips and hands were to much, overwhelming my ignited body and a loud moan escaped my mouth.

A deep blush coverd my body, and I heard the utterly most sexiest sound come from deep in his chest, a low growl tore its way from his lips, shocking us both. I wasn't afraid, oh no. My Jacob would never harm me, I was beyond turned on by his reaction to my sounds. It seemed to stun him, locking his body in place and his lips left my skin. His grip on me loosened, giving me a reprieve from the pressure of his body. I relized then how heavy both of are breathing was, my chest heaved with my breaths, and I heard his intake of air. It was still and quiet as I caught my breath, my body relaxing slighlty.

He pulled back alittle more, his hands letting me go and coming up to my cheeks. His face was difficult to read, he seemed..upset? My hand stroked his hair, and the other moved to his face, stroking the wrinkle between his eyebrows.

"What's wrong?" I asked softly.

He frowned." I didn't mean..I mean it was.." He struggled with words, getting more upset. I waited, trying to make sense of his mood.

"I growled at you." He hung his head, shameful. Was that what was wrong? I smiled alittle, sliding my hand under his chin and pulling up. I couldn't really make him, but he complied. I kissed him once, gently.

"Yes you did." I said matter of factly, and swallowed my embarrassment. " and it was incredible hot." I still couldn't help the blush. His mouth opened slighlty, and his eyes widened.

"What?" He asked, incredulously. I laughed, and leaned closer, wrapping my arms around his neck.

"You heard me, it was the single most hottest thing you've ever done." I told him. It didn't matter how I felt, I knew he needed to hear it.

He shook his head, disbelieving. "I don't believe you, your just saying that." I raised my eyebrow, and pressed my palm to his skin. I replayed the whole scene from my advantage point, the image and the emotions, the sound coming from him and the rush of desire that filled me. His eyes glazed over, watching the scene in his head. He was quite at first, and slowly his eyes seemed to focus back on me.

"Oh.." I couldn't help the small gigle that escaped.

"It didn't bother me, not in the least. I knew it wasn't aggressive. You couldn't help it, just like I couldn't." He grinned suddenly, his hands back on me pulling me closer.

" I understand what you mean, hearing you...knowing it was because of me...it was..nice."

"Just nice?" I raised my eyebrow. He grinned and leaned down, catching my mouth with his own. His lips parted, running his tounge over mine and slipping into my mouth. It was quick but heavy, leaving me short of breath. He pulled back, his own breathing uneven.

"Fuck Ness, it was hot as hell." I laughed, throwing my head back. He kissed my exposed neck, and just like that his words and lips rekindled the fire in me. His lips trailed across my skin, feather light. He pulled back quickly, his hand sweeping my hair back from my neck.

"Fuck." His tone worried me, distracting me from the ache. "Shit, not good." He muttered to himself.

"What is it?" I asked, concerned. His finger brushed my neck, hot.

"Dammit, I didn't mean to baby."

"Jacob. What the hell are you talking about?" I asked, getting annoyed.

He sighed. "I left a mark on your neck, I swear I didn't mean to." He looked guilty, but a strange feeling filled me. Was it..pride? Or maybe smuggness? Cause this incredible beautiful creature that sat before me was mine? His mark, weather intentional or not, was on me. I was his and no body else's, I knew for sure I definitely wasn't mad. I shrugged, running my hands up his bare chest.

"It doesn't bother me, I kinda like the idea." I smirked, leaned forward, pressing a open mouthed kiss on his neck, near his collorbone and sucking gentle. That same low growl sounded again, and I grinned pulling back. There on his russet skin was a quarter sized mark, just a few shades darker then its surrounding. His eyes were dark, excited. I tried to move closer again, but his hands restrained me.

"I think...I need a minute." He said, his tone strained. I nodded, accepting are little make out session was probably over. I slid my leg around him, climbing off his lap and laying out on the blanket.

It was quiet for a while, and I let my mind wander, to the last time we were here. Not much had changed, other then my family knowing, I missed are nights together alone. I wasn't aloud to sleep in the same bed as him, it was inproper. I hadn't slept with him since that first week, and I missed having his arms around me when I fell asleep, and woke up.

"What are you thinking about?" He slid down next to me, moving his arm under my head and pulling me against his chest. My hand rested on his bare stomach, and I showed him what I had been thinking.

"I know baby, me to." He kissed my forehead.

 _I don't get why I can't._

"You know why Ness, Edward doesn't want us getting carried away."

 _Like that would happen, like you would let that happen_. I rolled my eyes.

"I only have so much self control baby."

 _Ya right._ I thought alittle grudgingly.

"What's that suppose to mean?" He asked.

 _It means I didn't get a kiss for two years, and I had to talk you into really kissing me today, ill probably have to wait another two years till you sleep with me_. He snorted, pulling me closer into him.

"God I hope not." That peaked my interest.

 _So remind me what were waiting for_? I thought. I tried to control my thoughts, and only allow him into some of them.

"Well...I love you, and I want our first time to be special. You deserve so much baby, more then some fuck in the woods." His vulger language, while normally ignored, turned me on know. He leaned down, his lips inches from my ear. "You deserve romance and candles and we can't exactly do that in a house full of vampires. I promise Ness, one day I will make love to you, hopefully one day in this century." His sensual words spread a slow heat through my body, lighting a tiny flame in my center, and I had a feeling it wasn't going out anytime soon. My mouth was dry, and I couldn't speak. I tried sifting threw my emotions, storing the strong ones away for later. His hand fell on my hand, gripping it. That's when I realized my mental sheild was down, everything flowing into him.

"I know baby." He said, and I didn't have to respond. Cause he did know, he understood perfectly. I thought of the love I felt for him, swelling inside me like a huge tidal wave, engulfing every part of me, and pushed it into him. _I love you_ , was all I could think of. It didn't cover how I felt, not by a long shot, but it was the only thing that came close.

I sighed when the sun started descending, the forest growing darker. I didn't want to leave, who knew how long it would be again till I had him like this with me. We started packing, putting everything in the bag. I stood in the little clearing, it was are perfect world. He dropped the bag near my feet, looking down at me. I knew I was frowning, pouting like the 9 year old I was.

He wrapped his arms around me, his hands on my lower back. He pulled me against him, his body warm on mine. His lips touched mine, passionate and loving at the same time. One hand trailed up my back, pulling me tigher to him and the other slid slowly down, over the swell of my ass and stopping there, his fingers flexing. I moaned, pressing tigher to him.

He pulled away after a couple moments, kissing me once more and giving me a squeeze. He stepped back, reaching for the button on his shorts, they popped open, exposing another inch of dark skin. I relized then I was staring and turned a very bright shade of red. I spun quickly, my back to him. I heard his deep chuckle and the sound of moving fabric. I waited, but was starled when I saw his hand apper on my right, his shorts hanging from his finger, and I felt his lips on my head. He's such a dam tease. I grabbed the shorts, clearing my throat. I felt it then, the invisible current shimmer through the air. We ran back to the house, and when we got close he changed back, pulling on his shorts.

"Im ganna head right back to my place, I don't have a shirt. " he said, pulling me against him.

"Why does that matter? You've never had one before." I laughed.

"Yes well, I dont think your parents would appreciate your little mark." He grinned. Oh ya.

We walked the rest of the way, parting near his place with a gentle kiss. I sighed and headed upstairs, to my room.


	22. Chapter 22: Hunting

I woke the next morning, stretching out on my big bed. It still felt so empty without him here with me. I missed his arms around me, holding me close to him while I slept. It was more difficult then I thought, being away from him.

It was like everyday my feelings grew stronger, every day I wanted him by my side even more then before. I wondered what would happen when I graduated, would thing's stay the way they were, sleeping in different house's but spending all day together. I wondered were we would go from here, what was next? Surely we weren't like other couple's, there was nothing more for us but eachother. Of course there was family, and work, but my life would never again be complete without him.

I knew I would never be with anybody but him, but did that mean we were ready for something more? I was more worried about the idea of leaving mom and dad. Eventually we would go off on our own, but where would we go? Stay here, travel with my family?

I had a flash of a cozy log cabin, nestled somewhere in the woods. In that one image I smelled the sea brine of first beach, his home. I knew then at some point I would want to return, but I wasn't sure when or how.

I rolled, facing my favorite painting of him hanging on the wall. My mind swam with image's of yesterday, his hands holding me close, his hot mouth on my own. I tried to push them away, for my sanity, but also for dad's. I heard a relieved sigh come from down the hall and I rolled my eyes.

 _Out of which one of us do you truly think suffers the most with your little...gift?_ I thought.

He chuckled once, unamused. "Me." He said. I rolled my eyes again, listening to the whisper foorsteps coming towards me. A soft knock reverberated through my room.

"Come in." I said, sitting up alittle and pulling my warm blankets around me.

The door opened and my mom's inhumanly perfect face appeared. She smiled, stepping in and closing the door behind her, like everybody in the house couldn't hear us.

"Goodmorning sweetheart, How'd you sleep?" She sat on the edge of my bed, stroking my coppery hair.

"Morning mama." I smiled, loving the feel her soothing hands on me. "I slept fine." I shrugged, It would be better if Jake was with me, but I didn't push it.

"I was hoping you could make some time for your mom today.. how about we go for a hunt?" She asked, and I grinned. I use to go every week with my parents, but lately I only went every other. Sometimes it was just easier to have human food with Jake.

"Just us?" She smiled back, her lips curling at the edges. It always amazed me to think of her as truly human, fragile and flawed. I couldn't see it.

"Ya, just us. Why don't you change and we can leave?" I nodded and she stood up, heading for the door.

I got up and dressed quickly, pulling on some normal jeans and a sweatshirt I stole from dad around 5 years ago, over my tanktop. I slid on my sneakers, and pulled an elastic onto my wrist. I made my way downstairs, finding mom and dad near the kitchen, his arms wrapped around her.

"Im ganna check on Jake, I'll meet you outside?" She nodded, not taking her eyes off dad.

I rolled my eyes and left through the back door, making my way to his place and through the living room, down the hall. His door was open, and I could see him still passed out. I walked to him, crawling onto the bed and sitting on my knees, leaning over him.

"Jacob." I said sweetly. I placed my palm on his cheek, sending thoughts of his lips pressed to mine into his head.

"Jake..wake up." He twitched, reaching out for me and his eyes slowly blinked open.

"Goodmorning handsome." He seemed alittle out of it, his eyes on me but unfocused. "Jake?"

"Mhmm...ya?" He mumbled.

"You okay?" He nodded slowly.

"Mmm..Ya. I was dreaming about you then you were there..." He said sleeply. "But you have more clothes on then my dream." He said seriously. My head fell back and I laughed loudly. He chuckled alittle, his hands reaching for my waist.

"Sorry, didn't mean to say that out loud." He whispered. I grinned and leaned down, kissing him. He kissed me back, his lips softly touching mine, tenderly. I pulled away, amazed at his carefullness. His hands cupped my face, stroking my skin.

"Goodmorning beautiful.." He whisperd. I felt my skin heat up, pink creeping up my cheeks. He glanced at my clothes, my sneakers hanging off the bed.

"Im going hunting with mom, I just wanted to come see you before we left." I explained, resting my hands over his.

"Alright, ill see you when you get back?" I smiled and nodded. He pulled my face to his again, kissing me once, twice and I sighed when he pulled away. He smiled gently, at my protest.

"I know baby, go have fun.."

I climbed off his bed, leaning forward to press my lips to his. I pulled back just an inch, catching his eyes.

"I love you, my Jacob." His breathtaking smile light up my world, his eyes melting and catching fire. His hands stroked my face lovingly.

"I love you baby, more then everything." He whispered. I forced myself away from him then, heading back outside.

Mom waited about 10 feet away, a happy little smirk on her face. I blushed but made my way towards her, taking her outstretched hand and walking into the forest.

"I remember that feeling, believe it or not it only gets stronger." She smiled.

I can't even imagine feeling stronger about him then I do know. I thought.

"You'll see." She said wistfully. We made it to the fence, opening the gate and making are way into the national forest. We started running then, her keeping pace with my half human self.

We followed a trail into a large clearing, crouching down to observe. There was a large herd of deer, grazing in the long grass.

"Ready?" She whisperd. I nodded, setting my sights on a smallish buck.

I followed her que, sprinting into the clearing and landing swiftly on the bucks back. I snapped his neck quickly, hating to see him suffer, and sank my teeth into his jugular. The hot wet liquid ran down my throat, coating and soothing an ache I hadn't realized was there.

I filled quickly, dropping the corpse to the ground and brushing of dirt. I pulled my hair up into a bun, and searched for mom. She was making her way to me, her large buck already disposed of.

She laughed and pulled a leaf from my hair, dropping it to the ground. She cleaned up my buck, hiding him in a ditch and was back in seconds.

"Are you still thirsty?" I thought about it, I felt pretty full, it didn't take much to satisfy me.

"I don't think so, but ill come with you." She nodded, closing her eyes and taking a deep breath.

She took off to the north and I followed, keeping a distance behind her so as not to interrupt. I saw her lock her sights into a tree branch, and noticed a large bobcat stalking his prey below, a coyote.

I sat on a large boulder, watching her contemplate the best way to take him down. She launched her self high into the air, knocking him of his ledge and gracefully landing on her feet, her mouth already leaving his neck and dropping his lifeless body to the ground.

I was struck at how very feminine she could still look while killing and draining an animal almost her size. She was leathal. She disposed of the bobcat, making her way to me and perching beside me on the rock.

"This is nice, we don't get to spend enough time together." I said, pulling my knees up and resting my chin on them.

"You know ill always spend time with you, so will your father. No matter how old you get. Between your school and Jake, you don't have to much time for everything else." I frowned, had I been putting then aside for Jake?

"Oh no hunny, I didn't mean it like that. Of course were not upset, were so happy that you guys have figured it out finally. We don't feel neglected at all." She said, smiling sincerely.

"Its just that..I hate being away from him." I looked out towards the meadow, taking in the beautiful surroundings.

"I know, you don't have to explain that to me. Iv always felt that way about your father, even when I was human. I hated when he had to leave even to hunt." I nodded, understanding perfectly.

"Can I ask you something?" She asked, almost timidly. I debated what it could be, but I really didn't mind talking to her.

"Sure." I decided.

"How are you guys? You and Jake." I thought about her question, forming my response.

"Were really good mom, its like everything just fell into place. It's perfect. He told me he loved me yesterday." She laughed, and startled, I looked at her.

"Im sorry, I wasn't laughing at you darling. I was suprised it took him this long, honestly." She smiled. I laughed alittle to.

"I know, me to. Iv know for a long time, but I didn't want to overwhelm him. He still struggles with him self sometimes, he doesn't always believe his instincts. Hes always so careful, it drives me crazy sometimes." I laughed. She raised a perfect eyebrow, giving me a strange look.

"What?" I asked.

"Careful? Really? What about that hicky on your neck?" She laughed. My face turned red, and my palm came up to cover his mark, the one I had completely forgotten about.

"Oh well...I-I mean.." I studderd, embarrassed. She laughed again, enjoying this way to much.

"Calm down hunny, you don't need to be embarrassed. You need to understand as your mom it's my job to make sure your being careful. Were not sure what your body is capable off."

"I know mom, and were not diong anything. We were just kissing, we've talked about it but he wants to wait." She nodded, not suprised.

"And how do you feel about it?"

"Well...I get his point, he want's it to be special and it's not like that's something that could happen at home, but I guess I see it alittle differently. It doesn't matter when or where, all that matters to me is him. " She nodded seriously, smiling slightly.

"Your being very mature about it, im happy to hear that. Have you talk to Carlisle anymore about his tests he wanted to run?"

"No, for the most part I forgot about it."

I said honestly. I hadn't truly thought about it since the day in my room.

"Its best to be smart about these thing's, even if you don't plan on being together that way right know, you never know." I nodded.

"Your right, it would be best to know as much as possible right know, just in case." Of course she was right, wouldn't it be better to know if that was even possible, sooner rather then later?

"Renesmee, I want you to know that you're father and I, we know that your grown up and with Jake. Were happy for you, and we trust your judgment on your physical relationship with him, we just ask that you try to be discreet about it. And remember sweetheart, never do something your not ready for." She smiled gentle, and wrapped her stone arm around me, pulling me into her side.

"I know mama, and thank you, for letting me..I dont know, just be I guess. It means alot to me, that you guys respect my decisions as an adult." We sat in silence for a while, and I got lost in my own thoughts.

I knew that Jacob would never coerce me into anything, he would wait a lifetime if I wanted him to. But I wondered if I was as ready as I thought I was. Of course I wanted him, what sane woman in the world wouldn't? He was a stunning creature, only made better by the fact he was put on this earth for me.

I knew I loved him, more then anything. There was a desire to be tied to him in everyway humanly and inhumanly possible. I craved more then his physical body, I yearned for his soul mixing with mine, his heart beating to the same rythem as my own. I dreamed of the moment we would be so twisted together, it would be impossible to tell one body from another, connected to him in everyway.

I wanted it, but was I completely ready for it? Obviously I wasn't as prepared as I thought if I had forgotten to talk to grandpa about his tests. Jake was right about having privacy for something so intimate, surely I want to be very very far away from any family, and who was I to deny him the right to romance and woo me? So while I wasn't positive on my awnser at the moment, I decided I would revisit the question at a later date. Mom sat up, brushing the invisible dirt from her jeans.

"Are you ready to head back?" She asked, slipping off the boulder. I nodded, and climbed down. We made are way home, leisurely, chatting about school and trivial things. She paused a couple miles out, reaching behind me and gently yanking the hair tie from my bun.

"Maybe some thing's dad doesn't need to know." And she winked. I pulled my hair around me, covering his mark.

"Like that will work, he'll hear it eventually." I said, alittle irritatingly.

"Oh no, we've had a long discussion. He is to try his hardest to stay away from your's and Jake's minds, and im going to help when I can. As long as you guys are in the same room as me ill sheild you. Plus, were not here most nights, so your dreams are safe and yours." She said happily, and I could tell she was glad she had won that argument.

"Thanks mama, really. I appreciate the small amount of privacy I can get."

We made it home then, and I went straight to Jake's. I saw dad meet mom at the forest and they disappeared back into it, so I figured I was safe for alittle.

I walked in, immediately seeing him sprawled scross his large leather couch, watching some action movie. Gatsby was climbing up and down the floor to ceiling cat tree we had installed, and hazel was curled up on the back of the cushion near Jake's head. He smiled happily at me when I walked in, and I kicked off my sneakers, leaving them by the door. I went to the kitchen, grabbing two drink's and walked back, setting them on the coffee table. I pulled the hoodie off, tossing it on the arm rest of the chair in the corner. He watched me move, fixing my tank top that had been disheveled.

I eyed him for a moment, planning my course of action. He had on his normal basketball shorts, and no shirt. I walked around the table, setting my knee between his and lowered myself directly on top of him, my head resting on his shoulder. His arms immediately engulfed me, resting on my back. He kissed my head, his hand rubbing circles.

"How was your day?" He asked softly.

I snaked my hand up to his neck, pressing my palm to his bare skin. I replayed some highlights, running and hunting, talking to mom on the big rock and strolling are way home.

"What did you and Bell's talk about?"

 _Mostly us, she wanted to make sure we were being safe and that I was happy_. His hand trailed up my back, stroking softly, and back down, finding the gap between my top and jeans and running back and forth on my bare skin.

"What did you tell her?"

 _The truth, I told her I was extremely happy, that I loved you more then anything_. His grip tightened, holding me close and his hand slipped under the edge of my top, following my spine faintly.

"I love you so much hunny." He whispered in my ear.

 _I know Jake_.

"What did u tell her about us?"

 _Nothing specific, I told her we were waiting, but when the time came we would be careful, and there respecting are choices, they relize that were both adults._

He was quite, stroking my back slowly. I was curious tho, and lifted my torso up, glancing towards his face.

"You okay Jake?" His eyes focused on me, his concentration returning and he smiled. The hand not trapped under my top cradled my face, holding me closer.

"Ya baby, I'm fine. I was just thinking about how lucky I am, your such an incredible woman, I don't know what I ever did to deserve you." He smiled gently.

I blushed, feeling monopolized. He had this whole thing backwards. I was the lucky one, how did I make him see that?

"No Jake, you have it all wrong. My whole life you've been there, always when I needed you, in what ever way I needed. You had to wait so long for me to grow up, know that were together I just have to remind myself that we have time. We have forever to be together, but I still can't believe your mine sometimes. Your the most gentle and patient and loving man and your mine, its so surreal sometimes."

His smile only grew larger the more I talked, and when I stopped he pulled my face to his, kissing me passionately. His hand slid further up my back, pressing between my shoulder blades and holding me closer, the other left my face, sliding down my body and cupped my ass firmly. He moaned, deep in his chest and kissed me harder.

We pulled apart a few minutes later, and I layed my head back on his chest, listening to his strong heartbeat, and staying in his arms the rest of the day.


	23. Chapter 23: Bad Dreams

A/N: I was so happy to see two reviews in almost one day that I just had to finish this chapter for you guys! Your one of my biggest motives guys, seeing someone besides myself enjoy this story makes me beyond happy!Enjoy!

* * *

Two month's, six day's, twenty-one hours. That's how long iv been blessed with the knowledge that she was mine, that she chose me. Six day's, twenty-one hours, and thirty six minutes since I told her that I was in love with her. Six day's, twenty-one hours, and thirty seven minutes, since my world stopped spining, since she told me she loved me. One year, two month's, six day's, twenty-one hours, thirty something minutes since I actually admitted to myself that I was inlove with her.

It had taken me so long, to get my head out of my ass and be a man. To finally understand that I wasn't diong what was best for her. Oh no. I was scared, being a boy. To afraid to stand up and be the man she needed. I didn't see it at first, my Ness didn't need anybody. She could handle herself just fine, but she always loved with everything she had. If she loved you, you were the luckiest creature on earth. But if she didn't, you better hope she never got close enough to show you. I always assumed it was the reason she was better off without my stupid ass druling after her.

It was that moment at dinner on her birthday when I realized that what I was diong could be the thing to run her off. It tilted my world upside down, spinning till I felt sick and dizzy. I couldn't let this happen, I couldn't let my Ness be taken by some prepubescent boy. No, she needed a real man, and I had to be that. I felt the last part of my resistance fall away, breaking the notions of to younge and not ready from my mind. She was ready, and she was a woman who knew what she wanted, and by some mercy, it was me.

That first week was beyond heaven, waking with her in my arms. Spending hours wrapped around her, making breakfast and dinner together, and at the end of the day, getting to hold her till she feel asleep. I struggled at first, trying to draw the line in my head of were was safe to put my hands, and how close to hold her. I wasn't as hard as I thought it would be, I was raised a certain way, to never push a lady into anything, and I knew once Edward got back he would be able see everything. And then I kissed her, and she kissed me and I was positive in that moment that there would never be nothing on this earth that could ever compare to her lips.

Things weren't all that different once everybody else got home. I didn't get to sleep in her bed anymore, and we were always within ear shot of vampire's, but it didn't stop me from kissing her, and holding her close to me whenever I could. As the month's passed I often wondered why I had made such a big deal of thing's, it wasn't all that different from how we use to be. But she was happy, and that was all that mattered know.

I don't think she realized how much she tests my self control, that day in the clearing last week, watching her practically beg for me to kiss her. I couldn't deny her even if I wanted to. Part of me prayed that she would never realize if she truly wanted something and asked me for it, I would give it to her no matter what. If she had asked me to lay her down then and there and love her I would of, with everything I had. At least for know I was safe, I think she understands what I want, and know's we should wait. I loved how very comfortable she was with me, laying on me on the sofa last week, telling me about her day. Every time she said she was happy, everytime the words I love you fell from those perfect lips, I wanted to crush her to me, and simultaneously yell to the world that this gorgeous, sexy, and loving woman was mine. I fell asleep that night, dreaming of her.

I woke, startled for some reason to the dark room around me. It was still pitch black, the moon high in the sky. My eyes searched the dark room, observing. I zeroed in on a slim figure, standing in my doorway.

It only took my extended eye sight second's to make out her long coppery hair, her arm's wrapped around her small frame, clutching her stuffed wolf.

"Jacob?" She whisperd, taking a small step into my room, the moonlight hitting her face. Her voice was small, and her bottom lip quivered. She had fat tears rolling down her delicate cheeks, and she sniffed.

I pulled my blankets back, ignoring the fact I was only wearing boxers and immediately went to her.

"Nessie baby, what's wrong? Its okay. Your safe."

I grabbed her close to me, feeling her small body rock with sobs. Her arms wrapped tightly around my neck, burying her face into me. I felt the hot tears hit my skin, and my heart ached for the woman in my arms, throbbing from her pain.

"Shh, its okay baby. Calm down. It's okay."

My words didn't seem to affect her, she didn't stop crying. So I reached down, grabbing her leg's and pulling her up to me. She wrapped them around my waist immediately, in a death grip, holding me harder. I stroked her back, holding her as tight as I could. She felt very hot, overly hot.

"Renesmee. Stop. Breath. Tell me what's wrong." I heard the alpha tone mixed in with my words, but they seemed to work. I walked back to my bed, being careful not to jostle her and sat on the edge. She hiccupped, but was getting control of herself. It was killing me, to see her this way.

"Ness please." I pleded, feeling useless.

Her tears had slowed, and her heartbreaking sobs were reduced to deep breaths and small breathless hiccups.

"J-Jake, y-you were d-dead." She managed to get out, before her tears overwhelmed her again.

It dawned on me then that she must of had a bad dream, and had seen me in some way die. I understood, even I would be crumbled to a blubbering mess if I had to seen her die. But I wasn't dead, and I had to get her to calm down before she made her self sick. I didn't like how hot her body felt, hotter even then mine.

"Its okay baby. Im fine, it was just a bad dream."

I stroked her hair, and pressed kisses to her cloth coverd shoulder. It took a while to get her to calm down again. Finally I could pry her death grip from my neck, hold her face in my hands. It was red, and her eyes were puffy from crying so much. She wiped her face with her sleeve, trying to get rid of the evidence.

"Nessie baby, it was just a bad dream. Im right here, im not going anywere. I promise." She nodded slightly, but I could tell she was still shaken. I supported her weight and stood, turning around and setting her down gently. She was reluctant to let go, but I knelt infront of her.

"Calm down baby, your ganna make yourself sick. Your temperature's already hotter then mine." I noticed then what she was wearing, long cotton pj pants and a long sleeve shirt. Even in the middle of November here it didn't get very cold. She must of been boiling.

I kissed her forehead, and stroked her cheek. "Can you stay here, for just a minute? Ill be right back." I saw the panick in her eyes, but she nodded.

I went quickly to my attached master bath, flipping the light on and going over to my supply shelf, and picked out a soft face cloth, and tossing in the sink and turning on the cold water. I rung it out, getting rid of the access water and went back to my room, heading to my dresser and picking out a tshirt I knew was loose on me.

I put it beside's her, kneeling down again and gently ran the cool cloth over her face, running over her hot forehead, and carefully over her puffy eyes. I heard her sigh slightly, and hoped it felt good. Hoped I was taking care of her the way I wanted. Some of the red started to fade, her face cooling down.

"There you are beautiful." She gave me a small smile.

"I don't like how high your temperature is, I want to get you out of these thick clothes. Can you put this one for me?" I handed her my shirt, and she nodded, her cheeks turning just slightly pink. I stood up, turning around to give her some privacy. I heard the sounds of fabric fall to the floor, and moment later her sweet voice.

"Im done." It was still small, but didn't sound so scared. I turned, taking her in. My black tshirt was large, hanging looser on one shoulder and stopping mid thigh.

"You didn't have to turn you know, I don't mind." She said, and I chuckled.

"Maybe know isn't the best time for that." I responded, remembering then that I was only wearing boxers. She looked at me, her eyes wide. I wasn't worried about that, she didn't need anything physical right know, she just needed to know I was there.

I leaned forward, scooping her in my arms and up onto the bed. I layed her down, climbing in beside's her and pulling the blanket over us.

"Jacob, what about dad?" She asked, sadly, like I would remember him and send her away.

"Ill deal with him later, he'll get over it. Im not leaving you. Im not ever leaving you sweetheart." She cuddled close into my chest, tucking her head into my neck and pressing her body to mine.

"I love you, My Jacob." She whisperd, and my heart swelled, filling my soul with an all consuming love for this woman.

"I love you baby, soo much." I tilted her face up, softly kissing her lips, and then pulled her as tight as I dare, hiding her small frame in mine.

She shudderd a few times, trying to take deep breaths. Eventually her heart rate evened out and I felt her grow slack in my arms. It terrified me how she responded so extremely to stress and anxiety. She wasn't easily susceptible to normal illness and climate, but I could still feel her, hot against my skin, nothing felt hot to me. I tried to distance myself, afraid my added body heat would only make it worse, but she whimpered and clung to me.

Afraid she might be having another bad dream I lifted one of her small hands, pressing it to my cheek. Image's floated around her unconscious, me and her, together, or just me. I didn't let sleep overcome me, holding her tight and watching her peaceful dreams as the sky slowly lightened.

I waited till dawn, and carefully untangled myself from her, slipping on shorts and watching her to make sure she didn't wake. When I was satisfied she was still deeply asleep I crept out of the room, walking over to the back porch of the big house and sitting on a step. I could still hear her slow breathing and steady heartbeat, so I was reassured while I waited.

I didn't have to wait to long, I was outside for only half an hour when I heard the quiet footsteps. _Hey, Edward? We gatta talk man_. I thought, knowing he would hear me. A moment later they broke through the tree's, his eyes searching for me. He frowned, but pulled Bella forward, stopping a few feet from me.

"Jake? What's going on? Why is Renesmee in your room?" Bella asked, her tone saturated with worry.

 _First of, its not what you think. Ness had a bad dream, a really bad one and she came to me. She was nearly inconsolable, making her self sick with worry. It was bad._

"Is she alright know? Does she still feel hot? I should take her upstairs." He made a move for the door, but I put my hand out.

 _No, leave her be, she's sleeping_. He raised an eyebrow at me, probably because of the alpha tone that seemed to flowed out of me.

"You two stop it! Jake tell me what's going on." Bella said angrily, she hated when we had one sided conversations. I put my hands up in defense.

"Its okay Bell's, Ness just had a real bad dream, she freaked out alittle bit but she's alright know." I told her calmly.

"What's this about her temperature?" She demanded.

"She was so upset she was making herself sick, she was really hot and worked up."

"What did she dream that had her so upset?" It was Edward this time, who spoke.

" I didn't get much out of her, all she said was that I was...dead. she was.." I trailed off, remembering how long it took her to calm down.

"Listen for tonight just leave her be, let her sleep. Ill talk to her in the morning, I just wanted to let you guy's know what was going on."

Edward persed his lips, but Bella placed her hand on his shoulder and nodded. I sighed and stood up, making my way back.

"Thank you Jake, for being there." Bella said, and I was greatful also, that she came to me. I just headed back inside, finding her in the same spot and sliding into bed.

Weather she noticed me leave I wasn't sure, but she definitely knew I was here know, curling quickly into me and I held her, finally letting sleep take me.


	24. Chapter 24:Territorial

A/N: Here it is! I love this chapter and the development between these two! Reminder that this story is rated M for a reason! Enjoy and everybody have a wonderful thanksgiving!

* * *

It's been one week, since her first nightmare. That morning after I woke up, just a couple hours after falling asleep, was normal, but it didn't last. It wasn't long after I heard her heart start to beat faster, and she shifted alittle in my arms, stretching. She woke up slowly, pulling back and looking up shyly at me. I leaned down, catching her lips to mine, and kissing her tenderly.

"Goodmorning." She laughed, leaning back from me.

"Morning beautiful, how'd you sleep?" I asked, pulling her back to me. I loved the feel of her againts me, holding her safely in my arm's. She looked better, more relaxed, and from what I could tell her temperature was back to normal.

"Better, I'm still tired tho. Did u see mom and dad?" She asked, pulling the blankets back from herself. The cool air hit me, but I barely felt it.

"You should take it easy baby, and ya, I talked to them this morning." I reached for her, trying to pull her back to me.

"Come back."

"Hold on, Jake. Stop, I have to pee." She laughed, crying to crawl over me. I let her go, watching her walk into the bathroom and close the door. I pulled my blanket back, not ready to get up quite yet.

We took it easy that day, eventually making are way to the big house. Bella and Edward were happy to have her their but I couldn't help but feel anoyyed. She should be in bed with me, not surrounded bye everybody answering a thousand questions.

When night fell I followed her up stairs, tucking her in and sitting on the bed till she fell asleep. I went to my room, passing out quickly from the lack of sleep. When morning came she looked so tired, and I could only guess why she couldn't sleep.

By wednesday I was worried, her temperature was back up, and she looked dead on her feet. She didn't have much of an appetite, and I practically forced her to eat something. Carlisle was watching her carefully, the rest of her family hovering. I could tell this was bothering her more then anything, it was impossible for her to have any privacy, it was probably driving her crazy. I tried shutting them out whenever I could, talking quietly to just her, or turning my back on them. I understand they were her family, but couldn't they see she just needed some time alone. She kept having nightmares, every time seeing my death in some different way, I didn't understand why they were happening, but it was torture to watch.

It was thursday night, and I was worked up, angry at this point that they wouldn't just let me sleep in her room, or her mine. It wasn't like they couldn't hear us for god sake, couldn't they understand she needed me? That I needed her? It was beyond ridiculous at this point. She was getting no sleep, and she was getting sicker, Carlisle couldn't find any reason other then her lack of sleep and nightmares.

I was so attuned to her my ears picked up the increase in her heartbeats, listening to it take off faster then normal, even for her. I jumped out of bed, already dressed and headed for her room.

I made it there in seconds, her door was already open, Edward and Bella near her bed, but she was still asleep, tears falling down her face. I pushed passed them, stroking her cheek.

"Nessie, wake up hunny. Come on." I said softly, watching her immediately take comfort from my presence, but she was whimpering now and it only made me angrier.

"Renesmee, wake up." I said firmly, letting my alpha voice speak, and miraculously she did, her eyes opened, finding me and filling with fresh tears.

"Jake." She cried, reaching for me. I got up, sitting next to her and pulling her into my arms.

"Its okay baby, I'm alright. I'm not going anywhere." I said, reassuring her. I tried to block out Bella and Edward, ignoring them and rocking her slowly. She calmed down alittle, her tears slowed, and eventually stopped.

"Jake, I." She looked up, stopping when she saw her parents. She blushed, hiding her face again.

"Its okay hunny, im not going anywhere." I said again.

"Jacob, you know how I feel abo-" Edward started.

"No." I said, trying to control my emotions.

"Ja-" Bella started this time.

"I said no. Im done. Im done following these stupid rules, she's my imprint and you said you would respect are decision's. She's grown and if we decided to sleep in the same bed that's are dam choice. It's not your business or anybody else's." My hands shaked slightly, my anger getting the best of me and I was nearly shouting by the end. I knew I would feel bad come tomorrow, but today I just wanted my imprint to be alright.

I glanced up, noting Bella's sad but accepting expression. Edward, on the other hand, looked furious.

"You don't get to decided what happens to her, she's our daughter, and she's only 9!" He argued back, taking a step forward. Bella followed, trying to get his attention.

"Now hold on Edward, we can't make decision's for her." Bella tried to reason.

"Oh yes I can. Im her father!"he yelled.

Ness sat up suddenly, her face red, but from anger this time. She leaned away from me, up onto her knees. She had Bella's temper, which only meant when she was mad, she was pissed.

"That's not fair and you know it. Jake's right, its none of your business what we do. You don't have any say over this and you know it." She demanded, her face growing redder. This wasn't what I wanted, I didn't want her fighting with her family.

"Now hold on young lady!" He exclaimed.

"Ness I didn't me-" I started, but she cut me off, giving me a dark look that clearly said shut your stupid mouth.

"ALRIGHT! Everybody needs to calm down now!" Bella shouted. All are heads snapped in her direction.

"Edward, you need to stop. Renesmee has every right to make her own choices regarding Jake. You use to stay with me when I was human almost every night, there is no difference. I SAID NONE." She spoke louder, cutting him off before he could speak.

"Good. Then were leaving." Ness said flatly, standing up and taking my hand.

"Im going to sleep in Jake's room, goodnight." She tugged on my arm, and mechanically I followed, being towed through the house and into my home.

I felt horrible, I didn't mean to cause a fight. I just couldn't hold myself together anymore, I snapped and it all came spilling out. I focused before we hit the hall way, and I ducked down, pulling her into my arm's. She rested against me, sighing contentedly.

"Im sorry Ness, I didn't mean for that to happen." I placed her on my bed, sitting beside's her.

"I know Jake, but it was only a matter of time. It was getting old, trying to follow those ridiculous rules, and mom's right, he's being a hypocrite." She shook her head, exasperated and climbed up the bed, crawling under the cover's and held her hand out for me. I faintly heard the sound of footsteps, heading out to the forest, and knew it must of been Edward and Bella leaving.

I pulled my tshirt off, tossing it on the computer chair, and tugged my socks off, aiming for the hamper by my dresser. I popped the button on my jeans, yanking them down my leg's. When I stood up she was half coverd by the big blanket, but her visible cheek was bright pink. I smirked, standing in my room in my plaid boxer's.

"Do you want me to put on pants?" I grinned. Her eyes narrowed, and she tried to hide her pink face.

"Nope. I don't mind." She said, trying to act cool. I laughed, pulling the cover's from her and sliding in. Being naked, or almost naked wasn't something that bothered me. Being in a pack tought you quickly that it was an unavoidable part of life, and you got use to it.

I pulled her to my bare chest, taking comfort in having her so close again. I could feel her relax, practically melting into me. She was out cold in minutes, me following soon after.

When I woke up it was still dark out, but I could tell it was late. I could make out the pounding rain on the roof, and the dark cloud's covering the sky. I was on my side, facing the windows with her wrapped up in my arms, her back against my chest. I took a moment to evaluate, it definitely wasn't early, which mean she had missed school, but I didn't care much about that. What worried me at the moment was how tightly she was pressed to me, her ass nestled into my hips, and there was no way if she was awake she couldn't feel me. But her slow breathing and steady heartbeat told me she was still asleep, so I shifted alittle, pulling my hips back from her.

My movement was enough to register with her, and she moved to, rolling onto her back and stretching. I watched her, as she slowly grew conscious, her eyes fluttering open and taking in her surroundings. They landed on me, and a small smile splayed on her face. She curled back into me, her face pressing to my neck and she still felt hot.

"Goodmorning baby." I whisperd, kissing her head. "How'd you sleep?"

"Better with you here. Jake please don't make me sleep alone anymore. I can't handle the dream's. " She asked me quietly, hope and saddness in her voice, and it broke my heart.

"You never have to sleep alone again sweetheart, not ever." I told her confidently, there was no way in hell I could make her go through that again.

She clung to me, and I rubbed her back, trying to soothe her. I held in her in my arm's for a while, but when I felt her shiver I got worried.

"Are you cold?" She shrugged her shoulder's but I felt her body shiver again. I placed my palm on her face, feeling her flaming skin against mine. How could she be shivering, but feel so hot? She looked better, but she probably still needs rest.

"Ness baby, your body still needs time to heal. You have to take it easy. Your temperature's still high but your shivering. Why don't I run you a hot bath?" She thought for a moment, then looked up and smiled.

"That sounds really nice actually. I'll have to go get some clothes tho." She frowned.

"Don't worry about that, ill get them. You stay here." I kissed her and slid out of bed, heading into the bathroom.

When I first moved in I wondered why Esme had gone through the effort to add a tub in my bathroom, but I thanked her now as I turned on the hot water, plugging the drain and looking through the fully stocked closet, picking out some bottle that said bubble bath and looked light purple. I added a squirt and walked back to my room, scooping her startled self into my arms and I placed her on the tiled floor infront of the tub.

"I'll be right back, is there anything specific you want from your room?"

"No, just grab anything. Thank you Jake." She stretched on her toes, wrapping her arms around my neck and kissed me. I ran my hands down her back, holding her to me for a moment then stepped away, closing the door behind me.

I pulled on basketball shorts, and a tshirt, walking out into the downpour and into the big house. I went straight for her room, opening the door but I wasn't the only one in there. Little Alice stood in the middle, a pile of clothes in her hand and a small frown on her face.

"I thought you might need some help, don't worry, there all comfortable." She smiled then and offered the clothes to me.

"Thank's shorty, I probably would of come up with some freaky outfit." I took the pile from her and she grinned briefly, but was serious.

"Give Nessie my love Jake." She asked sadly.

"Sure thing Alice, she's only a couple feet away. Just give her some time to relax, okay?" She nodded, and was gone. I checked the pile, going through my checklist. Two pants, two tops, socks, underwear and a bra. I pulled her closet door open, grabbing her favorite sweater of the hook and on her desk her sketchpad, and heading back down stairs. Esme stood by the door, a large bowl in her hands.

"Jacob, I made some soup for you and Renesmee." She held it out to me and I took it.

"If she feels ill, please call carlisle." She said sounding worried.

"I will Esme, I'm sure she just needs some good sleep and a relaxing weekend. Thank you tho." I said sincerely, balancing the big bowl on the stack, and pulling the door open.

I hurried through the rain, making it inside before anything got really wet and put the bowl on the counter. I went into my room, putting her clothes down on the bed, and her sketchpad on the night stand. Then knocked lightly on the door.

"Your stuff's out here baby, Esme made you some soup."

"Okay.." She said softly. I stepped away, going to wait in the living room.

"Jake?" I stoppped, stepping back to the door.

"Ya sweetheart?"

"Can you come in here?" Her voice was low, quiet. I didn't think it would carry all the way to the big house. I thought about it, but I couldn't deny her, so I turned the handle, slowly pushing the door open and stepped in.

She was straight out of my fantasies. She had pilled her curly hair up into a bun, but some peices escaped, plastered to her damp skin. The tub was so large she sat in the middle, her knee's pulled up and her arms wrapped around them. The hot soapy water sat right below her shoulder's, covering but only exciting me more. My eyes fell to hers, and she was watching me, watch her. I closed the door, taking the couple steps to her and knelt down.

"What is it baby?" My hand raised, stroking her pink cheek.

"I..I just..didn't want you to leave." She said shyly. I smiled, and sat down, leaning side ways to face her. I was so tall I could lean my elbow on the edge of the tub, my arm hanging over the water.

She stretched her arm out, taking my hand.

"How are you feeling?" She smiled alittle, her cheeks tinged with pink.

"Better, but I'm a little tired."

"Well when your done I want you to eat something, then we can lay down." She nodded, resting her head on her crossed arm and watching me.

I couldn't take my eyes off her, the bath steamed, rising and dancing around her body, and I prayed Edward wasn't anywere near us. I didn't hear him or Bella so they must not have returned yet, and a brief feeling of guilt washed over me, but one look at Ness and it was gone. It had to be done, it was what she needed, they just had to deal with it.

She closed her eyes, relaxing into the hot water but her hand didn't let me go. I could tell she was going to be alright, I wasn't as worried as the rest of them. I knew what exhaustion and bad dream's did to a human, even a half human, so I could finally relax myself. I let my eyes wonder over her, taking in every detail. Her fair skin, ligher then mine, but not quite like a vampire's, her's was creamy, and perfect. Her face looked so relaxed, peaceful. Her long eyelashes fanned out on top of her cheeks, her perfect lips pressed lightly together. I wanted nothing more in that moment then to kiss her, but I continued, my eyes following a trail down her neck. My mark was gone, faded away and I was surprised at how upset I was at that, some part of me liked marking her, claiming her as mine.

I stopped my self from letting my sight zero in on her in the water, I was already to turned on for my own good.

"What are you thinking?" She asked quietly, and when I looked up her eyes where open, watching me. I grinned sheepishly.

"Your naked, and gorgeous." She blushed and ducked her head slightly.

 _Am I gorgeous become I'm naked?_ She used her connection to my hand, to talk privately. I frowned.

"Absolutely not, your perfect no matter what you wear, or don't wear." I winked, causing her to blush some more.

 _So your thinking about me, naked?_

"More like trying not to, and failing." She smiled.

 _Why are you trying not to?_ My eyes narrowed, watching her. I moved closer, dipping low close to her face.

"Cause I can hear Esme in the kitchen and I'm pretty sure she doesn't want to hear us." I whisperd, causeing her cheeks to flame red. I let my hearing fade out, retreating back to our world. She sighed, and I laughed alittle.

"Come here." I whisperd, shifting back to my knees and leaning over. I held her face, pressing my lips to hers. She responded enthusiastically, kissing me passionately. Her arm wrapped around my neck, the water dripping down my skin.

I felt her shift, trying to lean closer to me and I retreated, her arms sliding from me. She pouted when I leaned away, and I couldn't help but laugh.

"If you moved anymore we were going to have a problem." She blushed again, but leaned back. I let my eyes wonder the bathroom, trying to calm my body enough to at least stand.

"Thank you, Jacob...for taking care of me.." she said lovingly and placed her palm on my cheek.

 _I love you, so much._ I smiled, holding her small hand to me.

"I love you baby, and I'm always going to take care of you." She smiled, her hand falling from my face and back to her knee's.

"Im ready to get out, could u get me a towel?" I got up, walking over to the supply closet and picking a large soft blue towel. I went back to the tub, and she pulled the drain, setting it on the side.

I unfolded the large towel, holding the corners out wide infront of me. She stood up, lifting her arm's and I wrapped the towel around her body, my arms holding her and lifted her over the bath lip, and set her down. I tried to concentrate on taking care of her, not about her wet body barely covered. I rubbed her back, and she folding her arm's against the front of her towel, leaning forward into me.

"Your clothes are on my bed, do u want me to grab them?" She nodded but didn't move away from me. She was pushing my self control, standing against me in just a towel. I restrained my hands from wondering, resting them on her lower back and holding her to me. She giggled then, and pulled away.

"Go ahead, I can feel the tension in your body." She laughed again, and somewhat relieved I stepped away, pulling the door open and making my way into my room. I left her sweatshirt on the bed, and took her clothes going back into the bathroom.

"Alice actually put these together for you, and she asked me to you send her love."

I put them on the counter, and picked up her discarded clothes from the floor. She went throught them, pulling some out and handing me back the other's. I left then, putting her dirty clothes in the hamper and the clean ones ontop of my dresser and going into the kitchen.

I made two bowls of soup, heating them in the microwave and placing them on the counter. She came out a moment later, dressed in long yoga pants, her feet coverd in socks and a loose tanktop hanging from her otherwise bare shoulders.

"Your's is already heated up, would u like a drink?" I pulled the door open on the fridge, grabbing two waters and putting them on the counter. She sat on the stool, pulling her bowl towards her and started eating. I joined her then, downing my soup in a couple gulps.

"I think you should go hunt this weekend, we can't forget about your vampire side." I told her. She nodded, finishing her food and putting the bowl down.

"Ya, I was thinking about that earlier. I'll go on sunday. But for now, how about a nap?" She turned, leaning forward towards me. I kissed her, gently, getting lost in the feel of her soft lips on mine. She pulled back, smiling.

"Let me put these in the sink." I took the bowls to the sink, leaving them for later and walked back, scooping her into my arms.

I walked to my room, laying her down in the middle of the bed and stepped back. I pulled off my shirt, tossing it on the floor and climbing into bed. I laid back, pulling the blanket over us and she curled up to my chest. Her head resting over my heart. She dozzed in and out for a while, always cuddled up close to me. I feel asleep shortly, but mostly held her.

When I looked towards my bedside table to check the time, her sketchpad caugh my notice, and I picked it up. I opened it, going through the first few pictures. There were mostly landscapes, but I stopped on an image of me, asleep. The view must of been from her bedroom window, and I was in awe of the way she drew me. I flipped more page's, taking note of how many of them were filled with me. I turned another page, looking at the beautiful picture.

It was a perfect log cabin, nestled into the woods, the pine trees surrounding stood tall and old. The details in the drawing were incredible, and I immediately thought of back home, in la push. I could almost smell the salt water of first beach.

"When ever I think about...where I want to live, with you. I come back to that picture." Her voice was low, but it still suprised me. I hadn't relized she woke up.

"Its incredible, were is it?" I asked, studying the picture.

"Im not really sure, I just see the house in my head, but it belongs at home. In la push. That's where I imagine it." She shrugged, sitting up slightly.

"Is that where you want to live?"

"Eventually, yes. I know we can't stay there forever, we can't stay anyplace forever. But we'll be safe there for a while. I like the idea, of living there, with you."

She said it so surely, and just like that I wanted it to. A house in the woods, hidden, but close enough to the beach to smell the salt. I wanted to come home to her, have her to myself, have her as my wife. The thought shocked me for one whole second, but it fit in perfectly with everything else. Of course she would be my wife, it wasn't something I had actually thought about but it was natural, just like everything else with her.

"Do you want to get married?" I asked without thinking. Just cause my train of thought went that course, doesn't mean her's did you idiot. Her eyes widened, and she looked shocked.

"N-no. I didn't mean...I mean..you know, someday?" I stumbled, trying to explain.

"I just meant, did you ever think about it?" I try'd again. She laughed then, and I shut my mouth. She leaned forward, pressing her chest to me and lightly kissed me cheek.

"Yes my Jacob, I have thought about it. And I would love nothing more then to be your wife someday." She whispered, her breath trailing over my neck. I felt the warmth of her sink into my bones, leaving my skin sensitive to her touch and my hands itched to feel her.

I dropped the drawing onto the floor, turning my head and catching her lips with my own. I wish I could say I had control over myself, but I didn't. My hands grabbed for her, pulling her over me and ontop. Her small hands twisted into my short hair, her fingernails scraping my scalp and I felt the rumble start in my chest and work its way out, a low grown filling the air.

My hands slid up her back, under her top feeling her smooth skin on mine and I kissed her deeply, my tongue finding its way into her mouth. She sat up slightly, her leg's falling to either side of me and her hands slid slowly down my chest, running over my muscles and sending sparks shooting down my body. I knew I had to rein this in, before I got to lost in her. She pulled her mouth from mine, but immediately leaned down, leaving open mouth kisses down my neck.

Her hot mouth on me wiped my mind blank, and my body took back over. One hand slid down her waist, running over her perfect ass and gripping her thigh. The other followed, but stopped on her ass, massaging gently and she moaned, her mouth still on me and the vibrations shot straight to my cock.

Her mouth paused on the crook of my neck, and she sucked lightly, tugging my skin between her plump lips. I heard a growl bubble up from my chest, escaping and she moaned breathlessly.

Her mouth released me with a soft pop, and she sat up, her hands splayed on my bare skin. She looked beyond sexy, her top riding low, giving me a perfect veiw of her breasts and her curly hair was cascading down her curvy body.

I couldn't keep away from her, and I leaned up, placing a kiss over her heart. Her hand came up, holding me to her and I continued, peppering kisses over her skin, slowly following the slope of her tanktop. I pressed a kiss to the center of her chest, my face nearly burried in her breasts and I was in heaven, between her silky mounds.

My tounge flicked out, tasting her skin and she gripped me tigher. I was loosing my mind, trying to get closer to her and she moaned again, the sound sinking into my core. Both hands gripped her thighs, pulling her up my body and directly over my erection. Her weight settled on me, and the pressure had my head spinning.

Even through the foggy haze of lust I became aware of her stillness. She was frozen, ontop of me, and I mentally kicked myself for being such an idiot. My head snapped up, and my body froze also. Her face was shocked, her eyes wide, and immediately I let my hands fall from there grip on her.

"Shit, I'm sorry Ness." Her face relaxed, her hands coming down to my chest.

 _It's okay, Jacob._

"No it's not. Im sapose to-"

 _I said, its fine Jake. Really. Im not upset, I was just shocked._ She leaned forward, her hands braced on my chest, but she was still on me, her leg's on either side of my hips and the movement was to much, my body arched and a low groan came from my mouth.

Her eyes widened again, and her face broke into a devious smile. _Do you want me to get up?_ I didn't, it was the last thing I wanted her to do, but I closed my eyes, breathing deeply and nodded. I felt her disappointment flow into me, unintentionally I'm sure, before she lifted herself of me and her hands left me.

I kept my eyes closed, taking slow breaths and calming myself. When I looked at her, her face was pink, and her eyes were on my still prominent erection. Maybe basketball shorts aren't the best choice.

I cleared my throat, watching her eyes flash to mine and raised one eyebrow. She blushed deep scarlet.

"See something you like?" I teased her, and the red spread down her neck.

"I was ju-I mean, you-" she studdard, growing flustered and then snapped her mouth close. I laughed, but reached for her, pulling her closer to me and she leaned against my side, facing me.

"I was only kidding baby, calm down."

She smiled alittle sheeplishy, her arm resting across my chest, her hand on my bare skin.

 _I can't help that your so handsome._ I threw my head back laughing, and I felt her amusement at me.

"I think you have it alittle backwards, I can't help it that your so gorgeous. Im sorry if I made you uncomfortable, I should off had better control." She frowned.

 _Jacob, listen, cause I'm not going to repeat myself. You didn't make me uncomfortable, not in the slightest. And you don't need to have control 24/7, belive it or not I can control myself. It's not just you, its us, we make these decisions together. Okay my Jacob?_

Her tone was firm, scolding and I couldn't help but fall alittle more in love with her just then. I leaned forward, trying to put everything into my kiss.

"Okay.." I whisperd, pulling back. She looked like she was concentrating on something, her bottom lip trapped between her teeth.

"What is it baby?" Her eyes landed on me, studying my face.

Can I show you something? She thought hesitantly. I picked up her small hand in my large one, pressing her palm to my cheek, and smiled reassuringly.

The image worked its way into my head, it was me, but from a different view and I realized it was from her eyes. In the little movie I was working my way down her chest, pressing kisses to her skin. She was showing me what just happend, no more then ten minutes ago.

From my eyes her forhead wrinkled, in concentration and then I felt her emotions flow into me. It was like running head long into a wall, if that wall was made of love, passion, and desire. It knocked the breath from my lungs, and I knew if I was standing I would of collapsed.

"I wish I could show you how I feel, I feel all those thing's you do baby." It was true, her emotions matched mine so perfectly, and I wanted to show her I felt the exact same. She smiled, blushing alittle.

"You will one day." And she winked.


	25. Chapter 25: Domesticated

I slowly woke, to the sound of rain hammering on the roof. It's been raining none stop since yesterday morning. I peeked my eyes open, looking up at the dark storm clouds, like one big sheet of grey, no stopping point.

I was thankful for the bad weather, it gave me the perfect excuse to stay inside all weekend with Jake and hide away, I just couldn't handle being in the big house right know.

I slept soundly, since getting to be back with Jake, hadn't had a bad dream once. I felt alot better also, like I had some energy back.

I couldn't understand what had triggerd the bad dreams, they just started that first night. I remember waking up, shaking, in cold sweats, terror coursing through me. I couldn't get the image out of my head. My Jacob, my wolf, dead in the woods, his dark brown eyes lifeless. Day and night the image's stuck, like they were like glued to the back of my eyelids, everytime I closed them I saw him. The only real relief I got was when he was there, and I knew he was alright.

I became more aware of my surroundings, of Jake's arm under my head, and his other wrapped around my stomach, holding me close to him. I loved waking in his arm's again, right were I belonged and I never wanted to sleep without him.

I rolled around, careful not to disturb him but it didn't seem to make a difference, it was like once he knew I was up, he woke to. His hand slid down my hip, his big palm reaching my bare thigh, I had worn one of his larger shirt's to bed, and sliding back up. He pulled me closer, scooting down the bed and buried his face in the fabric of my chest. I stiffled a laugh, stroking his hair, and leaned my cheek on his head.

"Goodmorning my Love." I whispered, my hand sliding down his bare back. His hand slid up my side, around to my back and held me closer.

I ran my fingers up his spin, slowly and back down. I could feel his muscles tighten, his back becoming taut. I laid my palm flat on his shoulder blade, letting my mind open to him. Feeling how much I was in love with him, filling my entire mind, body and soul, and sending the emotions into him. I only really thought of one thing.

 _Kiss me?_

He was still for one second, then raised himself on his free elbow and his lips were on mine. He kissed me fiercely, his hand on the bare skin of my back pulling me as close as he could get. His tongue explored my mouth, and I ached to be closer to him, to feel all of him pressed to me.

He pulled back then, and groaned. His eyes were dark, excited but his face was controlled.

"Do you understand, what that does to me?" He asked, his voice strained. I wasn't sure when he meant, my head was to clouded with lust for him.

"Your hands. I can feel how you feel when I touch you, or kiss you. Your..desire for me." I blushed red then, pulling my hands off him.

"It almost matches my own for you." He shook his head slowly, his hand sliding out from my shirt and taking my palm in his hand, pressing it to his cheek.

"Don't be embarrassed, I love feeling it, its just..to much sometimes."

"To much?" I asked. His hand went back to my thigh, sliding up but stopping on my hip, his big hand covering and his fingers resting on my ass. I kept my hand on his face, his dark eyes holding me. How so?

"Well, I love you, more then anything. You understand that." He said, not asking. Cause he knew I did understand.

"But do you realize how very much I want you? All the time, and I have to control that desire, iv learned to over the past years. It's not easy sometimes, especially when your here like this." His eyes left mine, trailing down my body, my shirt had ridden up from his hand, falling around my waist, exposing my pink panties but I didn't mind, and then trailed back up to my face.

"Now ontop of my own desire, I suddenly feel all of your's, which I have to admit is stronger then I thought it was. To now that you want me, as much as I want you, is torture." He leaned closer, whispering the words near my ear and kissed my neck, my hand slid from his cheek back into his hair, holding him to me.

My body tingled, bringing that ache back to the front of my mind and I felt the desire swarm my body again, taking over. His lips trailed down my skin, hot and delicious, stopping to nip gently on one spot and my body shudderd, arching into him. My breath grew embarrassingly loud, and I concentrated on trying to control my impulse to straddle him and feel him under me again.

He groaned, and I remembered then I was touching him. He pulled back, his breath alittle heavy and his eyes on mine. I didn't move, just waited for him to get control, his eyes slowly relaxed, the lust fading slightly. He smiled gently, leaning down and giving me a soft kiss.

"I need a shower. Ill be right back." He turned around, getting off the bed and going straight into the bathroom. I frowned, but got up and changed, heading into the kitchen to make us breakfast.

I was placing the stack of pancakes on the table, wondering what was taking him so long when I heard the bathroom door open. I pulled out drinks, and the syrup, sitting on the stool and he walked out a moment later. His hair was still damp, his warm scent filling the house. He had on dark jeans, a tshirt hung over his shoulder and a big smile on his face.

He sat down, loading his plate up and started shoving food in his mouth. I couldn't help but laugh.

"I don't feed you enough." I teased, taking two pancakes and smothering syrup on them.

"Gu fen mh nuff." He mummled, around his mouth full and I busted out laughing, wiping tears from my face.

"What?" I gasped around my giggles. He rolled his eyes, swallowing his mouth full and turning towards me.

"I said, you do feed me enough. Beside's, your my girlfriend, not my mom." He kissed my cheek, going back to his food.

His comment stuck in my head. Jacob had lost his mom a long time, before even my mom really knew him. He had to grow up without her, and his dad wasn't exactly young. Billy had to be in his 50's, which wouldn't be so bad if it wasn't for his diabetes and heart problems. Jake should be spending as much time with him as he could, while he could. Why had I never thought of this?

"What's wrong?" He asked, pulling me from my thoughts. I wasn't really sure how to explain where my mind had gone, so I touched his cheek and replayed what I was thinking. He grabbed my hand, pulling it down and holding it tightly.

"I know baby.."

"But Jake, you followed me here cause I had to come. But you didn't, iv been selfish." The emotions swelled in me, and I felt my eyes well up.

"Yes I did, and you know that. I couldn't live without you, it wasn't you being selfish, it was me. Don't worry about this baby, he's not gone, and I don't think he's going anywhere anytime soon." I knew he was trying to make me feel better, but I was still sad.

"Can we visit for Christmas?" He smiled, leaning over and kissed me.

"Of course we can, ill talk to everybody soon and let them know we want to come down." That made me happier, and I started on cleaning up. I was doing the dishes, while Jake was cleaning up the counter.

"Do you think the rain is going to stop for tomorrow?" I asked him.

"I think so, its starting to lighten up. Are you going to go hunting?" I shut off the water, and leaned againts the counter, drying my hands.

"Ya, I think im going to ask dad to come. I think we should talk." He frowned, walking over to me.

"Don't be to hard on him Ness, this is hard for him. Your still his little girl in his mind." I put my arm's around his neck, leaning into him.

"Funny. He use to say something just like that about you." He gave a little smile, and I leaned up, kissing him.

"Now, we need to get this place cleaned up and get the laundry going. I need to get my phone in my room, im sure Ally has blown it up." He stepped back, putting his hand to his forhead in a military salute.

"Yes ma'am." I smacked his chest, and laughed.

"Ill start the laundry and clean the bathroom and bedroom?" He asked, and I nodded. He gave me one more kiss, then turned around and disappeared down the hallway.

I spent the morning cleaning up the kitchen and living room, picking up the cat toys littering the ground, and scooping the cat box. After I pulled on my sweatshirt and made my way to the big house. I was thankfull when I stepped inside that the house was mostly empty, I could hear grandma in the kitchen and grandpa in his study. I made myway up stairs, grabbing a bag from the closet and throwing my charger and phone inside. I grabbed another pair of clothes, adding those and heading into my bathroom, grabbing a couple odds and ends.

There was a tentive knock on my door and I walked back out, placing the bag on my bed.

"Come in." I said, and the door opened. Grandpa's patient face was the first thing I saw. He assessed me, using his doctor expressions and I smiled.

"You can come in grandpa, and I'm alright." He stepped in, immediately going over his mental checklist. His cool hands probed my face and neck, assessing.

"You look much better, do u have your appetite back?" I nodded. "And what about sleeping? Anymore bad dreams?"

"No grandpa, not a single one. I feel alot better, I'm going to be alright." He watched me for another moment, and then took a step back, nodding his head.

"Well I'm glad your feeling better, you look better." He was still formal, and I laughed, stepping towards him and throwing my arms around his neck. He chuckled slightly, but hugged me back.

"Im so relieved your feeling better, you had all of us so worried Renesmee. Your grandmother hasn't stopped making you food all weekend." I stepped back, frowing alittle.

"Im sorry you guy's were so worried, but I'm fine now. I promise." He nodded, patting my cheek gently.

"Alright, well I'll step out then." He turned to the door, but I remembered something then, and what better time, when no body was home but us and grandma.

"Wait, I actually wanted to talk to you about something." I sat on my bed, already trying to fight the blush. He turned around, watching me.

"As your doctor or your grandfather?" Oh man, this was ganna be embarrising.

"My doctor." I confirmed, and just like a switch he was back, calculating and formal.

"Very well, what can I help you with Renesmee?"

"Well, its more like a follow up..you remember we talked about possible looking into my..ah..ability to...reproduce?" I cringed at my myself, already dreading the anwser.

"Yes, I remember. I do have some ideas, and I think it's something we should look into sooner rather then later." He nodded, still formal. It did help alittle, to see him as just my doctor.

"Right, I agree. What type of ideas did u have?"

"Well, most of it would be from my knowledge of reproduction and knowledge of vampire's. Now you being only half and a female I think you would still have the possibility, were it a normal human male. Givin the fact that Jake isn't exactly fully human I'm not sure what would happen. I think we should start with a physical, for both of you. I can talk to one of my female coworker's and have the appointment set up with her if you prefer, and ill have her send the samples to me. I think that would be fairly safe, and make things alittle more comfortable for you?" I was pretty positive I was bright red by now, but I knew it had to be done.

"Yes, please." He nodded once.

"Have Jacob see me soon and I can work out the other details with him. I work tomorrow so ill have something set up for after school sometime this week. A blood test is usually the best way to determine fertility but I'm not sure if that will work in your case." I could see the wheels turning in his head.

"That sounds fine, thank you grandpa." He nodded once, then turned and left. I shook of the last of the red from my face, there was no reason to be embarrassed, I was a grown up, and I had to learn these thing's, to know what was possible. I grabbed my bag, and made my way downstairs, into the kitchen. Grandma was cleaning up the counters, a container on the edge.

"Renesmee darling. How are you?" She asked motherly.

"Im better grandma, thank you. Do you know were everybody is?"

"I belive Rose and Alice are shopping, Emmett and Jasper are hunting and I'm not sure were your parent's are. They haven't been home in a while." I frowned, unhappy. Had I upset them that much?

"Are you hungry? I made some sandwiched to bring over, there right here." She picked up the container, handing it out to me. I took it, trying to smile thankfully.

"Thank you, I'm sure there delicious. Ill see you later." I stepped up to her, giving her a kiss on the cheek and made my way back to Jake's.

I grabbed two plates, taking out some sandwiches and drinks. I went over to the cabinets, picking some chips and added them, and went in search of Jake.

I found him on the floor infront of his dresser, stack's of folded clothes on one side and an empty basket on his other. Directly infront of him was my clothes, clean and folded and in his hands, was my underwear.

"What are you diong?" I laughed. He looked up, startled and his dark skin seemed to flush slightly.

"Trying to figure out why in the world you would want to wear these." They hung from his finger. They were one of my sexier ones, lacy and thonged.

"Are you complaining? Cause I'm pretty sure if you saw them on me you wouldn't be." I knelt down, plucking them from his hand and dropping them on the pile. His eyes glazed slightly, unfocused.

"Come on, grandma made us some food." I grabbed his hand, getting up and leading him into the kitchen. I felt his eyes on me, and my hips swayed, teasing.

We ate are sandwiches, and I helped him put away the clothes. I went to put my stack in my bag, but he grabbed them from my hands, adding them to his draws, my pants with his, my tops in his shirt draw, and my socks, underwear, and bra in the top, with his boxers and socks. He came over then, lifting me in his arm's and kissing me, and making are way into the living room.

I stroked hazel's head on the way past the tree, and she purred contentedly, her tail flicking and Gatsby swatting at it from below. He sat on the couch, flipping on the tv and I wiggled around on his lap, getting comfortable, and laid my head on his chest.

"Did u see your parent's earlier?" He asked me after a while.

"No, they weren't there. It was just grandma and grandpa. Im ganna call them in a little bit." He nodded, and I decided now was probably the best time.

"I talked to grandpa, and he's ganna set up an appointment for me this week for a physical. I decided to, find out what's possible, before we find out the hard way." He was quite at first, thoughtful.

"He said the best way to be accurate would be for both of us to have one, since your not exactly human yourself, are you okay with that?" His hand gently grasped my chin, pulling my face to his.

"Of course I am, and it's probably best, I don't know how much longer I can keep away from you." He grinned and leaned down, kissing me.

After dinner I went in search of my bag, fishing out my cell phone and plugging it in. I powered it on, letting my massages load before I attempted to check them. I had ten massages from Ally, one from Mom, and on from leah.

I scrolled though Ally's messages, feeling bad for neglecting my freind, it was clear she was worried, she knew I wasn't sleeping well. So I sent her a message, hoping it would suffice for know.

 **IM SO SORRY, IM ALRIGHT, IM BETTER THEN ALRIGHT, ILL SEE YOU MONDAY AND EXPLAIN, I DIDN'T HAVE MY PHONE ON ME. -NESS**

I clicked on the message from mom.

 **RENESMEE, YOUR FATHER AND I ARE AT THE COTTAGE IN FORKS. PLEASE LET US KNOW THAT YOU ARE ALRIGHT. WE LOVE YOU. -MOM**

I felt a lump in my throat, had they stayed away because of me? I sat on the bed, tucking my feet under me and hit the call button. It wrang once, then I heard the sound of my mom on the other line.

"Renesmee?" She sounded worried. I wasn't sure what to say.

"Are you okay sweetheart?" She asked.

"Y-Ya..Mom. Im fine." I chocked out, and I heard her realived sigh on the other end. "Im sorry." I said quietly.

"No hunny, you don't have anything to be sorry about. It was your father and I who should of relized what we were diong. How are you feeling?"

"Im fine, I feel alot better."

"That's good, no more bad dreams?"

"No. Not one...mom?"

"Ya sweetie?"

"Did you guys stay away, because of me?" I asked, trying to hold in my tears. I hated thinking they were upset at me. I wished Jake were here, he stepped out to phase, and check in with the pack.

"No baby, of course not. We weren't staying away, we just wanted to give you some privacy."

"I appreciate that...but can you come home?" Just then I heard his footsteps, and the door to the patio on my right opened, he stepped through, his eyes immediately falling to mine.

"Of course we can. We'll be home in the morning, is that alright?" He stepped over to me, sitting on the bed and sliding in behind me. I rested back into him, feeling comforted.

"Ya, that's fine. Can I talk to him?" I heard the phone move, and then my dad's voice.

"Nessie?"

"Hi daddy." I felt relief, at hearing his voice.

"Hey baby." He sounded relieved to. There was a moment of silence.

"When you come home, can we go hunting?"

"Sure hunny, just come get me when your ready."

"Okay...I love you."

"We love you Renesmee. Well see you in the morning." I hung up and Jake wrapped his arm's around me.

"I need a shower." I declared. He chuckled and held me tigher.

"No you don't."

"I do, a nice hot one." I twisted around , and wrapped my arms around his neck.

"Wanna join me?" I grinned. His eyes narrowed, threateningly.

"And what if I say yes?" He challenged. I grinned bigger, climbing off the bed and holding my hand out for him

"Then I say let's go." I challenged back. He starred me down for another minute, and slid of the bed, taking my hand. Shocked, I stood frozen for a second then turned, walking towards the bathroom. It wasn't exactly a bluff, but I didn't expect him to agree.

I passed the door and his hand slid out of mine, I turned in time to see the door close between us and his laugh sounded on the opposite side. I pouted, but gave up, turning on the shower and stripped, tossing my clothes in his hamper. I had put my toiletries in here earlier so I had my shampoo, conditioner and bodywash.

I showerd and got out, wrapping a towel around my body, and decided it was time for a little revenge for tricking me into the bathroom. I secured my towel but made sure it was low on my chest, exposing a good amount of cleavage, and pulled open the door.

He was in bed, shirtless with the blanket around his waist. He watched me step out, and his eyebrow raised in question.

"Since you so rudely tricked me into the bathroom, I didn't get to grab any clothes." I walked over to his dresser, turning my back on him and pulling the top draw open and grabbing a pair of black boyshort panties. I opened the next one, and picked a black tshirt, setting them ontop.

I could feel his eyes on me, knew he was watching me. I smirked and trying to ignore the butterflies, I pulled the towel, letting it drop to the floor. I heard his gasp, and I slid on my panties, reaching for his shirt and pulling it over my head. I tugged my hair out of the collor, and bent down, grabbing the towel and wringing out my hair.

I walked back to the bathroom, hanging up the damp towel and grabbing my brush. When I came out his eyes were still on me. I sat infront of him, and he reached out for my brush, gently pulling it through my hair. He put it on the bedside table, and wrapped his arm's around me, moving backward and pulling me with him.

"That was very mean." He said, his voice deep and gravelly. I grinned, turning on my back to look up at him.

"So was teasing me. If you can't take it, don't dish it." I stuck my tongue out at him. He growled at me, the sound coming from deep in his chest. His hand slid under my shirt, up to my stomach and carressed it. He leaned down, kissing my neck once and whispered.

"Have I ever told you, that you have a fantastic ass?" I laughed loudly, he chuckled, kissing up my face and catching my lips with his.


	26. Chapter 26: Apologies

A/N: Hello my darling's. I feel the need to apologize for taking so long with this chapter, it was just one of those that seemed to fight me at every turn, it did not come natural, but I'm pleased enought to finally post it. I will say tho that I have a very...yummy treat for ya'll coming up soon. Stay tooned. and as always leave your reviews! They help this story along so much and always make my days!

* * *

When I woke up the next morning the bed was empty. I looked around, finding him at his desk on his labtop. From what I could see it looked like he was watching a lecture.

I yawned, rolling onto my back and stretching, my arm's over my head and closed my eyes, melting back into the bed. I heard the wheels on the chair move, and the bed sagged. When I opened my eyes he was above me, on all fours, his face inches away from mine. I grinned, wrapping my arm's around his neck and pulling down, till his lips landed on mine.

He kissed me back at first, but held himself far away from me. Already defeated I let him go, and he sat up, a smirk on his perfect face. I pouted.

"Your dad's waiting for you." He said, as explanation. I rememberd then I was suppose to go hunting with him and sat up, already climbing out of bed. I changed in the bathroom, deciding not to push that button at the moment, and walked out.

I pulled my hair back, into a ponytail and pulled on my sweater. When I looked over towards him he was already watching me.

"What?" I asked, self conscious. He just continued looking at me.

"Do I have anything on my neck I should know about?" I asked, walking closer to him. I planted myself in between his leg's, my hands on his broad shoulders and his hands settled on my hips.

"No, there's nothing there." He frowned, pulling me closer.

"Then why are you staring?" I said, exasperate. He just smiled, his hands sliding to my lower back.

"I can't help it, your beautiful." He grinned. My cheeks flushed, and I leaned down, pressing my lips to his. My hands slid into his silky hair, holding him to me.

 _I love you_. I thought, sending it to him.

His lips grew alittle more insistent, demanding and I knew it was in reaction to my words. I made myself pull away, resting my forehead on his.

"I have to go." I whisperd. He nodded, and his large hands cupped my face, pulling me back and kissing me softly, his lips tender.

"Be careful out there, and be nice to your dad." He kissed me once more, his eyes on mine.

"I love you, Renesmee." He whispered, the emotions swimming on his face and I felt my heart expand, overflowing. I don't know how I kept falling deeper and deeper in love with him, but I did, everyday.

"Jacob." I choked out, around the lump in my throat, cause I didn't have any other response. His hands fell to my hips, squeezing me once and then pushed me back slighlty. I knew I had to go, and took one more look at him before I turned and left.

I walked outside, seeing mom and dad waiting by the back door. My emotions still running high, I couldn't help but feel guilty for the fight and I ran over to them, throwing my arm's around dad's neck and hugging him tightly. His stone arms circled my back, and I felt mom kiss my head.

When I stepped back they were both smiling, and mom claimed me, hugging me and stroking my hair.

"Are you ready?" Dad asked, after she released me. I nodded, trying to gather my scattered emotions, and looked towards mom.

"Are you coming?"

"No, Esme want's my help with a project. Ill see you after tho?" I gave her a smile, and she took my hand, squeezing gently. Dad took her other, leaning over and kissing her. It amazed me how even after 9 years they still hated to be apart, they never tired of each other's company, and you could see clear as day there as in love as the day I was born. I knew that connection was permanent, and I also knew I have forver to look forward to that with Jacob.

She gave him one last meaningful look, and released me, walking back into the house. He chuckled once, and held his arm out wide.

"Shall we?" He bowed slightly, and laughing, I led the way into the forest. We walked, side by side, throught the thick vegetation, passing the gates and making are way into the national forest.

"How has your weekend been?" He asked conversationally after a while. I played through my day's over my head, carefully clouding over certain moments with Jake. _Really nice, I slept alot._

"And the nightmares are gone?" He asked, his brow wrinkling.

 _Yes, I haven't had any since.._ my mind went back to that night, the memory playing over.

 _Daddy, I'm sorry for yelling at you._ He shook his head, and reached out, grabbing my hand.

"Renesmee, your mother was right, no body can tell you what you can and can't do. I had no right to try sweatheart, and I'm sorry I did. I know that you and Jacob are..adult's, and can make your own decisions... Its just hard baby, just a few years ago I could hold you in my arm's and protect you...but I know, that it's Jacob's turn, and ill try harder to respect that.." he smiled alittle sadly, looking down. I squeezed his hand, and leaned forward, wrapping my arms around his waist.

"Daddy, I understand how hard this must be. But I promise im not ganna just up and leave, you and mama and everybody are my family, just as much as Jake. I love you all, and I will always need you, no matter how old I am." He held me close, rubbing my back soothingly.

"Just promise me...that you guys, are being..s-safe." He nearly choked out, and I pulled away, my face blushing. I definitely didn't want this conversation with him.

"Daddy were really n-" he held his hand out, stopping me.

"Its not my business, frankly I really don't want to know anything about it, but it's my responsibility as your father, so just promise me that..when, you will be safe." He avoided my eyes, and I prayed this would be the end of it.

"I promise." I said.

"And...I never, ever, want to hear it." He said quickly, visibly cringing.

 _Oh god, can we stop please._ I mentally begged. He nodded, and started walking again.

We headed into the woods, following the scents of are warm bloodied prey. I took down two deer, feeling the blood course through me and I felt stronger, more energetic almost instantly. I knew Jacob was right, I had to pay attention to my vampire side and not neglect it.

"Jacob's right, maybe if you hunted more you wouldn't of felt so sick." He said observationly. I shook my head, already knowing the awnser to this one.

"That's not it, it was him, we all know it." He looked thoughtful, walking back towards the house.

"Do you think there's anything behind it..?" I asked him, aftaid of the awnser.

"I don't think so sweetheart, your mother use to have bad dreams all the time when I wasn't there with her. It's just the mind's unconscious way of worrying when you miss someone." I hoped that was all, and it was just my stupid head, being dramatic. We made are way back, walking into the backyard.

"Thank you daddy." He slid one arm around me, and kissed my forehead.

"Your welcome baby." And then left, heading into the big house.

I made my way to Jacob's, opening the front door and listening but I didn't hear anything. I glanced around, and taking notice of a folded piece of paper on the counter. I walked over to it, picking it up and unfolding.

 _ **Renesmee-**_

 _ **Went to run some errands, ill bring dinner home. If u need me call. I love you.**_

My heart fluttered, feeling the shwoosh of butterflies in my stomach. I hoped I'd never loose this feeling, no matter how long we were together.

I took his note, making my way into the bedroom and placing it on the nightstand. I decided to shower in his absence, washing the dirt and grim from my hunting trip. I got out, dressing in some comfy sweatpants and a tshirt.

I decided to go to my room and make sure I had all my school things together, and maybe hangout there for a while.

It was almost six when he texted me that he was on his way home, I grabbed my uniform and backpack, going back to his place and dropping them off in his room. About ten minutes later I heard his car racing down the long path, and come to a stop out front.

I was on the couch, hazel curled up in my lap contentedly when I heard his footsteps approach, and the door to my left swung open. He walked in with his arms full, one carrying grocerie bags, the other containing what I can only assume from the smell as chinese food. The thought alone had my mouth practically watering. He dropped them on the counter, turning around to me.

He looked so handsome, in his jeans and leather jacket, a black tshirt peeking from underneath. I wanted to feel his arms around me, his hands on me, I wanted to be in his arms. He grinned, taking a couple steps forward and gently picking up the sleeping cat, laying her on the other end of the sofa. Gatsby seemed to like idea of a nap to, cause he jumped up, curling into her and his loud purrs resonated through the room.

He took my hands, pulling gently up till I stood, and just like I had been thinking, he engulfed me in his hot strong embrace. I melted into him, my arms winding around his neck and pressing firmly against him. I buried my face against his neck, kissing it softly. His arms tightened around me, holding me closer.

"I missed you today." He whispered. I let my connection open, letting him feel just how much I had missed him. He held me still, for a couple more moments and then stepped back, his hands not leaving me.

"Are you hungry? I brought us chinese." He grinned, it was on of his favorite take outs.

I nodded, realizing just how hungry I was. He pulled me over to the island, taking out the food and putting away the few groceries. A couple minutes into dinner I heard the distinct sound of my parents walking into the forest. I felt alittle bad that they left so much, but I knew it was better for all of us this way. I didn't have to hear anything by mistake, and dad didn't have to listen to are thoughts.

He must of noticed it to, cause he looked up suddenly, and smirked devilishly. My face heated up, for reasons I couldn't even comprehend.

"So what did you do today?" I asked, steering any conversation away from my blush.

"I went to school this morning to drop of some paperwork, iv been thinking about trying to finish early, and I wanted to know what I still needed. After that I stopped in at the hospital, talked to Carlisle about, what he talked about yesterday." He had an odd expression on his face, almost embarrassed.

"Really?" He flashed me a Jacob smile.

"About which one?" I laughed alittle.

"Both I guess." He nodded, pushing his empty plate away and turning towards me.

"Ya, I just don't think I want to take a whole nother year, I'm actually ahead on credits so it wouldn't take that much more work. If I can add two more classes to the second semester then I can graduate this spring."

"Doesn't the second semester start right after Christmas?"

"Ya, if I can pick them before then ill be fine." I thought about it, it would be nice for both of us to graduate this year. I knew for the time being I didn't want to go to college yet. I would go soon, maybe in a year or two, but for know I wasn't sure what I wanted to do after school.

"And the other thing, I want to be ready for whenever we decide to, I will be prepared, so we don't have to make any premature decisions." He smiled, taking my hand.

"What did he say? If you don't mind me asking?" He shook his head slightly, but his russet skin looked alittle pink tinged under his cheek.

"Honestly I didn't get most of it, he got alittle to technical, but I think he wanted to do a test and see how...strong they are?" He said, looking alittle uncomfortable. I thought over his words, trying to come to some conclusion.

"Huh?" I said, baffled. He smirked.

"Your so innocent sometimes." He winked.

"Me, Nessie. My..stuff." He waited, watching me. "Oh gezz, my sperm? You know?" He said, exasperated. It clicked then, and my face flushed to resemble a tomato.

"Ohh.." My mouth was left hanging open slightly, cause I still didn't understand something.

"But how?" His eyes flahed to mine, and I saw them rake over my body briefly.

"Well..he needed a..sample." he looked down, away from me. I thought about that. Thankfully, I knew what that one meant, but he looked so uncomfortable I couldn't torture him more.

"Okay. Thank you for going so soon. Are you done?" I stood up, collecting the dishes. He nodded, handing his plate over and I added them to the sink.

He stood up, taking my hand and pulling me away from the dishes. He towed me through the room, into the bedroom and scooped me into his arm's. I laughed as he walked over to the bed, and hazardly tossed me in the middle, the spring jostling me. I watched as he kicked of his shoes, shedding his jacket, and reached behind his head, pulling his tshirt off. I watched as the muscles in his biceps flexed, his abdomen crunching at the movement.

The sight of him flooded me with desire, and he fell foward, his hands catching him before he landed on me. He gave me a sexy smirk, before leaning down and capturing my lips with his. My hands shot to his bare skin, one moving up into his silky hair and holding him close, the other sliding down his hot chest, feeling every muscle and tenden under his skin.

His mouth parted, his tongue running over my lip and I let him in, letting him explore my mouth. I clung to him, wanting to be closer, his hand slid under the hem of my top, following my waist and curving, resting on my back, and pulling my body to his, his chest flushed with mine. My heart beated loudly, my pulse hammering in my ears. My head swam, filling with the intoxicating scent of him and I started to lose my control. My leg wiggled out from underneath him, wrapping carelessly around his waist and pulling myself closer. I felt his hard length against my thigh for just one second, before he pulled away, gathering my wrists in his one big palm and holding them above my head on the comforter.

My chest heaved, taking big gulps of air as I tried to refrain from struggling in his grip. My eyes found his, and they were excited, his normally dark brown eyes nearly black and his nostrils seemed to flare, breathing in deeply. I could see the battle in his face, his desire and want, waring with his gentleman nature and his need for privacy.

I gave him a gentle smile, calming my body and heart, and not pushing him anymore. He kissed me once before pushing himself off the bed, and disappearing into the bathroom. I changed for bed, deciding to keep my sweatpants on and keep myself from temptations.

Of course that thought flew out the window when he walked back out, wearing only his boxers and a very sexy grin. I made a mental note to get him completely alone, very soon.


	27. Chapter 27: Appointment

A/N: Hello Darlings! Enjoy!

* * *

On monday Ally was waiting to ambush me and wanted to know every detail about what happend over the weekend, I told her just about everything, leaving out the supernatural. It was always hard for me to edit or leave out thing's from her, of course I knew it was necessary.

The week's following up to christmas break were for the most part uninteresting. Only a couple seemed to stick out of importance. The following week after talking with grandpa I had an appointment with Dr Chelsea Hartman, a gynecologist at the top of her field. She was to do the exam but send all information to grandpa.

I was alittle uncomfortable thinking about my upcoming physical, not knowing what to really expect. I asked mom but she had never had to gone before she was changed, So she didn't know.

When I told Ally she said that after Brad she went and it wasn't bad, she told me a couple thing's to expect, and it did help me alittle. On wensday after school, I went home to change and Jacob drove us to the doctor's office. Grandpa met us inside, showing me to the waiting area and then headed in a different direction with Jake. I waited till my name got called, then followed the nurse into a room.

"You can change into the gown and the doctor will be with you in a moment."

She smiled politely, and closed the door behind her. I changed quickly, sitting on the paper coverd bed and waited anxiously. A few moments later a knock sounded, and then a woman stepped in the room, wearing a white medical jacket. She looked to be about mid 40's, with strong Hispanic features and honey colored hair. She looked nice, and walked forward, taking a seat a couple feet from me.

She introduced herself, and her freindly nature had me feeling much more relaxed. She went over the procedures, making sure I understood everything and asking if I had any questions. When I told her no she started asking me about my health and history. I was relatively vague, saying that Carlisle had my notes and she seemed to recall that she was just diong the exam.

When she had me lay out on the table some of my nerves returned, then as she lifted my gown she casually asked if I was sexually active. My face flamed red, and I was thankful she wasn't looking at it.

"N-no.." I studderd.

"Your father tells me you have a boyfreind tho?" She asked. I tried to concentrate on her words, and not what she was diong.

"Yes, I do. His name is Jacob, he's.." I didn't have the right word for him.

"And do you guys talk about the physical aspect of your relationship?"

"..yes, we do. We've just decided to wait for the time being.."

She sat up, capping a little vile and pulled of her gloves.

"Well, I must say, its very refreshing to hear someone so mature for her age. Your father must be proud." Of course she was referring to Carlisle, and she didn't know my real age, but I smiled politely anyways.

"I'll step out and you can change."

After I dressed she told me she would bring her work to Carlisle and led me out a door, into the same waiting area as before. Jacob was leaning againts a wall, his hands deep in his pockets and a look of deep thought on his face. He looked up, quickly finding me and stepped forward. The doctor left, leaving me alone with him. He glanced around, taking note of the relatively empty space and kissed me.

"Are you ready to go?" He asked, and I nodded, ready to get out, the sterile environment making me uncomfortable.

He led me outside, holding the door open for me and pulling out of the parking lot. He reached over, taking my hand and resting them on my thigh.

"How are you?" He asked, I knew he was curious, but wanted to respect my space.

"Im fine, it really wasn't that bad. The doctor was very nice, said I was very mature for my age." I winked at him, and he cracked a smile.

"At least your exam was with someone else, mine was with your grandfather." He gave me a disturbed face, his eyes widened and I couldn't help but laughing out loud, the image popping into my head and I laughed harder.

He grinned at me, amused by my enjoyment.

On friday that same week we were eating dinner in the big house, everybody converging to the kitchen, scattered here and there with there significant others. Jacob collected the dishes, bringing them to the sink and grandma gently pushed him out of the way, tutting reprochfully at him. He grinned, and sat back down to me. I turned to face the stools on the other side of him, where my parent's sat.

"Mom, Dad. We wanted to run something by you." Jake gave me a quizzical look, clearly drawing a blank about what I was referring to. Dad looked anoyyed, and I knew it was because mom was shielding are minds, like she had promised.

"We do?" He leaned over and whispered. Mom's windchime laugh sounded from the other side, and I heard Emmett chuckle behind us. I took his hand, letting my thoughts flow into him.

 _Christmas?_

Recognition dawned on his face and he nodded. He squared his shoulder's slightly, like he was getting ready for a battle. I giggled, watching him.

 _I got this one handsome._ He looked a little relieved, slouching back down.

"What is this about Renesmee?" Mom asked, resting her hand on dad's shoulder.

"Well..we were talking the other day, and Christmas break is coming up soon, and I think Jacob should get to visit his family. So, if it's okay with you guy's, we wanted to visit forks." I said, I didn't really want to ask permission, but I didn't want to be rude also. They were quiet, thinking and I'm sure dad was reading mom's thoughts.

"Break starts on the 22st, and we would leave here on the 26, so we would be having Christmas with everybody here. Then we would stay there for the week, and come on the 31st, and be here for new years.." I waited, they were still quiet, and I started to panic.

"Jacob really doesn't get to see his dad or family enough, its not fair for him." I added, hoping for some type of responce. Nothing.

"Your not really going to say yes are you" Rosalie said in astonishment. She was looking at mom and dad, annoyance showing all over her face.

"Rose." Esme said in reprimand.

"Oh come on, he's just going to take her away and deflower her!" She exclaimed.

"Rosalie!" Carlisle raised his voice, a firm tone in it. Emmett being him busted out laughing.

"Emmett this is not funny!" Esme demanded. Alice watched, her head going back and forth and Jasper looked slightly pained, probably from reading all the different emotions in the room.

I was shocked by her response, of course her and Jacob didn't always get along, they fought like cats and dogs, like brother and sister but I knew rose still cared.

"Fine, but I was just saying what everybody was thinking." She said haughtily, folding her arm's and turning her nose in the air. Jacob turned around, glaring at her, his hands shaking slightly.

"I am not! And not that it's any of your dam buisness but it was her idea, bloodsucker." I took his hand again, sending him calming thoughts and trying to relax him.

 _Don't let her get to you my Jacob, its okay. Relax. I love you._ He did relax alittle, turning back around.

"Does anybody else have any comment about my life?" I said, making it clear I really didn't care what they thought.

"No? good." I said, turning back to my parents. "Mom? Dad?" I asked, waiting. They looked at eachother, for just a moment then look back towards us.

"Its okay with your father and I, so long as you keep in touch." She smiled, and dad nodded, not looking quite as content as mom but not upset. I heard rose get up, stalking away and Emmett followed her. I got up, hugging them both.

"Thank you, I really appreciate it."

"We" Jacob said, amending my statement. I stepped back and leaned againts his side, his arm wrapped around me, his hand resting on my hip.

Everybody else wandered out, going about there buisness and we got up, saying goodnight and making are way back, the same time mom and dad left, heading into woods. I walked into the bedroom, kicking of my shoes.

"I can't believe they said yes like that, no fighting." He said, alittle disbelieving.

When I turned around he was kicking his own shoes off, and tossing his jacket onto the computer chair. I watched him as he tugged off his shirt, his broad muscled chest on view and suddenly it was all I could think about.

"I know, its nice to be treated as an adult." I said, and reached for the hem of sweatshirt, pulling it up and over my head.

It landed on the chair next to his jacket, and I felt his warm hand suddenly on my bare stomach. My tank top had ridden up slightly, and his bare skin on mine had my heart racing faster. I looked up, noticing how close he was, his eyes were on me, roving my body. His hand slid up my stomach slightly, his fingers wide. He leaned down, his face hovering inches above mine.

"So I get you all alone to myself, for a whole week." He had a devilish smirk on his lips, and his eyes burned into mine.

"Not all alone, Billy still lives there." I said, wrapping my arms around his neck and pulling myself close to him, my palm on the back of his neck.

 _But atleast he sleeps._ He grinned, and kissed me hard, his other hand finding my bare back and pulling me closer to him, my stomach almost flushed with his own and the skin on skin contact gave me goosebumps. I wanted to feel more of him, more of his hot skin on my own.

I stepped back a tiny bit, releasing him from my grip and watching his face I reached for the hem of my tanktop, already bunched around my waist from his hands. His eyes bored into mine, waiting, for what, I wasn't sure but he didn't stop me, so I pulled it up, over my head and it landed on the floor.

I stood in a pearl white bra and my jean's, my face blushing pink. His gaze traveled down, over my torso and he surged forward, his hands gripping my thighs and he lifted me up. I wrapped my legs around his waist, and my arms around his neck, securing myself to him and his lips claimed mine, almost possessive. His hands ran over me, down gripping my ass, back up and running over my bare skin.

His tongue tangled with my own, and his earthy scent was filling my head, intoxicating. I broke free, inhaling gulps of air, my heart hammerd noisily in my chest. His lips didn't leave me tho, just took a new path, starting under my jaw and slowly down my neck. My skin tingled under his lips, electricity flowing between us.

His hands slid down, cupping me firmly and lifted me higher on his body. His lips decended, over my collorbone and across my shoulder. My body shudderd against him, his hands and lips overruling my control. My mind was blank, filling only with swirling emotions.

I felt the air shift around me, felt his slight movement as he walked and then sat down on the bed. He placed me down, sitting across his thighs and I straddled him. His hands slowly slid back up my body, across my hips, squeezing once and up my waist, till they rested on my ribs, spread open, his thumbs just under my bra.

His lips trailed lower, following my strap down my chest. They left a hypersensitive trail, almost scorching, that peirced my skin and shot right to my desire for him, amplifying it. I felt like jelly, hopeless in his arms, willing.

His lips followed the curve of my bra across my breast, trailing his perfect hot kisses lower, till he reached the center, and up following the other side. I wrapped my arms firmly around his shoulders, pressing my palm to the back of his neck and letting my emotions flow into him.

His body seemed to harden, and his face lifted to meet mine, his eyes were dark pools of desire and I crushed myself to him, his lips immediately responded to my own, his body falling back onto the bed with me on him. My mind was fuzzy, unfocused and all I could think about was his skin on mine, I wanted more.

I kissed him desperately, needing more of him, needed something. His lips matched my own desperate need, his hands following suite and running over any part of me he can reach. It wasn't until I felt the band of my bra slacken that my mind seemed to clear.

This was dangerous territory, we weren't exactly alone, I'm sure my family could still hear us if they tried, and if we continued like this we would know doubt have to stop anyways. My frozen body must of been enough to trigger his own brain, cause I felt him pull away then, his eyes wide, I'm sure with suprise from himself.

My heart still beat furiously, and I laid my head down near his on the pillow, in the crook of his neck, and I kissed him once.

 _Sorry, I got alittle carried away_. I thought, listening to my heart slowdown to a normal for me pace. I felt him shake his head, his hands resting on my back.

"It wasn't just you baby.." he whispered. We were quiet for a couple more moments. Then I felt his hands slid back up, and the band tightened again, resecured.

"Im..ganna go shower." He said, his voice alittle off. I sat up, swinging my self off him, and he made straight for the bathroom.

I got up and changed, pulling on PJ pants and a tshirt, and crawled into bed, exhausted, I felt asleep almost right away. I vaguely heard him come out, and then the sound of a draw being closed. I felt the bed dip, and his warm arms secure around me, pulling me back into him. He buried his face in my hair, and pressed himself closer to me.

"I love you, Renesmee." He whisperd. Groggy, I didn't think I could manage to talk, so I found his hand, letting my thoughts into his head.

 _I love you more my Jacob._ And succumbed to sleep again.

The following week on Monday grandpa called me up to his office, explaining that one of the comman test was a blood test. We had no luck with needles in the past, so the only way we had to do was to bite myself. He told me we didn't have to, that he could try some other things, but I didn't really mind, it would heel pretty fast and it was necessary.

So I cut a tiny spot on my wrist, and grandpa took a vile of blood. When I went to Jake's he asked what happend and I told him, explaining what grandpa said.

Jake called Billy with are news, and he was thrilled that we were coming to visit, started talking about Charlie and Sue and Rachel and I could see how utterly happy it made Jake to know his dad was so excited. They talked for a while about are visit, about what we would do and Jake told him we were sharing his old room. He didn't seem to have any problems about it, just laughed and said not to tell Charlie.

On friday grandpa told us to meet him in his office at the hospital. I was instantly nervous, either way after today we would know. The car ride their was quiet, we were both in are heads today. We pulled up, and parked. I felt his hand take mine, and when I look up at him he was watching me.

"Ness baby, you know no matter what doc says that it doesn't matter to me. I love you, now and always." His words did make me feel better, I knew he was right, it would always be us. Besides, I wasn't even sure if it was something I wanted or not.

"I know Jake. Thank you." I gripped his hand, and gave him a thankful smile. We got out, making are way in and up to Grandpas office.

Before we could knock he had the door open, ushering us inside and closed the door behind us. We sat in the chairs infront of his desk, and he sat behind it.


	28. Chapter 28: Results

A/N : Atlast! I feel bad that this one took so long, iv had so many ideas floating around my head that it was hard to sit down and write just one part. But on the good news i have the next few chapters planned out and started! Enjoy and as always leave your Reviews! Its always nice to hear what the readers think. Good or bad!

* * *

Before we could knock he had the door open, ushering us inside and closed the door behind us. We sat in the chairs infront of his desk, and he sat behind it.

"Renesmee, Jacob. Firstly I want to say how proud I am of you both, for being so mature regarding this topic. I'm glad you want to learn what your capable of. After your mom and dad I think we can agree not to assume anything." He had his medical face on, calculating. My stomach felt like it was in knots, nervous tangled knots. Would what ever he say affect us? If we couldn't, would are future together be limited. But if we could..I knew I wasn't ready, let alone if I wanted that. And it wasn't that I couldn't see loving something that was part of Jacob, I knew I could. But the danger's that decision could encounter, seemed to risky.

"Looking separately at both your results...I see no reason's why you wouldn't be capable of conceiving. On the contrary, I think you two have a greater chance then normal humans. It seems that the imprint connection you share goes beyond even my understanding." I let that sink in, it seemed to slowly trickle through my brain. It was possible. It was probable infact.

"Now that leads to the question of contraception...I don't think any form of hormonal birth control would work with you Renesmee, it simple wouldn't affect your system the way it's supposed to. I think the safest route for you both would be condoms." My brain felt a little slow, and I just nodded.

"Do either of you have any questions?" I wracked my brain, but just came up blank.

"No, not right now. Thanks Doc, we really appreciate it." Jake said, taking the lead.

"Of course, and if at any point you do have one don't hesitate to ask." He said seriously, getting up and walking around the desk, he clasped Jacob's shoulder, and smiled at me. I tried to smile back.

"Thank you Grandpa."

"There's no need Ness, you know that." He said, his doctor mask falling away to his grandfatherly love. Jacob stood, reaching for my hand and we said are goodbyes and left.

I registered the purr of the engine, driving through the town, and then a bowl of spaghetti being placed infornt of me. I looked around, not really paying attention and was suprised to see Jake at the oven in his place, making himself a bowl, with a worried expression on his face. How had the day passed so quick?

"Thank you." I told him, starting on my food and I relized I was starving. He walked over, placing his bowl down and grabbing two drinks from the fridge, putting them down also and joined me.

We ate in relative silence, till we were done, and I took the bowl to the sink, putting water in them and turned around to face him. He still had a worried look, but was watching me. He got up, walking around the island and over to me. I stepped up to him, wrapping my arms around his neck.

"That was delicious. Thank you very much." I smiled at him. He frowned.

"What's wrong?" I asked.

"Im just..you've been in your head all afternoon..I'm worried." He said gently, folding his arms around me.

"I know, I'm sorry..come here." I took his hand, pulling him over to the couch and sitting down, facing him.

"Im sorry, it was just alot to take in. Iv never really thought about it that much till recently. I didn't think it was something that was possible, then to hear that it's not only possible, but likely if were not careful. It just made me think." He listened to my words, letting me speak then stayed quiet after. Finally a couple minutes later he reached over, grabbing my waist and pulling me onto his lap, curled against his chest.

"I get it, it seems like suddenly there's this big open door right infront of us, and I always tried not to dwell on the what ifs, but know..." he trailed off, his hold on me tightening unconsciously. I nodded, laying my head on him and my hand around his neck, stroking his hair.

Trying to put aside the whole conceiving aspect I tried to think about that else this meant for us. Now that we knew he didn't have an excuse for us not to be intimate..well other then my family. We would just have to be smart first and get protection. Condoms? I wrinkled my nose, thinking about it. He shifted, leaning back and looking down at me.

"What was that?" He asked.

"What was what?" I said, I hadn't said anything.

"I don't know, I was getting glimpses of your thoughts and all I understood was annoyance at something?" And like a light switch my face reddened, the blush creeping all the way down my neck. I looked away quickly, but I knew he had seen it.

"N-nothing." I cursed myself for my nervous stutter.

"No there was definitely something, you were thinking about us and then something annoyed you." He insisted, grabbing hold of my hand before I could pull it away.

"I..I wasn't thinking anything in particular.." I said, avoiding his searching gaze.

"Renesmee, I know your lying, and your redder then your tesla. Spill."

I folded my arm's difiently over my chest and locked my lips. He waited for a minute, then leaned forward pressing a tender kiss to my cheek. I ignored him. His arms cirled me, pulling me closer to his chest and he continued peppering small kisses to the side of my face. I felt my will crumbling, I wanted to succumb to him, but my embarrassment was to great. His hand brushed my neck, sweeping my long curls to the side and pressed a kiss to the tender skin behind my ear.

"Please tell me?" He whisperd, his voice low and husky. It sent shivers down my spin. He trailed his lips up, back towards my cheek and his hand gently grasp my chin, turning it to face him. His dark eyes caught mine, and I was putty in his arms. His bottom lip stuck out slightly, in an adorable pout.

"Please?" My mind seemed to forget what I was embarrassed about, and I just wanted to give that face everything in the world.

"Condoms." I blurted out without thinking, and again my face flamed. Had I really just done that?

His face went blank for a split second, then seemed to settle on utter confusion.

"What?" He asked. I could practically see the wheel's turning in his head, trying to figure me out. I thought about a way to explain my meaning, but nothing seemed to fit. He picked up my hand, pressing it to his warm cheek and gave me a hopeful expression.

 _What I meant was..I don't want to..use them_.. His face was confused, and alittle shocked _. I mean I know we have to, of course we do.._ I rushed on, trying to explain better.. _.I guess I just don't like the idea of them..of something inbetween us..I dont know, forget it, I make no sense._

I tried to pull back my hand away, confused even by my own explanation. It had made sense at first in my head, but did it really when I tried to explain it?

His eyes searched mine tho, and he didn't look confused, he seemed like he was thinking about something. Finally his hand cradled my face and he leaned in, kissing me once very sweetly.

"I understand perfectly what you mean." He sounded so sincere any embarrassment left over vanished, replaced with love for this incredible understanding man.

I kissed him with everything I had, my arms around his neck holding me to his hot body. He kissed me back enthusiastically, his hands running along me and his tongue tangled with my own.

For many minutes I was lost in the feel of him. It wasn't until his hands slid to my waist, pushing up, that I seemed to come back to earth slightly. I broke free, pulling back to figure out what he wanted. I leaned back, and he slid forward to the edge of the couch, grabbing hold of me and stood. I wrapped my arm's around his neck, and he somehow managed to hold me up and slid both of my leg's around his waist.

In seconds his lips were back on mine and I could feel his strong leg's glid across the room, down the hall. I felt him sit, and the soft bed under my knee's. He leaned back, laying on the dark blue comforter and his eyes shined up at me, inviting and alluring. His hands rested on my waist, over my tshirt.

Looking at him beneath me, just watching me, sent excited shivers down my spin. My eyes seemed to be locked on his, like some silent battle. I worked one hand up his stomach, under his shirt and opened my palm to his skin.

 _Sit up._

He listened, sitting up to meet me and my other hand joined, both sliding up his abs, taking his shirt with them till they were on his chest. He raised his arms, and I pulled it completely off, tossing it somewhere behind me.

He leaned back again, this time taking me with him against his chest, his hands sliding under my shirt and up my back, caressing my skin so gently. His lips met mine in the middle, somehow more insistent then before.

It always amazed me how gentle he was, how his big hands were always soft on my skin. For a man that was 6 feet 7 inches tall, and wrapped in muscles from head to foot, he was nothing more then careful with me.

His hands slid down my back, around to my side's and grabbed the hem of my tshirt. His lips left mine, and his eyes asked for permission. I nodded, sitting up alittle and rasing my arms. He slid it up smoothly, his palms ghosting against my skin and it landed on the floor with a soft thud.

His eyes roamed over me, taking in my black bra, and down, where my jeans started. His hands landed on my waist, pulling me back against his chest. Electricity seemed to flow through my whole body when my skin met his, tingling down to my toes and I craved more of him. His lips met mine again, his hands running over my bare skin.

He kissed me for a long time, but I could tell he was in control, his hands staying in known territory and his lips careful on mine. At one point he leaned back, his eyes watching me, and he kissed my forehead sweetly.

"We should probably get some sleep." I accepted his comment, lifting myself off him and crawling off the bed. He sat up also, watching me.

I walked over to the dresser, picking out one of his large black wife beaters and claiming it. I turned around, putting it on the bed beside him. I glanced up, and his eyes were watching me intently, waiting. I reached for my jeans, intending on pulling them off, but his hands shot out, hooking around the loops and he pulled me closer.

His eyes held mine, asking again and anoyyed I rolled my eyes and nodded. He always asked, and as much as I loved him for it, sometimes I just wanted him to act without thinking.

His hands glided across to my front, releasing the button and I felt the material lossen slightly. They slid back to my side's, his finger tips dipping into the waist band, and slowly dragging down my skin, his hands trailing along me the whole time. I briefly wished I had been wearing something alittle sexier then black cotton undies, but I ignored it as the material slid down my thighs, and pooled around my ankles.

My hands fell to his broad shoulders, steadying myself as I stepped out of them and kicked them to the side. I stood infront of him then, in just my bra and underwear. His hands twitched, almost as if they wanted to reach for me, but he put them flat down on the bed on either side of him. I took that as my cue to step away, grabbing his shirt and turning around, I reached behind me, unclasping my bra and sliding it off. I pulled his top on, then walking carefully around the room, picking up are discarded clothes.

I felt his eyes on me, following my path. I put the clothes in the hamper, putting away everything else, then turned back to the bed. He hadn't moved, still sitting on the edge with his hands know in fists by his sides.

"Are you going to get ready?" His eyes flashed to mine, seemingly startled.

"I uh..I'm ganna take a quick shower." He stood up, kissing me briefly on the cheek and disappeared into the bathroom. I sighed, that seemed to be his go to, to get out of the room as quickly as possible. I tried to ignore the slight rejection, turning off all the lights and crawled into bed, making myself comfortable.

I was still up when I heard the shower shut off. I was facing the window, watching the moon slowly crawl across the sky, and the door swung open, the light briefly illuminating the room till I heard the switch, and everything was dark again. My ears listened to the sound of his soft footsteps, and a draw opened then closed. A moment later the bed moved, and I felt his warmth surrond me, his body sliding inches away from mine.

He didn't say anything, but I felt the static air around us, somehow tense. A few moments passed until I couldn't take it anymore, I turned around. He was laying on his back, the blankets pulled up to his waist, his chest bare and his arm's tucked under his head. His eyes found me when I moved, but they seemed troubled.

"Come here." He said quietly, extending his arm out infront of me. It was all the invitation I needed. I moved forward, quickly molding my body around his, my head resting on his chest. His arms wrapped around me, settling on my back, and mine was drapped across his chest, my hand resting over his heart.

Slowly I relaxed, letting sleep take me away curled up in his arms.


	29. Chapter 29: Best Friends

A/N: Im happy to say that after two weeks of being sick I'm finally recovering, so hopefully there will be more updates coming soon! Enjoy and Review my Darlings.

* * *

I woke up early the next morning, prying myself out of his grip and sliding out of bed. The room seemed unusually bright, and a glance out the window explained everything. The sun was out, shining and reflecting off the blanket of white snow covering the ground. It didn't snow often, maybe a couple times a year, but when it did it was always beautiful.

I grabbed my phone from the dresser, and made my way to the bathroom. Once inside I pulled up my texts, sending one to Ally.

I turned on the nozzle, letting the shower head on full force. A buzz sounded and I walked back to the counter, picking it up.

 **YA IM UP. WHAT'S UP?- ALLY.**

I didn't bother texting her back, instead I hit the green phone icon and held the speaker to my ear. It rang only once, then cut off and I heard her on the other end.

"Renesmee." She stated.

"Allyson." I countered.

"Allright, you win. What's up cupcake?" I rolled my eyes at her odd nicknames.

"Well, its almost christmas, and since I'm going on vacation after I need me some Ally time." I heard her laugher throught the phone, and could picture her smile.

"That sounds like a great idea. Today?" I nodded before forgetting she couldn't see me.

"Yess please."

"Okay, meet me at my house and we'll go from there?" She asked.

"That sounds like a plan, I just need to shower and change. Ill be there in about..let's say two hours."

"Ya right, with you it'll be closer to three. Ill see you later." She giggled then hung up.

I hopped off the counter, turning on some music and pulled off my clothes. I opened the frosted glass door, and stepped in, letting the hot water roll of me.

I lathered my favorite shampoo into my hair, breathing in the floral and passion fruit fragrance and washing it out. Then I did the same with my conditioner, twisting it up into a bun to let it soak.

I let the hot water run over my tense muscles, relaxing into the heat and music. It was a recording of daddy's music, my favorite compositions I could listen to whenever I wanted. I hummed along to the notes, swaying under the spray.

I was jolted out of my peacefull reverie by a loud knock on the door, and it cracked open a couple inches.

"Ness baby, I'm making breakfest, do u want something?" Jake asked.

I opened the shower door, looking around to the sound of his voice. He was in the doorway, but his eyes were cast down.

"That sounds good, I'll have whatever u make." I saw him nod absently to himself, then reach for the handle.

"Hey Jake?" Like a reflex his head lifted to my question, his eyes finding mine. I knew I was coverd behind the door, but he gulped visibly and his hand tightened on the door knob.

"Ya?" He asked, his voice was rough.

"Is it okay if I go see Ally for alittle today?" I saw a ghost of a smile on his face.

"Of course you can, you don't have to ask. I don't own you." He chided, his eyes floating off my face.

"I know, I just wasn't sure if u had plans." I explained. He shook his head almost absentmindedly.

"Alright. Ill be out in a couple minutes." He glanced back at me, just standing there and then nodded once, closing the door.

I sighed, closing the door behind me. I finished washing my body then rinsed, shutting off the water and stepping out. I wrapped a large towel around me, and walked out to the room.

I could hear Jake in the kitchen, humming something to himself and I went to the dresser, that now contained almost more of my clothes then his own. I picked out my underwear and bra, shut the door and towel dried my hair.

I pulled them on, contemplating what I wanted to wear. It was snowing, so I had to wear something warm, for appearance sake. I picked out my dark grey leggings, pulling them on and adding a white tanktop. Just then I heard Jake from the kitchen.

"If your not out here in one minute I'm eating your food." He called, and I knew he would to.

Deciding to finish dressing later I pulled the door open. I stepped over a sleeping Gatsby in the hallway, walking into the open kitchen. He sat at the island, eating his plate of eggs and bacon. Beside him, was a smaller version of his mountain of food.

I went to the fridge, pulling out my favorite juice and put it on the counter, then grabbed a cup from the cabinet. He sat across from me, eating his food but I felt his gaze on me. I poured my cup, pushed it over towards my food and replaced the juice to the fridge. I went to walk around the other side of him for my food when his hand shot out suddenly, grabbing hold of my waist and creating a barrier.

"And just what do you think your diong?" He asked. His face raised to mine, his dark brown eyes held humor and he had a smirk on his face. I stepped closer, his face inches away from mine and smiled sweetly.

"Im trying to eat the food my wonderful boyfreind made me." I said.

"Doesn't said boyfreind get a thank you?" He scoffed, giving a small pout. He really did look adorable when he did that. I stepped closer, my body flush to his side and leaned my head towards his, I stopped barely millimeters away.

"Thank you." I whisperd. I felt his lips curl up into a smile before he moved the rest of the way, his lips molding to mine. I kissed him briefly before pulling away, not wanting to push my control right know, it only seemed to leave me more frustrated then before. I sat down and started on my food.

"What are you ganna do today?" I asked conversationally while I finished my breakfest.

"I don't really have any plans, probably going to do some last minute Christmas shopping." He said, looking alitte guilty. I laughed, and started cleaning up the dishes.

"You haven't finished yet?" He stood up, streching and slowly backing away to the couch.

"Maybe.." he grinned and flopped down on the cushions, grabbing the remote from the table and switching on the tv. I rolled my eyes and headed back into the bedroom.

I pounderd thought my clothes, picking a black long sleeve sweater dress that fit snuggly. I paired it with black tall boots and collected my phone, wallet and keys. When I walked back out to the living room he hadn't moved.

"Im heading out." He looked up from his show, distracted and nodded vaguely. I couldn't help but laugh, he was always so perfect sometimes I forget he's still just a guy.

"Love you." I called out, making my way out the door and into the big house. It was relatively empty excpect for mom in the living room, curled on the coach with a book in her hand.

"Mom? Im going out with Ally..is that okay?" She glanced up, smiling gently.

"Of course sweatheart. Let me know if u need anything." I passed by the sofa, leaning over the side and kissed her cheek.

"Thank you. I love you." She sighed happily, and I knew how much it meant it to her to hear. I was her only child, would always be her only child. I opened the door heading down into the basement.

In the vase space sat all the Cullen's vehicle's. Grandpa's Mercede's was gone, along with Alice's porsche and daddy's volvo. Left was Rosalie's BMW, Emmett's massive jeep, my Tesla, Jacob's dodge and his motorcycle. I rememberd growning up and always wanting to learn to ride, but mom and dad had said no. So instead I watched Jake work on his vehicles, always mezmarized on how he could get a bunch of parts to run perfectly smooth together.

I hopped in my Tesla, hitting the start button and listing to the quiet purr of the engine. I hit the garage open button and pulled out from the underground garage, coming around from the side to the front. I came to a stop when I saw him, laughing and rolling down my window.

"What are you diong?" He frowned, taking a couple large steps and he was there, bending over with his face inches from mine. I felt my heart take off, pulsing throught my body.

"Well, I relized what an ass I was to let you go without a kiss." Jake said, grinning. He ducked his head into the window, turning to accommodate the angle and pressed his warms lips firmly to mine. I couldn't help the small moan that came from my chest, having him so close. When he pulled back he was grinning, his eyes shining.

"That's much better. I love you." He kissed me once more and pulled back, taking a step away from my car. But I was hopeless, dazed from his intoxicating aroma that still lingerd in the air around me.

I tried to clear my head, shaking it slightly and thinking of anything but him. I heard a ghostly chuckled but when I looked out my window he was gone.

I drove to Ally's house, listening to music and trying to rid Jake out of head. It was so much harder then it sounded. It seemed like the more time that passed the more he was in my every thought.

When I pulled up to her house half an hour later my head was a bit clearer and I stepped out, heading up to her walkway. I rang the door bell, listening to the sounds inside. I heard small footsteps run up to the door, yanking it open and peering around.

Jonah was on the other side, his black hair sticking up at odd angles, his glasses crooked on his nose. He was incredibly shy, even after knowing me for two years. Last year he had finally started talking again, even tho iv only heard him a handlefull of times, he seemes to like me well enough. I smiled, kneeling down closer to his high, he was very small for his age, going on 12.

"Hi Jonah. Is Ally home?" I asked, keeping my voice low and gentle. He blushed, but nodded his head, stepping back and opening the door for me. I stepped in, closing it behind me and he pointed up the stairs.

"Thank you." I smiled and turned around, heading up the stairs. I walked down the hallway, coming to her door that stood ajar. I pushed it open all the way, stepping in.

She was laying across her bed, her head dangling off the edge, her long straigh strawberry blond hair swinging to the floor. The minute she saw me she lifted her arm to her face. Upside down still.

"Your late." She stated, and I saw the watch on her wrist as she moved it away. I laughed at her, and her odd tendencies.

"Your weird, you know that?" She eyed me, a look of concentration on her face. Then she just shrugged and smiled.

"So how come your late. Get...distracted?" She winked. I sighed, and rolled my eyes. I stepped over to her desk, sitting in her computer chair and leaning back.

"No, just slow I guess." I said. "Will you sit up, your ganna make your self dizzy." I told her, watching her face get steadily redder. She stuck out her tongue and then lifted her self up, spinning around on the bed till she was up right, on her stomach.

"Someone's irritable today. What's wrong? Jake not satisfying you?" She said, snickering. I swear sometimes she was way to much like Emmett. But I tried to ignore her, not thinking about how close she really was on her comment. I looked around the room, taking in some of her more recent sketches.

"Omg! That's totally it!" She exclaimed. My face promptly blushed, and I looked anywhere but at her.

"Honestly, I have no clue what your on about." I said defensively, standing up and walking around her room.

"Ness, you can't pull that on me. I know you, your botherd by something, and I'm willing to bet by your face it's that." She said anoyyingly right.

She did know me, so well. Even tho there were things I couldn't tell her she seemed to understand. she never questioned when one of my family members did something alittle odd, or when my story's just didn't seem to fit, because there was something I had to leave out. She never asked, weather she knew why or not, I didn't know, but I knew she was unwavering in her freindship. I sighed, turning around and slumping against her wall.

"Its..complicated.." I said. She rolled her eyes, sitting up and her face was alert.

"Isn't it always?" She challenged. I wondered what that meant, but let it pass, trying to form an answer for her.

"Well..its..sorta like that...we literally spend all day together, share his bed all night and he still somehow has so much control. He want's to wait till were completely alone and away from my family, which I get but that never happens!" My built up frustration seemed to bubble over, and the words just tumbled out.

"I mean it's like he just does it on purpose! Kisses me and gets me botherd then just disappears into the shower or something else like its nothing! Its so frustating." I huffed, walking back to the chair and plopping down on it. I looked up and realizing what I said turned a depper shade of red.

"Im sorry, I didn't mean to say that." I said, embarrassed. She didn't look botherd tho, she was patiently sitting, and listening.

"I don't mind at all. I get your frustration...and I also get his point. That's a big step, and he wants to be totally alone for it...that being said, its not fair to you for him to just go jack off himself and leave you unsatisfied." My mouth actually fell open at her words, taking in the meaning.

"He doesn- I mean..He wo-" I studderd.

"Oh Hunny. Don't be stupid. Of course he does. That's probably the only thing keeping him from ripping of your clothes." I shook my head slowly, trying to gather my thoughts. She always had a way of breaking things down into simple terms for me to understand.

"Ok..so maybe he does..now what?"

"Well, aren't you going to forks to visit his family after Christmas? You won't be any where near your family then." Her words sank in, and she was right.

"Ya..ya we are."

"Well there ya go." She said plainly, like it was abvously right infront of my face.

"Ya..maybe.." I spaced alittle, thinking about my options. I pulled myself out a couple moments later, wanting the push this aside for later.

"So how are you?" I asked her, genuinely curious, we hadn't had much time to catch up lately. She shrugged her shoulders, leaning back into her pillows, her eyes wandering over to a sketch pinned up on her wall.

"The same I guess...you know..its kind of weird...but, latly iv felt like something is just around the corned..like something big is about to happen...is that crazy?" She asked, her face genuinely worried, but somehow excited.

"No. Intuition is a very strong thing. You better keep your eyes open." She grinned, her eyes drifting back to the sketch.

I followed her eyes, looking at it trying to make sense of it. It was very dark, all greys and blacks. I could make out some woods, and blurry streak running through them.

"What's that?" I asked, gesturing towards it.

"You know what, I have no clue. I keep dreaming about it tho, a couple times a week. The more I see it the more I can kinda make it out. It's some animal I think, running in the woods, but it's not anyplace around her. Me and Jonah used to go camping with are dad all the time, and I don't recognize it." Her brow creased, staring fixedly at the picture.

"You know, it kinda looks like the woods in la push." I said, noticing the tree formations.

"In forks?" She asked.

"Ya, la push is part of the Indian reservation in forks, its were Jacob grew up." I said. She nodded, understanding something.

"That expains it, he's part Indian? I always wondered why he was so huge and tan." I laughed at her serious expression.

"Ya, hes like the great great grandson of the last tribal leader. So he's pretty important, and it's not just him, you should see the rest of the guys."

I stood up, taking out my cell phone and scrolling through my photos. I knew I had a good one of everybody at the beach from a visit last year. It was a rare warm and sunny day in the summer time and almost the whole pack had gatherd for a beach trip. I had snapped one of Jacob, Quil, Paul, Embry, and Seth playing in the sand, tossing a football back and forth. Seth had his back to the camera, but the other guys were all facing foward. I sat on the bed near her, handing her my phone. She looked it over, her eyes widened and taking in the guys.

"Holy shit. Your not joking." She stared at the guy's, her mouth hanging open slightly.

"Dam Ness, can I come visit with you?" She laughed, handing my phone back.

"They'll probably come up for graduation. I know Alice will want to throw a party and those guys love to party." I said fondly, missing my extanded family.

We spent most of the day just hanging out, talking about school and graduation. She was excited for are senior prom this year, as she was on the decorations committee.

Later we went out for a late lunch, finding some Italian restaurant to eat at.

"Do you know what collage you want to go to?" I asked. She had been going back and forth between collages. She had good grades, but her true passion was art. She couldn't decided weather to go with a risky career like an artist or something more practical. She sighed, putting down her fork and pushing her plate away.

"I think iv narrowed down where, I'm going to stay her in Montana. I can't leave mom alone by herself with Jonah." She said, twirling her straw in her soda absentmindedly.

"But is that what you want?" I questioned. I knew Ally still felt responsible for her dad's death, and I knew she also felt obligated to her family, her two brothers had left as soon as they could, and it was just her, Jonah and her mom. She smiled alittle, her face trying to look happy.

"Yes." she said, but I wasn't convinced. I let it go for now, cause I knew how stubborn she was about this subject. We finished are food and headed out, back towards her house. I pulled up, turning of the engine.

"So I figured since we won't see eachother before Christmas we could exchange gifts now?" She grinned, hoping out of the car and quickly making her way inside.

I laughed at her enthusiasm, and reached into the back seat, picking up the wrapped present I had put in there the other day. I got out, making my way inside her house. She came bounding down the stairs a moment later, a wrapped present in her hands. She had a large devilish smile and it immediately worried me.

She held out her hand, present and all and I did the same. We both laughed, taking the other's present. It was roughly the same shape and size of the one I had just given her and I couldn't help but laugh.

I watched as she tore into her present. Ripping the wrapper off and staring at it in her hands. I saw her eyes dart over the cover, do a double take then widen, her mouth falling open slightly.

"Ness you didn't!" She squealed, holding the heavy volume in her hands like it was made from gold. It was a complete works and biography of Salvador Dali, her all time favorite artist.

"This must of cost alot..how did you even find it!." She finally looked at me, her eyes huge and excited. I honestly couldn't keep myself from laughing at her.

"I promise I didn't even pay a thing, believe it or not my family owned it. It was in Carlisle's study and I just asked him and he said it was alright."

She seemed frozen, between utter excitement and her unwillingness to accept such a generous gift. But she seemed to choose, quickly throwing her arms around me and hugging me tightly.

I hugged her back, waiting for her calm down enough to open my own. It wasn't until a couple minutes later she was grinning from ear to ear, clutching the book to her chest.

"Okay..I'm good. Im fine...Your turn." She took a large breath, turning her attention to my hands.

I flipped it over. Weighing it in my hands, thinking about what it could be.

"Oh just open it!" She laughed. The glint back in her eyes, and I was sure what ever it was would most likely get me introuble.

I pulled a corner, revealing the hardcover of a book. I pulled another inch, revealing a dark red cover. I heard her groan in impatience and I laughed, quickly pulling off the rest of the wrapping.

Yup. I was so right about this one.

In my hands was a black and red book, and across the front cover read. Sex Education for partners.

And for some reason, I couldn't help but find it beyond hysterical. I busted out laughing, hugging her.

"Do you like it?" She grinned. "Its from the same author." I knew she meant from my first book.

"I love it. Thank you. No body else would be ballsy enough to get it for me."

She smiled happily, and I grinned at my best friend.


	30. Chapter 30: Casual Wensday

The following week up to Christmas was spent in excitement at summit prepotory school. The whole building constantly buzzed around holiday plans.

We only had to go to school Monday, Tuesday and Wednesday. As thursday was Christmas Eve. The school decided Wednesday was a treat, we were informed that it would be a casual day, which meant no uniforms.

When I got out and made my way home it was to a find a tiny Aunt Alice nearly vibrating with excitement, holding the mail from school informing family of casual wensday.

"This is so exciting, your finally ganna be able to wear something decent! Oh what will we chose? Maybe Coco Chanel, or Donna Karan. Oh I know! Giorgio Armani, oh but I do love the new line from Ralph Lauren."

She went on at top speed, and if I hadn't been half vampire I would never have been able to hear her words. I laughed and stepped forward, putting my palms on her tiny shoulders to hold her still.

"Aunt Alice, you do know it's tomorrow right?" Her delicate features fell slighlty, but then got a very determined look.

"Let me handle that. I want you in your room, ready for me by 6 Got it?" She grinned and once I nodded started out towards the garage.

"No Heels!" I shouted, and I actually heard her huff.

Giggling I made my way up stairs to change. Jacob was out at his college, passing in some paperwork and was going to sign up for the additional classes so he could graduate this year. I knew it was what he wanted, but adding two more classes meant I would see him less then I already did.

I changed out of my school uniform, leaving it in a pile in the corner. It would be a whole week and half before I had to wear it again. I pulled on comfy yoga pants, and a tshirt, and decided to finish wrapping christmas presents.

Around 6 I heard grandma call up to me that dinner was ready. Already finished with my wrapping I had been reading. I put my book down, sliding out and making my way to the kitchen. When I entered the delicious aroma assaulted my senses.

"Mmm, that smells amazing Grandma. What is it?"

"Its called Paella. It's a classic spanish rice dish. It's midly complicated to make and I wanted to try my hand at it." She smiled, serving me a plate and set it on the island. I had just sat down when I heard the door open quickly, and then shut with more force then normal.

I heard his grumbled muttering before I saw him, then his earthy scent reached my nose and he came around the corner. His hands were balled into fists and he was still muttering under his breath. I heard a few interesting choice words before his eyes landed on me and grandma, and he controlled his tongue.

"Now Jacob, that's no way to speak infront of a lady." She scolded him, already making him a plate of food.

"Sorry Esme.." He mumbled, and walked over to my side, taking the other seat at the island and started devouring his food. Grandma poured us each a cup of milk and set them on the table.

"Grandma, were is everybody?"

"You know I'm not sure. Carlisle's at work, Bella and Edward took off this morning and I heard Alice say something about Calvin Klein and then she was gone." She said, a faint smile on her face. No matter what they did they were her children, and she loved them all so much.

I nodded vaguely, but glanced over at Jake. He was eating almost violently, stabbing his food with his fork. His back was rigid, and he looked stressed. I could tell he was angry, at what tho I didn't know.

The rest of dinner passed without so much as a word from him, and I helped grandma clean up. I took his hand after, felt it relax slightly at my touch and pulled him forward.

"Thank you Grandma. It was amazing."

I tugged his hand till he followed me out the back door, vering of to the right and around the covered pool into his home. I walked down the hallway, into his room. I wanted to be as far from the big house as I could get. When I made my way inside I pulled him to the bed, pushing gently till he sat then turned around to close the door. I walked back, leaving about a foot inbetween us.

"..Jake..?" His eyes met mine, again softening alittle.

"What's wrong?" He sighed, and reached out for me, his big hands on my hips and pulled me forward till I stood between his legs.

"Nothing Ness, it was just a bad day. Im sorry." I shook my head, wrapping my arm's his neck.

"Theres nothing to be sorry about. Do you want to talk about it?" He shrugged, averting his eyes around the room. I knew he was use to handling thing's on his own, and it could be difficult sometimes to talk about his feelings.

"Its just...a bunch of stupid shit. Seth called this morning to tell me he got in an argument with a customer, and he gave her my number! So she called me and I had to deal with her for over an hour." I felt his hands tighen on me, reliving his irritation.

"Then I was almost late for my appointment with my professor cause she wouldn't shut up and I wasn't paying enough attention to the road and I got fucking pulled over and got a speeding ticket!" His chest heaved now, anger swelling back up.

"So I got my paperwork all done and I'm leaving the campus and pass by this stupid group of guy's talking about some hot chick and how he wanted her and I didn't think anything of it Nope, of course until he started discribing her and I relized that he was talking about you." I saw the spark in his eyes, his hands shook against my waist. For some reason I felt my cheeks get hotter, a blush working its way up my face.

"I knew I couldn't rip the guy's head off right there in campus, and I had to walk away and leave that scum thinking he had anychance in hell with you." He growled, and I knew I had to calm him down.

I stepped closer, tighing my arm's around his neck and pulled him against me. With him sitting on the bed I was slightly taller, and his face burrowed into my neck, his arm's sliding to my back and holding me tightly. He didn't move for several minutes, but I could feel his heavy breaths slow down, to a more even pace.

Another couple minutes passed and I felt him shift slightly, his head pulling back just enough for his lips to graze my skin. His hands slid forward, falling to my hips again and they tightened.

"Im sorry you had a bad day." I whisperd, trying to ignore his lips on my neck.

"S'ok." He mumbled, his lips ghosting across my skin. A shudder ran through my spine and I knew he felt it, cause his lips turned up into a smile.

He trailed down, his lips leaving hot damp kisses. He paused right above my collorbone, his tounge darting out across my flesh. Another shiver forced its way down down my body, and my legs felt weak. I loosend my arm's from him, sliding them back till my hands rested on his shoulders.

His hands moved, one sliding up my back and into my hair. The other slid down, over my ass and stopped. His fingers flexed, pulling me closer but between his legs I couldn't move anymore. His hand untangled from my hair, sweeping up to my neck and pulled the thick curtain of my hair onto the other side, and I tilted my head with it, giving him better access.

His mouth closed over my skin, sucking gently and a breathless moan fell from my mouth. My hands slid down his arms, on his biceps and gripped them tightly. I could feel his heavy breath on me, his chest rising and falling faster.

His hand slid down further, settling on the back of my thigh and the other one soon joined. I felt his hand put pressure on me, pulling my thigh up. He placed it on the outside of his hip, on the bed and I gripped his shoulers, lifting my other and copying him.

His hands gripped my thighs, pulling me tightly to his body. His mouth left my skin, and he pulled back, his eyes finding mine. They burned with something powerful, and I guest it still had something to do with those guy's and his bad day, his hands felt almost desperate.

He leaned forward, capturing my lips with his forcefully. His hands slid up under my shirt, pressing into my back. His kisses were strong, claiming my mouth. I tried to keep a rational thought on are situation, one of us had to be in control, and it was clear right now that he was not. But his warm skin on mine was making me dizzy and my hands fell to his navel, slipping under his shirt and running up his mucled stomach. I could feel him tense under my palms, flexing.

 _Take it off._ I thought, tugging on his shirt.

He broke away, reaching behind him and pulling his shirt off in seconds, then quickly moving back, his tongue slipping into my mouth and his taste was like adrenaline in my viens. My hands smoothed over his chest, my fingers tingling with the feel of him.

I knew I was running out of control, my emotions getting the best of me. His hands slipped back under my top, on my waist and slid up, dragging the fabric with it. His thumbs brushed lightly over my bra as he pulled it up farther and I lifted my arms and let him tug it over my head. He dropped it somewhere and his arms encased me again, pulling me flush to his bare chest.

His hot skin on mine drove me crazy and I moaned into his mouth. The sound only seemed to spur him on more and he gripped my side's, quickly rolling till I was flat on my back and he was kneeling between my legs. I scooted further up the bed, giving him more space and he crawled up to, his left hand bracing himself up by my right ear.

His dark eyes roamed over my body, my chest heaving, filling with his scent and it did nothing to clear my head. My right hand raised, gripping his forearm for something to hold onto. My other lifted to his chest, running my fingertips lightly down his body. I saw him shudder at the contact, and his eyes closed, fluttering shut and he groaned.

The sound only ignited me further and my hand slid around to his lower back and tugged, willing him closer. He listened, sliding his knee's down further and lowering his body to rest between my thighs. He dropped from his hand to his elbow, keeping most of his weight of me and my hands fell to his sides, holding him to me.

His free hand raised, softly stroking my cheek. It ran slowly, across my skin, his fingertips barely touching. My already pounding heart seemed to be trying to escape my chest, and I was sure if I were human I would of died from a heart attack.

His hand continued some invisible path, down my jaw and across my neck. He stroked my collorbone, and my flesh erupted into goosepimples, a shiver following. I saw his face break into a grin as it slowly trailed down my sternum. His hand paused just over my heart, and his palm flattened, feeling the thumping rhythm.

His eyes met mine, softening somehow and his smile was more relaxed this time. He reached over, taking my hand in his and pressed it palm open to the front of his chest, right over his heart. His hand went back to his previous spot, over mine and I couldn't help but smile up at him.

Under my palm, his heart was hammering just as strong as my own. I knew why he placed my hand there, and I loved him even more for it. I slid my hand up his chest, around his neck and tugged gently. He obeyed, leaning down and kissing me.

The pressure of his hand lightened, returning to just his fingertips and continuing there torturous path. He followed the curve of my breast, down the valley between them until he reached my bra, then followed it up the left side, over the swell of my skin and up my strap.

His hand hesitated, then trailed down my arm, my strap still caught with his finger. He had just slipped it past my shoulder when I heard the distant sound of a car door shut.

It must of registered with him to, cause he stopped, his lips becoming unresponsive to my own. He pulled back, the clear annoyance written on his face. The sounds only served to remind us that we were infact less then 30 feet from my family's house. I heard his deep sigh before he replaced my strap, gave me a long lingering look, then began to climb off me, sliding off the bed.

I didn't move, just watched him as he stood up. He picked up are shirts, tossing his in the hamper and mine onto the bed besides me. He pulled off his socks, unbuttoned his jeans and pulled them off to. I watched him step out of them, his strong legs appearing. He stook in his boxers, adding the rest of his clothes to the hamper.

"Im ganna shower." He said and turned, walking into the bathroom.

Frustrated, I sighed and sat up. I heard the water turn on and I reached behind me, unhooking my bra and tossing it onto the floor. I pulled my shirt back on, and climbed up into the bed.

A comment that Ally had made last weekend floated its way into my head, about Jake's showers and I blushed just thinking about it. There was no way she was right. I tried pushing it out of my head, turning towards the room and snuggling into the blankets. My pants twisted around my ankles and I tucked my arms into the blanket, grabbing the soft material and shimmying it down my legs, then yanked them off, tossing them onto the floor near my bra.

I tried to get comfy again, pulling the blankets up. But the thought floated back, and I found myself unconsciously stretching my hearing, listening to the sound of water running. This was crazy, there was no way she was right. Embarrassed by my own self I tried to ignore it, it would be a violation of his privacy.

But my curiosity was to great, and my hearing seemed to find him again, giving up trying not to. I could make out the water hitting against something hard, and listening harder I heard his deep breathing.

His heavy, loud almost panting. I froze, waiting for something to confirm what I was hearing. I picked up his heart beat, knowing the sound of it like the back of my hand. It was thumbing loudly, much faster then it's normal pace. I was frozen, my ears still listening. His heart beat faster, his breaths still fast and shallow.

Then I heard his heart accelerate, beating furiously and his breath stopped altogether, for one short pause and came out as a low deep groan.

My face flamed dark red, boiling under my skin. I couldn't believe what I had heard, but I couldn't deny it anymore. It was clear as day, abvous know that I had actually listened. I could still hear him, his heartbeat returning to normal and his breath slowed to a natural pace.

I knew I should feel guilty for listening, but really he knew I was right on the other side of the wall. Oddly enough I felt more anoyyed then anything, frustrated that Ally had been right. He kissed me and got me worked up, then disappeared and...relieved himself.

I heard the water shut off, and quickly turned around to face the window. I willed my blush to fade as I heard the the door open. I kept my breathing to a low even pace, like it was when I slept.

The draw opened and closed, and the sound of fabric against skin sounded. A couple seconds later the bed sagged, bearing his weight. His body slid up behind me, and his arm drapped over my waist.

"Ness?" He whisperd, but I decided it was to risky, so I stayed quiet. A moment later I felt his lips press to my head tenderly.

"I love you baby." He whisperd again, then settled down behind me. It was only a couple minutes later I felt the steady slow rythem of his chest against my back and I knew he was out. It took me several more minutes before I could clear my head enough to drift off to sleep.

I woke the next morning to my alarm, sliding quickly out of bed and shutting it off before it could wake Jake. It was 5:30, and if I was late for Alice I i would never hear the end of it.

I picked up my pants from the floor, pulling them on and grabbed my phone. I know Jake's alarm would go off at 630 so I left, making my way inside the big house and up to my room. I got in the shower, washing quickly and hopped out, wrapping a large towel around me.

When I walked out to my room Alice was already there, sitting on my made bed with a stack of clothing besides her. She promply handed a couple garments to me, and I walked right back into the bathroom, laughing.

I pulled on the bra and underwear first, noting how comfortable they were. They were both made from a silky material, the edges were a delicate lace and they were a dark grey color.

I picked up the jean's next, almost surprised by this choice. Of course they had a designer tag, and were skin tight, sitting low on my hips and they were a dark blue, with carefully constructed rips across my thighs and knees.

Next was the top, the first thing I noticed was how utterly soft it was. I pulled it on, over my head and in place. I felt the collor sitting snugly on my neck, and glanced in the mirror. It was a turtle neck, dark grey in a soft fuzzy material. It had long sleeves but just reeched the top of my jeans.

It looked pretty good with my skin tone, and I reached for my towel, gently ringing out my hair, and walked back into my room. Alice was pacing impatiently across my floor, when I stepped out she stopped and grinning, clapped her hands.

"Yay! Good, I was right. Okay, so put these on."

She handed me a pair of black boots. I went to my dresser, pulling out some black socks and sat on my bed, putting them on. I slipped my foot into the boot, pulling the rest of it up. It was a sort of floppy material, coming all the way up to just past my knee and had a thin string to tighen and keep them in place. I put on the other one and stood, showing her. She beamed happily, her little hands clasped together.

"Alright, sit down over there and ill do your hair."

I sat down at my computer desk, facing the wall and closing my eyes. I felt my brush run through my long hair, enjoying the feeling. I waited while she worked, breifly thanking that she didn't put me through this everymorning.

"All done." She sang happily. I got up, and walking back into the bathroom, my eyes landing on my hair.

Again I was actually suprised by how simple it looked. She had combed the top back, into a high ponytail, while the rest flowed softly down my back. I turned towards her, smiling and hugged her.

"Honestly Alice, I have no clue how you do it. It's perfect. Thank you." I stepped back, taking in her happy expression. It was so simple sometimes to please her. I went over to my dresser, pulling on my favorite necklace from Jake.

"Well I knew you would want to be comfortable, and since its still technically high school it had to be appropriate." She grinned.

"Your lucky, she was never that considerate off me." My mom's voice floated in from the open door, laughing.

"Yes well, Ness doesn't fight me as much as you use to." Alice stuck out her tongue at mom and grinned.

"And I thought a turtle neck would cover that mark on your neck." Alice winked, grinning wickedly to herself. I blushed, but shrugged, getting use to the jokes.

"Are we done?" I asked, grabbing my phone.

"No! I have one more thing for you." She said quickly, disappearing and returning with a jacket. It was a long, grey peacoat, with the collar and trim around the hands black. The buttons on the front were asymmetrical, going dyiaganoly from top to bottom.

"Alice..I love it. It's adorable." I said enthusiastically. She practically bounced out of her skin with the compliment.

I grabbed my new coat from her and school bag, heading towards the stairs and the smell of eggs. I loved eggs.

Downstairs I walked into the kitchen, finding Jacob already eating his breakfest, and grandma sliding a plate towards the other chair. Dad was already here, sitting at the table and his eyes fell immediately to mom as she trailed in after me.

I put my bag down, heading for my stool but Jacob must of finally noticed me, cause he glanced up, took one look over my whole body and his mouth practically fell open. His eyes seemed to widen, sweeping over me again. I tried extremely hard not blush, but ducked my head away from everybody else. Out of the corner of my eye I saw Jacob's face quickly morfe into a 'oh shit' expression and he glanced at dad. He furrowed his brow, as if trying to determine wheather he was in trouble and I saw mom grin and wink.

I tried ignoring the eyes I felt on me while I ate, but it did no use. Finally it was an acceptable time enough to leave, and I put my dishes in the sink, kissed grandmas cheek with a quick thank you and dashed out the front door, calling out a bye.

"Wait you forgot your coat!" Alice yelled, and I heard Jake tell her he would take it.

I waited outfront in the cool air, leaning againts Jake's car. I wasn't sure why I had felt the need to run away, I just felt like everybody was looking at me.

He came out a moment later, my coat in one hand, my bag in the other, and a grin on his handsome face. For some reason it made me blush, and I turned away, pouting like a petulant 9 year old.

He met me, opening the door and tossing my bag in. But before I could climb in his hand shot out, blocking my path. His body slid close to mine, his chest less then a foot away from my face. His other hand raised, gently taking my chin and tilting it up towards his face. His dark eyes were locked onto mine, reading me.

"Care to tell me why you were so bothered you practically ran out of the house?" His warm breath blew out, swirling around me and I breathed in his scent, feeling slightly dizzy.

"You were staring." I mumbled, hoping he wouldn't hear. But I knew I wasn't that lucky. His eyes watched me, his face slighlty confused.

"So?" He said, like it was the most natural thing in the world. I shrugged, barely understanding the feeling myself. His hands both came up, cradling my face between his large palms.

"I was staring because you look beyond incredible Renesmee." He whisperd leaning down, his lips inches from mine.

"So Beautiful." His face slid to the side, his mouth near my ear.

"So sexy." He barely breathed, so low I didn't even think it could carry to the big house. A shiver ran down my back, and I trembled in his arm's. He pulled back, capturing my lips with his own and I felt my legs tremble, weak under my weight. His hands slid down to my waist, supporting me like he knew I needed it. When he pulled back he had the biggest shit eating grin, and I could tell he had felt it. He pulled back alittle more, his eyes roaming my body and he grimaced alittle. I raised my palm, placing it on his hot cheek.

 _What's wrong?_ His eyes landed on mine again, unhappy.

"Im just thinking about you going to school in this." His finger ran over a tiny sliver of skin that was exposed by my abdomen, as if proving his point. I felt goosepimples erupt all over my skin.

 _Im in love with you my Jacob. No body on this planet will ever have any piece of my heart or body the way you do._

His eyes shone bright, heavy emotion bubbling beneath the surface. He leaned forward again, kissing me, this time much more slow, tender but not any less passionate.

I _f you expect me to go to school anytime soon you have to stop that._ I thought weakly, keeping my hands to myself by sheer will.

He smiled, pulling away and wordlessly held up my jacket, allowing my arms to slip into the sleeves. When I turned around he moved forward, his strong hands buttoning up the front. He studied me for another moment, leaning forward so his mouth was once again near my ear, his breath low and quiet.

"I can't wait till you come home." Then he stepped back, holding my door open and waiting for me to climb in.

It was several seconds before I could force my legs to move, one after the other getting into the car. The door shut behind me and then he was getting in, turning it on and pulling out of the driveway.

I heard him chuckle, probably amused by my still half drunken state. He drove in relative silence, and I was just trying to concetrate on slowing my breathing and clearing my head of his teasing words.

Faster then what seemed normal we arrived in the parking lot, Jake pulling into his normal spot. He put it in park, shifting in his spot to face me and his hand reached out for mine.

"I wish you didn't have to go, I already miss you." He said sadly. I tried to smile, but I knew what he meant.

"Well just think, one more day then we get a whole week and a half. Then graduation, and no more school." I smiled, trying to lighten the mood. But my comment had raised questions in my head. What was coming after graduation? He grinned, clearly not wondering what I had been.

"Alright. Go before I take you hostage." but his hand tightened on mine, and I leaned over, sliding my hand up his chest and pressing my lips to his.

"Ill see you later." I said, forcing myself to release him and get out of the car. I slung my bag over my shoulder, taking one last look at him and turning to walk into the lot.

I wasn't halfway across when I saw the long strawberry hair come flying towards me. I laughed as Ally stopped infront me, her usual state of distress even greater, but she had a huge smile on her face.

"Merry Christmas eve eve!" She shouted, spreading her arm's like she was the best present in the world.

"Someones in a good mood." I commented, pulling her along to the building. She had opted to go comfortable today, her favorite pair of warn in jeans, a band tshirt I didn't recognize, and her jacket pulled on over. She had a graphite pencil stuck behind her ear and black smudged already across her hand.

"Absolutely! No stupid uniforms. Tomorrow's christmas eve and charlie is coming home to visit. And guess what!" She said suddenly, her face excited.

"I had another dream last night, and I could finally make out what the animal is! It's a wolf! But not a normal one, it looks huge. Kinda reminds me of the one on your necklace, but a way different color. " Her words stopped me in my place, fear running through my system.

"Ness? You okay?" I nodded, trying to relax my limbs. It had to just be some coincidence. She saw my painting and pictures all the time, the image must of stuck in her brain.

"Y-ya. Of course. Umm. Come on, were ganna be late for first period." I tugged her forward, hoping she didn't hear the confusion and worry in my voice.

By the end of third period I had convinced myself it was exactly that, an odd, freaky coincidence, and I had promised myself I would drop it. I did just that, forgetting it and enjoying my day.

At lunch I got several comments on my outfit, by the fourth a blush had a crept up on my cheeks, and Ally found it hysterical.

"Did Alice get to you this morning?" She asked, having met my aunt / sister on several occasions. She grinned when I nodded.

"Well you do look fabulous. Did Jake see you this morning?" She asked, a mischievous look in her eyes. I blushed again, and smirking slightly nodded. She somehow understood perfectly, and busted out laughing, catching the attention of a group of guys a couple tables over.

I internally groaned, as I'm sure she did, when we both noticed Brad making his way over to are table. She outwardly scowled at him, and promptly turned the other way. I really didn't have the patience to deal with him today, and I turned around also, hoping he would take the hint.

"Hey Ness." I heard his preppy voice say behind me, and I sighed, turning around to face him.

"Hello Brad." I said politely, and turned around again.

"Soo, I was thinking since we have such a long vacation coming up you would like to come over sometime? My parents are ganna be away for a while." I could her his pretentious hope, and I sinply couldn't handle it anymore. I turned around, smiling sweetly and watched his face glaze over slightly.

"And what in the hell makes you think I would want to do that?" I saw him glance around, to check and see how many people had heard my responce I'm sure.

"Well I mean, its me. Who wouldn't want to, right Ally." He winked at her head and my blood boiled. He had played and tricked her into sleeping with him, and he had the nerve to bring it up know.

I thought quickly the best way to handle this. I knew with my half vampire side if I touched him I could easily kill him, but I so badly wanted to hit him know. My palms tingled with anger, and I shut them tightly.

"Listen once, cause I'm not going to say this again." I started loudly, catching half the cafeteria's attention.

"I would never, in a million years, want anything to do with you. I have a boyfreind, and you will never be close to half the man he is. And if you ever so much as look at her again, I will send all three of my brother's after you, and I can promise you nobody will find your body." I was nearly yelling now, stepping infront of Ally to prove my point.

His face was red with embarrassment, but there was something else. His cold emotionsless eyes burned with a kind of anger.

"She wanted it, she was begging me for it. Did she not tell you that part? I bet you do to, you dirty whore." He snarled, taking a step forward.

My whole body seemed to fill with rage, but before I could process my options a strawberry blur sprang infront of me, aiming straight for him. Ally smashed into him, knocking him off balance and before he could even see it coming her arm slung back, springing forward and smashing into his face.

The cafe erupted into chaos. His friends sprang up from there table, running forward and I tried to pull Ally up. She had gone down with him, but braced herself for the fall, and hit him again.

One of his buddy's tryd to grab her arm, but I moved forward, knocking into him and he fell back heavily.

"Ally! Stop!" I shouted, reaching for her hand as it swang back. As I lunged forward someone had tried to grab her again, his grip failing and his elbow connecting painfully with my face.

I stumbed back, the wind knocked out of me. Mercifully the teacher's had finally reached are group, fighting through the throng of people and the large gym teacher reached down, easily picking Ally up off of Brad. Her face was bright red with anger, and her fists were balled tightly, her knuckles split open.

"You crazy BITCH! I'll fucking get you for that." Brad screamed from the floor, holding his broken nose that was gushing blood onto his white polo shirt. His left eye was already turning black, and his lip looked split.

Know that I had a clear view of him my vision seemed to blur, reddening around the edges and I lunged forward, my finger nails digging into his arm before another teacher grabbed hold me. I tried to stay rational, if I fought the body holding onto me I would surley kill him. I couldn't do that. So chest heaving and my eyes still burning with anger I didn't fight it.

* * *

A/N: Dont kill me! I had to. This chapter just kept on going and going. I was seriously up to like 7,500 words. So I had to find a stopping point so I could update and give you lovely readers something. This is flowing soo well I should have another ready for you guy's in no Time. Bye the way Im seriously in love with this chapter, so please review and let me know what you guys think! And Bonus Points to anybody that can guess what's ganna happen with Ally and her dreams!


	31. Chapter 31: Christmas Eve Eve

A/N: Alright guys, here it is. I want to seriously thank everybody who commented on the last chapter. Your responses were awsome, and I'm glad you loved it as much as I did. Enjoy.

* * *

Everything after seemed to fly by in a large blur of loud noises, the cafe was cleared out of most students. Brad was in one corner, being checked over by the nurse, but he was shooting nasty glances are way.

Ally and I sat 10 feet apart, at different tables. We were not to speak until the principal and gym teacher, who had been a witness, could get to the bottom of everything.

I froze when I heard the familiar purr of a smooth engine outside. Oh no. This couldn't be happening.

"Did you call my family?" I asked loudly towards the principal. He turned around, a heavy disapproving look on his face.

"Iv called both of your families." Ally looked at me quickly, gulping nervously. Oh shit.

I heard the familiar footsteps of three, and watched desperately as they came around the corner. Grandpa was a calm mask, his eyes sweeping the scene. Dad looked livid, his eyes falling immediately to me, then Ally, then Brad. And Jacob, if possible, looked even beyond livid, his eyes finding me and me alone. He did a quick survey of my body, his eyes landing again on my face. I knew I must have a bruise were someone's elbow had hit me, I felt the tenderness. His eyes sparked, and his hands shook almost violently.

I got up, ignoring the principle's protest and walked swiftly straight to Jake. His arms caught me fiercely, his hands still trembling against my back. I heard grandpa walk over to the group of adults, talking smoothly with them. Dad's hand grazed my head once, a reassuring gesture then followed grandpa.

Jake pulled back, scrutinizing me again and his anger only seemed to grow.

"Who. Did. That." He asked darkly, his eyes on the bruise forming across my cheek.

"That part was an accident, I swear." I said, I wanted to know what was going on, so I took his hand and pulled him over to the crowd of people, holding out my other hand and Ally quickly joined me, taking it.

"Then, weather provoked or not, Miss Anderson attacked Mr Price." The principal Finished, trying to explain the story to a very angered dad.

"Well did anyone hear what was said?" Dad questioned, hearing alot more of the story in are heads. I quickly ran over the whole thing, showing him what had actually happend.

"All I was diong was standing there minding my own business." Started Brad, and I felt my anger flair up again.

"You rotten scumbag liar." I yelled, and Jake actually put his arm around my waist, holding me securely away from the stupid human. I wasn't afraid of hurting him like I was the others, he was stronger then me.

"Your lying and you know it. You called her a whore all cause I turned you down." I said loudly, making sure they all knew the truth.

"You got pissed and called her a whore and said I was to cause I turned you down again! Get it through your thick fucking head, no one want's you." I shouted, leaning forward out of Jake's arms.

"Renesmee that's enough." Grandpa said calmy. I knew he was right, I could feel my anger boiling under my skin, and it frightened me. I wanted to hurt that stupid human boy. I wanted to kill him and make sure he never hurt Ally again.

Just then another car came screeching into the lot, the door slamming and hurried footsteps sounded. Ally's mom came around the corner, her usually gentle eyes and soft expression was transformed into one of worry and anxiety. She walked quickly over to Ally, taking her into her arms.

"What in god's name happend?" She asked quickly, picking up Ally's hands and inspecting her split knuckles.

The principal, who I know realized I had no clue his actual name, try'd reassuring her and glazing over the story. Grandpa stepped forward, talking to her in a much more gentle and reassuring voice. He explained what had happend, even telling her what I said about his words and telling her the truth. She gasped when he got to the part about Ally attacking him, but made sure she knew she was rightly evoked.

"Id be more then willing to bandage her up Lilly, I should really have a look at her hand and make sure there's nothing broken." I noticed how he didn't bother extending the offer to Brad, who had much more injuries then either of us.

She nodded worriedly, her face showing how frightened she was.

"I have to pick up Jonah, then I'm supposed..no, I'll have to do that later." She worried, talking quietly to herself. Ally stepped up, looking guilt and taking her mom's hand.

"Mom, I'm fine. You don't have to worry about me." I knew how she hated causing her mother worry. She had a full plate after her father had died, taking care of both kids and a fulltime job. Grandpa stepped forward again, his face gentle.

"Lilly, if it's alright with you ill take Ally back to the house and do the exam there. I want to chesk Renesmees face anyways." Lilly glanced up at me at his words, seeing my face and walking over towards me. Her delicate hand took my free one.

"What happend dear?" I tried to smile reasuringly, squeezing her hand gently.

"Im okay, it was my fault really. I got in the way."

She was so distraught I started to feel guilty myself, this gentle careing woman was so anxious, scatterbrained over Ally and I's stupid anger.

Her eyes glanced over my face quickly, then nodded and she walked back towards her daughter.

"Go with Dr. Cullen Ally and we'll talk tonight when you get home." She said firmly, and Ally nodded, her eyes downcast.

"Uh..excuse me, but I think we still need to discuss repercussions of these two lady's actions." Said the principal, some what awkwardly.

"Actually Principal Hendricks I would rather discuss what type of policy you permit here, allowing a student to talk to two young female's the way that boy has. I have every right of mind to take this public, and if it wasn't for Renesmee's bestfreind here I might contemplate pulling her from this school. I will set up an appointment after the holiday's to have a meeting about this..incident. until then, good day." Grandpa said firmly, holding his arm out to usher Ally forward and I followed, Jake still holding tightly to my waist.

My eyes flickerd to the corner were I had seen Brad last, but he was gone. I saw dad walk over towards the lunch table we had been sitting at when everything began, and he collected are bags and Jackets. He caugh up quickly to us, handing Ally's hers as she was shivering from the temperature outside.

Dad and grandpa got into the front of the volvo, and Jacob climbed in near the window, with me in the middle and Ally by my side. Jake still had his arm firmly around me, but I reached over, taking her hand. She glanced at me, and for a breaf moment, she grinned. And I grinned to, seeing an arrogant Brad on the floor, with blood staining his stupid polo.

On the way home dad called mom, quickly explaining and letting her know we were on are way back with Ally also. I knew it was a warning, be human.

The rest of the drive was quite, till we pulled up to the house and filed in. The first thing I saw was everybody standing around the sitting room, waiting for us.

Mom rushed over, at a human pace and quickly assessed me. She shook her head, disbelieving in her eyes.

"What happend?" She asked me carefully, and I grabbed her hand discreetly, showing her. She sighed and raised her hand gently to my face, barely resting it apon my skin. The coolness felt immediately wonderful.

Most of the expressions in the room ranged from worried to anxious. Only two others stood out, uncle Jasper stood to the far back, the door slightly open. I remembered then Ally had cut her hand open, and I instantly felt bad for forgetting.

 _Mom, tell uncle Jasper it's okay if he need's to leave. Im alright._ She nodded slightly and I let her hand go. I saw her casually drift off towards him. Besides him Uncle Emmett was grinning.

"I Always knew she would follow in your steps Bella, you both always tried to pick fights." Dad shot him a dark look that clearly said shut the hell up. But when I glanced at Ally she looked unfazed, use to Emmett's cryptic comments.

Grandpa must of snuck upstairs to get his medical bag cause he walked down just then, taking a seat on the sofa and started picking through it.

"Ally come take a seat dear." He patted the spot beside's him. I noticed Jake had yet to let go of me, and when I glanced up uncle Jasper was gone.

I pulled him over to the couch and took a seat, watching grandpa work carefully. She didn't so much as flinch at his cold touche and she looked comfortable in her surroundings. He cleaned up her cuts, deeming them shallow enough not to need stitches, and set out on examing her bones and tendons. She got a overall clean bill of heal, handing her some ointment for the cuts and he covered them carefully.

"Would you two like anything to eat?" Grandma asked, and I relized I never actually got around to eating lunch. My stomach growled at her comment and I saw a faint smile appear on her face. Ally nodded quickly, and she disappeared into the kitchen.

"Alright Ness, your turn." He turned to his other side.

"Really I'm fine. Its just a small bruise." He gave me a pointed look and waited. I sighed and slid over closer. His cool fingers probed my face gently, surrounding the tender tissue. I glanced around to Ally, but she was spacing off, gazing at her hand.

I reached up and touched grandpa's wrist. _How come he hurt me?_ His eyes flitted to Ally also, and he spoke quietly.

"Your still half human, you bruise and hurt, but I don't think it will take long to heal. Maybe a day or two. What hit you?"

 _Some guy's elbow, he was trying to pull Ally of Brad but he slipped._

Grandpa nodded, seeming satisfied fornow.

"Alright Ness, there seems to be nothing broken or fractured. Just alittle bruised." He said louder, and I saw ally jolt out of her day dreams.

"Why don't you go help Esme in the kitchen." Dad said, dismissing us. I rolled my eyes but stood up, glancing down at Jake. He looked back and forth between me and dad, humfed and stood up, joining me.

We walked into the kitchen, but grandma was basically done, a large plate of sandwiched's on the counter, and she was pulling out drink's from the fridge.

We all sat down and began eating. I could tell there was something wrong with Jake, cause he wasn't inhaling his food like usual. He seemed like he was concentrating on something and then I understood, he was ease dropping on there conversation. Dad was telling everybody the whole story, filling in details.

We finished eating and I helped clean up. Jake disappeared into the living room, conversing with the rest of my family. A couple minutes later mom walked in, smiling gently.

"Ally are you ready to go home? Im going to drop you off." She said, and Ally nodded, collecting her things and hugging me.

"Text me." I said, she smiled and headed out the front door.

I could practically see the atmosphere lighted, everybody relax just slightly.

"Renesmee, you understand how serious this situation could of been, don't you?" I sighed, and slumped against the wall.

"I know Grandpa. I didn't mean for it to get so out of hand. But he was out of line, and it's not like I started it. Although I'm kind of glad she did, I was afraid I might." I frowned, recalling that bubbling rage that had filled me.

"You need to control your emotions. Your not a kid anymore and I know you know better. You could of caused serious damage to that human."

"All I did was scratch his stupid worthless arm." I grumbled.

"Well we'll have to see how my meeting with the principal goes before we can determine how much damage has been caused. For know I guess your free to go about your day." He waved his arm around aimlessly.

Slowly the room thinned out, Alice disapering out the door, probably to find Jasper. Rose drifting to the garage, Emmett to the tv. I breifly wondered what I wanted to do.

 _Daddy? Is it okay if I go for a walk with Jake?_ I thought, wanting a private moment with him. I saw his head nod a fraction and I walked over to him, taking his large hand in mine.

 _Come for a walk with me?_

He stood up, silently accepting my invitation and we left out the back door. We walked in silence out into the woods, till I was sure we far away from any family members, and I found a large oak tree that had fallen onto the forest floor. I sat down, pulling my knees up and wrapping my arm's around them. I glanced at him, but he was leaning against a standing tree, and the small space between us felt huge.

"...Jake?" I asked quietly. For some reason I felt nervous, like he was angry at me.

"Your really quiet.." I said, trying to get some response from him. His eyes stayed on me, watching, which only made me feel more anxious.

"Can you say something?" I pleaded.

"What do you want me to say?" He asked, his voice rough and barley concealing something brewing.

"I want you to say that you're not mad at m-me." My voice broke and my throat felt tight, constricted.

"Mad at you?" He pushed away from the tree, his voice growing in volume.

"Why the fuck would I be mad at you?" He asked, taking another step forward. I was frozen, confused by his quick mood swings. I managed to shrug my shoulders. He sighed and taking the couple steps to me, sinking onto his knee's on the forest floor infront of me, his face almost even with mine. I lowered my legs so I could see him.

"Ness. Im quiet cause I'm trying to control my self. I could so easily go find that worthless boy and tear him to pieces." He growled, his eyes on mine.

"He didn't hit me Jake, honestly." He shook his head tho, his hands resting plam down on my thighs.

"Its not just that, you remember yesterday how I told you about that guy on campus that was talking about you?" I nodded, confused.

"Well it was the same guy, as today. Brad or whatever his name is. He must of been visiting or something but after that and then today." His hands started to shake slightly against me and I pressed my palms to his cheeks, sending calming thoughts through him.

"You got hit, weather intentional or not you got hurt and I wasn't there to protect you." His voice cracked and his carefully controlled mask slipped, showing the anger and regret and disappointment.

I felt beyond guilty for getting myself into that situation. I should of just ignored him again, and none of this would of happened. I probably would of, but then Ally went after him and I had to protect her.

"Im sorry that I couldn't control my temper. But Jake you should of heard how he was talking about her. It was wrong, calling her those thing's after what he did.."

"What did he do Ness?" He asked quietly, his carefully controlled mask back in place.

"He's a bad guy. When she was a freshman he played her, tricked her into..sleeping with him. And then today, he brought it up and said that she was asking for it and that I wanted it to."

It was my hands this time that shook with unresolved anger. That scum had no right being on this earth. Let alone anywhere near her or I. He took my hands in his, holding them tightly and his eyes held mine firmly.

"He's not going anywhere near you or Ally. Understand? Well Take care of this." He said firmly. I nodded, the trembling fading slightly and the sudden need to be in his arm's growing stronger.

"Jake.." I whisperd, leaning forward. His arms slid steadily around my waist, pulling me into his chest. I tucked my arms in, engulfed in his heat.

"Come on. Let's get you inside. It's cold out here." He said, stepping back. I wasn't cold, not in the sense he meant. But I did miss his warmth around me with his arm's gone. I frowned but stood, getting ready to walk when he suddenly bent forward and lifted me casually into his arms, cradled against his chest.

He walked back along the path we had come, breaking through the trees and across the lawn. The christmas lights strung around the house twinkled, and I tried to let go out of my bad day. We headed back to the big house, considering it was only around 1. When we got back mom was home, sitting on the couch with dad.

I pulled Jake along with me, sitting down and leaning into him. There was a Christmas movie playing on the flat screen tv.

"How are you feeling?" Mom asked me, her eyes sweeping over my face.

"Im Fine." I reassured her, turning my bruised face away from her.

We stayed at the big house most of the day, enjoying my time spent with my family. Emmett wouldn't shut up about me causeing fights and making jokes all day.

Finally night fell, and after dinner we retreated, slipping out the back door. We walked into his home, closing the door behind me and I heard the faint sound of two footsteps disappearing into the night.

He seemed to pause in the open space between the living room and kitchen, as if debating then headed forward, down the hall. I followed and he sat on the bed, holding his hand out for me.

I took it, welcoming his steady grip. His eyes found mine, contemplative and his hand raised, softly stroking my bruised cheek. His face was sad, disappointed somehow.

This wasn't how this was supposed to be, this morning I was beyond happy and excited to be back home with him, and know I just wanted his good mood back.

I lifted my palm, placing it on his hot cheek and replayed are morning. His eyes staring, unabashed at me. His words, whispered breathlessly against my ear, and his promise for later.

 _My Jacob. Can we please forget about all this and go back._ I thought, showing him my strong desire to ignore my bad day and just be with him.

His brow furrowed and his eyes swept over me, as if trying to find some hidden lie. But there was none, I truly wanted to move past this. I wanted to see that light in his eyes when they saw me, like this morning. The desire plainly written on his face.

 _Please_. I tried again, pleading slightly. He looked torn, between giving me what I so clearly wanted and his desire to protect me.

Finally he nodded once, his hand sliding back into my hair and pulling me forward. His lips were gentle and controlled, his hands falling lightly to my waist. I kissed him back, my arms sliding securely around his neck and I stepped closer.

Slowly I could feel his hesitation and anger ebb away. His hands inched lower on my side's, finding the gap between my top and jeans and slipping underneath.

His lips pressed alittle firmer to my own, growing alittle more insistent.

I pulled back, breathing quickly and trying to get air to my lungs. I tugged lightly at his collor, hoping he would take the hint. His hands left me and he pulled it off, droping it somewhere and he reached out for me again, sliding under the hem to my back and pulling me closer.

When his mouth returned to mine he was more confident, his tongue running over my bottom lip and sliding smoothly into my mouth, tangling passionately with my own. I moaned and allowed my hands to run over his muscled chest, sliding down his abs and back up. I felt them tense under my skin, and he shiverd slightly.

I grinned, loving the affect I had on this strong man. His hands slid further up my back, my soft designer shirt inching up my stomach with his large hands.

I pulled away, stepping just out of reach of his long arms and reached for the hem. His eyes immediately snapped to my torso, and his hands fell to his lap, balling into tight fists. I pulled it up slowly, enjoying my little show for him, and over my head, landing on the floor.

Then I reached down, pulling the little tie on the back of my thight to loosen my boots. They fell slighlty, and I pushed it down, slidding my foot out then the other, leaving them in a pile on the floor.

I stood in my jeans and dark silk bra, the material while comfortable and sexy didn't provide much support, and I knew he could see my body's reaction to him. His eyes swept me hungrily, lingering in places and his hands seemed magneticly pulled to me, reaching outwards.

I stepped into his warm embrace, allowing myself to melt against his strong body. His hands skimmed over my sensitive flesh, not lingering in one place to long, like he couldn't decided wear to start. But I couldn't be allowed to get to distracted, there was something I wanted, a goal for tonight to hopefully move us in the right direction.

I kissed him, my hands resting lightly on his shoulders and I stepped forward, pressing my front to his. I heard a low groan, start from deep in his chest, and took this as a good sign.

 _Lay down?_ I thought tentivly.

He didn't hesitate, kicking off his boots and socks and releasing me. He pulled himself farther up the bed and towards the pillows, moving back to make room for me. I pulled of my socks and crawled up onto the bed, opting to lie myself beside him, and he turned onto his side.

His arm reached out, laying over my waist and resting on my back. I shifted closer, bringing my face inches from his and he grinned wickedly, leaning forward and kissing me. His mouth parted, his heavy earthy scent filling my senses and his tongue expertly dominating mine.

My left arm was pinned between us, but my right hand roamed his skin, down his wide chest, and across his narrow waist, sliding to his back and gripping him to me. His right arm slid under my head, and bending at his elbow, my head trapped close to his. His left hand sliding up my back, under my bra strap and back down, repeating his semi innocent path.

I started to become just slightly nervous as I thought about enacting my plan. Really it wasn't very farther then what we were doing now, but I knew how stubborn he was sometimes.

Pushing it aside, I slid my hand back around his waist, up his chest slowly and felt his muscles contract under my palm. They trailed down, my fingertips just barely brushing his skin. I felt each ripple of his abdomen muscles, gradually moving lower, down his navel.

Casually I let my fingers trail down that wonderful V I'd so often dreamt about. I felt him respond immediately, his hand freezing on my back and his body seemed to sieze, his muscles becoming tout. I tried to ignore his reaction, allowing my hand to skim the hem of his jeans, and come to a rest on his button.

He pulled away sharply, his eyes finding mine questioningly but he was breathing heavy, his chest rising and falling rapidly.

"What-" he started, but I pressed my other palm to him.

 _Shh, I know what your ganna say, but I promise I'm not trying anything to new. I just wanna feel your skin on mine_. I explained quickly, pleading with my eyes and trying to get him to understand.

He looked extremely weary, and nervous, his eyes casting glances around the room like he was expecting dad to pop out at any moment and kill him.

 _Jacob. We're not doing anything wrong.._ I thought, almost regrettablely. This wasn't going the way I wanted.

"H-how..much?" He asked, his voice low and cracking. I thought about his question and demeanor, maybe I shouldn't push him so much at once. I let my finger slip under his waist band, feeling the material still hiding him from me.

 _How about..these can stay on?_ I asked, and I could feel him relax slightly. He nodded, looking relieved.

I moved my hand back to his front, playing slightly with the button. He gulped visibly, and his eyes fell down, watching me. I blushed, but didn't it let it stop me, feeding it back through the whole till it gave. My fingers grasped the tiny zipper, and I felt his hand clutch into a tight fist.

 _You okay?_ I glanced up and his eyes were shut tightly, but he nodded.

I pulled the zipper down, exposing his black boxer briefs. His hand left me, and he turned onto his back, grasping his jeans and pushing them down his thick muscled legs. It wasn't necessarily anything new, I'd seen him multiple times in his boxers but I wasn't planning on letting him put on anything else. He tossed them over the edge, turning back to me and smiling alittle.

"Does that mean I get to do these?" His smile grew, and he reached out, his finger hooking into one of my jean loops and tugging. I grinned at him, loving his growing pleasure at the situation.

"Of course." I said. He grinned like it was already christmas.

"Hmmm..." he said contemplative.

"Stand up." He ordered.

I raised my brows but obeyed, slidding off the bed and standing. He followed, sitting on the edge. He grinned, and leaned over, kissing me gently. I tried to step closer but his hands landed on my waist, restraining me.

He pulled away quickly, his lips trailing to my cheek. I suddenly had a bad feeling he was going to milk this in his favor. They trailed down my jaw, pausing to suck lightly just under and a shaky breath escaped my mouth.

He chuckled once, and continued his path, his tongue darting out every so often. I was nearly panting when they trailed down my chest, between my breast and he paused right before the the middle of my bra. His head turned slightly to the right, his lips finding the exposed skin above the lace of the cup.

He landed a hot open mouthed kiss there but then moved on, pressing one inches lower then his last. He pushed lightly against me and I took a step back, watching as he slid of the bed, landing softly on his knees.

His face was even with my stomach, and for reasons beyond my current comprehension my face flamed scarlet. He leaned forward, his kisses now landing just above my belly button. His hands reached up, settling on my hips.

I was 90 percent positive I was either going to die or collapse in that moment.

He smirked against my skin, and followed his trail, his lips encountered the beginning of my low rise jeans and trailed off to one side, kissing my left hip bone and then my right.

My legs shook almost violently under my own weight, shivers shooting up and down my spine, and I don't think I could ever be more turned on in my life. His eyes flashed up to mine, holding my gaze with his own intense desire filled one and his hands drifted to the front of my pants. With steady hands he popped the button out, pulling my zipper down in one fluid motion.

I felt them loosen around my thighs, sliding down slightly. His hands gathered the material and slid slowly down, pulling one off my foot, then the other.

My breath was loud and harsh, and I was sure they could probably hear it from the big house, but I didn't have a care in the world.

He leaned forward, pressing a hot kiss towards the inside of my upper thigh. I gasped too loud, his head raising quickly and a worried expression on his face.

"Im so-"

"No no, it wasn't..that." I blushed violently, but I didn't want him to think the wrong thing. I let my palm fall to his face.

 _You didn't..do anything wrong..the opposite actually._ I tried to put my jumbled emotions into coherent thoughts.

"Good?" He smirked slightly, and all I could do was nod vaguely, my eyes sliding shut trying to gather my brain. I felt his hot kiss again, on my other thigh and a breathy moan slipped from my parted mouth.

He groaned, the vibrations shooting through my sensitve body and I shudderd.

"I love your s-" but he cut off suddenly, his eyes glancing around nervously again.

 _You love my what?_ I question, distracted. But he stood up slowly, leaning in close to my ear.

"Later, when were alone." He breathed quietly. I nodded because I didn't think I could handle anymore in that moment without jumping him. He watched me for a minute, seeming satisfied with himself, then pulled me back to the bed.

He got in first, following his earlier position and I cuddled up close to him. His chest pressed firmly to mine and are feet tangled under the blankets, but like always there was a careful distance between are hips.

 _Why do you do that?_ I wondered, growing sleepy.

"Do what?" He asked in a husky low voice.

I thought about how he always kept a safe distance between himself and I and showed him what I was thinking.

"Oh." He said, shocked.

 _Hmm?_

"I didn't think you noticed." He said honestly. I laughed once.

 _Of course I noticed, I'm not naive Jake. I know what happens. In fact I think I'd be a little worried if you didn't get one when your with me like this_. I think I actually giggled, reaching the point of over tired.

"I just, don't want to make you uncomfortable."

I looked up, raising my eyebrow and rolling my eyes.

 _Nothing you do makes me uncomfortable, especially that. I love feeling you. All of you. Some day soon I will feel all of you_. I thought, settling back down against him.

He was quiet, weather he was falling asleep or thinking over my words I wasn't sure, but he moved then, scooting closer and straightening out his body, pulling me flush against him. I smiled lazily when I felt his hard erection press firmly to my thigh.

 _I love you my Jacob. Every single part_. I registered his arms holding me tighter before I drifted off.


	32. Chapter 32: Author's Note

A/N :

Okay guys. Here's my dilemma, i have almost the whole next chapter done, which is ganna be over 5,000 words. But i have a tiny bit of writer's block. I have everybodys christmas gift written, but for the life of me i can't figure out what Ness wants to get Jacob. So anybody who wants to throw in a comment, is so much appreciated. If I can get one today I will the whole chapter up bye tonight!

Leave your comments on what she should get him!


	33. Chapter 33: Christmas

A/N: So abvously I want to thank everybody who responded to my last Author's Note. You Guys were awsome, and i loved every suggestion. So without further waiting. Enjoy!

* * *

I awoke the next morning, still wrapped tighly in my Jacob's arms. He was flat on his back, with me sprawled carelessly on him. I peered out the big window to my right, finding the sill outside and beyond coverd in white fluffly snow. It was still falling enchantingly down, swirling in the morning air. I smiled at the pretty flakes, it was going to be a white christmas.

I turned my attention back to the man under me. It took my slow brain a few extra seconds to register how much of my own skin was touching his. I felt my cheeks slighlty flush as I rememberd the night before. It had been relatively easier then I thought, although I had started my plan with the assumption I would be wearing less then I currently was. But, I reminded myself, we would have time later, once in la push.

I attempted to slid my hands down towards the bed and lift myself off him, but I hadn't so much as moved an inch when his arm's tighten, holding me closer.

"Where do you think your going?" He whisperd, his voice deep and gravelly.

I looked up to his face, and his eyes were blinking rapidly against the bright light, opening finally and finding mine. I felt my cheeks grow warm again, and he grinned.

"No where."

His smile slid slowly of his face, replaced with some other emotion. His arm lifted, bringing the blanket with it. I felt the cool air creep under, releasing some of my warmth. His eyes peered over my head, looking at something and then back, his arm dropping.

"Mmm, I thought it was just a dream." He said lazily, his hand sliding down my back and landing on my ass. I laughed, shaking my head.

"No, but I'm sure my family is waiting for us." I reminded him. It was Christmas eve, and with no school I was sure they wanted my attention.

"They can wait a couple more minutes." He said, his hands slid to waist, gripping gently and lifting me higher up his body, settling on his chest. His lips immediately found mine, and his hands roamed over my skin.

I sighed happily, my arms wrapping around his neck, my hands sliding through his short silky hair. I heard a sort of rumble start from deep in his chest, and it remimded of a cat's purr. I laughed, pulling away and looking at him.

He looked content, a small smile on his lips. He shrugged, one hand falling to my thigh and gripping it slightly. He pulled up, sliding me more firmly over him till both my legs where straddled over his hips.

In just my panties and his boxers I could feel him so much more then I ever have. And I could feel him now, grow hard and firm under me, nestled inbetween my legs. My eyes widened, peering down at him.

His eyes held mine, almost curiously. He didn't look embarressed or sorry, just watched my face for a reaction. So I tried to ignore my shock, rather I smiled at him, sliding my hands down to his chest.

 _I Love you. All of you._ I reminded him, relaxing ontop of him. I knew we had to go soon, so I didn't provoke him anymore.

I saw his grin light up his face, his hands landing on my hips and pulling me closer. I bit my lip, holding in any sounds but my back arched slighlty, and I heard him chuckle.

 _Alright, now your being cruel. We have to go._

He groaned slightly but nodded, letting me go. I climbed off him, sliding of the bed and streching. When I glanced back he hadn't moved, his arm was stretched out on the bed and the covers pulled down to his legs. I tried to ignore the obvious tent in his boxers but my face reddened, and I heard him laugh.

I opened the dresser, grabbing his shirt and threw it at him. It smacked into his face, cutting him off mid laugh. When it fell down I stuck my tongue out at him, and turned around.

I heard the bed creak slightly, and his soft footsteps approached. His hands slid around my waist, settling on my stomach and pulling me back into him, his still prominent erection pressing against my ass. I breathed heavily as I searched the draw for a shirt, pulling it out, but his hand caught it, and he leaned down.

"You should probably shower." He said quietly, taking the shirt and dropping it back into the draw.

"Im not doing anything, just hanging out. Im fine." I responded. I felt his head shake, and he leaned closer, his mouth centimeters from my ear.

"Not why I said it." He whisperd. I let my palm fall to his hand still on my stomach.

 _Then why?_ I heard him exhale loudly, a slighlty pained sound.

"I can smell you." He breathed out the words, barely an audible sound.

 _What do you mean?_ I knew I didn't smell bad, I showered yesterday and it's not like I was doing anything.

His other hand returned to my stomach, his fingers light. They moved slowly, softly trailing down till they ran seductively over the lace of my panties. I gasped in a tiny breath, my head swimming and my leg's felt weak.

"I mean..I can smell your desire." He breathed again, his lips ghosting against my ear, sending a shiver down my spin. His fingers moving toward the edge, down my hip and following the crease where my leg and hip met.

His words seemed to trickle like molasses, slow and sweet into my brain. Until I gasped and whirled around, my back to the dresser and my hands landing on his chest.

"What?!" I said, to loudly. His face showed his confusion and concern, his eyes darting to the door. I tried to remember that we had to be very quiet or they could hear.

 _Are you serious?_

His brow furrowed, his hands resting lightly on my back, and he nodded once. I felt my face flame a deep red.

 _H-how..often_? Even in my own thoughts I could feel the embarrassment seeping out of me and into him.

"Probably always." He shrugged. I looked away, trying to find a response but all I could think was how humiliating it was.

I ducked under his arm, and into the bathroom, walking over to the shower and turning the knob, listening to the water pounding onto the floor. I heard the door click shut and was suprised to find him standing in the room. He took a couple steps in my direction, grabbing hold of my hand and pulled me to the counter. He reached for me and effortlessly lifted me, sitting me down besides the sink and his hands cupped my cheeks, forcing my face directly infront of his.

"What's wrong?" He asked, his voice still low but I knew over the water and distance it wouldn't carry.

"Nothing." I said, and even to my own ears it sounded unconvincing. My eyes still avoided his, but he wasn't having it.

"Renesmee, look at me." I felt my mind respond to him, to his alpha voice. It didn't matter that I wasn't a wolf. I was his imprint, his mate and it affected me just as much as the others. My eyes settled on his, dark and searching.

"What's wrong.." he asked again. Between his eyes and the fading alpha tone I was helpless to disobey him. I let my hands rest on his waist, feeling my connection open to him.

 _I didn't know you could...tell_. I thought, struggling with my emotions.

"I got that part, but why does it matter honey?" He asked gently, his voice growing softer till it was just his own.

 _I..it's just..embarrassing._

"Because I can tell?" He questioned. I nodded once.

"Okay, let me ask you this. My physical reaction to you, you can tell right?" He asked. Confused on what he was trying to accomplish, I nodded.

"You feel it, and see it. Should I be embarrassed about that?" He asked, raising his eyebrows.

 _No Jake, of course not. I love your reaction to me_.

"Then why baby, are you." He asked softly, his thumbs stroked my cheeks and I felt the slight soreness from yesterday. My mind went blank, trying to connect the dots from his words.

 _I..don't know_..He smiled alittle, moving closer till his nose almost touched mine.

"I love you Ness, every single part. I love when you moan my name when I kiss your neck, or how you always want to feel me against you. I love your skin on mine, and I fucking love the way you smell when your turned on. It drives me crazy, knowing your wet and ready for me. I want you so much, I want to feel all of you, and taste every single inch of you, and when I do, because I promise I will, I will love every second of it, and there's nothing about that, that you should ever feel embarrassed about."

His words rushed over me, stroking something deep in the pits of my stomach, igniting that burning need for him. For once my cheeks didn't blush, because he was right. One day I would know every part of him from memory, would know exactly how it felt to have him over me, and under and inside. So did it really matter now, that he knew how very much I desired him? Absolutely not.

I breathed deeply, pulling air into my aching lungs, slid my hands up his neck, pulling him into me till his lips crashed into my own. I felt him grin, but only kissed him harder, sliding forward on the counter and wrapping my legs around his waist.

He pulled back, breaking my tight hold on him but he had a large smile on his face. His hands fell to my thighs, sliding up dangerously close to my aching need for him.

"As much as I would love to prove my point even more...I think I should leave and let you shower." He whisperd, his forehead coming to a rest on mine. I didn't have the heart or will power to move, but I nodded slightly.

His hands slid around, to the undersides of my legs and he stepped back, holding me up and against him. He walked back towards the shower, lowering me down till my feet touched the cool tiles. Hot steam was billowing out over the top of the shower door, filling the room. He held me till my legs could function properly, then gave me one gentle kiss, and stepped back, leaving the room, the door closing behind him.

It was several moments before I could make myself move. I stripped, leaving them in the hamper and stepping into the shower. I took my time washing my hair and body, being thorough. I was working the conditioner into my long locks when I heard the door open, and his footsteps enter the room.

"Alice demanded I bring these to you, and that you wear them." He called, his voice sounding exasperated. I laughed, but imagined how bad it could be.

"What is it?" I called.

"Uh, pjs? I think.." He sounded very unsure and I gigled.

"Okay. Im almost done." I turned around, rinsing the conditioner from my hair. I ran my hands through it, making sure I got it all, and savoring the last of the warmth from the hot water.

I heard the door click shut just as I turned the water off, and stepped out. There was a pile of clothes on the counter, just where 30 minutes ago my butt had been. I smirked and took the large towel hanging on the door down, wrapping it around me myself. It wasn't there before, so he must of hung it up for me.

I dried off, wrapping the towel around my hair and walked over to the clothes. I pulled on the bra and underwear, a soft cotton material, with no underwires and a large elastic band under the torso. I picked up the next article, it was a long sleeve soft shirt, white with the word Cullen embroidered on the back. I pulled it on, and reached for my pants. They were black, with a much more festive pattern. Little christmas trees were scatterd around every few inches. I rolled my eyes but laughed and pulled them on.

I hung up my towel, grabbed my brush and walked into the bedroom. Jake was in the middle, pulling a shirt over his head. I stopped and not being able to help myself laughed. He was in a similar outfit, except his shirt read Black across the back.

"She got to you to huh?" He turned around, and grinned.

"Yup, and I'm going to be seriously outnumberd as the only Black in the house." I reached for him, looping my arm's around his back.

"Ill protect you." He smirked, copying my position.

"I can handle it, besides, one day your going to be a Black, ill let them have you for now." I felt my heart take off at his words, and leaned up to kiss him.

"You better get me a shirt when that day comes around." I said, stepping back.

"Yes ma'am." I laughed and went to pull on some socks. I brushed through my hair quickly, pulling it back with a hair tie and slipped on my shoes.

"Ready?" He nodded and took my outstretched hand.

We walked outside, and I took in are surrondings. The white blanket coated everything, the Christmas lights shimmering underneath. We made a path to the big house and I pulled him inside, shaking the snow out of my hair and stepping out of my shoes.

"Its about time! We where beginning to worry you guys got snowed in." Emmett's loud voice shouted across the room, and I rolled my eyes.

"Were 10 feet away you big head." I retorted.

I glanced up, and everybody seemed scatterd around the large open room, each in there respective Cullen shirts and pants. I noticed that each couple had a different pattern on there bottoms tho.

"Oh, then what took you so long?" He shot back, a devilish look in his eyes.

"None of your buisness nosy." I snapped. Jake stepped forward, cutting of my line of vision.

"Im hungry." He declared, and took my hand, leading me to the kitchen.

Esme was already inside, mixing a big bowl with the smell of bacon coming from behind her.

Most of the day was spent in holiday cheer and freindly banter. We had breakfest, then hung around, talking with some and playing games with others. Uncle Emmett got a slice of tomato thrown at his head during lunch when he started making comments about are upcoming trip, asking Jake if Billy was a light sleeper. While everybody laughed at Emmett's disgusted face, I took Jake's hand.

 _Is he?_

I saw him grin, and wink and I laughed also.

We had a spectacular ham meal for dinner, with a wide variety of sides. After I was thoroughly stuffed we migrated to the couch, turning to the christmas classics.

We made it throught a Christmas Story, Elf, The Nightmare Before Christmas, and The Grinch before I felt myself slipping into unconsciousness. I was beyond content, curled up in my loves arms, surrounded by my family.

I was confused when I blinked my eyes open, trying to grasp my surrondings. I was sprawled out on the couch, my head resting on Jacob's chest. I peered around, trying to gather what time it was. The tv was off, but there was faint light coming from the windows. The christmas tree shone bright from the corner, presents spilling hazardly from underneath.

I pushed myself up into a sitting position, stretching and yawned. I was alittle stiff, but that was probably from falling asleep on the couch. I got up, making my way down the hall beside's the kitchen and into the bathroom. After using the restroom I washed my hands, splashing cool water on my face.

I still had a slight discoloration to my right cheek bone, but it was probably something a human couldn't make out. I headed out back to the living room, sitting on the couch and leaned over Jake's torso. I kissed his cheek, waiting till it registered and his eyes flutterd open before I kissed his mouth.

"Merry Christmas." I whisperd, his eyes floated around the room, confused just I had been. But he seemed to come to his conclusion quicker then I did and he smiled.

"Hey." He said, his voice cracking and he lifted himself up alittle, leaning against the cushions.

"Morning, and merry christmas baby." He leaned towards me, his face expectent. I kissed him again, leaning into his side.

"MERRY CHRISTMAS." Emmett's booming voice reverberated thoughout the whole house. Beyond used to his anoyying habbit of being loud and abnoixous I ignored him.

"Stop kissing so we can open presents!" He hollard again. I didn't bother pulling away, just raised my hand and gave him a one fingerd salute.

"Renesmee." I heard dad's voice scold me and finally moved, looking over the back of the couch. Him and mom were halfway down the stairs, stopped only by Emmett at the bottom.

"Im hurt." He dramatically clutched his chest, over his dead heart and staggered down the rest of the steps. I rolled my eyes at his show, but slid back towards Jake, his arms encirceling me.

"He started it." I said defensively.

"Yes we know dear, we all heard it." Grandma's voice floated in from down the hall, her and grandpa emerging from there room.

"I was just trying to-"

"Emmett enough, we all know what you were trying to do." Rose cut him off, coming up from the garage. His face crumpled into a sad face, and he pouted. Grandma walked over towards him, taking his large hands in hers.

"Why don't you come help me in the kitchen, then we can do presents?" She asked him and he visibly cheered, following her. Rose rolled her eyes, she watched him go, a strong look of love in her eyes, no matter how annoying and abnoixous he was she still loved him.

Alice and Jasper joined right after he had left, floating down the stairs and into the room. Alice folded her tiny self onto the floor, and Jasper leaned against the arm of the couch.

Mom and dad came around to the couch, and she bent over, kissing my forhead lighly.

"Goodmorning." She smiled, taking a seat besides me. Dad copied her, kissing the top of my head and sat, pulling mom back into him.

"How'd you sleep?" He asked. I shrugged.

"Fine, but whyd you leave me on the couch?" I questioned. He laughed.

"I attempted to move you but you wouldn't let go of Jake. So rather then wake either of you we just left you there." I blushed alittle, but knew he was probably right.

"EWWWW, WHAT IS THAT?" I heard Emmett squeal from the kitchen, and I turned my head, looking over the couch into the wide doorway. I saw grandma holding a bowl, but she was leaning over it, laughing so hard I thought it might fall.

Emmett was holding a piece of bacon inbetween two fingers, dangling it like was a dead rat, and inspected it.

"IT'S SLIMY." He yelled, flinging his finger trying to get it off.

Everybody's head turned, taking in the scene. Some started to laugh, only mom looked slightly worried, getting up and hurrying over to him.

"There there Emmett, it wont hurt you. It's just bacon, here give it to me and I'll help Esme." I could see her fight to keep the smile off her face, peeling the bacon of his finger and patting his huge bicep. He looked worried as he nodded, and muttering to himself started to walk back towards us.

"Slimy.." I heard, before he plopped onto the chair near the christmas tree and looked up towards us. I could feel Jacob shake with laugher behind me, but he was silent.

"Did the dead pig scare you Emmett?" He asked serously, before erupting into loud laughter.

"Fuck off." Emmett growled.

"What have I said about swearing Emmett." Dad said, throwing him a dark look.

"She's a grown up, its not like she doesn't hear it from him." He said, his arm extending out to Jake and he sounded defensive.

"I do not! I know how to be a gentleman." Jake said quickly, grabbing a pillow near his elbow and chucking it square at his face. He caught it right before it hit him, lowering it to his lap.

"Gentleman my ass. I saw you this morning." He exclaimed.

"Oh shut up, it was just a kiss." He rolled his eyes, anoyyed.

"Ya, just a kiss now. Until your all the way in forks unsupervised." He challenged. I felt a growl rumble in his chest, threatening to escape.

"For the last time, I didn't plan it." He said, his voice growing angered.

"Oh I bet, its always the woman who plan the assault." He grinned and winked at Jake. The room broke out into multiple noises. I heard the growl escape Jake's chest, threatening.

"Watch it!" Dad yelled at Emmett, reminding him I'm sure that he was infact talking about his daugher.

Uncle Jasper had stood up quickly, taking the pillow from Emmett's hands and smacking it into his face.

"Shut up you idiot." He said, returning to his spot.

"Emmett, that's enough." Grandpa said calmy, and miraculously he listened, slumping back into the chair and pouting again, only this time he was covered in feathers from the busted pillow.

Rose walked over, sitting on his lap and leaned back into him. He seemed mildy happier.

"Breakfest is ready!" Grandma called.

I grinned when I heard Jacob's stomach growl loudly, and I got up, taking his hand and leading him into the kitchen.

Jacob devoured his plate of eggs, bacon and toast quickly, picking at mine till I finshed and pushed the rest towards him. I laughed when I heard Emmett sigh loudly from the other room, and grandma smiled, putting away dishes.

"You know, its still pretty early, maybe we should take a nap before presents?" I said, louder then necessary and had to stiffle a giggle when I heard his groan.

"Nesssieee." Emmett whined, and I grinned. Jake laughed, sliding my empty plate away and standing up, taking my hand.

"Come on, before he starts crying." He grinned and pulled me back to the couch, sitting in the corner and pulling me onto his lap. I breifly glanced at my parent's faces but they didn't seem botherd so I leaned back into him, cuddled against his strong chest.

The rest of my family joined us on the cushions. Grandpa the patron he is stood by the tree, waiting for everybody to settle in.

"Is everybody ready?" He asked, and I saw Emmett beam happily.

He reached down, picking up some beautifully wrapped presents and passing them out. One of Jacob's arms wrapped over me, his hand reaching around to take his present, his other slid around my waist, his hand falling to my lap.

I took the shiny wrapped present he handed me, and my christmas excitement growing I read the tag. To: Nessie. From: Rosalie and Emmett.

Jake had a similarly wrapped one, with the same paper, only his was addressed to Fido. I raised my eyebrow at him but he only grinned and shook his head.

We unwrapped them, tearing through the paper easily. I unveiled a brandnew Iphone s6, in a pretty rose gold.

"Thank you, I was just thinking the other day I should probably upgrade mine." I said honestly, giving them a genuine smile. Jake had the same phone, but in silver.

"Wow Blondie. Im touched." He flashed her his best smile.

"Your both welcome." She said, unwrapping one of her own. I watched as they all opened one, going around the room and seeing what everybody got.

Next I unwrapped an ancient leather bound book from grandma and grandpa. It weighted a ton, its pages yellowing slightly and I stared in awe.

"It's one of the oldest collections of short stories known to man kind. I acquired it from my own father when I was still human." Carlisle explained, and I gaped openly at him.

"Shouldn't this be in a museum or something?" He chuckled, but shook his head gently.

"Oh no, men tend to destroy such treasures. Beside's, books were meant to be read, not locked behind glass cases."

I gently put it aside, making a mental note to get some type of protector for it. I accepted a larger wrapped box this time, reading the tag first.

From: Alice and Jasper. To: Renesmee. I lifted the lid, and after digging through a load of tissue paper found a smooth leather handle. I pulled it up, revealing a designer bag. It was black leather, with pale gold accents and a silky interior liner.

"Oh Alice, its gorgeous. Thank you so much!" I knew she must of searched relentlessly that was something more my style, and in honesty it was, I love it.

She beamed from her seat on the floor, clapping her hands excitedly.

The next present was smaller, wrapped in an elegent gold pattern. There was a small bow, and a tag that read To: Renesmee. From: Mom and Dad. I unwrapped it carefully, producing a small velvet box. I opened it slowly, taking in the delicate ring nestled between satin. It was silver, with a wide band and the face was the Cullen family crest. I stroked it, mesmerized by the ancient coat of arms.

"This is mine?" Mom looked at me, her smile gentle and loving.

"Of course, we all have one. And you'll always be a cullen." She winked, taking dad's hand.

I was slightly shocked. Of course I was a cullen. But unlike the rest of my family I was the only one truly born into the name, and I'd always felt alittle out of place because of it. I handed Jacob the box, climbing of his lap and quickly taking the few steps towards them, hugging them both. Mom laughed, and stroked my hair.

When I pulled back I went straight to the tree, picking up a carefully wrapped envelope and handing it to them. I curled back into his lap, holding my box to my chest.

"What's this?" Dad asked, looking at the envelope. I laughed.

"Its a present. Your suppose to open it silly. Its from me and Jake." I told them, holding his hand tightly. I just hoped they like it.

Mom pulled it out of his shocked hands, I guess he wasn't use to being suprised, and carefully opened it. She pulled out the document, reading it over quickly. Her eyes flashed to dad's, who was reading over her shoulder.

"I know I kinda ruined your first one, and I know you guys would never make the decisions for yourself. But you deserve to go, and iv already talked to grandpa and made sure it was okay." I told them, squishing any reason they might think to use.

"What is it?" Emmett asked anoyyed.

"Tickets. Plane tickets for Rio." She said, rereading the paper.

"Ness, are you sure your okay with this?" Dad asked. I laughed, reaching forward and took his hand.

"Of course daddy, I'm a big girl now, I can take care of myself. I think you guys deserve a second honeynoon. Just try not to bring home any surprises this time." He smiled back, and squeezed my hand.

"Best suprise ever. Thank you honey." Mom said.

I grinned, happy that I could make them so happy. I really hadn't done much, grandpa said it was fine for them to use the island, and Jacob paid for the tickets.

"And thanks Jake. Really." She said, smiling over at her once best freind.

"No problem Bells, it was all Nessie's idea." He said, looping an arm around my waist.

The other couple presents were passed out among members, and grandma started picking up all the wrapping paper.

Subtle for them everybody seemed to quietly drift off, leaving me and Jacob alone in the living room. I turned around to face him, giving him my best smile.

"I guess that means it's my turn."

I slipped out of his arm's, getting up and walking to the tree. I picked up the last gift, hidden towards the back and went back to the couch. I sat down facing him, tucked my legs under me and silently held my hand out.

His face burned with curiosity, but he was almost hesitant to take the small wrapped present.

"What is it?" He questioned, his eyes finding my own. I grinned.

"Open it and you'll find out." He smiled briefly, but stared at the box as thought he was trying to see thru it.

His snail pace made me nervous, my hands twisting together on my lap. He pulled one edge free, slowly tearing it to the other.

What if he didn't like it? Or maybe it wasn't a good enough present..

He pulled off the loose wrapping, exposing the flat long box. I held my breath, the tension building, why was this so nerve recking?

He opened the lid, peering into it and his eyes swept over the item. I watched as he pulled out, resting on his palm and raised it, inspecting it.

"I uh. I called Seth, and I asked him to tell me how you guy's made them. He said it was pretty complicated but he sent some video's of himself diong it and it took a bit to get the hang of it. Im sure you could do a much better job.." I said, explaining what he held in his hands. I had always loved my promise bracelet, even when I grew to big to wear it, it was a treasured object.

"You made this?" He asked, his eyes finding mine and shining brightly.

"Ya, I did. I added a clasp to yours tho, its magnetic, so if you phase with it on it will just fall off and not break." I was pretty proud that I had come up with that idea.

It had taken day's of practice to finally get the technique right. I had made Jacob's bracelet from dark leather and a forest green thick rope type of material. It was woven in an intricate Quileute promise pattern.

"Do you like it? I know it's not a big present but..I though since I have mine, and my necklace, that you should have something to." I slid a little closer, pressing my palm to his warm cheek.

 _Something that reminds you everyday, that I love you, and I'm yours for the rest of eternity. For now a promise will have to suffice._

I pulled my hand back, watching his face break into a heart stopping smile and he reached for me, pulling me onto his lap.

"I love it, and you. Your both perfect." He said sincerely, his eyes on me then he leaned forward and kissed me.

My hands tangled in his silky hair, and pulled him closer. His arms wrapped tightly around me, his torso flush with mine.

The faint noises reminded me we were still in the big house, my family scattered around. I pulled away slowly, leaning my forehead against his and trying to catch my breath. His dark eyes held mine, his gaze intense and his hand raised to cradled my face.

"Thank you." He whispered.

"Your welcome." I leaned away, reaching for his hand that still held his bracelet. I took it, looping it around his big wrist and listened to the click of the magnet. The earthy colors looked perfect with his russet skin, blending in.

"Now. Do you want yours?" He asked, grinning and his hands slid to my waist, lifting me up and off him, and stood up, taking my hand. He started to lead me forward, but went left, around the couch.

"Where is it?" I asked as he lead me away from the christmas tree, and down the hall slighly to the garage door.

"You'll see." He grinned and opened the door, letting me go first. I headed down the steps to the sunken garage, flipping on the lights as I neared the last step and turning towards the open space.

There was the usual line of shiny cullen cars, along with Jake's and his motorcycle. On the other side however, was a strange combination of things. There was a carefully collected pile of parts, and beside that was what looked like a completely bare frame, with a shiny green bow on the handle bar.

"I don't understand." I said honestly, walking closer and inspecting it. Maraciliously instead of being offended he just laughed.

"I kinda figured. It doesn't make much sense now, but it will. Do you remember when I was building my bike? You begged Edward to ket you ride it and you were so disappointed when he wouldn't let you.. Well I finally talked him into letting you, as long as we get you protective gear. And rather then let you ride mine, I thought we could build your own." He said happily, looking over the parts.

I let his words register in my brain. So not only was I allowed to finally learn to ride, but I was going to get my own bike?

"So this is real? I can actually ride it when it's done?" I asked, scientism in my voice.

"Yes." He said chuckling.

"It take's a bit to build. But I thought it would be a good project for us. I know how it works, and we can do everything to your own liking. It will be a hundred percet custom bike for you. Those parts are just a couple standerd ones to get us started." He explained, and the excitement was bubbling up in me.

Grinning I turned towards him, jumping with my vampire reflexes but he caught me easily. I wrapped my arms tightly around his neck, my legs around his waist and his hands held me firmly to him on my back.

"I love it. Thank you thank you thank you." I punctuated each word with a kiss, my palms open and showing him my gratitude.

I kissed him for a while, ignoring the sound of my family upstairs till I heard a very directed throat clear and Jacob pulled back, his eyes darting to the ceiling. I rolled my eyes but started to untangle myself from him.

 _We leave tomorrow my Jacob._

I reminded him and he grinned, letting me go. We made are way back upstairs, ignoring uncle Emmett's smirk and found mom and dad back on the couch. I leaned over the back, kissing his cheek.

"Thank you daddy." He smiled, but didn't look to pleased all the same. Mom was more relaxed, a slight smile on her face.

"You welcome honey. Just please please be careful." He said, eyeing Jake with a threatening look.

"I will." I said, ignoring it. I heard a low grumble and turned, laughing at Jake's sheepish smile.

"Hungry?" I asked him. I saw his eyes sweep over me, and land back on mine. I felt my blush creep up my face, and my eyes narrowed at him dangerously.

"Yup." He grinned. I took his hand, heading for the kitchen.

 _Your a tease._

I saw his grin grow bigger, and his eyes landed sidesays, over me again.

I tried to ignore him while I made us lunch, serving him left over pasta from the other day and heating up a plate of my own.

We spent the rest of are day much like yesterday. Jokeing and talking and laughing. Emmett was relatively behaved on the jokes about me and Jake, and I noticed twice Jasper staring at him very fixedly, and wondered what he was making him feel.

We all gatherd for dinner, with me and Jake being the only one's to eat but had a fun family meal all the same. We stayed longer then usual, I figured since we would be leaving tomorrow we would spent as much time as possible. When the moon had long since come out and I could see Jake fighting his eyelids, I stood, announcing it was bed time for the part humans.

We wished everybody goodnight and made a path back through the snow. We walked into our little home, kicking off our shoes and getting the snow out of my socks. I made my way to the room, while Jake put are presents down on the kitchen counter, then joined me, wear he promptly collapsed ontop of the bed, burying his head in the pillows.

"What time are we getting up tomorrow?" I asked, started to untie the string at my waist, letting my bottoms fall.

"If we want to be there before night fall we should leave by 8." He said, his voice muffled by the pillow.

"Okay, I'm ganna take a shower." I said and pulled my top over my head. When I glanced up his face was turned towards me, his eyes raking over my body.

"What are you diong that for. Come here." He said, his words dripping with desire. I grinned but shook my head, stepping back.

"Nope. If I shower now I get to sleep in tomorrow, and if I join you on that bed I won't be going anywhere." I laughed, stepping towards the bathroom door.

He pouted, sitting up slightly and started yanking his shirt off. I watched it move over his muscles, exposing more of his perfect body. He leaned back, his hands losening the string then began pulling them down his hips, he kicked them off, stretching out ontop of the bed in his boxer breifs. I let my eyes roam over him, his strong stomach, his muscled thights. God how I wanted him.

I released a shaky breath, and tried to tell myself I couldn't jump him now. My family was still to close. I forced my legs to move, into the bathroom and pushed the door forward, leaving it open a crack. I did it mostly to tease him, maybe alittle to invite him.

I stripped, stepping into the shower and washing quickly. I got out and wrapped the towel around me, then started collecting my shower supplies and left them on the counter for tomorrow. One less thing to find and pack.

I towel dried my hair, running a brush throught it and pulled the door open, shutting off the light. It was dark in the room, the moonlight shining in illuminating his figure.

"Jake?" I whispered, walking to the dresser.

"Mmm." He groaned quietly and I gigled.

"Just seeing if you were up." I whisperd again, and pulled open the draw. I let my towel fall, making a soft thump on the ground and started looking for panties.

"Well fuck I am now." I heard his husky whisper and laughed. I pulled them on, and picked out a short loose tank top, and pulled that on.

I turned around and he was watching me, his eyes lustfull but still slighly drooped. I climbed into the bed, and he immediately reached out for me. His arm slid under my head, supporting and the other tucked under the hem of my shirt, smoothing up my back, his skin hot on mine.

He pulled me flush to his body, his face inches from mine. I cuddled closer, my arm around his waist, and I slid my leg over his hip, feeling his erection press into me.

His hand slid down my back, over my hip and followed my leg over him. His fingers brushed towards the underside of my thigh and trailed back up, skimming the edge of panties and slipping under, his big hot hand covering my bare skin.

He groaned, and his hand flexed, pulling my hips closer towards his. I leaned up and caught his mouth with mine, quickly loosing any sense of responsibility I might of previously had.

He was the one to pull away a couple minutes later, his hand relaxing slighly and his eyes finding mine. They held a promise, for another night, far away from here and I felt myself nod slightly, silently agreeing. His hand slid out from my panties, up over my hips and following my waist. It rested there, his thumb brushing the underside of my breast and I sighed, cuddling closer and closing my eyes.

"Goodnight my Ness." He whisperd, kissing my forehead.

 _Goodnight my Jacob_. I though, drifting to sleep in his arms.

* * *

A/N: So really all i want to say here is that i know the cullen crest technically wasn't in the books, it was only in the movies i believe, but i loved the idea of it and it fit in perfectly, so I'm ganna roll with it haha


	34. Chapter 34: Journey

A/N: I want to thank you all for being so patient. Im sorry this chapter took so long, and Im hoping the next goes alot smoother. Enjoy.

* * *

The excitement bubbled in me that morning as we were getting ready to leave. We would get to see all are family, all of Jake's pack members and grandpa Charlie. On top of that was the chance to be alone with Jake, besides his dad who slept like the dead, it would be just us.

I had a giant smile on my face all morning, making sure I had everything packed. Then making sure Jacob hadn't missed anything and packing his.

We said goodbye to everybody, made sure they would feed and water are baby's while we were away and ignoring Emmett's not so subtle innuendos and Rosalie's scowling at the back of Jake's head. Finally we were in my Tesla, Jake said he didn't want to put to many miles on his precious dodge, and speeding down the main road out of town.

I waited about twenty minutes, until I knew I was far away from daddy's extended hearing, then leaned my head back and laughed. The high of getting away from my large overprotective, no privacy family was coursing through me. I loved each and everyone one of them with all my heart, but sometimes it was just to much.

I heard Jake join in, laughing at me I'm sure but I didn't care. I was to excited for are little vacation. I looked over, and was right, he had his biggest Jacob smile and while he was facing forward I could see his eyes dart to me every couple seconds.

"Are you happy?" He asked, looking at me.

I twisted alittle in my seat, tucking my leg's under me and leaning over the center console. I let my hand fall to his lap, resting on the top of his thigh. I briefly considered showing him, but we were alone, which rarely happend, so I decided to speak outloud.

"I am, completely and absolutely beyond happy right know. We had a great Christmas, were going to see Grandpa and Billy and everybody and I get you, almost completely alone for a whole week. There's nothing else that could make me more happy right know." I said, trying to express my feelings. His face practically glowed, a huge smile lighting it and his eyes held so much emotions.

"I bet I could top it." He challenged, a small smirk on his lips. I raised my eyebrow, watching him.

"Alright, go ahead." I grinned. I felt the car slow to a stop, pulling onto the shoulder of a deserted street. He turned towards me, his big hand gently grasping my chin and his eyes sparked.

"I love you." His voice rang out strong and proud.

Of course he had found the one thing that would top everything else in the world. He knew no matter what I felt, it would never be in comparison to the way I loved him. I couldn't control the grin that spread across my face, and my heart took off, doubling. I could tell by his expression he could hear it, and could see my reaction to his words.

"That, my Jacob, Will always top everything. " It was his turn to smile, and he leaned forward, his lips pressing sweetly to mine. I let him kiss me for a moment but then pulled away.

"Come on, where already behind schedule and knowing you well have to stop for food soon." He grinned sheepishly, but pulled back onto the road.

"You say that like it's a bad thing."

"We ate less an hour ago. You had four breakfast sandwiches."

"So? Beside's, I didn't say I was hungry now. I mean I could eat but im not starving." He smiled. I laughed, leaning closer and slipping my hand up his shirt to his rock hard abs.

"Where does all that food go?" He thought momentarily and then smirked, glancing down at me.

"Keeping up with you." I laughed at that, he was known to be quite lazy sometimes.

"You think it's hard now, just wait till later." I said, giving him my most innocent look. I didn't have to elaborate on what later was, we both knew. Later when he didn't have to stop, when we could do whatever we wanted.

I heard a low grumble form in his chest, building but not escaping. His eyes found mine quickly but retreated to the road.

"Don't start now or it's going to be a very long trip." His voice was low and warning.

I grinned, pulling my hand out of his shirt and leaning back to my seat. I had worn deliberately comfortable clothes for being in a car for most of the day. I had on yoga pants, loose down near my ankles, sneakers and tank top, with a hoody on.

I played with the radio as we drove through the towns, keeping myself mildy accupied. I found myself watching him often, the manner in which he did anything. When there was a song he liked he would turn it up, his biceps flexing. When I shifted, his eyes would glance at me quickly, like he didn't even know he had done it.

The further we drove from my family, the more possibilities seemed to awaken. I grew bored with everything else, and just watched him.

"Why are you diong that?" He asked suddenly, when we were about two and a half hours into are journey.

"Doing what?" I asked, startled. I hadn't moved in the last half hour.

"Just staring at me." He huffed, and I grinned.

"Cause your handsome, and beautiful and sexy. Is that a problem?" I could tell he was thinking something else cause he looked shocked at my awnser.

"Oh..well I guess not. But your not supposed to call men beautiful Ness, its not manly."

"But you are, and I also said handsome and sexy. I don't have a problem with your manhood, do you?" I challenged, egging him on. I grinned when his eyes narrowed.

"No." He said quickly and I laughed.

"Good, know that's settled."

I rememberd something then, and happy I packed it I leaned up on my knee's, turning my body over the console and towards the back seat.

"What are you doing?"

"Looking for my bag, I wanted something." I said, searching for the right one. I found it and started digging through it.

"Would u get up here, your distracting me."

"Im not even touching you." I said, finally finding what I wanted.

"Your on your knee's bent over with your ass in the air Ness, sit down before I pull over. " He growled and I felt my face rush with blood, my heart beating faster. I climbed back into my seat, my sketch book in my hands.

"Better?" His eyes found mine, quickly sweeping over me and the object in my hands and then back to the road.

"No." He said, his hands tight on the steering wheel.

"How about we stop for food? Get out and stretch are legs." I suggested. He looked like he could use a break.

He nodded, and began pulling off at the next exit. We were in Idaho and began looking for a decent food stop. We picked a place called Scotty's drive in, and parked.

I climbed out, leaving my book on the seat and meeting him at the front of the car. I took his hand, leading him towards the building. The smell of meat and grease wafting around with the wind.

The door opened then, a large group of boy's stumbling out, tripping over each other in a roudy behaviour. I stepped over towards the side to allow them to pass, Jake's hand still mine.

One of the boys eyes fell to me, and tripping over his buddy again he elbowed him, getting his attention. I felt Jacob's hand in mine tighten, and immediately dropped my eyes, ignoring the boys.

I heard some whispers as they slowly passed, and I hopped they would continue on there way. With a relieved sigh the last guy passed and I quickly moved forward again.

Jake opened the door, letting me in. When he stepped forward he seemed to carefully rearranged himself around me. He was by my side now, with his big warm arm around my shoulders. I rolled my eyes at his slightly possessive manner.

We checked out the menu by the counter, decided on food and where to eat. He sent me to find a seat while he ordered and waited for the food. I made my way around the largish building, finding a quiet booth near a back window and sitting down.

My phone began to vibrate in my hoody pocket and I pulled it out, tapping the message icon.

 **HOPE YOU HAD A GOOD CHRISTMAS, I MISS YOU AND YOU BETTER COME BACK. HAVE A GOOD VACA, AND LET ME KNOW WHAT HAPPENS WITH JAKE ? ❤ -ALLY.**

I was laughing when he came around the corner with a tray full of food and two large drinks. He sat down, sliding it onto the table.

"Whose that?" He gestured to my phone.

"Oh it's Ally. She said to have a good vaca." I said. He was already stuffing frys into his mouth.

"Tll her ey sad hi." I laughed but nodded, texting her back.

 **I MISS YOU TO! ILL TAKE LOTS OF PICS OF EVERYBODY AND I WILL HAHA**

 **P.S JAKE SAYS HI! - NESS**

I hit send and began unwrapping my burger. It was pretty good for a fast food place, my food was cooked perfectly. I was sipping on my coke as he finished his food.

"Better not drink that to fast. Your ganna have to pee like 10 times in the car." I stuck out my tongue at him and went back to my drink. I always had a sweet tooth when it came to candy or soda. He streched out on the bench, his long legs taking up all the room on his side.

"We still have a ways to go." He sighed, pushing the empty tray away from him and streching his arm's out.

"Do you want me to drive?"

"Of course not." He said dismissively. I knew it wasn't a male vs female driving thing. It was a Jacob thing. His natural response was to always take care of me. In his head, that meant driving the long hours in the car. I knew it wouldn't make a difference so I let it go.

"Alright, I'll clean this up. Why don't you use the bathroom before we leave?" He started picking up the wrappers and I got up, heading towards the restroom sign.

I used the bathroom and washed my hands, splashed some cool water on my face and adjusted my clothes. When I felt alitte refreshed I pulled open the door, only to find my handsome Jacob leaning againts the wall, waiting.

He smiled and reached out for me, pulling me forward into his chest.

"Did I tell you today, that you look beautiful." He said, leaning his cheek on my head.

"I look like iv been sitting in a car for the past three hours." I laughed. He just shrugged, his arms around me.

"Are you ready?" He asked, and sighing I pulled back. We made are back to the car, getting in and pulled out onto the road.

I got comfy, kicking off my shoes and leaning back in the seat. The music was low in the backround and I watched as the scenery outside passed.

The low hum of the engine registerd first, then the slight vibration of a car moving fast over pavement. It didn't take me long to remember we where on are way to forks, and I blinked slowly. I was curled on my side in the passenger seat, my legs were stiff, and I had to pee.

I sat up alittle, releasing the lever and adjusting the seat.

"Hey baby." His deep voice rumbled out.

"Hey." I tried stretching in the limited leg space, but it didn't do much help.

"Need to stop and get out?" He asked, like always so intune with me. I nodded.

"Yes please. And a bathroom." I reached for his free hand, and he held mine, raising it to his lips and kissing my skin gently.

In minutes we were at a rest stop, pulling into a gas station. I got out and streched fully, raising my arm's well over my head. I was startled when I felt his hot palm rest on my bare back.

He had come around the car, and taken advantage of my stretching. His hand slid up slightly, and he pulled me towards him. He leaned against the car and his other hand joined my back, guiding me foreard between his legs and to his chest.

I leaned up on my toes, raising my face to his and kissing his hot mouth. He kissed me back, but it was gentle and controlled. We were public after all, and he was always a gentleman. He pulled away then, after one last soft kiss and stepped back.

"Im going to get gas and grab a drink from the store. Want one?"

"Yes please. Soda." I smiled greatfully and headed into the station, and followed the sign's for the bathroom.

Thankfully it was pretty well maintained, with just a slight public bathroom smell. After refreshing up I felt more awake and alert, and started to wonder how far we were from home.

I walked out, raising my eyes over the short aisles to spot Jacob. He was standing in line at the counter, and just my luck was a 20 something year old blond standing at the front of my aisle, her eyes locked on his massive frame.

I locked away my annoyance at the bimbo. She clearly couldn't help it and started down the little hall.

"Excuse me." I said clearly when I was behind her and she hadn't moved. She jumped, her face swinging to mine and she grinned.

"Sorry." She mumbled and stepped back to let me pass.

I tried to ignore what her face would look like as I approached his back, and raised my hands to him, looping them around his sturdy frame. I felt his hot hand envelope both of mine at his front.

"Hey." He said, lifting his right arm and I stepped around to his side.

"Hi. Where are we?" He smiled at me before pointing to a rack of noveltie keychains and postcards. They all read Ellensburg Washington.

"We should only be about two hours from forks." He said as he stepped up to the counter, putting down three bottles of soda, one a coke and the others mountain dew. Along with chips and a chocolate bar.

"Forks washington? Oh no dear's. That's still about four and half hours away." The old woman at the counter said regrettable, like she was breaking terrible news to us. I just smiled politely, no need in telling her with my tesla and Jake's driving we would be there in no time.

Jake paid for the food, and thanked her for her corrections. On are way out I caught the face of the blond from before, this time she was pink and had the decency to look abashed.

I was awake this time to watch the forest's grow greener, to see the moss start to creep over everthing. I was starting to get anxious and figgity the more we were in the car. I wanted to see everybody and get to be closer to my Jacob. I hated the center console inbetween us.

I was leaning as close to his as I could comfortably get, my shoulder brushing his, with my sketch pad in my hands, trying to distract myself from his burning heat. He was a furnace, his own sun and I had already shedded my hoody in the hope to feel his skin on mine.

I traced the outline of are little spot in the woods in montana, drawing out the shades from the sun shining down. I saw his right arm raise, going behind me and his fingers start to trail down my right shoulder.

I breathed out a sigh of happiness, I loved his skin on mine. His fingers ran smoothly up and down my arm, leaving a scorching burn in it's wake. I lost concentration on my drawing, instead I let my head fall sideways onto his shoulder.

I felt his chest rumble, a low, content sound and I smiled. His fingers traced his path for a couple more minutes before I felt his arm move again. I lifted my head as he brought it around to my front.

His big hand landed lightly on my thight, and I rested my head on his upper arm, my hands sliding to his forearm.

 _I love you._

"I love you. More then anything." He said softly, his thumb rubbing slow circles on my pantleg.

 _Are you happy to get away?_

"You have no idea baby." He said heavily, a smile in his voice.

 _I bet I do._

His hand slid another inch higher, his palm alittle more insistent. I kept control of my thoughts and breathing, but I was powerless to control my body. It leaned into him more, seeking his touch. My heart accelerated, rushing blood into my cheeks.

I heard his low chuckle, but I ignored it. There was no point in trying to deny my reactions to him. His fingers slipped between my thighs, his hand gripping gently. He was inches from my desire for him, and here we were in a car.

 _Jacob.._

"Yes?" He asked quietly, his voice slightly strained.

 _Can I ask you something?_ I thought hesitantly. He must of picked up on my nervous undertone cause his eyes flicked to my face breifly, before returning to the road, and his hand squeezed me gently.

"Of course you can, you always can."

 _Do you think..this week..?_ I trailed off, sure he would get my meaning. I was nervous to ask, but I was more not to ask.

"I..uh..well." He tripped slightly over his words, and I smiled. After all this time together he was still nervous also. It calmed some of my own, to understand he felt the same way I did.

"I don't know Ness, it's definitely possible..but.."

 _But?_ I thought.

"I just don't want us to do it just because we can. I still want it to be special. That doesn't mean im not prepared if it does happen." I thought about that, it was an awnser I pretty much expected.

 _Prepared?_ I felt him move in his seat, shifting almost nervously.

"Well ya. Im not chancing anything. I have been for a while. Just incase."

I thought about that, had he really already bought some? How long ago? And would we need them? I heard him chuckle and remembered then my hands where on him still.

"You know you don't always have to question everything baby." His hand left my leg, taking hold of mine and raising it to his lips.

"I know. It's just what I do." I shrugged. I was to much like my father sometimes.

A couple minutes later I nearly yelled as we drove past the welcome to forks sign. He laughed at my excitement, and then smiled hugely as the sound of big heavy paws hitting damp earth reached are ears.

The sound followed us almost the whole way, stopping in town and picking back up on the way out. I could smell the salty ocean in the air as we passed the border into la push. In less then five minutes we pulled up to a small bright red house, as three massive wolf's came bounding out of the forest.


	35. Chapter 35: Welcome Home

A/N: I want to seriously thank all of my patient followers for sticking through and PMing me to check up. Thing's have been seriously chaotic but I'm hoping this is the beginning of a somewhat normal routine again. You guy's are amazing and I promise to make it up to ya'll.

* * *

The car had barely came to a complete stop before I was out, my door swinging open and closing the distance between me and the deadly beasts infront of me.

It was Seth's sandy coat I encountered first, my arms wrapping around his thick neck. It had been to long without my extended family, and I vowed to myself we would see them more.

"Jake! Ness!" I heard Billy's deep voice, carry through the yard. I instantly felt happy, and I stepped back to release Seth.

Billy was in his wheelchair, on the small porch of their small house. Jacob and his pack had fixed it up alittle since starting their garage, adding space in Jake's room and replacing other thing's. Jake was already climbing the steps to his father, and crouched down so he was closer.

I followed after him, up the stairs and beside's Jake.

"It's really great to see you too kid. Now move aside so I can hug this beautiful little lady."

I felt my cheeks blush as Jacob chuckled once. He stood, his hand brushing softly against my cheek, then he stepped to the side.

I leaned down, carefully wrapping my arm's around Billy's neck. His embrace was strong despite the years carved into his face. It made me hopeful.

"How are you Billy?" He released me, and I stood up. Jake was gone, and but I found him quickly at the car, getting are bags out.

"Oh I'm doing good, real good. Rachel and Paul bring Aiyana over a couple times a week. Emily usually comes over with Dakota and Logan, those two boy's are something. I don't know how she does it." He chuckled.

I smiled fondly, thinking of the kids. Aiyana was the sweetest little girl in the world, one look at her and you were wrapped around her little finger. Sam's boys were the definition of the word boy. They were loud and always getting into thing's they shouldn't be, but they were also respectful little gentleman around woman. It had been so long since I saw them all, sometime last fall and that vacation ended up in fight.

I felt guilty remembering how it ended, but just them Jake made his way up the stairs, carrying the bags and winked as he passed. I looked out towards the yard, but the wolves were gone.

"Where did they go?" I grabbed Billy's chair, wheeling him inside and closing the door. The smell of tomatoes and oregano filled the cozy kitchen.

"I sent them home, well see everybody tomorrow. Alice says the weather will be nice enough to have a cook out." Jacob appeared back in the room, hands empty.

"Are we really?" I asked excitedly. "Where?"

"Probably Sam and Emily's. They have the most room."

"So we can see all the kids?"

"Yes." He smiled, stepping forward and looping his arm's around my waist.

"And Charlie and Sue will be there. Em said to come over first thing in the morning." I nodded, looking forward to seeing everybody. It always amazed me how Emily was able to put everything together.

"Are you two hungry? I made a Black family secret recipe." Billy said proudly, and Jacob smirked.

"Id love some Billy, thank you." I leaned up, kissing Jacob's cheek and went to the small round table in the corner.

Jake helped his dad serve dinner, getting drink's and making me a plate. He put them down at the table, wheeling his dad into his spot and sat a couple inches away from me.

I started in on my plate, like before, it was delicious. We ate a couple minutes in silence.

"You know, this was the meal I made your mother on are first date." Billy said casually, I finished chewing and smiled.

"Was it really?" He grinned.

"Ya, it was in this very house. It didn't go quite as smooth as this. It was my first time making it, it was a little burnt." His face seemed to drift, back years and years ago, to a different time.

"You never told me that." Jake said, his voice was a little tense. His right hand was balled ontop of his lap, but he didn't look angry.

I checked to make sure I couldn't be seen, and reached for it. He took my hand gladly, intertwining are fingers and placing are hands on my lap.

"When I decided to stop being an idiot, this is what I made for are first kind of date." Jake offerd, smiling alittle at his dad. He seemed to appreciate the responce.

"Ever since then, any time I messed up or we had a fight. I would make her this meal, and we would talk it out over dinner." He smiled fondly and forked another bite.

 _Are you alright?_ I thought, my hand still in Jake's.

He nodded slightly, squeezing my hand and we both finished are meal. I started collecting plates and taking them to the sink. I washed, and Jacob started drying and putting them away.

"Do u two have anything planned tonight?" Billy asked, wheeling his chair across the kitchen.

"I don't think so, I'm pretty beat." Jake said, drying the last plate and putting it in the cabinet. He handed me a dry washcloth so I could wipe my hands.

"Alright, well I think I'm ganna call it a night. I'll see you two in the morning."

He started to roll his chair down the hall, but paused and turned slightly around.

"And I'll be just down the hall from your room. Understand?" He eyed Jake, who nodded once and rolled away. A moment later his door closed softly.

I looked at him quizzically, But he just rolled his eyes and smirked. He took my hand, leading me down to the last door and pulling me through, closing it behind me.

"What was that about?" I asked. He chuckled once, and went to the bed, unzipping his bag.

"That was his way of telling me to behave in here with you." He grinned at me, and started unpacking his clothes. I felt my cheeks heat up, thinking about what he must think of us sharing a room.

"Oh.." I said lamely. The thought embarrassed me, but I relized that most people would probably assume that same thing.

He looked up from his dresser, studying my face, then walked to me. His hands cupped my cheeks, lifting it to his hight. His eyes were loving, and when he spoke his voice was gentle.

"Hey, it doesn't matter what anybody else think's, you know that." I smiled and nodded.

"I do, I guess I never realized what people would assume." I shrugged.

"Billy doesn't really care, he just thinks it's his responsibility to say it. Beside's..He can't hear us in here." He grinned, his hands sliding down to my waist and he pulled me closer.

I leaned up, his warm lips finding mine. It was a sort of solace, to have my Jacob around me, his hands on me. It didn't matter what was going on, he was always my universe.

He pulled back, leaving small kisses around my face, ending on my forehead and stepped back.

"Let's put are stuff away and then we can lay down."

I helped him put the rest of are clothes into his dresser, while he brought are shower thing's to the bathroom. I put my small makeup bag and jewelry box ontop and put are empty bags into the closet.

"Is that everything?" He asked, coming back into the room and closing the door.

"That's everything." I smiled. He kicked of his shoes, leaving them on the floor.

"Im tired." He huffed, and plopped down onto the bed. The digital clock on the bedside table only read 7:17, but I felt it to. I kicked my shoes off to, straighting both pairs on the floor.

"Well, I'm definitely ready for bed. I just have to change." I started for the dresser, but his hand caugh mine, tugging me gently towards him.

"Why do u have to do that?" He pouted slightly, his hands resting on my hips.

"I can't sleep in this." I said patently. He frowned.

"That's not really what I meant."

"Then what did you mean?" I asked, toying slightly with him.

"Well, you don't have to change, you just need less clothes, right?" He asked, to innocently. I try'd to fight my smile.

"I guess that's true."

"Soo, you just need to take these off." His hands slid up alittle to the band of my black yoga pants.

"I suppose, but I also don't sleep in a bra." I said slyly, watching his eyes dart to my white tanktop. I hadn't put my hoody back on.

"That can definitely be arranged." He grinned, dropping his facade. I laughed softly, leaning towards him for a kiss. He complied but a moment later he pulled back.

"Can I?" He asked, always a gentleman and making sure it was okay.

"Of course." I nodded, leaning back alittle to give him more room. His hands slid under my top, lifting it up my stomach, and then down, tucking into my waistband.

He leaned forward, pressing a hot kiss to my stomach, and his hands started sliding down, exposing my bare thighs. I felt my heart start to take off, felt the tightening in my stomach from his touch.

He pushed forward a little, moving me back and sliding to the floor on his knees. His hands continued down, tugging the fabric with them until finally they fell in a pool at my feet.

His hands slowly slid back up, leaving trail's of heat were his finger's touched. They ghosted over the side's of my panties, a white cotton thong and up my waist. He sat back up on the bed, pulling me closer to the edge.

His palm's caught the edge of my tank top, running up and over my breast, pulling it off completely.

His eyes swept over my white bra, it was mostly plain, a soft cotton with limited padding and a white lace trim. His hot hands came to rest on my back, and my breath got stuck in my throat, I was lost in the way he made me feel.

I waited for him to either release me or continue, but he did neither, just watched me. I started to wonder what he was thinking, maybe he wasn't sure what to do. I let my hands come up to his face, cupping his strong jaw and catching his dark eyes. I saw the conflicted emotions there.

"You don't have to, if your not sure. But if you want to, its okay with me." I said soothingly. His eyes seemed to calm slightly, but something new started to show through. Guilt? Or maybe regret?

"What is it? Talk to me.." I pleaded quietly. What was it that had him so afraid to touch me?

I stepped closer, in between his leg's and stroked his cheek softly. He broke eye contact tho and looked down, towards his feet.

 _You can tell me anything Jacob. I love you no matter what._ I thought, letting it flow through my palms and into him.

His hand gripped mine, holding onto it tightly.

"Im afraid." His voice was a whisper, but I heard it clear as day.

 _What are you afraid of?_

"..Myself?" It came out as a question. I tried to think of what he could mean, but his words didn't make sense to me.

"Im sorry Jacob, I dont understand." I wanted to, but why would he be afraid of himself? He sighed, lifting his head towards mine again.

"Im afraid I won't be able to control myself." He sounded ashamed.

"With me?" It started to make sense then, his hesitation. He nodded.

"Okay.." I try'd to think quickly, working it through in my head. He was afraid of himself, of his self control, with me. He obviously hasn't lost it yet, but we hadn't gone that far. So he was afraid of more? But why?

"Why are you afraid of loosing control? You haven't before.." He searched my eyes for a minute, compiling his thoughts maybe?

"Iv had to control myself, but I'm afraid of what will happen if we go further. I'm not exactly human Ness, there's a part of me that's very...animalistic, and that's the part I'm afraid of."

It started coming together then. Not only was my Jacob a wolf, but he was also an Alpha. A huge part of him was essentially an animal, which included those aspects. So he was afraid of his more animalistic desires.

"So your afraid of the wolf taking over when were together." I said, finally understanding. He nodded, dropping his gaze again. It was a relief, to finally understand his hesitation at our intimacy. This was something I was almost sure I could help with, and for that I relaxed almost immediately.

"Move back a little." I told him calmly, ignoring his questioning look and waited till he listened. When I had room I lifted my leg, placing it on the side of him and did the same with my left. His arm's reacted, wrapping around my back and holding me close. I allowed my hands to slid back into his hair at the base, the silky strands smooth against my skin. I made sure I had his full attention, his eyes on mine.

"My Jacob. Do you know what it means, when you imprinted on me?" I asked.

"If course I do." He said, confusion in his voice.

"Tell me then." I said. His brows furrowed, but he complied.

"Since the moment I saw you, you were everything. There would be nothing in this life that I would need more then you. I would do anything you asked, be anything you needed." He said confidently, he knew this much. I nodded, smiling.

"It also means that we were destined for eachother. Created in this world, with one heart broken in two, only to be whole when we are together. I knew from the second I met you, that you were on this world for me. It doesn't matter that I was a newborn, your my soulmate. Know, don't you think that type of connection, would apply to the physical? If I was made for you, and you for me, it goes without saying that were compatable in every way." He smiled slightly, his eyes swirling with different emotions.

"Your afraid of your wolf side, but I'm not exactly human either. Im not as breakable as you might think, and I have my vampire side to. It's okay to be worried my love, but we can't let that stop us. I won't let it. I trust you, with my life, so trust me to tell you when I'm okay or not..."

He watched me quietly through my speach, his hands softly stroking my back. When I was done he simply leaned forward, pressing his lips tenderly to mine.

"Your incredible, do you know that?" He asked, I couldn't help but laugh slightly.

"Im just reminding you of what you already know here." I put my hand on his chest, his heart pumping steadily under it. He shook his head slowly, a small smile on his lips.

"I don't deserve you." I rolled my eyes, ignoring him.

"I love you to." I told him instead. He grinned then, his hands sliding up my back.

"I love you more then everything." He said seriously, pulling me closer till I was flushed with his body, his shirt still on. I pouted.

"Your wearing alot more clothes then me." He grinned, and quickly holding onto my legs he stoods. I gasped at his sudden movements, and he chuckled.

He turned around, laying me back onto the bed. I watched him pull his tshirt over his broad chest, his hands going to the button and zipper on his jeans and making short work of them. He pulled of his socks, and climbed back onto bed, wearing only his grey boxer briefs.

My heart, that had somewhat calmed down started to pick up when he crawled forward, carefully placing himself between my legs, his left hand supporting his weight.

"Better?" He asked, but my brain was passed muddled.

"Hm?" He grinned.

"My clothes?"

"Oh..Right. Much." I blushed.

He leaned down, catching my mouth with his. My hands tangled in his hair, getting lost in his scent. My mouth parted, and his tongue slid in smoothly, expertly dominating mine.

My body called out for more, my leg's widened and wrapped securely around his waist. I felt the groan rumble in his chest, and his free hand gripped my thigh, holding it close to him.

I remembered to breath through my nose, but it did nothing to clear my head of his intoxicating scent.

His hand slid up my leg, his hot palm smoothing over my hip and following my small waist. His mouth broke free from mine then, pulling back and he rested his forehead against my own.

"I want you." His voice was deeper then before, restraining.

"Ya?" I asked, my cheeks turning pink but I couldn't help the smile. His hand slid along my skin, behind to the small of the back and lifted my hips to meet his. My eyes widened at his abvious arousal.

"Ya." He said firmly, his hand lowering me and sliding up my back. He toyed with the band, and I felt my own desire swell through my body.

"Can I-"

"Yes." I was embarrassed by my own enthusiasm, my face heating again but he only grinned. He was quick, his hand undoing the hooks in seconds.

He pulled back alittle, allowing more space between are body's, and his hand slid out, coming to rest on my neck. I couldn't tell if he was worried or just thinking, but his finger's started a slow decent down my colorbone, and my skin erupted into flames. I could feel my blood boil under his touch, spreading a blush over my whole body.

His hand veered toward my shoulder, Catching the strap in his path and dragging it down. I knew he wouldn't be able to get it off without my help, so as it came closer to my elbow I carefully slid my arm out without disturbing the cups.

My patient's was thin, I wanted his hands on me, his lips. I crossed my arm over my front, holding it in place and carefully slid my right arm out of the other strap.

I watched his face, to make sure it was okay or just to see his reaction I'm not sure. But his eyes widened, and I heard the sound of his gulp. I decided not to push my luck, and left it there. I layed my arms over my head, out of his way to remove it when he was ready.

He didn't move for a another couple second's, just watched my chest rise and fall, my bra loosly hanging on. Finally his eyes met mine, and I was sucked into the dark mass of passion and desire written so plainly on his face. I felt my heart swell with love and want and need, filling every part of my body and soul. The feeling was overwhelming, to much for one person.

I raised my hand, laying it softly on his cheek and allowed my heart to flow into him, sharing this all consuming feeling.

His most breathtaking smile lit up his perfect face, and his hand overlapped mine, holding it close to his warm skin.

"If I could do what you do, you'd see how very much your my everything. I love you so much it hurt's baby."

He pressed a sweet kiss to my wrist once, then moved forward and pressed his delicious mouth to mine. It was less loving, more want, which satisfied me just fine. His lips were hot and needy on mine, driving me crazy.

His hand landed lightly on my chest, his finger's glidding down the valley of my breasts and hooking under the material. I lifted my back up off the bed, and he pulled it off, tossing it to who gives a dam.

His hand slid under my back, raising my body to his and for the first time his skin was flush to mine. The feeling was incredible, his skin on so much of my sensitive body. Despite the heat I felt my nipples react immediately, hardening against his chest. Desire swam through my body, settling at my core and I knew he could smell me.

A very animalistic growl started deep in his chest, building until his mouth broke free of mine and came out as a low groan. I had a feeling if he would of opened his mouth it would of sounded just like my wolf.

"Fuck." His words came out strangled and deep, his chest filling rapidly with his breaths. His eyes were shut tightly, but quickly opened to find mine.

"Ness.." He sounded like he was begging, but for what I had no clue.

"My Jacob." The feeling of him was to much, my eyes slid closed and my back arched more firmly into him.

"I..I." He studderd, trying to form a sentence.

 _What is it._ I tried to think a coherent thought for him, but it was nearly impossible.

"I need..a minute." He sounded strained, and my eyes opened to the tone, worry immediately replacing the fire that was consuming me a moment before.

"What's wrong Jake?"

His eyes met mine, still desire filled but also desperate, for what ever reason he needed to stop. I let my hands raise to his jaw, stroking the skin gently.

"Alright, that's okay." I made my tone soothing, locking away the slight disappointment I felt. I would let him go at his pace, but it was clear he needed to relax, his body was rigid above mine.

"Why don't u go take a shower?" I hoped my suggestion wouldn't tip him off to what I knew, but something flashed in his eyes that made me think it did.

He nodded slightly, and casting his eyes away he quickly climbed off the bed, pulling the door open and disappearing, the door closing softly behind him.

I waited till I heard the water turn on to let out a sigh. I didn't understand what he was running from, was it the wolf or himself?

I climbed out of bed and went to the dresser, pulling out a soft tshirt of his and pulling it over my head. I took a moment for myself to calm my body, taking deep breaths and letting go of the tension. I climbed back into my spot, pulling the blankets over myself and waited.

It was only about ten minutes later I heard the water shut off, and sat up slightly, leaning againts the headboard. The door cracked open, and he walked in quietly, looking over to me. His tan skin was slightly pink in his cheeks, and he had a towel wrapped around his hips.

"Hey..." He sounded uncomfortable, abnormally shy for himself. He tossed his old boxers in a hamper by the closet, and closed the door.

"Hey." I held my hand out for him, and he complied, taking it and coming the few steps forward and sitting on the bed.

"Do you want to talk about it?" I asked gently, not wanting to pry. His cheeks were definitely pink.

"No, but I own you an explanation." He breathed out, sounding frustrated.

"Jacob, you don't owe me anything." But he was already shaking his head.

"I do Nessie, I need you to know it's not anything you did...well I guess it kinda was.." He smirked slightly, but I was only confused more. What had I done? He grabbed my other hand, turning more to face me.

"When I'm with you like that, its really hard to remind myself why I want to wait till were actually alone. Then on top of my own..desire, I feel yours."

He squeezed my hands lightly, and I felt my cheeks heat up.

"Im sorry." I said quietly. He smiled tho, and shook his head slowly.

"Don't be. Not even alittle. I love it, it was just to much. I needed to stop or I was ganna take you right down the hall from my dad." He wrinkled his noise, but smiled none the less.

"Oh." My head swam with questions, but I didn't think it was the write time.

"What is it? I can tell your thinking something." He asked gently. Of course he knew me.

"Its nothing." I smiled to let him know I wasn't upset.

"Baby, you can tell me anything. You know that." Of course when he turned my own words around on me I was helpless.

"Well, you said you had to stop or.." I felt the blush return, but try'd to ignore it.

"Does that mean..its kind of..all..or nothing?" I let my eyes wander to combat the embarrassment, but I was curious how he would take my question, so I returned to his face. It was pensive, he had obviously take it serously.

"Definitely not, I couldn't try that even if I wanted to. I think I just need to focus more on you next time, maybe shower first." He chuckled, and winked, which only caused me to blush again.

A drop of water was slowly making it's way down his cheek, only reminding me that he was indeed still in a towel. A glance at the clock told me it was already 9:43 and we would be up early, where had the time gone?

"That's good. Why don't we call it a night? We have alot to do tomorrow. " I was more relaxed with the situation know, understanding alittle better, and I was excited to see everybody tomorrow.

He gave me a grateful smile, and slid off the bed. I didn't want to invade his privacy so I was going to turn around when he stepped to the dresser, and casually pulled off his towel.

Just like the rest of his muscled 6'7 frame, his strong back tapperd into a narrow waist, his hips just slightly wider, and the most glorious behind in the world. I suddenly realized why he was constantly grabbing mine, and I wanted nothing more then to touch him.

He pulled open the draw, and slid on a clean pair of boxer's. I had just enough time to look away before he turned, flipping the switch on the wall and cast the room into darkness.

My eyes adjusted quickly, and he was climbing into bed, pulling the cover's over him and reaching out for me. He layed on his back, and I cuddled close to him, throwing my leg over his and my hand on his chest.

"I can feel your face, its hot." He laughed, even when he couldn't see my blush he knew it was there.

 _You have a great butt_. I though, internally laughing at myself.

He laughed out loud, tucking his arm under my head. It was long enough to reach down my back and his hand rested on my own.

"Yours is better."

He pressed a kiss to my forehead, and squeezed my ass lightly.

"I love you Nessie." He whispered, the tiredness creeping in.

 _I love you more my Jacob._

"Impossible." He mumbled. I let the sleep take me then, drifting into dreams of Jake and family.


	36. Chapter 36: Pancakes

A/N: Im so happy to be back into my story. I hope you guy's enjoy, and let me say there definitely is a whole lot of sweetness coming up, but also some intense passion in the next few chapters.

* * *

The sound of a loud blaring in my ear was the first thing to reach my consciousness. The abnoixous noise instantly annoying me.

"Jacob." The grumble came from behind me, that voice perfect even in it's tired state. I noticed then she wasn't in my arm's, the feeling leaving me oddly empty. Im pathetic, I told myself.

I cracked one eye open, finding the offensive alarm clock right infront of me. 7:00 am? Are you kidding me?

I groaned, reaching out and taking it in my hand. With a flick I sent it sailing into the air, were it promptly smashed into the drywall, finally shutting up.

A quiet giggle caught my attention, and my mind was instantly on her. I rolled over, careful not to roll onto her.

I felt my heart contract almost painfully, swelling with emotion. One look was all it took to knock me on my ass and leave me dumbfounded.

Her soft features were the first thing I saw, her delicate nose and her perfect plump lips, turned up in a small smile. She was bundled in the cover's, with them pulled all the way up to her chin. Her hair was wild, her tangled curls spilling all over the pillows. My eyes focused in on the strand laying across her cheek.

"Your staring." She whisperd, her face flushing pink, and she blinked slowly, her long lashes brushing against her cheeks.

How the fuck did she expect me not to stare when she looked like that?!

"Your so gorgeous." I told her matter of factly, and was rewarded with her blush again.

My hands itched to touch her, and did just that. I reached up, carefully grasping the strand still laying across her face and moving it back. She was still to far tho, and I slid across the small space, watching her smile as my hands reached out for her under the blanket.

She was warm as I pulled her into my chest, her small hands coming to rest on my bare skin, it was already tingling from her touch.

I stretched my right arm out under her head, guiding her face towards mine. I kissed her lightly, her lips pressed to mine.

My other hand clearly had a mind of it's own, reaching for her waist and smoothing down, over her hip and onto her bare thigh.

My mind flashed to the memory of last night, the feel of her perfect soft breasts pressed tighly to me, and I felt my body react painfully fast. Not good. I knew we had to get up soon and start are day, Emily was expecting us.

After so many year's of having her in my head I was still taken off guard when I felt a sudden wave of love pour into me. It wasn't hard to distinguish her's and mine. It was different, almost like it's own flavor..or color, but still so much like mine. Strong and all consuming.

She pressed closer to me, aligning her body with mine and swinging her leg over my hip. My hand unconsciously tightened on her thigh, her bare skin driving me crazy and my erection pressed into her.

My head swam with her intoxicating scent, her arousal mixing into her natural perfume. My hand glides up her leg, over her perfect hip. I internally thank what ever type of greater force bestoyed her with these curves. She's insanely sexy and doesn't even know it. Then I thank the same force she doesn't know it, if she did I would be helpless to deny her.

Her mouth pulls from mine, and she gasps air into her lungs, her chest rising and falling rapidly.

I take the opportunity to let me eyes roam her. The blanket has mostly fallen off, and she's wearing one of my blue tshirts. It's bunched around her hips, her white panties exposed. Continuing my path I take in the way the cotton stretched tightly over her heaving chest.

God I want to touch her. It probably means it's time to stop. Given the slightly resigned look on her face I took it to mean yes.

"I suppose we have to get up." She smiles, and starts to pull herself away from me.

"Nope." I hold on tighter and flash her my best smile. She seems to think about it and then curls back into my arm's, nuzzling her face into my neck. I get another twenty minutes until I feel her sigh against my chest.

"I have to go shower." She says regrettable.

Don't think about it, I tell myself. Don't think about it...about her naked body in the shower, the water falling down her perfet tits, rolling over her smooth stomach and disappearing inbetween her leg's, where I so desperately want to be. Fuck.

"Okay." I groan, because I know if I don't I won't ever let her go. So I make my hands release her, pressing a kiss to her forehead and roll onto my back

In seconds I regret my decision when she sits up, placing her leg on the other side of me and straddles my torso. She gives me a wicked smile that tells me she know's exactly what she's doing, and before I have time to process more then the delicious heat emitting from her core, she's gone. Climbing over me and off the bed.

I listen to the sound of my dad's snores, deciding hes still passed out and will be for a while.

"He's still sleeping." She flashes me a smile, grabs her rob of the door and pulls it open, disappearing before it closes quietly.

I lay in bed listening to the sound of her getting ready down the hall. When the shower turns on I turn my attention back to myself. I still have my problem but I take a few minutes going over what were doing today to take my mind of it, and finally I'm able to get up and pull on some clothes.

I decide to take advantage of her absence and head out to the kitchen, looking through the ancient cabinet's for breakfast. I finally find most of the ingredients to make pancakes, just as I notice my dad's chair rolling down the hall.

"Morning son." He says cheerfully. I like seeing him so happy, but the image of him being alone in this house when we leave bothers me. I push it aside, there was no point in thinking on it, I knew where I needed to be.

"Morning. Where's the dam flour?" I pull open another door, scanning the contents. When the hell did the cups move here?

"I think next to the fridge. Rachel loves to rearrange thing's when she's here. Calls it cleaning." He laughs alittle at her tendencies to move thing's where she thinks they should be. Despite myself I laugh to, and finally finding the flour I start on the food.

"Where's Ness?" He askes causally, wheeling himself to the table. Could he really not hear her in the shower? It took all of my concentration on not listening to her.

"Shower." I tell him, and carefully mix the ingredients together.

"Ahh..So...How are thing's between you to?" He asks and I can already tell where this is going.

"Where great dad. Never better." I grab the large pan and turn on the stove, waiting for him to continue.

"Good good. That's great to hear.." he mumbles. I roll my eyes.

"Are you going to actually ask what's on your mind?" I say, wanting to get passed his questions. Despite my focus on the food infront of me I hear the shower turn off, and the sound of the metel ring's sliding on the curtain poll. He clears his throat somewhat awkwardly, and I hear the seldom used dad voice.

"You know I'm happy you two finally figured it out, and I love Ness just like the rest of the family, I know perfectly well you'll take care of her."

It wasn't quite what I was expecting, and I looked up towards him to gauge what he means.

"What I'm saying is..When your ready to ask her, I think I have something you might want.." He was figiding with his wedding band still sitting proudly on his hand.

"Ask her what?" I asked confused, he wasn't making sense. He glanced up, a grin on his face.

"Ask her to marry you of course. " He said, like it was perfectly clear what he meant.

"How'd you know I was thinking about it?" I mean of course I was, I would be insane not to. I went back and forth all the time about waiting alittle longer and wanting to marry her this second.

"I ain't blind, five minutes is enough to see it written all over your face. I thought...Well maybe if you want to...You could give her your mother's ring. It's a tradition, my mom gave it to me to give to your mother. Of course you don't have to, but if you want..its okay with me." He wasn't looking at me, feeling slightly uncomfortable I'm sure with the topic, but at the end his eyes fell to mine, sure and strong.

I walked towards him, taking a seat in the chair beside's him and took his weathered hands in mine. So many year's of him holding my hands, so many memories passing by, but I thought about how much I hated having to grow up without my mother. Her not being able to see my beautiful Ness, and I instantly knew I wanted nothing more then for her to wear my mother's ring.

"Dad. I would love to give her mom's ring. Thank you so much. " I didn't hide the emotion from my face or voice, and neither did he. He smiled proudly and squeezed my hands, his surprisingly strong for his age.

"Ill make sure I get it out before you leave. "

The bathroom door opened, and I heard her soft footsteps cross over to the bedroom, the door closing behind her. I gave him another greatfull smile and got up to finish the food.

In less then ten minutes I had a large stack of pancakes placed on the table, and was getting the syrup from the fridge, placing it down.

"Ill be right back." I tell him as he forks a pancake onto his plate. I head down the small hall, and stop infront of my door. I knock lightly, not wanting to disturb her.

"Come in." She calls, and I open it and peak my head in. Already I can tell that this day is going to be torture.

She stands in the middle of the room, brushing out her wet hair. She's wearing light jeans, that hug her figure so dam well you'd think they were painted on. She has a white long sleeve v neck shirt, showing just a hint of her perfect cleavage, but just like the jeans, its tight, and I immediately want to pull it off. I tear my eyes away from her body and find her face. Her cheeks are pink, she caught me, but I don't care. She puts down her brush and secures her pandant around her neck. I love when she wears it.

"H-hey..I made breakfast, you hungry?"

For a fully grown male my voice just cracked like a 12 year old. Real smooth Jake. I tell myself. But her face only flushes more and she smiles sweetly.

"I'd love some." Her voice always makes me melt, and I pray I never have to go without it.

She walks the couple steps to me, her small hands reaching for my torso and sliding around me. How can one perfect angel like her make me feel so happy and wanted. She's tiny compared to my massive form, one of my many worries about us being intimate, but again I push the thought aside.

I allow my hands to reach down and cup her pink cheeks, my thumb brushing over her bottom lip. I hear her already quick heartbeat skip, and then take off, and I'm trying not to fall to my knees and beg her to marry me.

"You look beautiful." I say instead, leaning down and resting my forehead to hers. Her face break's into a gorgeous smile and I feel the temperature in her face heat up even more.

"Thank you." She says quietly, and I can't help myself any longer. I tilt her face up, pressing my lips to hers. I swear I died and went to heaven. Her full lips are soft on mine, and she tastes incredible. Fresh from her shower, but sweet, almost like honey, which is part of her natural aroma.

I allow myself a couple more second's before I pull back, kissing her forhead and taking her hand. I lead her down the hall and into the kitchen, letting her go and getting the juice.

I make sure I give her three pancakes before I load my plate, pouring some syrup ontop and digging in. She drenches hers and I can't help but snort. She has such a sweet tooth, but it gets so much worse around her time of the month, or every other month? I think back to the last time she got it and decided I probably still have about a week till she's due. I'll have to watch for the moodyness, that's always my first warning.

"What's the plan for today?" Dad asks, taking a bite from his own plate.

"Im ganna call Em right after breakfast and see if she needs anything from the store, then probably head over there. I want to get the pack together at some point."

I finished off my plate, leaning back and my eyes drifted automatically to her. She's about three quarters done with her food, but she's pushing the rest around her plate, a habit she always does when she's full.

"You done babe?" Her eyes met mine, an involuntary smile flashing across her face at my pet name and she nods.

"Ill clean them up. You cooked." She stood, collecting the dishes and started to taking then to the sink.

"Why don't you go call Emily? That way we can head out right after I'm done." She turned the water on, grabbing the sponge.

"Alright." I get up and can't resist myself, I lean towards her, leaving a small kiss on her cheek and head to the bedroom. I grab my phone, dialing the familiar number.

 **"Jacob."** Her cheery voice says from the other line.

 **"Hey Em, I was just calling to see if you wanted us to stop at the grocery store before we head over?** "

 **"Oh yes please! That would be soo helpful. I was going to try and go with the boy's but it's like taming lions."** She laughed, but even through the phone you could hear the adoration in her voice.

 **"No problem, what do u need?"**

She was about 11 items in when I decided I really needed to write this down. She laughed when I told her to hold on and then repeat exactly what she just said. One full piece of paper later and I had my list.

 **"Alright, we'll head out to get this all now and then be right over."**

 **"Wonderful. We can't wait to see you bot- No! Dakota do not sit on your brothers head. Oh Jake, I gatta go. See ya."** With a click the line was dead and I couldn't help but laugh.

I grabbed my jacket from the door and slid on my shoes, making my way back to the kitchen.

"Did u get the list?" Nessie was drying of her hands when I walked in, my dad missing.

"Yep." I held up the paper.

"She gave me everything right before Dakota tried to sit on logan's head." I tell her and am rewarded with her sweet laugh.

"Let me get my jacket and we can go." She passes by me, her hands brushing across my stomach, and I watch her make her way to the room, her hips swaying teasingly.

* * *

A/N: okay, but what do you guy's think about Jacob's pov? I honestly love writting him, it comes so easily. So I have a pretty big question for all of you. I have a pretty clear path for this story but there's too roads i could take. Im always one for a good passion filled romance, but I know some people like that drama and conflict mixed in. What do you guys think? I could take it either way so far. Please leave your opinions! Either review or pm me! The faster ya'll give your opinions the faster I can continue.


	37. Chapter 37: Barbecue

A/N: Sorry this one took so long to get out. Its actually been written for a while, just had to edit. Promise I'll have the next one out sooner. And I want to thank everybody that responded to my last note, I think iv decided the direction. Enjoy!

* * *

It was a familiar feeling driving through La Push and into Forks. We decided to go to the bigger grocery store their, and climbed into my tesla.

"Is it a large list?" I ask, and he chuckles, handing it over to me. I glance at the contents and understand his amusement.

"Well that's alright. I never get to go food shopping anyways, usually grandma goes." I wonder then about the thing's iv never had to do. What will happen when Jake and I want are own place? Away from my family.

Scene's play out in my head of just us. Going food shopping, and doing laundry, cleaning on a lazy sunday. As simple as they sounded I couldn't wait for those day's.

"Ya, she fills up mine also, but it's pretty easy."

We listened the radio as we drove through, pulling up to the large building. It looked pretty uninteresting, people walking in and out, going about there daily buisness.

He parked and killed the engine, stepping out of the car and immediately over to my side. I knew I could of beaten him to it if I wanted, but he's been doing it for years, so I let him.

I grin as he opens my door and I step out. It's not raining suprisingly, but it's cold out and there are puddles scattered around the parking lot.

Im not suprised that people stare when we pass. Jacob is huge, with his russet tan and intimidating features. But what they don't know is how very gentle this man is with me, how careful and loving he is. It fills me with a sense of pride to have his hand in mine, and I squeeze it, giving him a small smile.

He grins, and pulls me closer, instead wrapping his arm over my shoulder tucking me into him. His side is hot against mine, and he presses a kiss to my head before he let's go.

"Ill grab a cart." He heads over to the long line of unoccupied shopping carts and comes back, pushing a slightly damp old carriage.

"Why don't you give me the list and you push. Iv been in here a couple times." I hand it over to him, and he starts to lead us in one direction.

We spend about an hour going up and down isles, getting everything on the list and some. I do my best to restrain him when it comes to the junk food, but he only laughs and tells me where going to need it.

We head to the registers and ring everything up, taking are full cart of food and heading back into the parking lot.

"Here, start the car and I'll load these in." He hands me the keys and opens the trunk. I roll my eyes at his 'manly' ways, but I know he doesn't mean anything by it, so I comply.

I start the car and watch him finish loading in the food, then push the cart to a return station and make his way back. He slides into the seat, giving me a happy smile.

"You seem really happy to be back?" I ask. I love being back, but I know I have to go home eventually, and it makes me sad that Jacob has to leave his family again.

"Of course I am, I was born and raised here." We pull out of the lot and start the ride home. I know he would never leave me, not even if I asked him to stay. Which I realize I couldn't do, but I could give him something at least.

"Maybe we can come back..After I graduated I mean." I say, not sure of what he'll think.

"You mean visit more?" His forehead creases alittle, thinking.

"No..I mean stay. Live here." I tell him, and for some reason I'm nervous. Maybe he's not ready to live with me?

"But your family wouldn't be able to come back." I knew this of course, they couldn't risk being seen.

"I know that." I look out the window, slightly embarrassed that I couldn't seem to make my point. I didn't want to move back with my family. I wanted to come back with him.

I was suprised when the car came to a stop, and I looked around. At the end of a long dirt driveway was a medium sized house. It looked to be build completely from wood, the slats horizontal and painted a faded grey. There was a pretty blue door, and besides it a small tall window, that didn't seem to match the rest. Under those where planters, with slightly dead looking marigolds.

I felt his large hand take mine, and I looked over to him. His expression was serious, and he looked troubled.

"Nessie, do you me-" His words where cut off by the bang of a door, and a child's squeal.

"Uncle Jake! Uncle Jake!"

We both looked up to see Dakota jump the three steps from the porch, landing on the ground easily and start running down the path.

"Later." His words were a promise, but I still felt worried. He let my hand go and quickly climbed out, just in time for Dakota to reach him, skidding to a halt. I saw Logan still on the porch, climbing carefully down them. The boy's were only two year's apart, Dakota being five and logan three, but they where both a handful.

I climbed out, walking around the car to where they were. Jake was crouched down, already invested in Dakota's ramblings.

"Boys, let them come inside first." I heard Emily call from the door, laughing at them. She looked happy, her eyes on her children and her crooked half smile gentle.

I remember seeing her as a child when I was two, physically around seven. I could not understanding how she could of gotten hurt. When Jake had tried to explain it only made me more confused.

"But she's Sam's imprint?" I had asked him.

"Yes, she is."

"Then why would he do that?" It didn't make sense to me.

"He didn't mean to Ness, when where young, as a wolf, are tempers are bad. It was an accident, and he regrets it everyday of his life."

"But Jake, you would never hurt me."

That was my logic, I was his imprint and he wouldn't hurt me. Of course back them I didn't fully understand what it would mean.

"Of course not hunny, but iv had alot of practice with my control. Sam was still very new to his life."

There's been very few times where iv been exposed to the wolves tempers. But growing up around them I saw the way they were quick to react.

My mind swam back into focus as logan finally caugh up to us, and I leaned down just in time for his little hands to circle my neck. I held him close and he laughed when I stood, his legs kicking into the empty air.

"Aunty!" He exclaimed. It always made me smile to her them call me that.

"Hey handsome." He leaned back, a huge grin on his face. He looked so much like Emily, his features almost an exact copy.

"Aunt Ness!" I saw Dakota step back from Jake, and turn my attention to him. He was almost the opposite, so much like Sam, except for Emily's eyes.

"Look at you, your so tall!" I watch him smile proudly and stretch onto his toes.

"Why don't you bring Ness to your mom so I can grab the groceries." Jake patts the top of his head, and he nodds enthusiastically taking my hand and trying to tow me forward.

I laugh and follow him, but take one glance back to Jake. His eyes are on me, and he winks before turning back to the car.

I follow him down the path and up the porch, where Emily has the front door open. She's laughing at the expression on her son's face, which I can assume is pretty demending. The boys always love Jake, and do almost anything he asks them to.

We finally reach her and he drops my hand, pleased with himself.

"Thank you." He grins, but quickly takes off back down the stairs, in Jake's directions.

"Ness!" She laughs before folding me into a hug, despite logan still perched onto my hip. I hug her back, missing her welcoming personality.

"Emily, its so good to see you. We missed everybody."

We make our way out of the doorway, but leave it open. She leads me into the kitchen, where I can see she already has numerous projects going on.

"Everybody's coming today, were all excited to see you both."

I feel logan squirm in my arm and lean down, letting him go and watch as he heads for the door.

"Where's Sam?" I take a seat at the table, and she joins me.

"He took the truck to Paul's and Embry's to pick up as many barbecues as he can. There's going to be alot of people here tonight. They didn't even open the shop today."

I look towards the door as I hear his footsteps. I see Dakota walk in first, holding two bags proudly in his hands. Logan walks in behind him, holding on bag to his little chest.

"Good Job boys!" Emily praises them, and then Jake walks in, about ten bags in both hands. Of course he makes it look effortless, and carefully places them on the ground.

"Oh Dear. I didn't make you buy those all did I?" The good side of her face turns down into a frown.

"I had a bit of trouble reining him in." I tell her. He smiled sheepishly.

"Do you want help cleaning them up Em?"

"Oh no no, I'll take care of them." She jumps up, getting into action. He takes her previously occupied seat beside me, and takes my hand.

"Is it alright if I go meet the guys? Sam called and said he could use my help loading some things. Apparently Embry and Quil won't shut up." It sounded just like them, I couldn't help but laugh.

"Of course not, I'm going to help here." He nodded and glanced once at Em, but she was unpacking bags. He leaned forward, his hand falling lightly to my waist and kissed me.

"Eww." I laughed against his lips when I heard Dakota's complaint and he pulled away, but he was smiling to. He stood, musing the boys hair on his way.

"Ill be back with the guys." He called out, and disappeared.

I stood, and catching Emily's knowing smile I couldn't help the light blush on my cheeks.

"What can I do to help?"

I helped unload the rest of the bags, and followed directions to get out various pots and pans. I was filling a large pot with water for macaroni salad when I heard her throat clear slightly.

"You know Ness, I just want to say how happy everybody is that you and Jake are finally together. We already consider you part of the family."

Her words moved me, and I hugged her while I faught back the tears trying to escape.

"Thank you Emily, that means alot." She gave me a sincere smile, before returning to the food.

About an hour later we had huge bowls of macaroni salad, potato salad, and egg salad prepared. My ears picked up the sound of two trucks, and my car.

"There back." I tell her, and watch as her face lights up, much the same as mine did.

We go outside and watch as all three vehicles pull in, one large grill on each truck bed. Sam and seth climb out of Sam's, and both start making there way over. I see embry and quil come out of the other, and because I always notice him I watch Jake slid smoothly out of mine.

"Ness, look at you!" I hear Sam exclaim as I'm scooped into his big hug. I can't help but laugh, it always amazed how quickly Sam took to me, always kind and freindly. He chuckles and sets me down, stepping over to Emily and wrapping both his arm's around her.

I take turns greeting everybody and gettings hugs, as I watch Jacob's face turn alittle more annoyed with every hug.

Finally I'm able to go to him, turning forward but leaning back into him. I feel my cheeks flush when he wraps his arms around me, resting his head ontop mine.

"Im really so happy to be here, I missed you all." I let my hand fall to his that's resting on my stomach.

 _I missed you._

I felt his hold tighen, and I know he was agreeing.

"Well there's still a few thing's to do inside, why don't you boy's start unloading the grills and get all of the chairs out of the shed."

I heard his sigh before he kissed my head, and giving me a small squeeze he stepped back. I missed his arms around me, but headed back inside with Emily.

She taught me how to marinate and cook wings in the oven, how to make pulled pork in a crockpot and make her most popular deviled eggs. It was fascinating to learn how easily she handled everything. She could cook, handle her boys and mediate everytime an argument broke out outside. I knew if I was able to be half as good as she was it would be a success.

"Em, I don't know how you can possibly handle this all at once. But you do it amazingly." She laughed, and told me years of practice.

My mind worked fast enough to concentrate on what she was teaching me, but also on Jacob outside. His heartbeat stronger then the others, his footsteps lighter. I heard him argue with Embry over where to put the table, giggled when he said if he didn't shut up and listen he would make him sit at the kids table all night in time out.

"S'not funny." I heard Embry grumble and I couldn't help but laugh again. Emily didn't seem to mind that I was laughing at something she couldn't hear, but she would understand.

"Keep laughing princess." He mumbled again, and I heard a low smack before another mumbled.

"Sorry."

I tried to pay more attention to inside then, I didn't want to get him in any more trouble, but it only lasted a couple minutes before I heard a very familiar exclaim.

"Fuck!"

I dropped what I was working on and was outside in second's. My eyes immediately fell to him, standing by the shed with a camp chair laying on the ground. He held his hand gingerly in his other palm and I panicked. Now rationally I knew he was probably alright, and he healed incredibley fast, but at the moment all I knew was my Jacob was hurt.

"What's wrong?" I asked, quickly making my way to him.

"Nothing I'm fine. Just cut my hand on a nail." I took his hand, inspecting it. It looked pretty deep, and blood was oozing quickly from the wound. I felt my vampire side react, taking in the scent of his fresh blood and making my throat burn.

"Come on, you need to clean it out." I pushed my thirst aside and started to lead him inside.

"Bathrooms down the hall." Emily called out as we made are way inside.

"Ness, its fine. Itll heel in a minute." But he followed me despite his protest. We found it and I set his palm into the sink, turning the water on to run over the cut skin.

"Hey, are you okay?" It was just a whisper, his palm still coverd. Me? He was the one hurt.

"Of course I am. I didn't cut myself." I told him, confused by his questions. His other hand came up to stroke my throat softly, and I understood then. My hand covered his, are fingers entangled.

 _Im fine._ His eyes met mine, and he raises his brow.

 _Im alright, maybe we should go soon tho._ I knew I didn't have any reason to be ashamed of myself, he would never allow it.

"Anytime you want baby." He leaned down, kissing me once and then took his hand out of the water, his palm sporting a faint pink scar.


	38. Chapter 38: Bonfires

A/N: As always you guys are awesome and thanks for the patience! Hope you enjoy!

* * *

We finished setting up the back yard, me staying away from that dam shed. I didn't want another nail in me, I sure as hell didn't want to put Ness through that again.

She said she was alright, but I could see her react to my blood, the way her pulse raced and she breathed deeper. I didn't mind, which still shocked me, but it was who she was. I loved every part, even the vampire ones.

Hell, I'd probably let her bite me if she asked. Hmm..that's hot. I filed that away for later use. More people started to arrive, and we fired up the grill. Seth and I started collecting wood for a bonefire, after making a ring out of large rocks. Sam started grilling up large amounts of hotdogs, hamburgers. and sausages. I watched Ness as she started bringing out all the food they had prepped earlier, and Emily set out the soda, water and chips on another table.

The more people that showed up, the less I saw her. Actually, the last time I saw her was when Charlie's cruiser pulled up. She had dashed almost to fast straigh to him, giving him a big hug. You could see how happy it made him to have her there, I know Bells had already told him about us, but I worried on how he would react to actually seeing it.

My mind went back to earlier in the car, when she had asked if I wanted to live here. I didn't fully understand her question, of course I wanted to live here. It was my home, but so was she. I couldn't ask her to leave her family for me, and I would never go anywhere she wasn't. If she wanted to live in Alaska id go happily, as long as she was by my side.

The sun had already started to set and the fire had been lite. It was a mildy warm day in forks for december, tho the ground was damp with rain. Rachel and Paul had brought Billy over, along with Aiyana. The yard and house were packed with brother's, Imprints, kids, and family alike. There was a comfortable feeling of acceptance and family that settled over the group, some way or another we were all family, all loved one another. It was something truly magical to witness, and I would miss it when we had to leave.

But right know, I missed my girl. I went off in search of her, allowing the pull of the imprint to show me the way.

I found her in kitchen, sitting at the table with Emily, Rachel and kim. She had a sleeping Aiyana tucked into her arms, and she looked geargous.

"Uh oh. Imprint meeting, never a good thing." I joked, seeing them all look slightly guilty.

"Which one of us is introuble know?" I saw Rachel's grin and breathed a sigh of relief.

"Well why don't you come get some food with me before I'm next." I gave her my best smile, and she laughed.

"Fine, but only cause I'm hungry." She handed Aiyana back to Rachel, giving the toddler an adoring look. I had to ignore the feeling that swelled in me at the site of her with a child in her arms, not know Jake.

I feigned hurt, placing my hand over my heart and giving her my best pout.

"Aw, thanks baby." She grinned, making her way to me and winding her arms around my neck. I wrapped mine around her waist, lifting her up and turning to go out the door.

With the amount of people that where here I wasn't suprised to find someone right infront us. I was alittle suprised to find Charlie, with his arms folded over his chest, eyeing me. Oh right, did I currently have his only granddaughter pressed tightly to me?

"Charlie! Hey." I set her down, but didn't release her. I respected him a great deal, but there was no one on this planet that would make me feel anything less then proud and blessed to call her mine.

"Jake." He nodded, his eyes still on me.

"Grandpa, don't. I know mom already talked to you." Ness said softly, but also firmly. She loved Charlie, but she wasn't alittle kid anymore, and wouldn't allow anybody to treat her like one.

He humphed, and eyeing me again stepped to the side, allowing us to pass. She smiled at him, melting his hard face and grabbed my hand, pulling me towards the food.

I made myself another plate, having already eaten two hanging out with the guys, and she made her self one. We found seats at the picnic table, sliding in next to Quil, across from Embry and Seth.

"So I guess this means I'm officially out of the running." Seth said, looking at my arm around Ness. She snorted, wiping her mouth on a napkin. I knew he was only screwing around, and it didn't bother me as much as it once did.

"I guess so, you played a good game tho." She smiled, taking another bite of her macaroni salad.

He shrugged nonchalantly, shoving a forkfull of potato salad in his mouth. She rolled her eyes, but you could see the love she felt for everyone of these guys written like a book on her face.

"Quil, where's Clair?" Seth asked.

I hadn't noticed before that she wasn't here. But looking at him know, I could tell he was quieter then usual.

"She's grounded." He frowned, pushing bits of food around his plate.

"She's been getting in some trouble latly, getting to that age. Well they think by letting her not see me, that she'll smarten up." He sighed, stabbing a fork into his pork.

"Dam, that sucks. Is it working?" Embry asked.

"No, she just gets madder." He sighed, pushing his plate away.

"That will never work." Ness said matter of factly, taking her last bite.

"Why not?" Quil asked, defeated.

"Well if she's acting out chances are there's a reason. Her parents might not understand but you will. Or you'll try. Take it from someone who's been a young imprint. She needs you know more then ever, she needs to know that you'll be there no matter what." She said confidently. She looked up, noticing then that everybody was looking at her and looked down, her face flaming.

"You know, I think your right." He said suddenly, standing up.

"Ill see you guys later." He called, walking towards the woods. I laughed, sliding my arm around her back and pulling her closer.

"Well, you single handedly are driving off the guests."

"Oops." She laughed along with everybody at the table.

Acouple people started to take off, Charlie and sue said goodbye, after eyeing me again. Then Rachel and Paul with a still sleeping toddler in his arms. We made plans for dinner at Billy's before they took off.

Eventually we made are way to the fire, and I sat on a campchair, pulling her with me and into my lap. A smaller grouple of people were left, just us, Seth, Embry, kim, Emily and Sam after putting the boys to bed.

"How come leah couldn't come?" I asked seth.

"She's at school, didn't want to make the trip back I guess. She just didn't want to leave her boyfreind." He rolled his eyes, but nobody could blame her. She was finally in an okay place. She hadn't imprinted still, but she seemed happy enough.

"Talking about school, Jacob. How are your classes going?" Em smiled, always the mother.

We talked for a bit about my classes, and then Nessies school. We talked alot about the plans for the shop, and alittle about expanding.

Sam and Emily where thinking about doing another addition onto the already added house.

Embry and Kim talked about the house they just bought, and the plans they had for it.

"Well..I put on deodorant this morning." Seth said, making Ness laugh and Sam roll his eyes.

"One day Seth, something great will happen to you. You'll see." Emily told him, but he just laughed it off. Seth was always a happy go lucky guy, but it must of been anoyying to always to be the odd man out. I could remember a time when I felt the same way.

She leaned back into me, her leg's across mine and I wrapped my arm's securely around her. I loved the feel of her body on mine, it calmed my head and soothed my heart. At one point her hand smoothed down my arm, her mind open to me, and I could feel how utterly content she was. Here with the pack, and in my arms.

"So not to pry, but when did this become official?" Emily asked, smiling at us. Of course the word had gotten out months ago, but there hadn't been any interigation yet. I felt her cheeks heaten on my neck where she rested, so I decided to go.

"Well, officially or unofficial?" I asked, and I felt my love laugh.

I launched into a pg story about when I started to feel different, and hit the main points. I told them about when I realized how stupid I was and how I tried correct it, making her dinner and officially asking her to be my girlfriend. By the end of my story everybody was quite, taking it in.

I heard her heart slow slightly, and her breathing evened out. Her body relaxed against me and I knew she had fallen asleep. I had no desire to wake her, so I stayed still, chatting with them.

When Emily yawned and Embry stood, I decided it was probably time to call it a night.

"Do you want us to come over in the morning and help you clean up?" I asked, keeping my voice down. She glanced at the sleeping girl in my arms, and shook her head.

"Don't you worry about it, it was are pleasure to have you guys here." She smiled sweetly and started to get up.

"Come on nerd, where dropping you off." Embry flicked Seth's ear, and he swatted at him.

I slid carefully to the edge of the seat, sneaking my arm under her legs and tried not to jostle her as I stood. Em came over and kissed my cheek.

"Well see you again before you leave?"

"Yes ma'am." She smiled, and made her way to the house. I turned towards the drive, when I notice sam start with me.

"Everybody's happy to see you both home." He said, walking casually with me.

"Its nice to be home." I tell him.

"You know Jacob. The pack's not the same without you. With me gone, and you. Embrys talking about stopping soon also."

I had one of those moments when I realize how much more life I'm going to live. One day, everything I know, everybody I know, will be gone. My dad and sister, my pack. They will fade, and I will not. I suddenly found it hard to swallow.

"I know, but I think, were going to come back...Im not sure yet, but I think that's what she wants" I look down at the sleeping woman in my arms, and remeber that it's worth it. As long as I never have to lose her, I can handle everything else.

"Well I hope you do. You and Ness, your family know matter what."

We reach the car then, and he pulls her door open for me. I try my best at placing her in the seat, but it's tricky when she doesn't want to let go. Finally I get her in and close the door.

I turn back, but he's already half way to the house. My focus had been on her, I didn't even hear him leave. I climb into the other side, shutting the door lightly and start the engine.

Thankfully I'm only about five minutes from home, so I make it there and get the car off. When I try to pull her back into my arms, she stirs.

"Jacob?" She mumbles, curling into my chest.

"Shh, I'm right here baby." I get the door closed and head up the ramp covering the few steps.

"Where.." she strails off.

"Where at Billy's, almost to my room." I manage to get the door open and closed, and head through the kitchen, carefull to keep my steps light so I don't wake Billy.

"Hmm.."

"You gatta change hunny." I finally make my way into my room.

"MmMm." She sighs, ignoring my attemps.

"Ya, you do. Come on." I set her down onto the bed, closing the door. When I don't see her react I just laugh, and step forward. I pull of her shoes, one by one and place them on the floor.

"Jacob...why are undressing me?" She asked sleepily.

"I told you baby, its bed time. You have to change." Her eyes flutter alittle, blinking slowly.

"Oh." She sounds almost disappointed.

"What did u think I was undressing you for?" I question.

"Something alot more fun then that." She mumbles, closing her eyes again. I can't help but laugh.

"Come on, undress and you can have a kiss. " Her brow pulls together in an adorable pout, and she groans.

"I need help." I think that over for a moment. I don't think there's anyway I'd loose my control tonight, so I figure I'm safe.

"Alright, but don't get any ideas missy." I slid my arms around her neck, finding the delicate chain and latch of the necklace and relasing it. I store it safely in her box on the dresser, and return to her.

"Im ganna take of your jeans, is that okay?" She makes the effort to open her eyes, giving me an eye roll and a look that says what do u think? I ignore her sass and reach for the button. I feed it throught easily, but it doesn't make much of difference when there so tight.

I work them down her hips carefully, my hands sliding inside when there's enough room and down both legs. I pull them off, and fold them, placing them ontop of the dresser.

"You need to sit up if u want help out of your shirt." She huffs, practically drags herself up into a sitting position, her eyes half open and on me.

"Why are you making me be awake right know." She moans. Well check the box for moddyness.

"Just a couple more minutes then you can go to bed baby."

I get her long sleeve shirt over her head and off, and that's when I decide that this probably wasn't a good idea. Her hair is down and wild, and shes sitting there only in her bra and panties. I think she notices that I'm finally alittle lost. Cause she smiles lovingly.

"Hand me a shirt?"

I pull out a soft green t shirt from my draw, handing it to her. She pulls it over her head and down her torso, then reaches behind her, and skillfully manages to slid her bra off. She gives me a another smile befor chucking it across the room and plopping back onto the bed.

Shes breathtaking, laying infront of me. So comfortable, it makes me fall even more in love with her.

I quickly pull of my jeans and shirt, tossing them into the hamper.

"You gatta move over baby." I tell her as I climb onto the bed.

"MmMm. Done moving." I roll my eyes but slid my hands under her, scooting her up the bed. I pull the blanket out and slid into the space beside's her.

As soon as I pull the blanket over us shes turning into me, resting her head on my chest and her leg over my thigh. Her warmth makes my skin tingle, and I want to run my hands over her, but I know she's tired. So I kiss her head and hug her closer.

"I love you my Nessie."

Im half suprised when her head raises towards me, her eyes stills closed. I press my lips to hers, softly and she sighs, a happy content sound.

"I love you my Jacob." She lays her head back down, snuggling closer into me.


	39. Chapter 39: Imprints

A/N: I have no real good excuse for why this took so long. life I guess. I Just hope yall are still waiting for this, and I'm hoping it's not to bad. It's been awhile since i've written. On another note i want to say that i plan on responding to every one of your guys pm's, just give me a little time to get back into the swing of things. Hope you enjoy!

P.s- Feel free to leave any comments you guys might have, this chapter has been half written for quite some time so i'm hoping it doesn't seem to...chopy.

* * *

I feel the stiffness in my body as I start to wake up. The one that tells me I have been asleep for a long time. I take a moment and stretch my limps, trying to shake off the remnants of sleep. I let my hand wonder across the bed, searching but its empty. Where's my Jacob?

I pull myself up, looking around the small room. My clothes are folded neatly on the dresser, and I remember faintly him undressing me last night. I blush, but i'm touched by his sweet actions.

I try to find out what time it is, but the alarm clocks missing, no thanks to him, and all I see is sun outside. Not early morning, I figure. I notice then my phone laying on the nightstand, and pick it up, the screen illuminating.

 **Try'd to wake you but it was impossible, if it wasn't for your heartbeat I could of sworn you were dead. Going to the shop for a little, ill be home for dinner. Call if you need me, I love you. -Jacob**

It also told me it was nearly 11:00 in the morning. Had I seriously slept that long? I needed to get up, so I slid out of bed, stretching my whole body this time. I can smell the remainder of grilled food and fire cling to my hair and skin, so I decide the first thing to do is to shower. I take my robe of the door, tying it around my body and step out of his room. I can hear Billy's heartbeat somewhere close, and listen harder till I make out the sound of a sports game playing on the tv in the living room.

I enter the bathroom, taking in the lingering scent of my Jacob. He must of showered this morning. I was surprised at how long I had slept in, but then again I was never one for staying up late, and the couple times I did with Ally I had always been cranky in the morning. I started my shower routine, my mind wandering off to what Jacob was doing. He was probably under the hood of some car, looking beyond sexy. I tried to push that thought away. I needed something else to think about. Dinner, what was I going to make for dinner. That was a safe topic.

I finished my shower, drying myself off and pulled my robe back on. I stepped into the bedroom as I heard my cell phone ring. I pick it up, noting the name on the screen.

"Hey Emily. What's up?"

"Ness, Hey. I was going to call earlier but Jake said you were out cold. Rachel and I where going out for lunch. Do you want to join?"

"I'd love to. I just got out of the shower, I just need to get changed."

"That's perfect. Come over when your done and we can head out."

I hung up and smiled to myself. If I was being honest I had been a little worried about how I would be perceived. Sure I had known everybody my whole life, and I knew I was accepted. But I was more then just Ness know, i'm Jacob's girlfriend, his mate. It seemed kind of silly to think it would change anything, but I felt relieved none the less.

I got changed quickly, pulling on jeans and a green tank top. I picked out a zip up sweatshirt and boots, then secured my necklace around my neck. I picked up my phone, hoping he wasn't busy at the moment and dialed.

"She's finally awake." His deep laughter melted my bones, making me wish he was here with me.

"Ness Baby? You okay." He sounded worried then, and I chastised myself.

"Im fine Jacob, Just miss you."

"I'll come home right now." He told me, and I knew he would.

"No no, that's okay. I'm actually going out with Emily and Rachel. I just wanted to hear your voice. I missed you when I woke up."

"Im sorry hunny. I miss you to. What are you girls going to do?"

"Where going out for lunch, not sure after that. But i'll be home and have dinner ready."

"Ness babe, you know you don't have to make dinner, I am a grown man." He teased.

"Oh i'm well aware of that, and you can cook next time." I smiled, we always shared responsibilities. It was actually me trying to get him to stop doing so much for me.

"Deal." I could hear his smile, imagine his face right in front of me.

"What are you doing?"

"I just showered, i'm getting ready to head out."

"Hmmm." I smirked at his tone, curious to what he was thinking.

"What?"

"Oh nothing. Just thinking about you in the shower." I felt my pulse jump suddenly, at the mere thought of it.

"Don't do that." I growled lowly, trying to ignore my body's reactions to his words.

"Do what?" He asked too innocently.

"You know what." I heard his deep chuckle and growled again.

"As much as I love playing that game, the guy's can probably hear me and you should get going." He at least had the decency to sound guilty after teasing me, but I knew he enjoyed it still.

"Ya, I probably should. Ill see you later."

"okay, Love you." I told him, taking my bag from the back of the door hook.

"I love you too." There was a pause then the phone went dead.

I tossed it in my bag, fighting back the stupid smile on my face. Almost four months and I was still putty to his words. Then again I had long ago given up any notion of not being head over heels for him. I knew I had it lucky, most girls my age went through scores of guys, one after the other all trying to find something to fill their needs. I had been born into mine, and while some people might have felt like there life had been decided for them, I knew better. I have never felt anything other than grateful for what I had.

I pulled the door open, making my way into the living room where Billy was sitting in his chair, watching some hockey game. I shook my head at how some men have always seemed to gravitate towards sports.

"Hey kid, I was wondering if you were ever gonna make it out of bed." He laughed, turning a little in his chair to face me.

"Ya, I think that's the last time I try to stay up passed my bedtime." I tell him, cracking a smile. "I'm going out for lunch with Emily and Rachel, will you be alright here by yourself?" He rolled his eyes, making a very Jacoby expression.

"You sound just like my son. You know I do live here full time by myself. I'm pretty capable." He grinned. I stepped forward, leaning down to kiss him on the cheek.

"You know we don't mean anything by it Billy, i'll be back." His attention had already been pulled back to the tv, two men arguing, while the referee was trying to pull them apart.

I headed to the door, briefly contemplating if my car was here. I hadn't even thought to ask Jacob. I knew I could of asked Emily to pick me up, but as I stepped outside it became irrelevant. In the driveway was my Tesla, parked in what I assumed was the same spot as last night. I slid in, adjusting my seat forward as my legs were not as long as my Jacobs. I pulled out of the drive, following the roads back to Emily's house.

My mind wondered back to yesterday, right when we had pulled up to Emily's house. His promise of later was lost to my sleep deprived brain last night, but it was at the front my mine today. What did he think about my question? He had seemed confused, as if he couldn't understand why I want to live here with him. For me it was simple, for my whole short life, he had always sacrificed thing's for me. He had put his life on hold, to help protect me, and raise me. He moved away from his family to stay with me. The very least I could do, was give this to him. It wasn't even really a sacrifice, sure I would miss my family, but I knew we would visit. If I was being honest with myself I knew I wanted some distance from them, at least for a while, so we could start are life, figuring things out for ourselves.

I pulled into her drive, parking on the other side of Sam's truck. Rachel's car was already there, and I walked up to the front steps, about to knock when the front door opened, Sam on the other side smiling. Sometimes I forgot how much better there senses where, even compared to mine.

"Ness. Come on in, the girls are in the kitchen. I'm just about to try and get the boy's down for a nap." He sounded like he was about to go to war. I giggled, noticing logan's little form hiding in the doorway down the hall.

"Good luck with that." He grinned, turning and started stalking down the hall. The boys squealed, scrambling into the room and shutting the door. There laughter was contagious, and Sam was always so good with his kids. Even when Jacob was with them he always had a natural way with them and I had a quick flash, of my Jacob with a baby in his arms, smiling proudly at me.

Woah. I shook my head slightly, clearing that one from my brain. I wasn't even letting myself think about why I was thinking about that. The dangers of those thoughts alone seemed to vast. I made my way into the kitchen, taking note of the two woman sitting at the kitchen table, looking at a picture on Rachel's phone. They looked up smiling, noticing me.

"Thank god you're here, i'm starving." Rachel said, already standing up. Emily was laughing and shaking her head, standing also.

"Ignore her. She's always hungry." Rachel looked slightly bashful, but just shrugged, leading us towards the door.

We climbed into Emily's car, backing out and making are way to one of the small dinners on the Rez. We chatted on the way, while they caught me up on the happenings of the kids and the pack. The place was crowded but homey, and we were served quickly, getting many friendly smiled and greeting. The imprinted woman were always highly respected, so anybody in on the secret was always friendly.

"So let's hear your story, but remember, that's my brother your talking about." Rachel said, simultaneously wagging her eyebrows and scrunching her face. Emily laughed, but looked at me expectantly.

"What do you mean? We told you last night.." I felt my blush, becoming nervous as both woman looked at me.

"Actually, Rachel left early yesterday, but that's not what she meant." Emily said, softer and more understanding than Rachel's directness.

"What Rachel means Ness, is that where all imprints. Where bonded, and we understand things in a way that some may not. So if you ever have any question, or want to know anything, you can always ask us. It stays between us only." She smiled sweetly, only one half of her pretty face doesn't move with the other. Her offer actually did make me feel better, knowing that there was always someone out there that would mostly understand.

"Ya, that's what I meant, sorry, Paul say i'm a little tactless. " She smiled sheepishly, dipping a fry into her ketchup and tossing into her mouth.

"It's quite okay, I actually really appreciate the offer." I gave them a genuine smile, but Rachel was still looking at me.

"Sooo?" She said. I couldn't help but laugh, albeit nervously.

"So what?" I asked.

"Do you have any questions?" I think she was genuinely enjoying my torture.

"Oh umm, I don't know. Like what?" My head was swimming with question, but they were mostly personal, surly they didn't mean those? Most people didn't expect those type of question, and I wasn't use to being asked, unless it was Ally. She was the second most noseist person I knew.

"Oh honestly Ness, you know what I mean. Have you guys done it yet?" Em bumped her, chidding her softly. My face i'm sure resembles a tomato.

"You don't have to answer that Ness, Rachel's just being nosy." My immediate response was relief, but then a little regret. It wasn't exactly something I wanted to talk about with my mom, and I knew Ally couldn't understand fully, cause I couldn't tell her fully. So would it really be so bad, to have someone to talk to? Two woman who clearly understood, and where moms? I battled internally for about 30 seconds, till I made my decision.

"You promise it stays here? " I asked timidly. Rachel nodded her head, while Emily smiled.

"Of course Ness, it never leaves us. Its always been like that between us imprints." She said reassuringly. I fought of my embarrassment, deciding to use this time wisely.

"Well we haven't..uh..you know. It's kinda hard with my family so close, we want to be completely alone." I said, talking fast and glancing around.

"That makes sense, and it's good that you guys have talked about it. Communication is important." Emily said, it was impossible not to feel calmer with her, my nervousness fading slightly.

"Well it's always best to be alone, especially with boys like that. Paul doesn't know how to be quite." Rachel said, rolling her eyes. Emily nodded slightly, smiling to herself. I laughed a little, shocked at the personal detail.

"I remember when it was all that knew. The excitement and rush of it. I was terrified." Rachel said, taking a sip of her soda.

"What do you mean?" I asked, trying to understand her comment.

"Well you know what I mean, look at them. There huge, even Jake is bigger than them all. Of course I wasn't a virgin so I knew what it was like, but still, looking at him I was terrified it would hurt." She said matter of factly. Em looked worried at me, like she was afraid I would get scared off. It wasn't the first time the thought had entered my head tho. I had thought of that one, and was slightly worried about it myself. However I knew it would be worth it, and it would work itself out.

"Rachel, maybe that's not the best thing to say." She started.

"No it's okay, i've already considered that. I'm a little worried, but I have a bit of an advantage, I'm not as...fragile as you guys are." I said, hoping the comment wasn't rude. They didn't look offended, and nodded slightly.

"That's true, i'm sure it'll all work itself out when the time's right. Just make sure you're both ready and prepared. We have plenty of babies running around already." Emily said, laughing softly. Rachel grinned, leaning forward.

"Is this a bad time to tell you guys that i'm Pregnant?" She said, laughing slightly. Em looked shocked, looking at her, then at her tummy.

"Are you really? oh that's so amazing!" She all but squealed, pulling Rachel closer and hugging her.

"What, you just thought I was getting fat?" She asked, mocking anger, but she couldn't keep the smile off her face. "We were going to make the announcement yesterday but it was so hectic." She explained.

I was thrilled, thinking about how happy they must feel, and how thrilled Billy would be. The image from earlier rattled in my head, but I shoved it away, not know. I couldn't even begin to think about that.

"Rachel that's amazing, mi so happy for you. Jake's gonna be ecstatic." She grinned, her hand resting tenderly on her tummy.

We chatted for a little while longer, then paid and left. The car ride back was filled with laughter and I felt happy, truly happy to be here, with the other half of my family. When we pulled back into the house, I could make out the sound the sound of a tv on, and Emily looked about ready to bolt into the house.

"Nobody spill the beans, we wanna be the ones to tell everybody." Rachel said, patting her belly. I nodded, hugging them both then climbed into my car, waving and pulling out.

I was content driving back to to Billy's house, thinking about how wonderful my day been. When I pulled into the driveway and killed the engine, my ears immediately picked up the rhythmic beating of a strong heart. My Jacob was home. I was barely out of my door when the front door opened, and he was making his way down the ramp. I grabbed my bag before closing my door and turning, having about 20 seconds to prepare before i was scooped into his huge arms and spun. I laughed, enthralled by him near me again. I haven't even realized that he had taken half of my heart this morning, not until it was back and I felt whole. He placed me down, his warm hands cradling my face and he kissed me, his perfect mouth soft and loving against mine. Once, twice, three times, till he pulled back slightly and placed one more on my forehead. I was breathless, overcome slightly with my feelings for him. every single time I thought there was no way I could ever love this man more, he goes and proves me wrong. All I could do was smile stupidly at him.

"Hey." He said, taking my hand and starting towards the door. I laced my fingers with his, loving the feel of my small palm in his.

"Hi. how was your day?" He held the door open for me, allowing me in first. He grinned innocently, but as I passed I felt his hand smack lightly to my ass and I gave him an indulgent smile.

"Oh you know, customers and the boys constantly bickering back and forth. It was nice tho, i missed being in the middle of it all." He said, wistfully. I felt a little guilty, i was the reason he wasn't here anymore.

"But being back made me really glad I decided to go back to school. I was walking around today, thinking about all these things that we could change up, just little thing's that I think it would be beneficial in the long run, and seeing the numbers were thinking about expanding. Just tossing some numbers around really, it would be a pretty big project so were not decided yet."

I listened to him go on about his ideas, and numbers. I was thrilled he was excited about this, and was actually getting some use from going back to school. We sat at the kitchen table and talked, and I couldn't help but wonder if this is what it would be like someday. when we couple have our own place, having everyday conversations. Not worrying about someone overhearing, or having no personal space. I realized then that I was so ready for it. I wanted it, and him. I wanted it all.

"Ness? did you hear me?"

"Huh?" I looked up, guiltily, at his smiling face.

"Did I bore you that much?" He laughed, and my cheeks blushed pink.

"No, not at all! I just got distracted. Im sorry. go on." He grinned, shaking his head slightly. He leaned forward, grabbing the edge of my chair and pulled me forward, till i was in front of him, my knee in between his and my face inches away.

"Care to tell me what you were so distracted bye?" He smirked, leaning closer and kissing my cheek. I looked around, stretching my hearing out but no one was around.

"Billy's out at Charlies place. Don't worry, no ones here." He planted another kiss on my jaw.

"I..ah. I was thinking about you..us..This." My brain was turning into pudding, his lips were still slowly moving there way down my jaw, and to my neck. They ghosted over a tender spot, and my body shivered, one of his palms rested on my thigh, his thumb stroking circles.

"Mhmm. Im listening. What about us?" He asked, there was a definite teasing note in his voice. He was enjoying himself. He sucked lighty at that spot, probably renewing a fading mark.

"Uh, here..alone.." My breath was coming harsher know, my chest rising and falling rapidly. I knew it was mid day, and Billy would probably be home soon, but that didn't stop my body from responding to him. I felt my heart race, and I squeezed my thighs together, trying to ignore the desire swimming through me. He wasn't helping, both is hands where know in my lap, running slowly down the top of thighs, and then back up.

"Jacob." His name fell from my mouth like a plea. I wanted him to stop, but I so badly didn't want him to stop. I wanted him to fix it. The building in the pit of my stomach, I wanted him to make it go away. Only problem is, I didn't even know how to make it go away.

Just then the sound of a car door closing caught both of are attentions. I could make out the sound of metal wheels rolling across the gravel. He pulled back, a mischievous glint in his eyes and gave me one lingering kiss. Then he slid his chair back and stood making his way to the door, helping his father up the ramp.

I tried to take deep breaths, calming my frantic heart and willing away the blush I was sure was on my face. I pulled my hair around my neck, covering anything that might of been there. Just then they came through the door, Jacob smiling innocently and chatting with Billy. He was so in for it.

The door closed behind me, a faint click ringing in the air, mixing with Billy's snores.

I toed my sneakers off, and began picking the room up a little. The sound off water running filled my head, distracting me. He was only across the hall, in the shower. My body was on edge, he had teased me all day, and it was driving me crazy. I knew I needed to calm down, so I picked out my clothes for bed, taking deep breaths.

I changed into a loose tank top, and boyshort panties, putting my old clothes in the hamper. If he thought he was getting away with what he had done to me earlier he was so in for it.

After Billy had come home we had chatted for a while, then pitched in to make dinner, ate, then moved to the living room, watching tv for awhile. I was almost certain Jacob had been putting it off on purpose. My suspicions were confirmed when Billy had decided he was turning in for bed, and not five minutes after his door was shut Jacob stood up, announcing he needed a shower and was gone.

I went about, picking random socks up from the floor and tossing them into his hamper. I straightened out my makeup bag on the top of his dresser, tucking my necklace away and when I was satisfied it was clean, I crawled into bed. Awaiting my revenge.

It was only a moment later I heard the water shut off, and smiled. He came in, holding a towel around his waist and his dirty clothes in his other hand. He glanced around, noticing the clean floor and tossed his clothes in the hamper. He walked over to me, leaning over the bed and gave me a brief kiss.

"Thanks babe. I would of done it." He gave me his best smile, and I melted slightly. Okay so maybe he wasn't in so much trouble.

He turned, closing the door and locking it. Then went to his dresser, opening one draw and pulling out a pair of black boxers. I caught his tiny glance at me, he knew I was watching him. He smirked slightly, then like before casually pulled his towel from his waist and dropped it into his hamper. I didn't feel even the littlest bit of embarrassment ogling him, I knew he didn't mind and I was going to take what I could get. He slid on his boxers smoothly, walking to the wall and flipping the light switch off. Finally he crawled into bed, facing me.

"Your awfully quiet." He remarked. My eyes narrowed.

"I'm thinking about the best way to make you pay." I said matter of factly. He just grinned, not a shred of guilt on his face. Reaching for me, he pulled me onto his lap, my legs on either side of his hips. His hands wormed their way under my top, resting on my lower back.

"How about if I apologize repeatedly?" That mischievous glint was in his eyes again, and I felt my body tense in anticipation. I deliberated.

"Maybe. If you mean it." Despite my firm tone my hands found there way to his muscled chest, I was hopeless to stay away.

"Oh i'll definitely mean it." His voice was low, deeper than his normal tone and his eyes were smoldering .

He pulled me close, kissing me passionately for a while, his scent engulfing my senses until all I could feel, or smell was him. His hands strayed, running over my sensitive skin until I was tingling all over. One traveled down my hip, his long fingers brushing teasingly over my ass. He gripped my thigh, scooting me closer to him.

I couldn't decided weather this was so much better, or so, so much worse. His hard erection was nestled between my legs, sending a rush of desire through my body. It craved to move against his, seeking out some kind of relief from the tight ball twisting in my stomach. But I didn't know what to do, or what was allowed, so I remained still, his kisses leaving my panting mouth and trailing down my neck.

The fire grew in me, over shadowing everything else and my hips twiched, rolling slightly over his. The motion sent an electric shock throughout my body, momentarily freezing me with pleasure. His hands tightened on me, and I heard a low growl come from his mouth. It only made it worse, I loved when he did that.

"Jacob.." I moaned his name, losing all control of my body.

I knew this wasn't going to end well, I was to far gone to care about the rules and being responsible. I wanted him desperately. The physical ache to have some part of him, to have some part of this intense feeling in me to be released, was to great. I needed it. Him.

That's when he pulled away suddenly, his hands leaving my body, and in the same second he had both my wrists in his hands, holding my palms away from his body. It was then I realized how frantic his breath was, and how worried and almost crazed his eyes were. I remembered some of are conversations, about how much worse it was for him when he had to handle his own need, ontop of mine.

I was immediately filled with guilt. I didn't want to push him, I could see how much he was struggling. But the tight ball in the pit of my stomach didn't loosen, and I knew it would go unsatisfied tonight.

Burying my disappointment I gave him a gentle smile. I kissed his mouth once, softly and lifted myself off him. I pulled the blankets up over us and took his hand, pulling him slightly down, willing him to relax and join me. He seemed hesitant, but slid down, allowing me to cuddle up to him. My hand rested on his bare chest, feeling his heart slow down to a normal pace.

 _I accept your apology._

He chuckled once, his large hand enveloping mine. He sighed quietly, his demeanor off, but he turned his head, placing a kiss to my forehead.

"I love you." He said softly. The last shreds of dissatisfaction fizzing out. I knew it didn't really matter. I would deal with it all, every single day, if it meant keeping him.

"I love you my Jacob." I told him, snuggling closer and closing my eyes. Despite sleeping in so late I still felt exhausted. It was only minutes later I was pulled under into my unconsciousness.


End file.
